Author Archives: Joe

March 28, 2015

WrestleMania XXXI Preview/Predictions

By Joe

WM31PosterIt comes every year along with the spring. The “Showcase of the Immortals,” the grand-daddy of them all:  WrestleMania. Ever since WWE Chairman Vince McMahon concocted the idea for a wrestling (ahem, sports entertainment) show with the same prestige as the NFL’s Superbowl it’s been an annual tradition. The event has had its ups and downs over the past 30 years. WrestleMania III famously set an indoor attendance record in Detroit with Hulk Hogan taking on Andre the Giant in the main event, and yet, the wildly popular Attitude Era, was kicked off with Stone Cold Steven Austin defeating Shawn Michaels for the WWF Championship in front of a modest crowd of 19,000. The massive stadium shows have really only come back in the last ten years, and along with it, WrestleMania’s prestige. WrestleMania XXX was the best of the WWE Pay-Per View events in 2014, and that’s how it should be.

WrestleMania XXXI is arriving with a little less pomp than it has the last couple of years. The card for WrestleMania XXVII was not spectacular, but The Rock was hosting and had some real heat with John Cena. The following year, the two locked horns in the main event of WrestleMania XXVIII and would do so again at WrestleMania XXIX. Last year, Daniel Bryan was red-hot as he road into the Superdome for WrestleMania XXX, though arguably the event will forever be associated with The Undertaker and his loss to Brock Lesnar, his first loss at WrestleMania in 22 appearances. This year, the main event is champion Brock Lesnar taking on the up and comer Roman Reigns. The WWE fanbase is not as behind Reigns as the company probably expected they would be, with fan favorites like Bryan, Dolph Ziggler, and Dean Ambrose trapped in the undercard. Despite that though, the card has come together pretty well and there’s a chance for some classic WrestleMania moments. There’s also the chance the whole thing could blow up in WWE’s face. This is an important show for WWE as the company needs to keeping adding subscribers to its WWE Network. There’s a strong chance a lot of people jumped on board for WrestleMania season and plan to cancel after March (last year, a six month commitment was required to keep this very thing from happening but that restriction has since been removed) and a good showing could keep people around a little longer. I am cautiously optimistic about WrestleMania XXXI so let’s get onto the card and how I see things unfolding (note: I avoid online “dirt sheets” so I’m insulated from what is rumored to happen).

The Andre the Giant Battle Royal – Pre-show Match

NXT star Hideo Itami will make his WrestleMania debut during the Andre the Giant Battle Royal.

NXT star Hideo Itami will make his WrestleMania debut during the Andre the Giant Battle Royal.

Last year, the WWE debuted the Andre the Giant Battle Royal and the win went to Cesaro, who stole the spotlight by slamming The Big Show over the top rope. This year, the match has been moved to the pre-show and given that Cesaro quickly found himself buried on the undercard following his victory there’s less enthusiasm for the match this year. The biggest storyline going into the event is the growing rift between The Miz and his personal assistant, Damien Mizdow. There’s also a minor feud between Kane and Big Show while Ryback has been showcased as a potential winner on Raw and Smackdown. Sheamus has had numerous teasers air over the past month advertising his imminent return to the main roster and it’s possible he’ll be a surprise entrant. NXT star Hideo Itami won a tournament on Thursday that puts him in the match as well.

Prediction: Mizdow turns on The Miz and eliminates him, but he eventually is eliminated by Ryback who picks up the win. Itami gets a chance to shine while Curtis “Axelmania” Axel gets taken out before he enters the ring.

Tag-Team Championship Match: Tyson Kidd and Cesaro (C) vs The Usos vs Los Matadores vs The New Day

Cesaro and Kidd have been one of the few bright spots in a lackluster tag division.

Cesaro and Kidd have been one of the few bright spots in a lackluster tag division.

The tag-team division has been rather bland for the past year+ as The Usos dominated 2014 with little competition to play off of. Some of that has been poor writing and booking as there’s talent in the division, but with so much time devoted to long-winded promos on Raw focused on the main event talent, a lot of the undercard has suffered. Even though 2014 didn’t go well for Cesaro in singles competition, he and Kidd have made for a pretty entertaining tag-team and they have good chemistry in the ring. The New Day has been a flop, Los Matadors a side-show, with The Usos seemingly representing the only threat. There’s been no flow to the tag-team division all year, so given that, the match has a bit of a chaotic vibe. This match could be a nice opener for the show if given enough time (and really, that shouldn’t be an issue considering the show is booked to be four hours long), but it also could come across like a typical Raw match. If a match is to be squeezed for time, it will be this one.

Prediction: WWE could put the belts on The New Day in an attempt to jump-start a program that the promotion spent a lot of time hyping. The safe bet, and most likely outcome, is for Tyson Kidd and Cesaro to retain.

AJ Lee and Paige vs The Bella Twins

Apparently WWE couldn’t settle on an opponent for Divas Champion Nikki Bella so we’re getting a tag-team match pairing her with her sister Brie against former champs Paige and AJ. Paige and AJ spent much of 2014 feuding with each other and they enter this match on rocky footing. Much of the build-up has been focused on those two at the expense of their opponents as well as on the Give Divas a Chance social media movement. Because of that movement, it seems likely these women will be given a solid amount of time and a legitimate chance at having a good match, as opposed to being a five-minute after-thought. I’d rather see a traditional one on one bout where two ladies are given the chance to steal the show, but we may have to wait until WrestleMania XXXII when (hopefully) NXT stars Charlotte and Sasha Banks are on the main roster.

Prediction: I’d actually love it if the nefarious Bellas took-out AJ before the match and one of those aforementioned NXT ladies took her place. That’s no slight on AJ, she’s just been a part of WrestleMania’s past, unlike Paige. The NXT women, and their incredible matches throughout last year, are the driving force behind the whole Give Divas a Chance thing and it would be great to see one of them be showcased at the event. Absent that though, I’m predicting Paige and AJ’s inability to cooperate leads to defeat, setting up a feud going forward while Nikki is free to focus on Charlotte, who I expect to debut on Monday’s Raw.

Intercontinental Championship Ladder Match: Bad News Barrett (C) vs Daniel Bryan vs Dolph Ziggler vs R-Truth vs Dean Ambrose vs Stardust vs Luke Harper

The mega-popular Daniel Bryan will be looking to win his first Intercontinental Championship at WrestleMania XXXI.

The mega-popular Daniel Bryan will be looking to win his first Intercontinental Championship at WrestleMania XXXI.

Barrett defeated Ambrose at Fastlane, the PPV event that preceded WrestleMania, and following the conclusion of that match, Ambrose made off with Barrett’s belt. Since then the belt has traded hands amongst the competitors in this bout despite no one actually winning the belt from Barrett. It was funny at times to watch, silly as well, but it’s hard to argue with this outcome. All of the guys in this match, even the often forgotten R-Truth, are extremely talented and if one match is likely to steal the show it’s clearly this one. Toss in the chaotic nature of a ladder match and this easily becomes one to get excited about. Some fans are ticked that a guy like Daniel Bryan is suddenly battling for a lesser title than the WWE Heavy Championship, but with Brock Lesnar being a part-time champ it makes sense to elevate the prestige of the mid-card belts.

Prediction: And that’s just what WWE wants. Bryan wins and becomes Smackdown’s fighting champion and a feud with Ziggler seems imminent. Those two could bring the house down if allowed and perhaps finally the Intercontinental Championship will seem like an important title, which it really hasn’t been for years.

Randy Orton vs Seth Rollins

This one is a classic grudge match between two personalities who hate each other. Orton was off of television for months to sell an injury at the hands of Rollins. Following a return at Fastlane, Orton played coy with Rollins before finally snapping a couple of weeks ago. Orton is a good worker, not a great one, but he’s fully capable of having a great match when paired with a complementary talent. Rollins definitely qualifies as he’s become one of the most electric competitors in the business. Strangely though, he’s still largely untested on the big stage when it comes to singles competition, with his best work often taking place in six-man or triple threat settings. Since the stakes in this match are so low, it’s also possible this match gets is a victim of time constraints if any of the earlier matches go on longer than expected.

Prediction: This one is hard to predict. Orton could use a big win, but Rollins could too. The wildcard is Rollins’ Money in the Bank contract which gives him a title match whenever he chooses to exercise it, meaning he could potentially end the night as WWE Heavyweight Champion. If that were to happen, then I could see Orton winning kind of like Owen Hart beat his brother Brett to open WrestleMania X, only for Brett to go on and defeat Yokozuna for the WWF Championship in the main event. I think the likelihood of Rollins ending the night as champ is low, so I expect him to go over Orton here.

United States Championship Match: Rusev (C) vs John Cena

For the past year, Rusev has been the unstoppable monster heel of WWE. No one has pinned him or made him submit yet, and his anti-US rhetoric makes him kind of a throwback heel. He’s fought mostly lesser stars, until last month when he took on, and defeated, John Cena. Cena has shown off a mean-streak since in getting Rusev to agree to a rematch at WrestleMania. Oddsmakers think this one will go Cena’s way, but I’m not sure.

Prediction: It seems hard to fathom that John Cena could lose twice in a row to Rusev. Last year, he was in a similar situation as he took on an up and coming monster heel in Bray Wyatt. Cena won that encounter, but it just doesn’t make sense to me for him to beat Rusev. Cena does not gain anything by beating Rusev, I’d prefer to see WWE save Rusev’s first loss for a less-established guy who can gain instant credibility. Someone like Adrian Neville, who’s expected to be promoted from NXT, would make sense. Cena does not. I expect Rusev to win, possibly by DQ so Cena can save some face.

Bray Wyatt vs The Undertaker

The last time wrestling fans saw The Undertaker it was following one of the most shocking moments in wrestling history.

The last time wrestling fans saw The Undertaker it was following one of the most shocking moments in wrestling history.

The Undertaker losing at WrestleMania XXX was one of the most shocking moments in WWE history. At the time, I wasn’t sure it was the right move to have Undertaker lose to an already established guy like Brock Lesnar, but credit WWE for handling Lesnar well since then. Undertaker, meanwhile, has not appeared on WWE television since then even during the build-up to this match with Wyatt. Last year’s match with Lesnar was not a good one, due in part to Undertaker suffering a severe concussion during the match, but also due to Undertaker being 49 years old. It remains to be seen what he has left in the tank, even with a year off. And as much as I like Wyatt, I’m not sure he’s the kind of talent that can carry a hobbled Undertaker through a match. Expect a lot of posturing in this one.

Prediction: WrestleMania XXXII will be held in Dallas, Texas. Even though Taker has been famously billed as being from Death Valley, it’s fairly common knowledge that he’s actually from Texas. Therefore, I expect Undertaker to compete next year in what may very well be his retirement match. As such, Undertaker losing here and heading into next year 21-2 seems unlikely. I expect either an Undertaker win or a non-finish. If Wyatt and Taker deliver a great match, it’s possible next year we’ll get a rematch where Wyatt gets the win. Or it’s possible that Undertaker competes against another Texan, like a returning Stone Cold, or we could get The Dream Match which pits Undertaker against one of the guys competing in the next match…

Triple H vs Sting

After years of waiting for the right moment, Sting will make his in-ring debut for WWE against Triple H at WrestleMania XXXI.

After years of waiting for the right moment, Sting will make his in-ring debut for WWE against Triple H at WrestleMania XXXI.

After flirting with WWE for years, Sting finally appeared in a WWE ring this past November at Survivor Series, foiling the plans of Triple H’s Authority stable in the main event. Since then he has appeared sporadically, but the last month has been a busy one for the Stinger as he and Triple H have built up this match. Unfortunately, the wait for Sting to appear in a WWE ring has been so long that he’s now past the age of 50. These two men, combined, are over 100 years old and the quality of this match is very much in question. Hopefully, the prestige of the match-up is enough for them to feed off of because it would be a shame if Sting’s first, possibly only, WWE match was a poor one. Triple H, despite being a part-timer himself, has continued to look good whenever he does lace up his boots. He’s in great shape, and his ability to carry Sting through a match is likely the main reason why he’s in this position as opposed to The Undertaker.

Prediction: It seems almost pointless for Sting to finally appear at WrestleMania only to go down in defeat. Even though the opposite momentum rule, where wrestling often follows a predictable booking pattern of having the guy who looks strongest leading up to a big match lose, strongly favors Triple H, I still envision a Sting victory. Because these guys are as old as they are, it’s possible there will be a lot of interference in this one to slow things down. In the end though, Triple H taps to the Scorpion Deathlock. And if all goes well, maybe we see Sting next year against Undertaker.

WWE Heavyweight Championship Match: Brock Lesnar (C) vs Roman Reigns

Uncertainty clouds the main event of WrestleMania XXXI, which is how it should be.

Uncertainty clouds the main event of WrestleMania XXXI, which is how it should be.

Much to WWE’s surprise, Roman Reigns’ victory in the Royal Rumble was greeted with boos. Even a rare appearance by The Rock couldn’t change things. Since, WWE has tried to repair Reigns’ image with the fanbase, pitting him against Daniel Bryan in the main event at Fastlane and by limiting his mic work. Reigns has done well in this role and he is an up and coming talent. Maybe the spot will prove too big for him, but he and Lesnar make for a pretty solid pairing. The issue there is that “solid” isn’t what you want for a WrestleMania main event. Lesnar has been the absentee champion. His part-time contract with WWE means he’s been booked as an attraction. It was a risk putting the title on him, but he’s been so good in his role that it’s hard to argue with the results. The belt has real prestige, and whoever knocks off Lesnar is going to get a big boost in credibility from such a feat. I think these two are going to have a very good match, probably not the match of the evening, but a damn good bout.

Prediction: Up until this past week, Lesnar’s status with the company was very much in question. His contract was going to expire after WrestleMania, making his defeat at WrestleMania XXXI seem almost guaranteed (which is one reason why so many fans were upset when Reigns won the Royal Rumble as the perception was whoever won that match would be the next WWE Champion) as he teased a return to UFC. Speculation about Lesnar’s future ended though when he announced on ESPN that he had resigned with WWE and was closing the door on his MMA career. Now, it seems, the tide has turned completely and many now expect Lesnar to retain at WrestleMania. There remains the possibility that WWE will turn those jeers aimed at Reigns into a full-fledged heel run having Lesnar’s manager, Paul Heyman, turn on him helping Reigns claim victory.  I don’t think that will happen, but it is a possibility. WWE has spent so much time building up Lesnar this past year that it just doesn’t feel like the right time to have him go down in defeat. Lesnar retains at WrestleMania.

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March 24, 2015

Porco Rosso

By Joe
Porco Rosso (1992)

Porco Rosso (1992)

It almost seems pointless at this point to sing the praises of Studio Ghibli and its famous director, the great Hayao Miyazaki. The internet is dotted with support for his brilliance and his films are readily available on US soil thanks to an agreement between Studio Ghibli and The Walt Disney Company. Even so, it’s still worthwhile repeating that Miyazaki is a supremely gifted director with an apparent synergy with the animation medium. Many of his works are animated films because that’s just what Miyazaki does. They could have easily been shot in live-action and more obviously marketed towards adults. Some possess such fantastic imagery that it’s clear to see why they are animated, while a film such as The Wind Rises, Miyazaki’s most recent and possibly his last, is essentially a drama well-grounded in reality that just happens to be animated.

Porco Rosso is one of Miyazaki’s older works. Debuting in Japanese cinemas in 1992, it tells the tale of a former Italian flying ace turned bounty hunter cursed to live out the rest of his life with the face of a pig. Like The Wind Rises, it romanticizes the role of the pilot and easily could have been a live-action piece (though the pig-faced Porco may not have played as well as an actual person). And like many of Studio Ghibli’s films, it’s now available via Disney Blu Ray which is how I had the pleasure of experiencing it.

The film opens with Porco battling sky pirates: pirates that choose to attack luxury cruise ships via seaplane. The setting is post World War I and Porco has apparently been hired by the ship owners to keep the pirates away. We immediately get a sense of the film’s tone as the pirates are pretty bad at what they do and Porco is quite nonchalant in his attitude towards them. He combats them via a seaplane of his own, a beat-up old red thing that has trouble getting off the water, and has little trouble foiling their plans and freeing their hostages. There’s an obvious lack of danger throughout the sequence despite the bullets flying through the air but it doesn’t harm the enjoyment of the scene. Following this confrontation, we’re shown a little more of the setting. The pirates, looking to rid themselves of Porco once and for all, have turned to an American named Curtis. Curtis sees this as an opportunity for fame and fortune as he yearns for a career in Hollywood. He also would like to woo Porco’s longtime friend and proprietor of a local establishment frequented by pirates and pilots alike, Gina.

Preparing for take-off.

Preparing for take-off.

Curtis is an interesting character from a westerner’s point of view. Some may call his portrayal unflattering, or even offensive, as he does not possess any obvious virtues. I found it interesting to see how an American is stereotyped outside of the country and found the character pretty amusing. He is a skilled pilot and represents some sense of danger in an otherwise light-hearted film, and is a natural foil for the care-free Porco.

After a confrontation with Curtis that leaves Porco’s plane in need of repairs, Porco is forced to head back to his homeland of Italy where he is wanted for desertion. Porco’s mechanic Piccolo is introduced, along with his family and a large contingent of locals, and proves to be a very entertaining addition to the cast. What could have been a slow and boring part of the film turns into a strength. Some credit should go to the english translators who are able to come up with snappy dialogue to suit the original tone of the scenes as well as fit the mouth-flaps of the animated characters. The film builds towards a confrontation between Porco and Curtis, one Porco seems disinterested in, and plays upon the notion of pilot’s honor. There’s also a bit of a romantic angle thrown in that feels tacked on but isn’t focused on enough to be a distraction.

Porco and Fio are a natural movie pairing. I'd dog the two for being too typical an odd couple if they didn't work so well together onscreen.

Porco and Fio are a natural movie pairing. I’d dog the two for being too typical an odd couple if they didn’t work so well together onscreen.

The star of the film is clearly the Porco character, not just because of his prominence in the title but in his personality as well. He’s a flawed human but an inherently interesting one. He’s funny, boorish, yet charming. The english version features Michael Keaton as the voice of Porco. At first, I wasn’t sure his voice suited the character but I warmed to it quickly. Keaton is almost deadpan in his delivery at times, but he’s able to lend his charisma to the character through the excellent script and his superb delivery. The rest of the cast features some names familiar to those who have watched a lot of anime. Gina is played by Susan Egan, who has done a lot of work in the field of animation and is a consummate pro. Brad Garrett, who also seems to be amassing a lot of voice credits, plays the leader of the seaplane pirates and Kimberly Williams-Paisley portrays Piccolo’s granddaughter Fio with charming exuberance. Joe Hisaishi is once again the composer who utilizes a lot of period pieces to help enhance the film’s setting. The main Porco theme is one of my favorite works he’s composed as its perky nature suits the tone of the film perfectly.

Even the "bad guys" in this film are likable.

Even the “bad guys” in this film are likable.

The animation, as always, is breath-taking. The colors are rich and are only more so on the Blu Ray medium. I particularly love the shade of red used for Porco’s seaplane and the understated blues of the ocean water. Milan is drawn wonderfully and a sequence featuring Porco racing through the city’s canals is probably the most technically impressive of the whole film. The level of detail shown in the plane components was something I found myself appreciating and it’s quite clear that Miyazaki has a love for airplanes.

The film moves at a comfortable pace, wrapping up in just over 90 minutes. It’s tone never wavers as it’s quite high-spirited and inherently fun. I don’t know if I was just turned off by Porco’s look going in, but I wasn’t really excited to watch this film at first but it quickly won me over. It compares quite favorably to My Neighbor Totoro in that it isn’t a deeply serious film with a lot on the line. It’s really just a good old-fashioned adventure full of likable characters, captivating action, and gorgeous visuals.

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March 1, 2015

Walt Disney’s One Hundred and One Dalmatians

By Joe
One Hundred and One Dalmatians (1961)

One Hundred and One Dalmatians (1961)

If one were to research, even briefly, the history of Walt Disney Animation Studios one would find many successes as well as many failures, some of which by films considered classics today. Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs was the big break-through for the studio and it set a precedent for feature-length animation. Following that picture though, war broke out in Europe and suddenly Disney’s audience was much harder to reach. Perhaps the charm of a feature-length animated picture had worn off following Snow White’s success as well, for the the next several films put out by Disney failed to meet expectations. Following a series of “package films” in the 1940’s, Disney returned to prominence, and profitability, with Cinderella in 1950. The follow-up, Alice in Wonderland, performed poorly at the box office, but the next several films fared much better all the way up to Sleeping Beauty, that is. Sleeping Beauty bombed, despite being the most expensive film the studio ever put out. It was such a disaster that many around Walt Disney were suggesting the company get out of animation, which was something Disney refused to entertain. He was able to acknowledge that their current process needed change. While films like Peter Pan and Lady and the Tramp had been profitable, the profit margin on those films wasn’t what the studio needed to keep going. Success was also being found on television and with live-action films as well as the recently opened Disneyland theme park. Disney probably did not need animation, but it’s what the studio had been founded on.

The Pongos, most of them anyways.

The Pongos, most of them anyways.

One Hundred and One Dalmatians was a big film for Disney. While it can’t be said with certainty that had the film failed Disney would have abandoned animation, it’s probable to assume things would have turned out much differently. It’s a good thing then that the film not only was a hit with movie-goers and critics but also a hit when it came to the bottomline. Utilizing Xerox, the film ended up being much cheaper to produce than its predecessors leading to a very healthy profit margin. Instead of being one of the last animated features from the company, it ended up being the first of many achieved through the Xerox process.

It’s well-known that Walt Disney was fond of recalling that the success of his company all started with a mouse, but despite that Walt’s most favorite animal was clearly the dog. One Hundred and One Dalmatians was the studio’s second feature to utilize canines as the lead protagonists, and much like Lady and the Tramp, the film serves as a window to the unseen world of dogs that we humans are oblivious to. Adapted from the book A Hundred and One Dalmatians by Dodie Smith, the film tells the tale of a dalmatian named Pongo, his “pet” human Roger, and how they came to be romantically linked with Perdita and Anita and proud parents of fifteen puppies. Everything would have been quite lovely had it not been for Cruella De Vil, Anita’s old classmate with an appetite for fur that can only be sated by dalmatian coats. The story is one of suspense, with some elements of mystery and plenty of humor added in. It works well with its modest 79 minute running time which foregoes the usual Disney musical style.

Several scenes in the film feature simple, almost one color backgrounds.

Several scenes in the film feature simple, almost one color backgrounds.

Stylistically the film is rather serious in tone, but from the point of view of dogs. It opens with Pongo deducing he and Roger’s lives as bachelors needs to end and he is outwardly searching for a mate for his pet (while also taking care to make sure his own needs are met). Unlike the dogs in Lady and the Tramp who seem to define their lives based on their loyalty to their masters, Pongo clearly views himself as the master in this relationship. He respects the needs of Roger, to a point, but when his puppies go missing later in the film he clearly implies that humans can’t solve their problems. Lady and the Tramp chose to emphasize that its story was from the point of view of dogs by keeping the camera at dog level, rarely straying far enough from the ground to even glimpse the visages of the humans Jim Dear and Darling. One Hundred and One Dalmatians is more straight-forward and positions its shots in a more traditional manner. The backgrounds are minimalist, a drastic change from the prior films from Disney, and it opts to use more flat colors with little to no shading. The film is also the most contemporary of any Disney film prior as its modern setting is quite different from the fantasy worlds many of the Disney films exist in. This even allows the story-tellers to utilize satire when depicting television and how the characters interact with it.

They don't come meaner than Cruella.

They don’t come meaner than Cruella.

Cruella De Vil, and her lackeys Horace and Jasper, is one of Disney’s finest villains. Her motivations are clear, rational considering her character, and easy to despise. Even those who do not consider themselves dog-lovers likely would not support someone in their quest to slaughter puppies for their fur. She is strikingly wicked looking, with sharp angles and manic eyes. Her face appears to be stretched to its limit to cover her skull, and her two-toned hair has become a hallmark of the character. She barges into the home of Anita and Roger, her fur coat slipping from her bony shoulders and the smoke-trail from her cigarette permeates the air and appears to be a character all its own. She drives an enormous vehicle like the biggest asshole you’ll ever encounter on the road and is prone to violent outbursts. Her voice actress, Betty Lou Gerson, is absolutely perfect with her performance and it is hard to imagine anyone else doing a better job with the role. Horace and Jasper are her henchman. They handle the puppy-napping and were to also handle the slaughter but they’re typical, stupid, lazy, cohorts and are easily out-maneuvered by the film’s protagonists. They’re also mindless servants to television with their eyes constantly glued to the box and whatever rubbish is presented on it.

The pencil lines left behind by Xerox are easy to see in Roger's sleeves.

The pencil lines left behind by Xerox are easy to see in Roger’s sleeves.

The film is a success where profit and entertainment is concerned, but it must be said that this all came with a cost. The Xerox process, conceived of by Ub Iwerks, had its drawbacks when compared with the old process of drawing, inking, and painting each animation cell by hand. Naturally, the advantage was in cost as now the drawings by the animators were simply copied to cel by Xerox, eliminating the need for inking. Then they could go right to paint, and time was also saved by simply copying one image of a puppy several times over for the scenes involving the whole lot. The most obvious drawback to this process was the inability of Xerox to smooth out a pencil line during the copying, giving each character a rough, scratchy, look. Prior films were recognizable by the softness of the lines but also the rich, colored, outline each character possessed. Lady and the Tramp is my pick as the best looking of the Disney pictures. The characters pop even when placed on busy and highly-detailed backgrounds. Of course, the other drawback was that the entire inking staff was laid off, which meant hundreds of women lost their jobs in an era where work was hard to come by for women. Walt Disney Studios famously employed women almost exclusively for inking and painting, mostly due to prejudices of the time. They let men handle the drawing and decision-making when it came to creating the pictures. It obviously takes talent to ink and paint animation, but it was also thought-of as being a lesser position to artist. Still, the only other positions for women at the time were with the telephone company and service industries so it must have hurt when Disney shut-down inking. Walt Disney himself was not a fan of Xerox and disliked the look of the picture. Over the years, the process was improved upon but it would be decades before the pictures started to resemble the old films, which all came long after Disney’s passing. Art Director for Dalmatians, Ken Anderson, was said to be saddened by Walt’s opinion of the film’s look, though according to him Walt unofficially gave the art of the film his blessing shortly before he passed away.

Evil women drive evil cars.

Evil women drive evil cars.

One Hundred and One Dalmatians is a significant film for several reasons for Walt Disney Animation Studios. It’s the film that saved animation but also the film that changed it forever. Having recently viewed the Blu Ray release, I can say the film is actually more enjoyable than I remembered it from my childhood. The characters, despite mostly being dogs, are believable and their world is fun and fascinating. Visually, the film does suffer when compared with what came before it, but it also includes a wonderful car chase sequence that creatively utilized actual three-dimensional models to achieve its look. Even though the art is not as wonderful as it could have been, the film is animated superbly. The dogs walk like dogs, the humans display great personality with their mannerisms, and the action scenes are engrossing on their own. What little use the film makes of musical numbers is done quite well, with Cruella’s theme being one of the most memorable of all the Disney villain themes. One Hundred and One Dalmatians was the last great picture released by Walt Disney during his lifetime and it’s one fans will continue to treasure for years to come.

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February 7, 2015

Revisiting The Simpsons as Lego

By Joe

Lego-The-Simpsons-episodeLast July, I made a post about 2014’s newest addition to the Lego family:  The Simpsons. Two of the world’s most popular brands teamed-up not just for a Lego-themed episode of the iconic television show, but also to bring several of the show’s many characters to life as little three inch plastic toys. The big addition was also the release of The Simpsons’ house in Lego form which covered the bulk of my post.

Well now it’s 2015, and if this Lego fan-blog can be believed, we’ve got a new round of Simpsons Lego merchandise to look forward to in the spring. And considering the snow is piled high outside my home right now, spring can’t come soon enough. I ended that post from last summer wondering about what was to come as it pertained to Lego and The Simpsons. There was the possibility that The Simpsons would be one and done, and had they been, it wouldn’t have been a slight. An entire wave of mini figures was devoted to the brand and The Simpsons house is positively massive by Lego standards. It’s questionable how well a brand that is mostly aimed at older individuals would sell as a toy, especially considering that the show is no longer as popular as it used to be. Truth be told, I have no idea if kids today watch The Simpsons as I did when I was young enough to be interested in Lego as a plaything. Still, I hoped we would see more from Lego concerning The Simpsons because there is so much left untouched as it stands now, and my Simpsons’ house could use some company.

Maggie doesn't have many looks on the show, but this is her most popular aside from her traditional blue onesie.

Maggie doesn’t have many looks on the show, but this is her most popular aside from her traditional blue onesie.

Here’s how 2015 is currently looking: We’ve got another wave of mini-figures on the way and at least one more building set. The lineup for mini-figure wave two is quite appropriate given what came out last year and what would be expected of a second wave. First off, there’s a new version for each member of The Simpsons family. Collectors and fans of the show are probably disappointed by that as we already have two versions for each as it is, but anyone who has ever followed a toyline as a kid or adult knows this is par for the course. Just like every wave of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles action figures needs another version of each turtle, expect future waves of Simpsons figures to contain Homer, Bart, Lisa, Marge, and Maggie. I was kind of hoping maybe Lego would just include another Homer and Bart, given that they’re the two most popular, but oh well. At least we’re getting Bart as Bartman, a pretty popular version of the character, and while we don’t know what Lisa and Maggie will look like, both are being bundled with one of the family pets, Santa’s Little Helper and Snowball II, who really should have been included with the house last year. Homer and Marge are both in their “Sunday best” so I take that to mean Homer’s blue suit and Marge’s long, green dress that the duo often wear to church. It wouldn’t surprise me if Lisa and Maggie are similarly dressed, though I’m kind of hoping we get Maggie in her starfish-like snow suit.

The remaining supporting characters rumored to be a part of wave two are a mix of popular characters and those that pair well with other figures. Martin naturally fits in with Bart, Milhouse and the other kids while Smithers can finally be placed alongside Mr. Burns. Groundskeeper Willie and Comic Book Guy are fan favorites and it’s nice to see the retired Edna Krabappel included as well. Some notable omissions though are still present. It’s nice to have Edna, but it would be better if we had a Principal Skinner to pair her with. Milhouse as Fall Out Boy is likely included to pair with Bartman, even though it doesn’t make much sense from the perspective of the show and it just makes me want a Radioactive Man (Rainier Wolfcastle) as well. Dr. Hibbert and Professor Frink have been around awhile, so I’m not disappointed to see them included but I personally would prefer Lenny and Carl. There are images of a head mold for the infamous criminal Snake floating around the internet and he is noticeably absent from the list for wave two. My guess is he is being bundled with the Kwik-E-Mart set which will probably also contain another version of Apu, or better yet, Sanjay or Manjula. I’m curious if they’ll sneak another version of one of the Simpsons into the set as well, maybe a version of Homer as a Kwik-E-Mart clerk.

Which brings me to the second part of this post: what I want going forward! We know we’re getting a Kwik-E-Mart which is both logical and welcomed, but we don’t have confirmation for anything else. So here’s a small list of ways Lego could bring Springfield to life (as lifeless plastic):

That's a pretty extreme reaction to Lego's choice to bypass you, Moe.

That’s a pretty extreme reaction to Lego’s choice to bypass you, Moe.

1. Moe’s Tavern: Let’s get this one out of the way upfront. I want it. You want it. Anyone who has any interest in Lego versions of Springfield wants it, but isn’t going to get it. Lego has a pretty strict policy against alcohol and certain forms of violence, and a Lego version of Springfield’s most famous dive is probably out of the question. I’m hopeful that Lego could compromise and give us mini-figures of Moe and his number one patron, Barney, even if they’re in less memorable versions. Moe could be in his casual attire he sometimes wears on the show while Barney could be depicted as either the Plow King or as he was when he got sober. If Lego really wanted to give us Moe’s Tavern while saving face they could always do Moe’s Family Restaurant, which is just Moe’s Tavern from when he decided to try to be more like TGI Friday’s. It’s better than no Moe’s at all!

2. The Android’s Dungeon:  I mentioned this one last year, mostly because it just makes so much sense given the market Lego is courting with The Simpsons. The Android’s Dungeon is the infamous comic book shop run by Jeff, aka: Comic Book Guy. It played a prominent role in the Lego episode of the show and would be a natural set to include a Radioactive Man to pair with Fall Out Boy. Lego could also bundle it with Homer as Angry Dad when he came to resemble the Incredible Hulk or versions of Bart and Lisa from the Halloween special where they became superheroes. I’m actually surprised this set hasn’t already been announced.

These are definitely going to be on display in my house come Christmas time. If I can wait that long.

These are definitely going to be on display in my house come Christmas time. If I can wait that long.

3. Springfield Elementary:  When Department 56, a company known for crafting ceramic Christmas Villages, partnered with The Simpsons last year to do a series of Simpsons inspired ceramics it selected The Simpsons house, the Kwik-E-Mart, and Springfield Elementary to focus on. Lego should do the same. The school would probably end up out of scale when placed beside 742 Evergreen Terrace, but it’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make. As long as it includes a classroom (complete with chalkboard gag), cafeteria, and Principal’s office I’ll be happy. It would pair extremely well with the children of Springfield already released as well as Groundskeeper Willie and Edna. Skinner could also be included along with Lunch Lady Doris and Superintendent Chalmers. Willie’s tractor and shed could be a part of the package and Lego could even include some of the students who have yet to be released. There could be a school bus with Otto. There are so many possibilities! Like the already released home for The Simpsons, this would be an expensive set but one I’d be willing to invest in.

4. Krusty Burger:  We already have a Krusty, so why not the fast food restaurant that bares his image? Krusty Burger would be an attractive piece and would fit in with the Kwik-E-Mart as a smallish-scaled release. It could include another version of Krusty, maybe Sideshow Mel, as well as Mr. Teeny and everyone’s favorite local teenager, Jeremy, the squeaky-voiced teen! If we need to toss-in another member of The Simpsons family, how about an obese Homer?

It sells itself.

It sells itself.

5. Vehicle sets:  New buildings are nice, and probably preferred, but if Lego wanted to do cheaper sets they could always turn to vehicles. One fans would be sure to eat up is Homer as Mr. Plow, one of the show’s most famous episodes. Naturally, that would pair well with Barney’s Plow King. A police cruiser for Wiggum that includes Eddie and Lou seems plausible. The Homer, with Herb Powell, would certainly be an interesting vehicle to behold. Any of Burns’ vehicles or the family’s station wagon would also make sense. If it can’t be included with Springfield Elementary, then Otto’s bus would also be a good one and would be another way to introduce more children of Springfield. Sadly, we probably would never get a Duff Blimp given the previously mentioned alcohol policy, but a man can dream!

There are countless other sets that would be welcomed but didn’t crack my top five. Ned’s house would make sense given it sits right next to The Simpsons’ and we’ve seen the interior of it many times on the the show. Something incorporating the Nuclear Power Plant would make sense, even if it’s just Homer’s control deck or Burns’ office. Burns’ mansion would also be interesting, complete with hounds, and a version of Lard Lad Donuts would fit in nicely with the other smaller builders I proposed. It’s probably unlikely that Lego supports The Simpsons line long enough for even half of these to get produced, but as long as it continues to sell well, Lego will likely keep putting out stuff. If you liked last year’s offerings and if the Kwik-E-Mart turns out well, let Lego know with your dollar that you want to see more of the many locations around Springfield!

2 Comments   |  tags: , , , , , , , , | posted in Television

January 28, 2015

Final Fantasy X-2 HD Remaster

By Joe
Final Fantasy X-2 HD Remaster (2014)

Final Fantasy X-2 HD Remaster (2014)

It was way back in July that I posted about the remastered Final Fantasy X which was released in March on both the Playstation 3 and Playstation Vita. It is now the end of January and I’m just getting around to talking about the companion game with that release:  Final Fantasy X-2. It’s not because I’m lazy, though I have neglected this blog some during that timeframe, but because I actually just recently finished Final Fantasy X-2 even though it was the only game I played on my Vita in that span of time. I didn’t split time between my Vita and 3DS, I actually haven’t touched that system in nearly a year, it’s that I just had enough content to keep myself busy. Now, my handheld gaming is basically confined to my work commute, which became a 3 day commute over the summer thanks to the wonders of telecommuting. Those three days total about 4 hours of gaming per week so maybe it’s not that crazy a game could last me nearly six months but it is pretty cool that between March 2014 and January 2015 I only played one release on my Vita and was perfectly satisfied. That’s getting the most out of forty dollars.

Final Fantasy X-2 has the distinction of being the first true sequel for the Final Fantasy franchise. That seems crazy considering this is an ongoing series stretching back to the late 1980’s, but every longtime fan knows that all of the Final Fantasy games were self-contained games with only thematic and gameplay similarities making them all one franchise. The characters, settings, plots were all different. While some were certainly similar in setting, especially the first five games, they all differentiated themselves quite distinctly. There have been some mega-popular games in the series and ones that fans probably wanted a sequel to more than Final Fantasy X, but be it for creative reasons or economic ones, it was Final Fantasy X that received the first sequel. Final Fantasy X ended on a pretty final note. There certainly were questions about what the characters would do following the events of that game, but not really more than any other title. It wasn’t exactly an “everyone lived happily ever after” ending, but it was far from being a cliffhanger. The direction of the sequel wasn’t obvious, but Square-Enix rightly chose which character to center the sequel around.

The main cast (left to right): Rikku, Yuna, Paine.

The main cast (left to right): Rikku, Yuna, Paine.

Yuna was the pseudo-protagonist of Final Fantasy X. While the main character, Tidus, often reminded the player that this was his story, it would be more appropriate to say it was their story when referencing both Tidus and Yuna. For much of the game, Yuna was Sherlock Holmes to Tidus’ Watson and we were experiencing her journey as a summoner through the eyes of a different character. In Final Fantasy X, Yuna was reserved, somewhat shy, and lacking in confidence. She grew throughout her journey, but the events at the end would lead one to wonder just how she would adjust to her new life. Final Fantasy X-2 picks up two years after the first game’s conclusion and we find a Yuna bursting with energy and a sense of adventure. Together with Final Fantasy X hold-over (and her cousin) Rikku, plus new-comer Paine, she travels Spira in search of lost spheres which are essentially records of Spira’s past. There’s a market for such spheres as Spira comes to grips with the loss of its center, the Yevon religion, which was exposed as fraudulent during the events of Final Fantasy X.

When Final Fantasy X-2 was originally unveiled, the thing most gamers and press seemed to key in on were the three main characters:  Yuna, Rikku, and Paine. It might not be obvious based on their names, but all three characters are female. And all three were the only playable characters (sort of, more on that later) in the game. This was pretty significant for the time as Final Fantasy had never really had a female lead, let alone an all female party. It was a pretty bold move, especially in the West where the video game fanbase is almost exclusively male. Not surprisingly, there was some backlash and amongst my friends I came upon those who had no interest in playing a “girl” or “gay” game (we were in high school and certainly still growing up). It didn’t help things that the game essentially opens up with the characters attending a J-Pop concert where Yuna is the apparent performer. The game makes the declaration that it isn’t going to shy away from the fact that the main characters are women. They could have portrayed them in a masculine or more subtle way but chose not to. The only thing I would criticize the game designers for is the overly sexualized nature of the characters. Some of the battle attire the girls where is just not at all practical and pretty ridiculous.

If you're going into battle against knives, guns, and who knows what else, this doesn't seem like the best choice of attire.

If you’re going into battle against knives, guns, and who knows what else, this doesn’t seem like the best choice of attire.

Because of some of the design choices, the game alienated people from the start and it has often felt like an overlooked title in the Final Fantasy series. I played the Playstation 2 version and enjoyed some aspects of it while I didn’t others. At the time, I think I was suffering from some RPG fatigue because I remember the game being a slog for me. I finished it, but it was sort of a joyless experience. I wasn’t thrilled to play the HD version as a result, but fortunately for me I enjoyed the game a lot more the second time around.

The foundation of the game is fundamentally solid. It’s essentially Final Fantasy V complete with the return of the Active-Time Battle System and the job class system, with some tweaks. The job system is now known as the dress sphere system, but it works the same. Characters are free to choose between any dress sphere which includes staples such as the warrior, white mage, black mage, thief, and so on along with a few unique to the game. The major twist for X-2 is that characters can switch between dress spheres during battle, providing they equipped them to their character’s Garment Grid. The Garment Grid is like a mini Sphere Grid from Final Fantasy X that features open nodes that can be equipped with any dress sphere. The character can move from one node to another during one turn in battle, but must move to adjacent nodes. The grids also bestow other special abilities like certain spells or stat buffs. It’s pretty customizable and a lot of fun to mix and match dress spheres among the three characters. Each girl is obviously better suited for certain spheres, Rikku is the speed character while Paine is the strongest attacker, but all three girls can make any dress sphere work. The lone weakness of the system is that some dress spheres are far superior to others, which lessens the enjoyment of mixing things up, but I found it pretty addicting to keep mastering different dress spheres by unlocking all of their abilities.

The rest of the game functions a little different from traditional Final Fantasy titles as well by going with a mission based approach. The game is separated into five chapters with each one containing a few story-line based missions that must be completed. The rest are ancillary but strongly encouraged. Just plowing through the game, I suspect someone could beat it in around twenty hours but it wouldn’t be as much fun. There are plenty of dull missions but most add something either in the form of humor or challenge. Particularly at the end of the game, there are several challenging missions that will definitely consume a lot of time. Completing tasks contribute to the completion percentage of the game, with the obvious goal being to achieve 100% and getting the “best” ending. It’s possible to do so on the first play-through, but there’s a lot of junk you would never hit on without a guide. Silly things like talking to certain characters in a specific order can ruin your shot at 100%. It can be frustrating to be forty hours into the game and find out you have no shot at 100% on one play through, but that’s what Square-Enix was going for as they wanted gamers to play the game a second time as your completion percentage will carry over.

The J-Pop stuff is pretty silly, but it is by no means a game-breaker if it's not your cup of tea.

The J-Pop stuff is pretty silly, but it is by no means a game-breaker if it’s not your cup of tea.

Thematically, Final Fantasy X-2 is a much lighter experience compared with its predecessor. Final Fantasy X wasn’t exactly a melodrama, but it had some weightier tones. X-2 somewhat embodies that J-Pop intro in that it’s mostly a game featuring three women having the time of their lives. There is some tragedy to the story, especially in the wake of the events of Final Fantasy X, but it’s mostly a fun experience. The music, even with a couple of J-Pop tracks I could do without, is quite good and on par with the rest of the franchise. Changes made going from the PS2 original and the HD version are minimal from a visual standpoint, but the game received additional content not previously available to western audiences. There are two new dress spheres, one of which is actually very useful, and a new monster capturing mechanic that actually expands the playable battle party. It wasn’t something I took advantage of, but it’s cool for those who want it.

The major addition to the game is the inclusion of The Last Mission scenario. The Last Mission takes place after the events of the main game and sees Yuna, Rikku, and Paine reunite for one final mission. It’s almost a completely different game as it’s basically a rogue-like, dungeon-crawler instead of a typical JRPG like the main game. I personally found it to be a real drag, and getting through it for the additional storyline content was not an enjoyable experience for me. The storyline was also pretty trivial and the lesson in it felt forced like it was coming from a completely different voice than from those behind X-2’s plot. I would suggest that if you do not enjoy the gameplay, as I did, then save yourself the time and just watch the cut scenes from it on youtube. They’re everywhere.

The Last Mission is a very different experience and one I didn't care for, but maybe I'm in the minority.

The Last Mission is a very different experience and one I didn’t care for, but maybe I’m in the minority.

The last piece of new content is the Bonus Audio which is being referred to as an audio drama on the internet. It’s basically a story that takes place after X-2 and centers on a new character (if you do not want spoilers, then skip ahead to the next paragraph). The new character is actually the daughter of Auron, and she wants to meet up with those who knew her father. To make a long-story short, the end result is that Yuna is once more a summoner for a Yevon-like organization, Sin returns, and she and Tidus break-up over some really silly stuff. I know some people did not like that Tidus died, or ceased to exist, at the conclusion of Final Fantasy X and the perfect ending of X-2 basically remedies this. I was fine and happy with how FFX concluded, not because I hated Tidus, but because I respected the story it told. I actually wish they never brought him back since I prefer death be treated as permanent in pretty much any story I experience. To bring him back though and then have Yuna break-up with him over some silly insecurities such as the ones presented in the audio drama just seemed like bad story-telling. I do not know if this audio was meant to be a spring-board for a Final Fantasy X-3, I doubt Square-Enix has any interest in going back to Spira, but if it was I hope they soundly rejected it. Listen to it only if you’re absolutely curious because the story sucks, to put it bluntly.

Final Fantasy X-2 is a perfectly acceptable Final Fantasy title, and a damn good game. I do not think it is better than Final Fantasy X and it’s not in my top five Final Fantasy titles, but it’s probably right in the middle somewhere. If you’re like me and either felt you short-changed it back when it was originally released or ignored it all together, I would suggest giving it another go. If you didn’t like Final Fantasy X then don’t bother, but if you loved Final Fantasy III and V because of the job system then maybe you should take a look regardless of your thoughts on Final Fantasy X. It’s a fun game and it stands out among other Final Fantasy titles, and given how many there are, that’s an accomplishment worth celebrating.

2 Comments   |  tags: , , , , , , , , | posted in Video Games

January 18, 2015

The WWE Network: The Review

By Joe

WWE-NetworkIt has been nearly a year since WWE launched its streaming, on-demand network and even longer since the company originally announced it. First conceived as a standard television channel, the WWE Network would go missing for the duration of 2012 and 2013 despite teases prior to that of a nearing launch. When it finally did make it to consumers it was as the on-demand network present today. Consumers are able to access the network, for a monthly fee, through various external devices such as gaming consoles, Roku, and smart TVs much like other on-demand networks such as Netflix and Hulu. Priced at $9.99 per month, the cost is right around the same as other similar networks but with the obvious difference being this one appeals solely to fans of professional wrestling. Are there enough fans of professional wrestling, and specifically WWE, to sustain a pay-per-month service?

That question has largely gone on unanswered since the Network’s launch in February 2014. I posted back then about my initial impressions and have kept my subscription active ever since, despite some early problems and a lack of original content. I am happy to say that the WWE Network has improved immensely in less than a year, but subscription numbers are reportedly still not where the company needs them to be in order to insure the long-term viability of the WWE Network.

The overall strategy of the WWE Network seems to be something along the lines of giving wrestling fans everything they could possibly want at a low monthly price. The WWE Network is loaded with content ranging from old editions of forgotten television shows such as Saturday Night Main Event to original documentaries of wrestling’s biggest stars. Each month, the WWE airs a pay-per-view event that is free to subscribers of the Network and there’s also new wrestling shows such as Superstars, Main Event, and NXT; WWE’s developmental show. Current episodes of WWE’s main cable programs, Raw and Smackdown, do not air live on the Network but many older editions are present. Joining them are old episodes of WCW Nitro and ECW Hardcore Television. And if that wasn’t enough, there’s also every single pay-per-view ever aired by the big three, along with lots of archival cards from the 70’s and 80’s before the wrestling television boom. Since there’s so much content to cover, I decided I would list out and elaborate on the biggest pros and cons of the service to give my own personal take on the WWE Network.

NXT

The NXT events have been light-years ahead of the WWE events.

The NXT events have been light-years ahead of the WWE events.

NXT used to air on cable but ever since the launch of the WWE Network it has become a network exclusive. When it was on television I never checked it out, but strong word-of-mouth and the ability to watch the programs whenever I want turned me on to the product and I couldn’t be more impressed with what I’ve seen. NXT is recorded in a small arena at Full Sail University in Florida. There’s a weekly, hour-long show as well as quarterly “event” shows that are structured like a typical WWE pay-per-view event. What makes NXT so special is its incredibly talented, focused, roster. The best workers in WWE right now are at NXT. Grapplers like Adrian Neville, Sami Zayn, and Charlotte are supremely gifted, dedicated, in-ring workers who are honing their craft right in front of our eyes. The women’s division is so strong it’s stunning given the quality of the “Divas” matches that take place on Raw. And even though each show is only an hour long, there’s probably still more time devoted to actual wrestling than what takes place on Raw, where three-minute matches are common-place and long-winded Authority-led promos often dominate the show. NXT is simply a breath of fresh air and each one of the “pay-per-views” it’s put on have been better than every WWE pay-per-view that aired in 2014. The only bad thing I can say about NXT is that it makes the main roster look like crap making it even harder to tune into Raw on a weekly basis.

Beyond the Ring

Beyond the Ring is the section of the WWE Network devoted to biographical programs often focused on one wrestler. These should be familiar to WWE fans who have ever purchased a DVD set on one of their favorite wrestlers as these biographies are first released through that medium. Buying every DVD put of by WWE would be both costly and cumbersome, so it’s pretty cool to have them all here on the Network. There’s also wrestlers and personalities I was interested in learning more about, but I wasn’t quite willing to throw down cash on a set. There’s no set amount of time in place between release and when a biography will show up on the Network, but there’s already a healthy mix of new releases (the newest being the Paul Heyman feature which first hit retail shelves last summer) and older ones. Some of the wrestlers featured thus far have been Stone Cold, Rock, John Cena, Roddy Piper, Brett Hart, the Road Warriors, and many more. There’s also some “countdown” style features (not to be confused with the Network show called Countdown) that look at the best wrestlers of the 2000’s or top finishing moves. For the most part, I’ve enjoyed each of the features I’ve watched (the only one I really didn’t care for was Brock Lesnar’s) and often I learned something I didn’t know before.

The Monday Night War

Consisting of twenty episodes, The Monday Night War has easily been the best original program put out by the WWE.

Consisting of twenty episodes, The Monday Night War has easily been the best original program put out by the WWE.

The Monday Night War is WWE’s anthology series focusing on the mid to late 90’s and the ratings battle that took place between WWF Raw is War and WCW Monday Nitro. Consisting of twenty one hour episodes, the series looked at the start of both shows, the key moments and players within the rivalry, and ultimately its conclusion. When the WWE Network was first unveiled, this show was one of the few mentioned and promoted and was a factor in my signing up. It didn’t arrive until the fall, but it has mostly proved worth the wait. Considering it’s rather tight focus, the show did repeat itself at times but as someone who experienced the phenomenon that was the Monday Night War in the 90’s I found it really entertaining to go back and re-examine it. One could potentially criticize the program for painting too flattering a picture of the WWE in comparison to WCW, but considering WCW really only competed for so long because of the nWo and Ted Turner’s checkbook, the show is probably fair. Narrated by Keith David, the presentation of the program is handled well despite having to rely on television footage from before the HD era. All of the major players one would expect receive their own featured episode including Bischoff, Austin, the nWo, Degeneration X, Rock, Mick Foley, and more. It’s just a shame the show had to end.

The Other Original Programs

NXT, the documentaries in the Beyond the Ring section, and The Monday Night War are all strong parts of the WWE Network. Unfortunately, the other original programming is somewhat lacking. The latest, and likely intended as a replacement for The Monday Night War, is WWE Rivalries which focuses on one historic rivalry in a documentary style program. The first episode focused on Austin and Vince McMahon and was extended to two-parts, each one being an hour. After already focusing on the rivalry in The Monday Night War, this one felt too familiar. Other rivalries, such as Edge and Christian vs The Hardys, just didn’t feel all that compelling. The show isn’t bad, but it needs to focus more on rivalries not already covered extensively elsewhere, which may be hard to pull off. “Reality” shows, like Total Divas and Legend’s House, are not my thing and have never been viewed by me. Countdown is an okay time-waster if you want to see current wrestlers list their favorite trash talkers, high-flyers, and so on. Legends of Wrestlemania is basically a one-hour show where a Wrestlemania match is highlighted and then shown. It’s not a bad way to pass the time, but considering every Wrestlemania is already included on the WWE Network it hardly feels necessary. The two other WWE roster programs, Main Event and Superstars, are just as bland as they were on cable. Nothing ever happens on these shows, but if you’re a big David Otunga fan, it’s probably the only place where you’ll see him compete.

The Pay-Per-Views and Current Television Product

Vince McMahon needs to make some changes if he wants to regain his reputation as a visionary in the world of professional wrestling, or sports entertainment, as he likes to call it.

Vince McMahon needs to make some changes if he wants to regain his reputation as a visionary in the world of professional wrestling, or sports entertainment, as he likes to call it.

Really, the WWE Network is actually pretty awesome. It has almost everything from wrestling’s past that a fan could possibly want as well as some pretty entertaining new shows to go along with it. And at ten bucks a month, with the original six-month required commitment now abolished, it’s pretty easy to talk yourself into subscribing, especially considering that the monthly pay-per-views are included. Unfortunately, it’s those events that are lacking the most, and in general, the current state of WWE programming. WWE Raw is a pretty bad show at this point. The storylines are stale, the main event talent too predictable, and the tone is just off. Which is frustrating, because the current roster, from an in-ring perspective, is quite possibly the most talented ever assembled by the WWE. It compares rather favorably to those early 90’s rosters that featured major up-and-comers like Shawn Michaels, Brett Hart, The Undertaker, and so many more. I love watching Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins, Cesaro, and Bray Wyatt work a match, it’s just that they aren’t always allowed to work a compelling one. The Divas division and tag team division are bad, and there’s little importance placed on the mid-card belts. This has lead to pay-per-view cards that are just plain boring, and WWE’s reliance on The Authority angle, where a heel personality (in this case, Triple H and his wife Stephanie) are in control and make life miserable in an illogical way for the “good guys”, is just plain boring. Everything has a “been there, done that” feel to it, and I often can’t stomach more than a few minutes of Raw before I inevitably switch-over to whatever Simpsons marathon is airing on FXX. The only pay-per-view event from 2014 I truly enjoyed was Wrestlemania XXX. If I had spent the fifty bucks or whatever the cable rate is for any of the other pay-per-view events in 2014 I would have been furious.

The WWE is at an odd place right now with its network. The company is coming up on one of its biggest events of the year, The Royal Rumble, and also planning on airing its annual Hall of Fame induction ceremony exclusively on the WWE Network. And there’s also Wrestlemania XXXI to think about in March. Right now, there’s enough content on the WWE Network that focuses on the past to keep me entertained, but I wonder how willing I’ll be to keep it once that content drys up. The Network does such a good job of high-lighting the glory days, specifically the Attitude Era, that it really harms the current PG Era by shining a light on just how bad it’s become. The Monday Night Wars program was very thorough in pointing out how silly and cartoony the WWF was in the mid-nineties before turning things around with a bold, new approach. Only the most ardent supporters of Vince McMahon would be unable to draw parallels between the WWF of the mid-nineties and the WWE of today. Sadly, McMahon had a sit-down with Stone Cold Steve Austin as part of a WWE Network exclusive in which he seemed to suggest that everything was great, and no one was worthy of a “promotion” to main event status(even singling out current superstar Cesaro, as being someone he was particularly down on despite most fans raving about him), demonstrating just how out of touch he is with the WWE audience. So long as he’s running the show, it’s hard to imagine things getting better.

1 Comment   |  tags: , , , , , , , , , , | posted in Sports, Television

January 4, 2015

Angry Video Game Nerd: The Movie

By Joe
Angry Video Game Nerd: The Movie (2014)

Angry Video Game Nerd: The Movie (2014)

For over ten years, James Rolfe’s Angry Video Game Nerd character has been entertaining viewers with humor-laden rants on “classic” video games and movies via that amazing thing known as the internet. The videos first appeared on his own website before migrating to Youtube where they gained a following that seems to still be growing. Today, the videos are contained and published on Rolfe’s own website, cinemassacre.com, along with his other films and humor shorts. Over the years Rolfe has added other characters to his stable including Board James and the Bullshit Man, but it’s the Nerd who is easily the most popular of them all.

The Nerd videos successfully tap into nostalgia by invoking memories of frustrating evenings spent with a terrible game just rented from the local video store. Everyone who grew up in the 80’s and 90’s who played video games can probably recall a few bad decisions that lead to tossed controllers or broken toys. For most kids of that era, picking a game at the rental store was like tossing darts. You could judge them only on so little. Some games would print screenshots on the back of the box while some would force you to go off of the cover art alone, which was often purposely misleading. I know I personally encountered many duds, usually selecting a game based on a license I was familiar with through television or film. That’s how I ended up getting stuck with Road Runner on the NES for a weekend. If you’ve never played Road Runner on the NES consider yourself lucky. Watching someone else slog through these games has proven to be entertaining, and Rolfe is able to blend in other elements to keep things fresh and entertaining. What once were simply clips of gameplay with cuts to the Nerd’s reactions have grown into elaborate skits and battles to the death with the likes of Bugs Bunny and R.O.B.

James Rolfe is the Angry Video Game Nerd; a beer-swilling, profanity-spewing, victim of bad games.

James Rolfe is the Angry Video Game Nerd; a beer-swilling, profanity-spewing, victim of bad games.

As the years have gone one, it has become harder to find games worthy of the Nerd’s time. One game though has been saved, the infamous E.T. for the Atari 2600, which is the so-called worst game ever. This was a game Rolfe and his friend and collaborator Kevin Finn decided could not be confined to the usual ten minute internet video and instead announced that they were pursuing a feature-length film for the Nerd. They attempted to get backing from actual production studios based in Hollywood, but when that didn’t work, they turned to crowd-funding and were able to come away with enough cash to make the film a reality. It took a long time for the movie to be filmed, edited, and eventually released, but hopefully the wait was worth it for those involved and those who were eager to see it.

When it was announced this summer that Angry Video Game Nerd: The Movie would receive a limited theatrical release, I was on my honeymoon, and as a result, missed out on the ticket pre-sale. The film was released digitally in the fall, but I opted to just wait for the Blu Ray which arrived the week before Christmas at my residence. As a fan of the web series, I was intrigued at how Rolfe and company would turn a ten minute video into a feature-length film. Would the Nerd prove interesting enough a character to command my attention for nearly two hours? And how would the production come across given the budget?

Well, I would say that, for the most part, the film works. The premise of the film is that everyone and their grandmother wants the Nerd to review E.T. (known as Eee Tee in the movie for obvious reasons), but because he has such bad memories of the game from his childhood, the Nerd refuses. A video game company, Cockburn Industries, takes note of the Nerd’s popularity and how his videos have actually lead to a demand for the bad games he reviews. They decide to green-light a sequel to Eee Tee and get the Nerd to review it, at which point he’ll condemn it and people will buy it. Cockburn sends one of their executives, Mandi (played by Sarah GlennDanzig, I mean, Sarah Glendening) to befriend the Nerd and his associate, Cooper (Jeremy Suarez), and get the Nerd to agree to a review. She poses as a nerd herself, and by getting Cooper and the Nerd to make a friendly wager over whether or not the Atari landfill story is true or not, finds a way to get the Nerd to agree to a review. She organizes a search team to scope out the landfill area in New Mexico, while those involved soon find themselves attracting the attention of a military group charged with protecting the secret of Area 51, which is located nearby. It’s all pretty crazy, but essentially the Nerd and his friends spend time illuding these military types and getting caught in a massive conspiracy theory surrounding the game and its ties to the existence extraterrestrial life. There are aliens, a massive god-like monster being, and even Howard Scott Warshaw himself (the creator of the actual E.T. 2600 game), along with a whole bunch of other stuff I’d rather not spoil.

Some of the actors joining Rolfe include (clockwise from top right) Time Winters, Sarah Glendening, and Jeremy Suarez.

Some of the actors joining Rolfe include (clockwise from top right) Time Winters, Sarah Glendening, and Jeremy Suarez.

The plot of the film is supposed to be “out there” with purposely telegraphed twists and over-the-top characters. The villainous General Dark Onward (Stephen Mendel) is especially creative as he’s a paraplegic with a tank for a lower body who has a penchant for losing limbs. Time Winters is entertaining playing the required illusive genius who clues the group in on the secret of Eee Tee while Helena Barrett plays a capable right-hand woman to Dark Onwardby the name of McButters. The actors are mostly veterans of small productions like soap operas and commercials who mostly handle themselves well. The script they’re given is full of silly, corny, lines that they sell well. One of my concerns going into the film was how Rolfe would stand-up amongst professional actors. Any concerns I had were remedied early on as Rolfe clearly knows how to both write for his venerable character and how to portray him. If there’s a weakness in the script, it’s with the Mandi character and McButter. Perhaps not accustomed to writing dialogue for women, Rolfe and Finn’s script for the two aims for cheese but often misses the mark. Their cat-fight scene meant to induce laughter instead brings about groans.

General Dark Onward is probably the most ambitious character in the film.

General Dark Onward is probably the most ambitious character in the film.

The production is noticeably done on the cheap, but it doesn’t limit the film’s scope or imagination which is all that matters. There are lots of easter eggs buried in both the plot devices and the way certain effects are handled (including an obvious homage to one of the worst films of the 1990’s, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III). Rolfe opted primarily for practical effects in lieu of computer generated ones. The films makes frequent use of miniatures, which aren’t really designed to trick the viewer, but are instead meant to amuse. Some of them are quite spectacular and I found it enjoyable watching these scenes and trying to imagine what the crew went through bringing them to life. There are some computer effects, like a Mario inspired lava sequence, and they impressed me in their scope. The soundtrack was handled by Bear McCreary, whom fans of The Walking Dead should recognize. His score makes liberal use of video game sound effects from that era as well as the Angry Video Game Nerd theme song by Kyle Justin. It’s the film’s strongest point, and while not the type of soundtrack I’d seek out, it perfectly suits the film and enhances the viewing experience.

Angry Video Game Nerd: The Movie should satisfy fans of the Nerd and gaming culture alike. It’s also clearly a love-letter to classic sci-fi and adventure pictures and the influences of films like Raiders of the Lost Arc and Godzilla are easy to spot. The plot is large and as captivating as a film based on the Angry Video Game Nerd could possibly be. If I had one last nitpick with the movie it’s that the Nerd doesn’t get enough of an opportunity to really get angry, but I suppose it was necessary to present a slightly more humanized version of the character in order to get it to work on film. I enjoyed the movie, and the loads of bonus content contained on the Blu Ray gave me something fun and interesting to check out after the film was over. Watching an independent film come to life is a rewarding experience. The film obviously means a great deal to those involved with it and their enthusiasm is contagious. This is a film that would be hard to hate, so it’s a good thing it turned out as well as it did.

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December 24, 2014

Christmas Commercialism

By Joe

hqdefaultChristmas and commercialism; the two go hand-in-hand. For what is Christmas without it? Just another day off. Oh, and apparently there’s some religious thing going on too, or something. Cynical? Sure, but this is the world we live in and have lived in for decades. It’s been almost fifty years since A Charlie Brown Christmas first aired on television lambasting the commercial aspect of Christmas. Which is funny, because I’m pretty sure the Hallmark Store down the street had an entire section of its shelves devoted to Peanuts Christmas memorabilia this year. Don’t bite the hand, Chuck.

I’ve made lots of posts about Christmas films and television specials, so why not a post about Christmas commercials? I’m not going to kid anyone and say my life has been enriched by any commercials, but I do get a little uptick in my mood when Christmas commercials show up on television. Sure, the vast majority of them will be annoying and overplayed come the 25th but a select few are able to buck that trend. And while I’d never rank a good Christmas commercial alongside a good holiday special, it does surprise me sometimes when I realize how many of these things still remain in my brain years later. It helps that I spent a huge chunk of my childhood re-watching the same VHS tape full of television specials and commercials each holiday season (and adulthood, since I have it on right now).

Advertisements are supposed to pitch a product, naturally, and convince those who view it to go out and purchase said product. Considering the biggest custom surrounding Christmas is giving gifts, it makes a lot of sense why it’s become such a giant commercial. And since it also tends to invoke warm, happy, feelings, it makes sense for all advertisers to try and tap into that. If an advertiser can successfully create an emotional attachment to its product then that’s going to go a long way towards making that product stick out when it comes time for shopping. Let’s take a look at a few that stand out as being pretty “Christmassy” from past years (apologies for when the youtube links inevitably break, if you’re reading this long after it was originally posted).

Oreo

Who comes down the chimney to deliver presents on Christmas Eve? Santa. And what do kids leave as a “thank you” for Santa? Cookies. It makes quite a bit of sense for cookie makers to come out and tap into that for a commercial, so that’s what Nabisco did with this Oreo cookie commercial from the 1980’s. Another seemingly full-proof advertising strategy is to craft a catchy jingle. That sort of thing likely predates radio and television by decades, if not centuries. Just take a minute and think about how many commercial jingles you can recall easily. I bet tons of people in New England can still remember the New England Telephone commercial jingle, and that company has been dead for decades. Oreo had a catchy jingle for a long time (and maybe they still do) that drew attention to the habit of dunking the cookie in milk and drawing parallels to being a child. It’s a pretty effective ploy. It was also an adaptable jingle as words could be substituted to change things up and have it relate to something else, like Christmas. In this commercial we have little Alex trying to stay up on Christmas Eve to catch Santa. Of course, he can’t keep his eyes open and when Santa comes down that chimney he’s delighted to find a plate of Oreos. Before Alex can wake, Santa is gone but he left a little note. It’s a cute commercial, and it’s likely the jingle that makes it stick out for me.

McDonald’s – “Star Wish”

Fast food doesn’t exactly bring about the holiday spirit, but considering fast food retailers often include toys in their kid’s meals, it makes sense for one to show up here. This commercial from McDonald’s though is fairly unique. It’s not pitching an actual product such as a food item or Happy Meal toy. It’s basically just a short little Christmas story that serves as a video Christmas card of sorts. Today with all of the negative press surrounding fast food and how unhealthy it is, it seems like a strategy that might be worth revisiting. In 1987 though, I don’t think the stigma was as strong. Instead this is probably McDonald’s wanting to push its characters that appeal to kids to create further good will with them. The short stars Ronald McDonald, Birdy, and Grimace, all characters that I believe have been deemphasized by the corporation in recent years. Society has basically decided it’s kind of shitty for fast food retailers to push their unhealthy food on children so these characters may be foreign to today’s kids (I would think they still know who Ronald McDonald is, but I’m not positive), but in the 80’s and early 90’s they were quite prevalent on television. The short features Birdy and Grimace looking for a gift for Ronald, and happen to stumble upon a falling star. They put the obviously alive little bugger in a box (since he came from space he probably doesn’t require oxygen to live, so we can excuse the lack of air holes, I suppose) and give him to Ronald. Ronald sees this amazing thing in a box and rightly decides he shouldn’t enslave it so they send him home. The star, who exists as a hand-drawn animated character, actually interacts pretty well with the real characters in the commercial and the set is far too good than it has any right being. McDonald’s spent some money.

Fruity Pebbles

I don’t know why, but it seems many advertisers decided the best way to market cereal was to have one character possess the cereal and another desperately seek it. There were the kids trying to get Lucky Charms, the Trixx rabbit, and the Cookie Crisp crook, to name a few. Another was Barney Rubble of Flintstones fame always trying to get Fred’s Fruity and Coco Pebbles cereal. It’s kind of bizarre as there’s really nothing about the Barney character that suggests he should obsess over cereal. It’s also kind of funny that the Flintstones are used to market food items and vitamins long after their day in the sun has set. This Christmas commercial stands out for me. I don’t know why, but it probably has something to do with Barney actually getting to have some Fruity Pebbles. I can’t think of a time when the Trixx rabbit actually got to enjoy a bowl of Trixx. I think most kids always wanted these characters to just get some cereal. And in the case of Fruity Pebbles, maybe Barney would finally see that what he’s been chasing is actually pretty terrible and he could move on with his life. So even though this commercial is memorable for me, it never made me want to eat this cereal since I knew it was awful. Who knows, though? Maybe I saw it so often each year that it convinced me to beg my mom to pick up a box just so I could be reminded that I didn’t actually enjoy it. I also find it alarming how effective a job this commercial did at staying with me as I can recite the damn thing word for word. Brainwashing at its finest.

 

It’s Christmas Eve, so this likely ends the Christmas posts of 2014. I hope you enjoyed them.

Merry Christmas!

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December 19, 2014

Beavis and Butt-Head Do Christmas

By Joe
Beavis and Butt-head Do Christmas (1995)

Beavis and Butt-head Do Christmas (1995)

Last year, I posted about the many Christmas specials featured in the animated series South Park. Well, before South Park came Beavis and Butt-head: the subversive, moronic duo who entertained millions during the 1990s on MTV. Created by Mike Judge, who’s now probably more famous for King of the Hill and Office Space, Beavis and Butt-head were basically a rip on the MTV generation. They were dim, violence obsessed, and wasted away their lives in front of the television watching music videos and eating nachos. Despite the fact that the two were clearly presented as losers on their own show, kids liked to emulate them and if the duo approved of a band or video on MTV it offered a credibility boost to said band. Every rock and metal act wanted to be endorsed by Beavis and Butt-head, because it’s what the kids were into at the time.

Beavis and Butt-head embrace the holiday spirit. Kind of.

Beavis and Butt-head embrace the holiday spirit. Kind of.

Beavis and Butt-head first debuted with “Frog Baseball” on MTV’s Liquid Television block. It was so successful that it was spun-off into its own show which ran from 1993 until 1997 with a brief one season return in 2011. Along the way there was also a feature-length movie, television specials, and a spin-off called Daria. A few years ago, I made an entry of what I considered essential Christmas viewing and among the many movies and specials was Beavis and Butt-head Do Christmas. Well here’s a full write-up on the special from 1995.

Beavis and Butt-Head Do Christmas refers to two shorts with other holiday content woven in. Do Christmas has been released on DVD and VHS though is likely out of print at this point. The two shorts are parodies of classic Christmas stories/movies that should be obvious just by reading the titles of the two cartoons: “Huh-Huh Humbug” and “It’s a Miserable Life.” First stars Beavis and the second Butt-head and are roughly 12 minutes a piece. This was one of the few episodes of Beavis and Butt-head that didn’t have any music videos (a prior Christmas special for the show featured nothing but the two riffing on Christmas videos) but is still pretty hilarious, nonetheless.

In "Huh-Huh-Humbug," Beavis just wants to enjoy a porno but various ghost won't let him.

In “Huh-Huh-Humbug,” Beavis just wants to enjoy a porno but various ghost won’t let him.

“Huh-Huh-Humbug” puts Beavis in the role of Scrooge only he’s more of an idealized version Beavis sees of himself as opposed to a truly financially successful human being. The cartoon opens with Beavis squishing a rat on the grill at Burger World on Christmas when his boss comes over to admonish him for his lack of ambition and to brag about his position of assistant manager of a fast food restaurant. Beavis soon falls asleep on the job and dreams he is the manager of Burger World who gets to boss around Butt-head and Principal McVicker and make them work on Christmas while he goes home to watch a porno and jerk-off. When Beavis settles in to watch his porno, the various ghosts from A Christmas Carol start interrupting him beginning with Butt-head playing the role of Marley. The other ghosts admonish Beavis and point out how awful he treats McVickers, to which Beavis shows no empathy. He even disagrees with the Ghost of Christmas Yet-to-Come’s version of the future, instead choosing to imagine himself as a Terminator-like robot laying waste to the customers of Burger World.

A horrible future, indeed.

A horrible future, indeed.

The cartoon works because there’s no attempt to show one worthwhile quality within Beavis. He’s a selfish, stupid, person who is incapable of any kind of empathy. To add to the humor, there’s a lot of one-liners and the porno Beavis watches (also a parody of A Christmas Carol) is a great source for gags.

The second cartoon, “It’s a Miserable Life” stars Butt-head, but like the prior one, still features plenty of Beavis too. The twist on this parody is that the guardian angel for Beavis and Butt-head is sent to kill the two after God received numerous requests to make them disappear. The Clarence character here first tries to simply kill the two by freezing a bridge they’re walking on in hopes the two will slip and fall to their deaths. When that fails, he opts to show Butt-head what the world would be like if he never existed and how much better off people would be. Naturally, without Butt-head everyone is a lot happier and more successful. Bevies, in particular, is best friends with the dorky Stuart and volunteers at the soup kitchen on Christmas. After seeing all of this, Butt-head just gets pissed off and he and Beavis just determine that the world sucks, but would suck even more without them. The guardian angel tries to kill them again, but just ends up killing himself by accident.

Once again, the cartoon works by not resorting to any kind of Christmas sentimentality at all. Butt-head is portrayed as a parasite on society who refuses to embrace anything remotely “good.” It’s amusing to see the Butt-head-less world, but it’s more amusing to see Butt-head’s reaction to it. “Huh-Huh-Humbug” is probably my favorite of the two, but they’re both entertaining and pretty much for the same reasons.

Butt-head's guardian angel isn't here to help him, he's here to kill him.

Butt-head’s guardian angel isn’t here to help him, he’s here to kill him.

In between the specials we’re also tested to the Ask Santa Butt-head segments and a scene of a burning Yule log that the two riff over in place of music videos. The Santa Butt-head segments feature the duo playing Santa and reindeer, with Butt-head as Santa and Beavis the reindeer. Butt-head reads fan letters, with most of them being from women who want to have carnal relations with Beavis. Butt-head doesn’t understand this and refuses to give Beavis the letters. Since he’s roped up to the sleigh in his reindeer costume, there’s little he can do about it. When a letter-writer requests Butt-head kick Beavis’ ass, he’s happy to oblige by whipping the day-lights out of him. These segments are brief but do bring about a good amount of laughs with the two staying true to their characters even while playing other characters.

Beavis and Butt-head Do Christmas is not your typical holiday special. There’s no holiday cheer, unless you consider any amount of laughter brought on by a Christmas special a form of holiday cheer. It’s mean-spirited, low-brow, but also full of good satire that will make most people who remember the 90’s laugh often and frequently. Beavis and Butt-head are dumb, but the humor really isn’t which some people failed to “get.” I’ve always felt they were underrated in that regard, and perhaps South Park would end up better combining toilet humor with biting satire, but it doesn’t diminish what Mike Judge did with Beavis and Butt-head beforehand.

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December 14, 2014

Home Alone 2: Lost in New York

By Joe
Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (1992)

Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (1992)

Home Alone, the John Hughes produced and Christopher Columbus directed film that dominated the holiday season of 1990, demanded a sequel. The film starred ten-year old Macaulay Culkin as Kevin McCallister, who was eight according to the film’s script. Considering the star was already two years older than the character he was playing, and getting older every day, a sequel had to be written, produced, and filmed rather quickly. The problem, of course, is that Home Alone is the sort of movie that really shouldn’t have a sequel, but given the economics of film-making, it was going to have to make do with one.

A friend of mine and I had a disagreement over the Home Alone series. I consider the original a Christmas Classic. It’s not a perfect movie, by any means, but it is entertaining and I enjoy my annual viewings almost as much now as I did when I was young. As for the sequel, well, I’ve never had much love for it. Even when I saw it in the theater as a kid I knew what it was:  a cash-grab, carbon-copy of the original. I never saw much use for it after that initial viewing. My friend, on the other hand, considers the sequel the superior film (we both consider the franchise concluded with Home Alone 2) which I strongly disagreed with. Having not really spent much time with it over the years, I wasn’t well-equipped to defend my position. When browsing the Christmas section at a local store, I happened upon the Home Alone and Home Alone 2 Blu Ray combo-pack and decided now would be a good time to revisit this film and either reaffirm my position or discover a new holiday favorite.

Kevin is back to make the adults of New York look like fools.

Kevin is back to make the adults of New York look like fools.

As I mentioned in the intro, the writers for Home Alone 2 were being put in a tough spot. The plot for Home Alone, of a family rushing off on a vacation to Paris forgets their son at home, is ridiculous on the surface but presented in a way that makes it believable enough for a comedy. Now what isn’t easy is convincing an audience that it could happen again. To forget one’s child at home is a pretty serious infraction. Most of us would jump to conclusions and suggest that anyone who did that is not fit to be a parent, but as I said, the first film does a well-enough job convincing us that the McCallisters aren’t the worst parents in the world. If they were to forget young Kevin again though…

Home Alone 2:  Lost in New York takes Kevin out of the home and drops him in New York City. Leaving him at home again was out of the question, so a new location had to be picked. And in order for Kevin to be left behind once again, a new variation had to be found.

How does Kevin wind up in New York? Well, let’s start from the beginning. Pretty much everyone who worked on the first film returned for the sequel including the cast, writers, and other talents that made the first film such a huge success. And once again, the McCallisters and their extended family are preparing to head out on vacation for the holidays. It’s been one year since the events of the first film and everyone is in Chicago to spend the night before flying off to Miami in the morning. Before the family can take off though, they have to attend a Christmas recital that Kevin and Buzz are both singing in. When Buzz, standing behind Kevin onstage, acts out during Kevin’s solo the younger McCallister is embarrassed and slugs his older brother in response, which somehow collapses the scaffolding on the stage. Back at home, both boys are expected to apologize to the family and make-up before everyone can go to bed and rest-up for the morning. Kevin, feeling that he’s done nothing wrong, refuses to apologize and insists he’s still being dumped on by the family. He and his mother exchange words, and everyone goes to bed angry with one another.

Of course, these guys are back too and somehow bump into Kevin in the middle of the city.

Of course, these guys are back too and somehow bump into Kevin in the middle of the city.

This, of course, is basically how the first film started with only minor modifications and everything here is presented worse than it was in the prior film. Kevin is angry, and rightfully so. In the first film we could see that he’s kind of a pain in the ass and could understand the family’s position. Here it’s just stupid. Buzz’s actions during the recital get a huge reaction from the crowd, and even Uncle Frank concludes they were “pretty god-damned hilarious,” which is just over the top. It’s not that funny, and no reasonable person would be angry with Kevin, and it makes me feel like my intelligence is being insulted. Also of annoyance to me, is the fact that Kevin is ten years old in this film, despite it only being a year after the events of the first movie when Kevin was eight. Now, normally this wouldn’t be that big of a deal but in both movies Kevin makes it a point to remind people how old he is on multiple occasions. Why didn’t they just make him nine? It just bothers me. And Kevin and his mom’s conversation prior to him going to bed is so similar to the first movie it hardly seems worth having. He even wishes to have a vacation without his family and she basically challenges him to make it happen, like she did in the first film when he said he didn’t want to see her again for the rest of his life. Does no one in this family learn anything?!

The setup of the movie is lazy at best, awful at worst, but it’s not going to make or break the film. So how does Kevin wind-up in New York? He gets separated from his family at the airport while fishing through his dad’s carry-on for batteries for his Talkboy (in stores this holiday season!) and then mistakes another man in the same coat as his dad for his dad. Like the first movie, it’s a mad dash to the gate for the family to make the flight so they lose track of Kevin. They get on the correct flight, but Kevin winds up on a flight to New York thanks to a collision with a worker at the terminal. Kevin, who seems like a smart and crafty young boy, gets on the plane and never notices that his rather large family is missing. Meanwhile, no one on the correct flight thinks to double-check and make sure Kevin is there. Considering this has happened before, why wouldn’t they?! Instead, it’s not noticed until the family is at baggage claim.

Meanwhile, Kevin checks into a fancy hotel in New York quite happy to have ditched his family. He makes fools of the adults running the hotel, and thanks to the large amount of cash in his dad’s luggage, has no trouble seeing the sights and having fun. Unfortunately, the Wet Bandits are in New York too, and somehow in a city of millions end up running into Kevin. Marv is quite eager to tell anyone their new master plan of knocking off a toy store on Christmas Eve, and Kevin decides it’s up to him to stop them (apparently the police can’t be trusted) by luring them to his uncle’s vacant house full of booby traps.

They should probably be dead at this point.

They should probably be dead at this point.

What does this movie get right? Not much, I’m afraid. I’ve already expressed my displeasure in the ridiculous setup but I can say the film does improve once Kevin is in New York. This is where the writers actually do a decent job of making Kevin’s actions believable. As he did in the first film, he takes advantage of adults who just think of him as a kid and is able to utilize his VCR and Talkboy in ways that trick adults into thinking they’re being scolded or even shot at. It is just as far-fetched as anything else, but feels smarter and does produce laughs. The main event, so to speak, is Kevin’s repeat encounter with the burglars from the first film. Here the writers are challenged to top what they did in the first film and the director is expected to make the visuals stand-up. Unfortunately, their attempts to top the first end up being just as lazy as the first scenes. Variations of the paint can, blow torch, and other gags are repeated. A few new ones are added, but few are all that memorable. Instead they end up being more absurd. While the damage sustained by the two in the first film certainly would have resulted in lasting damage, many of the traps in this one would have ended in death. Of course they don’t, but they’re certainly harder to believe.

When a sequel is so similar to the movie it's following you look for any difference between the two, like Fuller's new affinity for Coke instead of Pepsi.

When a sequel is so similar to the movie it’s following you look for any difference between the two, like Fuller’s new affinity for Coke instead of Pepsi.

There’s also a B story at play, much like Kevin’s encounter with his elderly neighbor in the first film, only now it’s with a homeless pigeon lady in the park. It’s very derivative of the first, though I will say the acting of Brenda Fricker is not the reason why. Which brings up a larger point of contention that I have with this film:  the acting. If I’m going to accuse the writers of being lazy with this film I could certainly say the same of the actors and actresses present as well. The established ones seem to just phone it in or ham it up. Macaulay Culkin is pretty terrible, especially in the early scenes of the film. The actors aren’t presented with great material to work with, but they still don’t exactly step up to the plate. At least the John Williams score is still good.

In conclusion, I cannot agree with my friend that Home Alone 2 is superior to the original Home Alone. Everything about it feels too familiar and the gags just aren’t as funny the second time around. There’s nothing plausible about it and the only reason the film exists is because it had to. It was a major box office success, not on the level of the first but it still basically printed money. And that’s really all the film was supposed to do. I’m sure everyone working on it expected it to be worse than the first but were happy to take home some nice checks. Watch this one only if you’ve seen the first one too many times and just need something else to watch. Even after you do, you’ll likely end up wishing you just watched Home Alone instead.

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