This is the story about a boy who just wanted to be loved.
Last week, we talked about two out of left field choices by Super7 for its line of action figures based on The Simpsons. This week, we’re discussing a fan favorite character that belongs and his inclusion is only perplexing given that there is no member of the Simpson family in the wave. Ralph Wiggum was featured in the very first episode of The Simpsons, but as a character, he wasn’t really developed until Season Four’s “I Love Lisa.” Up until that point, he was just some kid who was a little heavy-set, but made little impression. “I Love Lisa” made Ralph the character he is today. He’s more than a little slow, but genuine, and very impressionable. Unfortunately, he gets bad advice from his dad, the chief of police, which basically sets him up to have his heart broken by Lisa, but it all turns out well in the end. It’s not my favorite episode of The Simpsons, but it is one I adore and there are few episodes I’ve watched more than that one.
He wants to be loved, but not touched.
As an action figure, Ralph is a bit of a hard sell. The character is certainly beloved and not particularly difficult to translate to 3D, but it’s not one that presents a lot of opportunity for articulation or flashy paints. And since Super7’s Ultimates! line carries a base price of $55, Ralph is especially tough to value as he’s the same price as Homer, Moe, Krusty, and up to this point basically everyone except the massive Kang and Kodos. Super7 is one of those companies that has no problems asking its consumers to pay more for bigger characters, but never do they charge less for the small. And with Ralph, it’s hard to argue that Super7 has done much of anything to alleviate that.
The height of Ralph seems fine when compared with Bartman, but the rest? Eh, no.
Ralph stands at approximately 4.25″, probably a tick under. He’s just a little shorter than Bartman, which is proper for true scale, though his larger proportions make him look odd beside Bart. Ralph’s height is fine, but the rest isn’t really in scale. Unfortunately for Super7, there’s an entire episode about Bart and Ralph being paired up so there’s no shortage of reference images. Ralph’s hands and feet are gargantuan in comparison to Bart’s and the two do not look good side-by-side. I think this is a case of Super7 just not wanting to go smaller on Ralph than they did because then the asking price would look even more foolish. A lot of action figure lines tend to add a little to the smallest characters, and take a little from the largest to try to find a happy medium and I do think that’s true here. How much it bothers collectors is likely to vary from person-to-person, it’s just a shame the line ended up being a brief one because there’s really no one to pair Ralph with on the shelf if not Bartman. I guess he always was a bit of a loner.
Even with the adults his proportions just seem too big. His feet are bigger than Moe’s.
Aside from the scale, the sculpt on Ralph is fine. He has his almost blank expression where he’s smiling and it’s captured. He has his blue shirt and brown pants and basically the only paint is reserved for the eyes, shirt, and belt. His head does not appear to be painted yellow and instead Super7 just went with a matte coat. It’s a step back from the paint jobs we saw in the second wave of the line and I’m curious if these final two waves (which shipped at the same time and only a few weeks after the second) were rushed or had cuts made to them since Disney was pulling the license. The paint on the blue shirt is applied all right, but there are some blemishes. It also chips and flakes around where the arms plug into the shoulders leaving behind ugly, yellow, spots. By far though, my least favorite thing about the presentation of the figure is how Super7 did Ralph’s hair. Ralph has this very thin, wispy, hair in the show and Super7 opted to sculpt it in soft, black, plastic and glue it to his head. The end result is it’s just far too thick and he almost looks like he has dreadlocks. I think the proper way to do the hair would have been to sculpt it into his head and just paint it. Or do it with with something thinner, like the bristles you might find on a brush. This choice doesn’t work very well. You can especially see it in the reference art on the box how the diameter of his hair should be smaller than his pupils, but with the figure it’s the opposite.
At least it covers up the awful hair.
There isn’t much to say about Ralph’s articulation. It’s terrible. He’s barely better than a ReAction figure. The head just rotates and so do the shoulders. His elbows have little range as do the hinges in his hands. He has a waist twist, and everything below that is essentially useless. I don’t know what they were trying to do with the ankles as there’s basically a brown post that goes into his feet. There is a hinge, but it does almost nothing. There’s a gap between the end of his pants and shoes as a result and it looks bad. Ralph was never going to have terrific range at these joints, but it’s like they didn’t even try.
The only accessory you need?
A little statue like Ralph is relying on accessories to create value. I often get the sense with Super7 that they start at the $55 price and then try to add enough stuff to hit their cost target. With Ralph, I don’t really get that sense and instead this figure feels like a cost-saving one. The most popular character in the line that will probably sell the best so let’s produce it cheaply and maximize profit! Ralph has no extra hands and one extra head. That head is exactly the same as the default one, except it has a melted ice cream cone glued to the forehead. That’s it. The heads are really hard to swap too and I can’t see myself ever wanting to use this reference from a later episode that’s also a dated joke that hasn’t aged well. Why no toothy grin? Or better yet, a grin with red crayon all over the teeth? This is just bad.
“Go banana!”
Ralph’s other accessories include a banana, jar of paste, Valentine, sign, and computer. The banana and jar of paste have hands sculpted to them which I guess is fine. The jar has a removable top with paste at the end of a brush inside it, but Ralph’s range of motion is so terrible he can’t hold it with the top on. The Valentine is what you would expect and features the “I Choo-Choo-Choose You” remark and there’s a picture of a train. It’s great for what it is and if it wasn’t included there would be riots. There is a “WARNING DO NOT HUG” sign that can be hung around Ralph’s neck which, again, is from a much later episode. I would have preferred his Idaho costume instead. The sign is all plastic so it doesn’t even hang properly and looks stupid. The computer is an old, boxy, design and Ralph is practicing spelling “CAT” on it and there’s a picture of a cat. It too is from a post golden age episode, but at least it’s the Super Nintendo Chalmers scene so I’ll allow it, but there isn’t really anything for Ralph to do with it. He can’t hold it and he doesn’t have a desk to put it on. It just sits there.
“Miss Hoover! I’m all out of ice cream!”
For such an iconic character, Ralph’s accessories are severely underwhelming. And considering how small he is and that he has just one alternate head, he should have more. Where is his key to the town? Where’s the leprechaun that tells him to start fires? He could have had soft goods and another head to recreate his George Washington costume. He could have had his TV dinner he needs someone to microwave for him or his box of Star Wars collectibles. What about the cat he likes talking about so much? A box of crayons with a missing red crayon? There’s just so much! Obviously, Super7 could not have given us everything, but it’s like they tried to impress us with deeper cuts from later in the show’s life when they would have been better served to just focus on “I Love Lisa” and deliver as much from that episode as possible like a facial expression from the exact moment his heart rips in two.
If you’re a fan of The Simpsons and collecting this line, should you get Ralph Wiggum? I mean, as a character, of course. He’s probably the most popular character in the wave. As an action figure that costs $55? Absolutely not. Super7 did not earn your money with this release. The paint is mediocre, the sculpt is too large, the articulation is practically non-existent and the accessories uninspired. This is a dud of a release. Yeah, mixed in on your shelf with the rest of the line (provided he’s not next to Bartman) Ralph will look okay, but no one is likely to see it and go “Oh wow! I love that Ralph!” If I wasn’t going all-in on this line as a show of support so it would go on for awhile (oops), I would have passed or at least cancelled my preorder when Super7 figures started routinely hitting the discount rack. I suggest anyone who does have an interest in Ralph to just wait for such an event.
We are onto the third wave of Ultimates! from Super7 based on The Simpsons. Like past waves, plenty of questions abound when it comes to Super7’s character selection and they’re not unfounded. Perhaps the two most questionable inclusions in this third wave are the subject of today’s post: Kang and Kodos. These are two separate…
If you’ve been following along with my reviews on the second wave of Super7’s The Simpsons Ultimates!, then you will have noted that I’ve had a bit of a love/hate relationship with this wave. For the most part, the sculpts and deco have been on point, it’s some of the little things that have been…
If you’re going to market action figures to a fanbase as venerable as The Simpsons, you should probably go after what they love most. Simpsons fans love to make references to their favorite episodes and characters and one of the top episodes from the show is “You Only Move Twice” from the show’s seventh season.…
We are onto the third wave of Ultimates! from Super7 based on The Simpsons. Like past waves, plenty of questions abound when it comes to Super7’s character selection and they’re not unfounded. Perhaps the two most questionable inclusions in this third wave are the subject of today’s post: Kang and Kodos. These are two separate releases, but since the figures are practically the same it makes sense to review the two at the same time. These aliens could be described as fan favorite characters and they owe much of that status to their close ties to the annual Halloween celebration that is Treehouse of Horror. For awhile, these two aliens could be counted on to make at least a cameo appearance, but the show seems to have mostly dropped that. They’ve probably appeared in more than they’ve missed, and their debut occurred in the very first installment of the Halloween tradition. Still, they take up two slots of a wave that includes four figures and not one of them is an actual member of the Simpson family (though one does make it into this wave as an accessory) which is more than a little bizarre. Why not save the pair for a Treehouse-themed wave? Devil Flanders is in the fourth wave, so they’re only one figure short. Oh well, Super7’s poor planning is not the fault of these figures so let’s just see if they can stand on their own merits.
Robot Scratchy has been overthrown.
The aliens of The Simpsons are green, octopus-like creatures with one eye and a massive maw that is constantly overflowing with saliva. The aliens apparently need a very specific type of mix to the air they breath so they are most often seen in a large glass helmet that covers their head, but still allows for their tentacles to be free. I had never paid much attention to how many tentacles each alien has, but if Super7 can be assumed to have done its homework then the answer is five. Kang and Kodos are siblings and in one episode Kang refers to Kodos as his sister, though I think they refer to the character as a “he” in later episodes. Since they are largely from the Treehouse of Horror anthology episodes, their appearances are basically non-canon anyway so their circumstances change to suit the jokes and situations each plot presents. They did have one non-Treehouse appearance, but it’s an episode most consider to be pretty terrible and I have no idea if it’s considered canon or not by the show’s writers. Regardless, as action figures these two present an obvious challenge since there isn’t a whole lot to articulate. They’re also massive and come at an inflated price of $75 each. That was too rich for me initially, though once the line was cancelled I felt better about extending myself to make sure I had a full collection. Plus, I took advantage of an influencer discount at Entertainment Earth (Preternia, if you’re curious, since that guy is always alerting me to great action figure deals) and free shipping was just enough to get me to bite now rather than hold out for a possible discount later. These two arrived in a massive box which was honestly pretty exciting.
“We find your lack of mass amusing.”
The packaging for Kang and Kodos is consistent with the first two waves so slipcovers are included. The cardstock in use for their oversized boxes is thicker than usual and both actually got a little beat up in transit. They’re too big to save anyways so I tossed them, but they’re definitely two of the bigger Ultimates! boxes I’ve encountered. I think both the Power Rangers T-Rex and Dragonzord were wider, but these were deeper and taller. They’re also held in place with lots of tie-downs and twist-ties which is annoying, but they did seem to keep everything in place.
Everything about this pair is big.
Kang and Kodos are exactly the same size. Their “heads” are a little over 7″ alone and once you put the dome on their bodies you’re talking about something that’s over 11″ tall. They are big and impressive to look at, but I stress the “look at” part. In-hand, they feel shockingly cheap. Shockingly because they don’t look how one would expect them to feel. The heads are hollow so they’re very light. Some parts of the heads appear to be painted and some appear to be colored plastic made to fit in place. The mouth area is all painted well, but the green spots on the tops of the heads can be iffy. Kodos, in particular, has some bad paint up there where some of the spots are unfinished. Worse though are these domes. They’re plastic and are manufactured in two halves and then glued together. I think, because they don’t want to separate. Both were pretty scuffed up right out of the box and since they were packaged well I’m assuming they went into the box in this condition. Once again, it’s Kodos that gets the worst of it as their dome has a pretty nice scrape on it near the top and also a random black dot. Unfortunately, both eyesores are on different sides so one is always visible and the seams around the whole thing do limit the display options. Oddly, Kang’s was packaged differently and included a soft, plastic, hose around the tip of the dome though the tip on Kodos’ dome arrived fine without it. Kang also had more plastic wrapped around his head for some reason. Kodos has what appears to be some tape stuck over the left side of the eye that I’m having a hard time getting off too.
It doesn’t photograph well, but the domes are scuffed up on mine. Hopefully it’s an isolated issue.
The domes and badly painted spots are my only gripes about the presentation with these two because they have the size to earn their spot on a shelf. If they can fit, that is. I’ve been displaying my collection on the Arcade 1-Up editions of The Simpsons arcade game and these two aren’t going to fit. If I was determined to pull it off I probably could, but I doubt I’d be able to add any others. Instead, they’re going on a stand beside the cabinet and I’ll probably stick Devil Flanders with them as well.
They basically pose just enough to use their accessories.
For articulation, there’s not a lot to speak of. The heads rotate on the base and the eye is articulated as well. It’s basically a marble that can be moved around which is a nice touch. The two front and one rear tentacle are connected with hinged pegs so they can move a bit, but the range for the hinge is pretty minimal. The two side tentacles function as the arms and are connected to the body in the same manner, but they’re skinnier so the range is better. They’re also segmented and each features an “elbow” and a “wrist” for additional posing. All of the joints are the same hinged peg and they don’t do a ton. I’m not sure if a ball joint would have been better. There would likely be better range, but the sculpt would likely be broken up even more. You’re basically just going to pick your favorite accessories and pose them accordingly.
There are quite a few food-based accessories.
And for accessories, we get a lot of stuff just pulled from the show. Kodos features two tentacle ends that come to a soft point which can be swapped with a tentacle holding a salt shaker, ray gun, serving tray, or the big book on how to cook for forty humans. The ray gun is a really fun design and well painted. The tentacle piece holding onto it is kind of like a “trigger” tentacle and it pegs into the handle of the gun and can be removed. Without the gun, it sort of looks like a thumb’s up gesture. The other items have the tentacle molded to them. The serving tray or dish is a domed one and the dome does come off, though Super7 didn’t provide anything to place in it. I guess they can serve potato chips or a cream pie if you have Homer and Krusty. The other portrait for Kodos is a laughing expression and it’s a nice complement to the more menacing, default, portrait. It’s a bit more visually engaging and I feel drawn to it over the standard look.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only Simpson of wave 3.
At least she scales reasonably well.
For Kang, he has a cheeky grin by default and his alternate portrait is the same as the one included with Kodos except his eye is closed. It’s kind of lame as a result because the moveable eye is the best piece of articulation the two have. If you want the two laughing on your shelf then I guess it’s fine. Kang also comes with his hitchhiking sign that says “Earth Capital.” His default right tentacle ends in a hook shape which can hold it in place if you wish, or it has a peg hole and can be affixed to the gun-holding tentacle end, which Kang also comes with. His other parts are tentacles holding a knife and fork so you can pair the two up for a dinner scene. Kang’s best accessory though is his daughter, Maggie, following the loss of her baby legs. Maggie looks pretty vicious as she has a wide grin with visible sharp tooth. Her pacifier is on one of her tentacles and her head can rotate. She’s painted well and is the only Simpson included in wave three. Since she is in variant form, I guess it makes sense given that was the case for Homer and Bart. If you want to place her with them, she does scale pretty well.
“Go ahead and eat me. At least I’ll be able to die saying I had dinner plans.”
These two look pretty damn good and the accessories included are fine. I would have preferred a better secondary portrait for Kang, perhaps an angry one that pairs with the angry one included with Kodos, but otherwise I’m pretty satisfied with what’s included. I just wish the domes turned out cleaner. They display all right, but look pretty bad up close and for seventy-five bucks it’s inexcusable. That’s the big hindrance with these two as that asking price is crazy. I don’t know what they cost to manufacturer and ship obviously, but when Super7 asks for a premium on these larger figures, but still charges $55 for Bartman and Ralph it definitely makes the consumer feel as if they’re not getting a great value. The cheap in-hand feel of this pair doesn’t help as they don’t feel like $75 figures. I’m left wondering if it would have been better to just do them as soft vinyl figures outside of the Ultimates! line. They would have sacrificed articulation, but that would have been no great loss and looked and felt a whole lot better. They also probably would have been $200 a piece considering Super7’s Super Size vinyl figures are $300 and in some cases are not much bigger. This is what we got though so if you want a Kang and Kodos in this scale better ready that wallet or hope for a clearance event down the road. These two may not have been ordered in the quantities other figures were so it’s hard to know if it will happen, but I’d say it’s more likely than not. Just watch out for a run on them as Halloween approaches.
We have plenty more from the world of Springfield and Super7:
If you’ve been following along with my reviews on the second wave of Super7’s The Simpsons Ultimates!, then you will have noted that I’ve had a bit of a love/hate relationship with this wave. For the most part, the sculpts and deco have been on point, it’s some of the little things that have been…
When I concluded my review of wave 1 of The Simpsons Ultimates! from Super7 I was thinking that I’d be back with more reviews later in the year. That was in February of 2023. We are now in April of 2024 and finally wave two has arrived (my original order was place January 5th, 2022).…
If you’re going to market action figures to a fanbase as venerable as The Simpsons, you should probably go after what they love most. Simpsons fans love to make references to their favorite episodes and characters and one of the top episodes from the show is “You Only Move Twice” from the show’s seventh season.…
If you’ve been following along with my reviews on the second wave of Super7’s The Simpsons Ultimates!, then you will have noted that I’ve had a bit of a love/hate relationship with this wave. For the most part, the sculpts and deco have been on point, it’s some of the little things that have been botched by Super7 which just calls into question what kind of fans did they have working on this line? At least with the fourth and final figure we don’t need to have a debate about worthiness. Krusty the Clown is a character that goes all the way back to the original shorts and has been a mainstay ever since. He may not share the name Simpson, but he’s certainly an A-lister worthy of a slot in the line’s second wave.
Super7 wasn’t allowed to provide Krusty with smokes, but if you have a Gremlins figure you should have a ready supply of toy cigarettes.
Still, Krusty is not without some level of controversy. Originally, Super7 solicited a figure that would have a smoking portrait, a cigarette holding hand, and even a smoking monkey in Mr. Teeny. The Simpsons licensing department was okay with all of this, and probably even found it appropriate, but the Disney team disagreed. Smoking is a big no-no with The House of Mouse. The company even discourages characters from smoking in their films and television shows. Apparently, The Simpsons is grandfathered in as characters like Patti and Selma still light-up Sunday nights on Fox, they just can’t do so as action figures. Super7 was forced to course correct, dropping the smoking portrait for a grumpy one. Mr. Teeny is still present, just without a cigarette in his hand, and in place of the extra hand we get a jagged, metal, Krusty-O.
Krusty is another figure that’s basically right in the standard height range.
He wouldn’t be much of a clown if he didn’t come with a pie.
It is what it is, and you’ll see in my pictures that I was able to make do. Krusty isn’t going to live or die on his ability to smoke anyway and this figure is another good sculpt with a pretty good paint job. Krusty stands at around 7.125″ to the top of his head, nearly 7.5″ to the top of the tuft of hair on top. He’s depicted in his traditional attire of a pink shirt, green pants, oversized clown shoes, with a blue bowtie to top it off. His default portrait is a big, open mouth, “Hey-hey!” expression which looks okay. It’s an expression that works well in 2D, but in 3D it looks a bit odd that we can’t see any of his bottom teeth. Something else is off with it though and it took me awhile to narrow it down, but his pupils are too small. They’re tiny. Just compare my images of this figure to the licensing art over his shoulder. The other figures in the line have larger pupils as well. It may sound like a small thing, but it really throws off the look of the character. Like the other figures in the wave, he has a very matte finish, though I’m finding a few hot spots on the portraits here and there. The exposed portions of his arms unfortunately aren’t painted yellow like Duffman’s. Like a lot of Super7 figures, it’s a mix of good and not so good.
They don’t put nobodies on cereal boxes.
This is the wave of little buddy characters.
For accessories, Krusty gets a bunch of white-gloved hands. He has a set of open gripping hands, a set of closed gripping hands where the index figure connects to the thumb, a set of open hands, and a right hand with a glass of something permanently affixed to it. The contents of the glass is a translucent, off-white, substance. I have no idea what this is supposed to be. I guess it could be lemonade? My grandfather used to like rum and lemonade, so I guess we can go with that. The promotional shots had a green substance instead which also isn’t an obvious cocktail, but it’s better than this which looks like coconut oil. Would Disney not allow a brown liquid? That would have made the most sense. Both sets of gripping hands can handle the large, silver, microphone that he comes with which I suppose is needed for hosting an awards show or something. He also has a box of Krusty O’s which advertises the jagged, metal, Krusty-O right on the front. And back, as the image is the same, but it looks pretty good. There’s also a cream pie which is best held with an open hand. As for the “bonus” jagged, metal, Krusty-O, it’s…here. It doesn’t do anything and is just a little piece of silver plastic. Pretty uninspired as a make-up item.
“Don’t you even think about stealing my smokes.”
“Now! Now! Now! Now! Now!”
For optional portraits we have a screaming Krusty (“We want to go to Mount Splashmore!”) and a grumpy Krusty. The screaming head is just that, a screaming head where his mouth is wide open and eyes shut. Krusty can often be found wailing so I’m fine with it. The grumpy head probably has the most personality to it. He looks pissed, or impatient, and even his hair is sagging with displeasure. The narrow eyes work better with the tiny pupils than the standard head. It’s highly likely I use this one for my display. We also get Mr. Teeny, another slug figure to place on the shelf. He’s on roller skates, but they don’t move or anything. His hand is still up like he’s supposed to have a smoke so it’s a bit of an off position. His head can swivel and he has a side-eyed expression that’s a bit mischievous. There were promo images of him holding the cereal box under his right arm, but it doesn’t work in practice. Lastly, Krusty may not be able to smoke, but he still gets to sport a smoking jacket. Or maybe it’s just a bathrobe? Either way, it’s pink with purple trim and there’s a nice K stitched onto it. It looks fine and I’ve been using it for my display, but I might return it to the box.
WARNING: Do not ingest the jagged, metal, Krusty-O.
The jagged, metal, Krusty-O may work better as a Bartman accessory.
Krusty’s articulation is like the rest – pretty basic, but the cuts you would expect to be present are there. We have a double-ball peg at the head, hinged ball pegs at the shoulders, single-jointed elbows, wrists that swivel and hinge horizontally, a ball-joint at the waist, ball-socket hips, single-jointed knees, and ankles that hinge and rock side-to-side. The range is pretty much the same as the other figures. The hinge joints can’t quite hit 90 degrees and the legs don’t kick out very far. The knees are pretty tight while the left ankle on mine is a little loose. Not so loose that he’s falling over, but looser than I’d like. He’s mostly good for pretty basic poses – he won’t be riding a tiny bicycle on your shelf or do backflips. Instead he can stand there with his glass of whatever or scream into a microphone.
“Ugh, what’s this gonna cost me?”
Krusty is, perhaps without much surprise, my favorite of the line’s second wave. I think he’s my favorite overall for The Simpsons Ultimates! as he looks the part, the accessories are fine, and the finish is solid. My only real gripes are that I wish the glass of something had some color to it and his eyes weren’t distracting bad on the smiling portrait. I also would have probably preferred a more neutral, default, portrait to the opened mouth one, but it’s fine. The jagged, metal, Krusty-O is pretty lame, but there isn’t anything truly missing. I would have preferred a tiny bicycle instead, but it’s not like he’d be able to ride it anyway. If you’re all-in on this line, then this figure is an obvious must have and if you’re a cherry-picker then I think this is the one to get from wave two. You can probably still play the waiting game if you don’t want to fork over $55 for the privilege of owning it, but I don’t think you’ll regret much if you do decide to pay full price.
And now it’s time for the updated group shot.
Want to see more from The Simpsons Ultimates! or where I sourced that cigarette from?
I’ve had NECA’s Ultimate Flasher Gremlin on my “want” list for awhile now. I grabbed the Ultimate Gizmo last summer, and while he’s fairly limited as an action figure, he is fun to have on display in my home. He has occupied a little section of my knick-knack shelf in the living room area of…
If you’re going to market action figures to a fanbase as venerable as The Simpsons, you should probably go after what they love most. Simpsons fans love to make references to their favorite episodes and characters and one of the top episodes from the show is “You Only Move Twice” from the show’s seventh season.…
In writing up my review of Bartman from Super7’s line of Ultimates! based on The Simpsons, I got a little hot. That figure had some errors in its presentation that annoyed me, but what annoyed me more was the refusal to just let the figure exist as Bart Simpson and Bartman. It was clearly designed…
“If you want to kill someone on your way out it would really help me a lot!”
If you’re going to market action figures to a fanbase as venerable as The Simpsons, you should probably go after what they love most. Simpsons fans love to make references to their favorite episodes and characters and one of the top episodes from the show is “You Only Move Twice” from the show’s seventh season. In that episode, Homer takes a job in another town forcing the Simpsons to move (again, hence the episode’s title) to another community that just so happens to be run by a Bondsian supervillain known as Hank Scorpio. Played by Albert Brooks, Scorpio is one of the most memorable one-off characters in the long history of the show. It’s probably not a stretch to call him the most memorable one-off character. He should have been brought back for the movie, but instead the writers and producers of The Simpsons decided to create a new villain for Brooks to play.
He’s the world’s best boss – get used to it.
What makes Scorpio so great? In short: everything. He’s exceedingly nice and a quote machine. He’s an ideal boss, but also someone bent on world domination who won’t hesitate to murder in order to get what he wants. That aspect of the character is unveiled slowly, but effectively. If Super7 had polled Simpsons fans on characters they most wanted to see in this toy line I bet Scorpio would have fared well. Maybe not top ten, but certainly pretty high for a character that isn’t regularly seen or heard from. And since Super7’s approach with this line has been so episode-specific, he’s a natural fit, but can they stick the landing?
Hank is pretty average in height for this line.
Scorpio comes in the standard packaging for the line and stands at about 6.75″ to the top of his head. He’s nearly a full 7″ when you factor in the hair. He’s presented in his mint green turtleneck sweater with blue-gray slacks and brown loafers. Out of the box, he’ll be sporting a big canister on his back that is looped onto his arms. Like the other figures from this wave, Scorpio has a pretty matte finish to him. Unlike Duffman, I think it’s all derived from a clear coat applied to colored plastic. Either way, it works and he has a nice appearance, albeit a very simple one. This isn’t a sculpt that demands much and what little paint is needed is basically reserved for the head. There his orange-brown hair and beard are fine and the eyes clean. The turtleneck is part of the head sculpt which is a little unusual, but fine. I think the head is glued into the plastic so there’s no mismatched colors when comparing neck to chest. This figure won’t catch one’s eye when amongst a sea of other figures, but it looks the part.
Someone just stole his lunch.
Where things start to get a little iffy for me concerns the accessories. For hands, we get a set of fists and gripping hands of different sizes. We also get a pointing left hand and a right hand that has a “World’s Best Boss” coffee mug permanently affixed to it. The mug isn’t hollow, but the inside is left as bare, white, plastic. Why not just a little hit of brown paint for coffee? He looks like he’s drinking milk. Either way, it’s a skimpy assortment of hands. For portraits, we get a stoic one, an angry side-eye with teeth showing, and a maniacal yelling portrait. The stoic and side eye look fine, but the maniacal head could have had a better paint job on the visible teeth. There’s a gray swash on them, or maybe the white mixed with the black paint used for the back of the throat. I wish the maniacal one also had more of a smile to it. It’s subtle in the episode, and this head has a very specific use, but I don’t think Super7 quite captured it.
He has a grenade, but I’m guessing most people will display him with his other weapon.
And that head is intended for the flamethrower. He does have a grenade canister which is fine, but the main accessory is the flame thrower. For that, we get the gun, or wand, portion plus a tube that plugs into the back of it and the side of the tank on the figure’s back. The tube is cumbersome, but stays in place all right once you get it i place provided you don’t try and reposition anything. For that reason, insert it last. There’s also a flame effect for the end of the gun which is done in a translucent plastic that is orange at the base and yellow at the tip. It’s large and heavy and isn’t really the shape I think of when I think flamethrower. I’d have preferred something more narrow that streams out. Such a piece would have been lighter which would have been welcomed as this attachment will cause the barrel of the gun to sag.
There’s really no good way for him to hold this thing. Plus that hose will keep constantly popping out on you as you try to get the best position the figure will allow.
There is another issue with this accessory and it’s that the figure isn’t articulated well enough to wield it properly. The gun is intended to be held with both hands, one on the back and one at the front. The right, gripping, hand is sculpted to hold the rear handle while the left is shaped for the grenade, but can rest on the front handle. The hands can sort of get in place, but the figure has only basic articulation. That means a double-ball peg head and neck setup, hinged shoulders, single jointed elbows, wrists that swivel and hinge horizontally, a ball-jointed diaphragm, ball-jointed hips, single-jointed knees, and hinged ankles with ankle rockers. What he needs are butterfly joints at the shoulders so he can bring his left arm across his body to properly aim the flamethrower. As it stands, he basically has to hold the gun across his belly and point his left shoulder at the target. In the episode, he basically fires from the hip. You can kind of fake his shooting pose from the episode, but any further scrutiny reveals it to be pretty ridiculous. In fairness to Super7, the glamour shots did the same thing so this isn’t a bait and switch, but how about some creativity? If butterfly joints are a no-go, why not a swappable left arm that’s preposed the way it needs to be? This is just the half-assed solution and the too heavy flame effect doesn’t help.
This low angle shot of the flame in action illustrates how I think the expression is just off enough to bug me. He almost looks frightened, not deranged.
This brings me to my main critique of Hank Scorpio which is that this is not the “ultimate” expression of the character which is the mantra of the line. This figure sells out for this one scene of Hank Scorpio firing on the government operatives with his flamethrower. He basically can’t do much else aside from hold his coffee cup. Where’s the happy Hank we see all throughout the episode? No smiling portrait is a huge miss. And the back of the box depicts him with his coat on backwards, a memorable moment from the episode that he can’t achieve. Three of the figures in this wave came with soft goods, but Scorpio did not. He should have his coat, via soft goods or swappable arms and an overlay, but he doesn’t. If you’re going to call your product the ultimate expression of a character, then you better damn well do it. This isn’t it.
“Homer, I’m very disappointed you’ve chosen to take a job with the government.”
If you have been waiting decades to add a Hank Scorpio to your shelf then I suppose this figure will have to do. It’s not terrible, it just comes up way short as an expression of Hank Scorpio. I’m not demanding he be able to convert to workout gear so he can toss a shoe, but the lack of a sunny disposition is inexcusable. And since his flamethrower pose is executed poorly, I have a hard time recommending this figure. It’s a shame because this may very well be the only Hank Scorpio action figure we ever get. As has been the case with the first two figures (and most Super7 Ultimates! in general these days) you would be better served by waiting for a discount. The line is already dead so it’s not as if one’s inaction on the line at full MSRP is going to cause any long-lasting harm to it. If you also feel it’s just plain not good enough even at a discount then I wouldn’t really disagree.
Interested in reading more about Super7’s line of Simpsons Ultimates?:
When I concluded my review of wave 1 of The Simpsons Ultimates! from Super7 I was thinking that I’d be back with more reviews later in the year. That was in February of 2023. We are now in April of 2024 and finally wave two has arrived (my original order was place January 5th, 2022).…
In writing up my review of Bartman from Super7’s line of Ultimates! based on The Simpsons, I got a little hot. That figure had some errors in its presentation that annoyed me, but what annoyed me more was the refusal to just let the figure exist as Bart Simpson and Bartman. It was clearly designed…
Slowly but surely I am clearing out all of the action figure preorders I placed in the year 2021. Of the ones that had been remaining, the line I was most looking forward to experiencing was the line of Super7 Ultimates! based on The Simpsons. It was August of 2021 when these suckers went up…
In writing up my review of Bartman from Super7’s line of Ultimates! based on The Simpsons, I got a little hot. That figure had some errors in its presentation that annoyed me, but what annoyed me more was the refusal to just let the figure exist as Bart Simpson and Bartman. It was clearly designed so the body could be reused to do so, but that will never happen because the line has been cancelled. How do I know the body was designed to be a regular Bart eventually? Because the cape was entirely removable. It just slipped over the ball joint for the neck. If they wanted that body to just be Bartman, it would have been embedded in the sculpt. That’s what would have matched the show, and that’s what they did with today’s figure of Duffman.
It’s a muscle dude in a cape wit a belt full of beer – what’s there to be mad about?
Duffman should be a nice cool down review for me because what’s there to get upset about when it comes to Duffman? Aside from him existing all together (and we’ll get to that), this is a goofy character that has reappeared a few times throughout the show’s run. For a franchise that usually just tries to sell to a hardcore fanbase that worships the show’s “Golden Era,” Duffman represents a pretty late addition having first appeared in Season Nine’s “The City of New York vs. Homer Simpson.” Most fans of The Simpsons consider the eighth season to be the last of the supposed golden age and I tend to agree. Though it’s worth pointing out that this episode Duffman hails from is technically a production Season Eight episode.
Duffman seems to scale fine, but man, Simpsons head sizes are kind of crazy.
No matter, it’s Duffman, a silly parody of beer mascots from the real world the most obvious being Budman. These sorts of characters don’t really happen too often anymore because they’re kind of scummy. Who likes super heroes more than anyone? Children, and marketing alcohol to children is a shitty thing to do. It’s why we no longer have Budman, Spuds MacKenzie (more on him to follow), and Joe Camel. These are all things that I was exposed to as a kid and I think Budweiser is gross and don’t smoke, so maybe the hysteria over them was all for nothing? Duffman, as a parody of those types of characters, is fairly one note, but not without merit. He shows up with his own soundtrack (“Ohh yeah”) and is fond of thrusting towards things he wants to draw attention to. He’s usually accompanied by a bunch of party women and lots of Duff beer. Someone at Super7 must have felt he was too hilarious not to make a figure out of, or maybe they just liked his threads? It’s also possible one of the prime motivators for doing a Duffman this early in the line was because Playmates never did with their World of Springfield line. That one had to tiptoe around the alcohol associated with the show because they were sold at toy stores and Walmart. Super7 doesn’t have to do that and Disney has been surprisingly okay with alcohol in this line, though I do wonder if some restrictions were put in place.
Duffman may be tall, but Scratchy still has him beat.
Duffman comes in the standard Ultimates! style of packaging. Out of the box, he stands approximately 7.5″ making him among the tallest in the short-lived line. He strikes a more heroic figure than Bartman with broad shoulders, a puffed out chest, and slim waist. Seriously, Hasbro could stand to take some cues from this guy. Like Bartman, he has a nice, matte, finish whether we’re talking the yellow skin, red hat, or blue costume. Every surface has been coated with paint even when the underlying plastic is cast in the same color. This does mean you’ll get some paint flaking at the joints where the paint can’t adhere properly to the harder plastic, but it’s a small price to pay. The cape is done with soft goods and it’s embedded in the torso. This means it isn’t removable, but why would it need to be? The sunglasses are also part of the sculpt, but there are painted eyes behind them. The belt, which is lovingly adorned with cans of Duff beer, appears to clasp in the back, but it may be reenforced with glue which is fine by me. The cans, unfortunately, are not removable.
Duffman is number 1!
Duffman comes with a smattering of accessories. He has a whole bunch of hands, but surprisingly not a lot of pairs. For actual pairs of hands there’s a set of relaxed/narrow gripping hands and a set of style pose hands that I think are supposed to work with an accessory, but don’t. There’s a pointing right hand, a left fist, a right chop, a left “Devil Horns” gesture, and a right, wide, gripping hand. There’s also a “foam” finger hand since Duffman does make appearances at the stadium for the Springfield Isotopes. I believe the style pose hands are supposed to work with the included Duff beer 7-pack accessory, but the fingers won’t fit through the openings. They can grab the rings from the side, so maybe that was the intention? Perhaps with some heat and force the finger could sneak through the slots, but the accessory is fully painted and Duffman’s hands are white. Plus, the wide gripping hand can grab that 7th can just fine. The cans are painted just as well as the ones on his belt, but can’t come out of the rings. Did Disney allow the use of Duff cans so long as they couldn’t be removed from the belt or this ring setup? It would be kind of odd, but maybe they have a line in the sand when it comes to toy beer.
My open mouth head has an awful black mark on the teeth I may try to touch up.
If you’re a big fan of Santa’s Little Helper then Wave Two of Simpsons Ultimates! has probably made you happy.
Duffman also comes with a couple of alternate portraits. His default one is his big smile, the expression he wears more often than not in the show. He also has a yelling head for when he needs to get the party going. The last head is covered with an oversized Duff beer sticker from the episode “Pygmoelian.” It’s a bit of a stupid, gag, head that likely no one will use especially since it was slapped on his face in the episode by a post plastic surgery Moe. The sticker is removable as it just pegs into his mouth, but the expression without it isn’t of much use as a display piece. It’s not an egregious inclusion because what else is truly needed for Duffman? A keg would have been cool, I suppose, or some Duff beer in bottles. His final accessory is Santa’s Little Helper as Suds MacKenzie. Yes, another parody of a dead beer mascot and our second SLH of the wave. This one is less articulated than the first as he’s in a seated position. The head rotates, but that’s it. The figure is well-painted, but once again, fans may be left wishing it could be converted into a generic version of the family dog and not forced to live as this gimmick version.
The sticker face is an okay gag, but probably not something many are likely to make use of.
The sticker is removable if you want a…sucking face?
Articulation for Duffman is going to be pretty basic and typical of the line: double-ball-peg head, hinged shoulder pegs, single jointed elbows, hinged wrists that swivel, ball-jointed hips, single-jointed knees, and ankles that hinge and rock. What he lacks is torso articulation of any kind that I can tell. If there’s a waist twist here it doesn’t want to go and I don’t want to push it. The cape is also wired and can be posed reasonably well, but everything else is pretty limited. Elbows and knees can’t bend 90 degrees and the ankle hinge is pretty limited. The belt prevents him from kicking forward much and he can’t kick back at all. This is a set it and forget it kind of figure. The joints are also pretty tight, but the hips have some looseness to them. Not enough to make it a problem now, but something to keep an eye on.
At the end of the day, it’s Duffman. He’s fine.
Duffman is an easy figure to review as I could have simply said if you like what you see, then you’ll like this figure. It would have saved me a lot of time too. This figure isn’t going to pose very well, but it’s at least well-executed when it comes to the presentation. I wish the elbows were a little better and that he had a proper waist twist. I think he’s supposed to, but mine is tight or the belt is holding it in place. As for the rest, the accessories are fine. One of the heads is pretty useless and I would trade it for something else, but it’s not a huge problem for me. When it comes to any lingering feelings towards Duffman, it’s just a question of was it too soon for this character? Considering the second wave consisted of a Simpson, an A-list secondary character, a fan-favorite one-off, and Duffman I think it’s fine. Would I have picked him for this wave? No, but I’m not angered by his inclusion. Now, if I had known the line would only last four waves from the start well then, yeah, I’d be pretty irritated, but that’s not Duffman’s fault. I do think it’s bizarre that two waves into the line and no female characters are present, but not egregious. That’s more a critique for wave three. As was the case with Bartman, if you think $55 is a proper price for this figure and you want a Duffman then I say go for it. If you’d rather not spend that much then hold off because this figure has clearance written all over it given he’s not an in-demand character and the line is already cancelled.
We’ve got plenty more reviews of The Simpsons by Super7:
When I concluded my review of wave 1 of The Simpsons Ultimates! from Super7 I was thinking that I’d be back with more reviews later in the year. That was in February of 2023. We are now in April of 2024 and finally wave two has arrived (my original order was place January 5th, 2022).…
Our first two looks at the inaugural wave of Ultimates! from Super7 based on The Simpsons have been two very episode specific takes. One was Deep Space Homer from the episode of the same name where Homer went to space and the figure presents the character in his space suit. The second figure was Poochie,…
Slowly but surely I am clearing out all of the action figure preorders I placed in the year 2021. Of the ones that had been remaining, the line I was most looking forward to experiencing was the line of Super7 Ultimates! based on The Simpsons. It was August of 2021 when these suckers went up…
When I concluded my review of wave 1 of The Simpsons Ultimates! from Super7 I was thinking that I’d be back with more reviews later in the year. That was in February of 2023. We are now in April of 2024 and finally wave two has arrived (my original order was place January 5th, 2022). I don’t know what the deal was, but for whatever reason The Simpsons got really backed up at Super7. Some of it was probably due to the licensor in Disney which we know forced the company to remove a cigarette smoking head from the Krusty figure. My understanding is the head was approved by The Simpsons team at 20th Century Television, but once it got to Disney it had to go. They have a strict no smoking policy when it comes to merchandise and while it was disappointing, I get it. Did that one alteration cause this line to get so severely delayed? Maybe, because waves 3 and 4 shipped right behind it. Unfortunately, there were more issues.
He’s a little guy.
Super7’s co-founder Brian Flynn announced in an interview on the Robo Don’t Know YouTube channel earlier this year that Simpsons (and their relationship with Disney) was dead. He didn’t elaborate except to say that the two companies didn’t see eye-to-eye on a lot of things. Disney didn’t “get it” when it came to the Super7 business model. And maybe that’s because no one can figure that out? I thought about making a post about that interview here and the line’s cancellation, but realized it would just be a rant and I don’t really do rants. Super7’s approach to The Simpsons has been asinine. I’ve been a defender of the episode-specific approach of the company’s figures, but I’m also not dense. I can see all over social media and on YouTube the response to the line which has been “Where’s the regular family?” In that very same interview the line was announced as cancelled, Flynn talks about the importance of heavy hitters and recognizable characters to a wave of action figures. The reference is to ThunderCats, but for whatever reason that logic wasn’t applied to The Simpsons. Super7 figured that out way too late because they revealed a fifth wave which was going to include Marge (with Maggie), Lisa, and Groundskeeper Wily all in their normal, everyday, attire. Too little, too late, because the line is ending with the fourth wave.
Bartman is in some respects an action figure I really like. It’s pretty well made and looks like the character it’s supposed to. It’s also a terrific encapsulation for why this line is a failure. Before we get into that, let’s just talk about Bartman the action figure. It comes in the standard Ultimates! box with cloud-covered slipcover with an image of Bartman on the back and a note on which episode he first appeared in. Removing the slipcover reveals the figure inside behind a window box. These slipcovers are supposed to be going away soon, but at least it’s uniform for now with the first wave of The Simpsons.
Does he scale with Poochie? I have no idea, but this is what the two look like together.
Out of the box, Bartman stands at approximately four and a half inches. This puts the top of his spiky hair right at about chest level when compared with wave one’s Deep Space Homer. Bartman is probably a little too big for perfect scale, but it seems okay enough. As this is Bartman, it’s Bart Simpson with a cape and cowl mimicking Batman. This was mostly a licensing thing back in the early 90s, but Bartman did appear in the Season Three episode “Three Men and a Comic Book” which is where most of the inspiration for this figure comes from. The cowl is part of the sculpt and painted a dark purple. The shirt is Bart’s traditional orange which is in keeping with the episode, though most Bartman depictions outside of the show featured a light blue shirt. That would have made for an obvious variant, but I’m guessing that’s not going to happen now. Bartman has his blue shorts and blue sneakers and most of the figure appears to be colored plastic, but with a matte finish to reduce that shiny, plastic, look. The yellow parts of the limbs lack that finish, unfortunately, but it stands out less with a small figure.
From what I’ve been able to ascertain, this smiling head is not supposed to feature a side-eyed glance.
The paint on the head is pretty crisp. There will likely be minor imperfections around the eyes of most figures, but nothing egregious. Unfortunately, the pupils on mine are not aligned properly giving him a side-eye portrait. This appears to be uncommon based on images I’ve seen online. The cowl helps lessen the need for more of an outline on those eyes, something I felt Homer and Moe from wave one would have benefitted from. His default portrait features a toothy smile and it looks fine. There’s no black linework on his teeth, but that might have been overkill if present. Bartman does feature a cape, but for some reason it’s blue. His cape and cowl should match, and I don’t know if the shade of the cowl is even the right purple, but it’s close enough to the show. It also has a bow on it for some reason, which also doesn’t match the show. The bow matches the licensing art, but the shirt doesn’t – pick a lane, Super7! Bartman features a utility belt and I think it came from a video game. For a second, I thought it might be from “The Homer They Fall,” but that episode features a completely different belt. It’s thankfully easily removable and just slides right off the figure. The factory also missed (or whoever approved the paint sample missed it) the white circles on the inner half of Bart’s shoes. The circle is sculpted on his feet, but they were left blue like the rest of the foot.
This portrait is an odd choice.
Bart definitely needs his trusty slingshot.
Bartman comes with a whole bunch of accessories from that episode I mentioned earlier. He has four sets of hands: fists, relaxed, style posed, gripping. He also has a ninth hand clutching a wad of money. For head portraits, we get two extra: stoic and worried. The stoic head is bizarre in that his mouth is in a smile position, but his eyelids are partially closed. I don’t know what Super7 was going for, he just looks high. The worried look is fine and it pairs well with another accessory, or if paired with the money hand it can make him look desperate to purchase Radioactive Man number 1, but why no angry portrait? Most Bartman images feature an angry, or determined, expression and that’s even true of a lot of the episode. Hell, just look at the reference art on the damn box. It’s an odd omission.
Bartman can’t fly, so he kind of needs a skateboard to get around.
I’m so glad he comes with his trusty…bird’s nest?
For the rest of the stuff, we get Bart’s green skateboard. It features working wheels and has the familiar orange stripe down the center and a single peg for one of Bart’s feet. There’s the issue of Radioactive Man number 1 and the printing of the cover looks okay. It’s not a perfect recreation, and the back is blank, but it’s okay. There’s a bird’s nest which features a lone, white, bird and the remnants of the comic inside it. It’s an impressive paint job, but what the hell am I going to do with this? Bartman also has his trusty slingshot. He doesn’t have a back pocket to store it in, but it’s sculpted like it’s being drawn and the figure can do an okay job of simulating such a pose. Lastly, we get Santa’s Little Helper with Radioactive Man number 1 in his maw. The front legs and head swivel so it’s not a slug figure and overall he looks good. I wish he had an action pose head simulating him shaking it back and forth like how we see swirling effects for characters that have weapons they swing (think Thor’s hammer accessory from Hasbro, or Michelangelo’s whirling nunchaku effect) in circular motions. Or just a regular Santa’s Little Helper head to swap, but that would make too much sense.
At least Santa’s Little Helper is a nice inclusion.
The articulation for Bartman is nothing we haven’t seen before. A double ball-pegged head lets him look around reasonably well with little room to look up and down. Ball-hinged shoulders let his arms rotate and go out to the side while the single jointed elbows swivel and bend about ninety degrees. Wrists rotate and hinge and all of the hinges are horizontal in nature. There’s a ball joint at the waist for swivel and some tilt, though the t-shirt restricts a lot of that. The legs won’t go out to the side for full splits or kick forward all the way, but the range is probably enough for Bartman. The knees bend less than ninety degrees and the ankles feature hinges with limited range and acceptable ankle rockers. The cape is wired, so it has some pose-ability as well. It’s not big enough to do anything crazy, but it will work to simulate motion if you put Bartman on his skateboard or in a flight stand.
“Umm, Krusty? Your robe is open…”
Objectively speaking, this is a solid action figure. It moves well enough and it looks pretty good, though some of the flaws feel inexcusable at this price range. As a Simpsons fan though, I am so annoyed by this release. The cape is the wrong color and has a stupid bow on it that shouldn’t be there. The belt is useless and not from the episode this figure is drawing inspiration from and it along with the bird’s nest could have been scrapped for something better. How about, oh I don’t know, a plain Bart Simpson head?! Would that have been so hard? And if you’re thinking of painting one of the existing heads, the cowl is part of the sculpt and it will look awful if you were to do that. We don’t even get the most suitable Bartman portrait nor do we get a normal Santa’s Little Helper. Super7 went out of their way to deny us a regular Bart figure with a bunch of useless junk in the box and then they go on YouTube and act surprised that sales weren’t as good as they expected and can’t understand why Disney won’t just let them do what they want. I don’t normally do this, but whoever was in charge of this line at Super7 should be demoted or outright fired. It is the most asinine, stubborn, absurd approach to marketing a toy line that I have ever seen. At some point during these years of development Super7 could have added a Bart head to the package. “We hear you, we screwed up, here’s the thing you’re asking for,” but instead they dug in their heals, didn’t even bother putting a Simpson in Wave 3, stuck another Homer variant in Wave 4, then threw their hands in the air when it all went to shit.
“Finally, Radioactive Man #1 is mine.”
If you want a Bartman figure, this is fine. If the imperfections are going to ruin it for you, then by all means give it a pass. And if you’re on the fence, considering that the line is dead you will probably save yourself some money if you wait. I preordered all of Wave Two from Super7 directly as a show of good faith and to tell them I want more Simpsons. How did that work out for me?
Slowly but surely I am clearing out all of the action figure preorders I placed in the year 2021. Of the ones that had been remaining, the line I was most looking forward to experiencing was the line of Super7 Ultimates! based on The Simpsons. It was August of 2021 when these suckers went up…
Our first two looks at the inaugural wave of Ultimates! from Super7 based on The Simpsons have been two very episode specific takes. One was Deep Space Homer from the episode of the same name where Homer went to space and the figure presents the character in his space suit. The second figure was Poochie,…
We’re back with the fourth, and final, review of the inaugural wave of Super7 Ultimates! from The Simpsons. And today, you’re getting a two for one as we’re looking at two figures: Robot Itchy and Robot Scratchy. This pair hails from the Season 6 episode “Itchy & Scratchy Land” which was one part Westworld and…
Today, we return to my best Christmas specials of all-time list with television’s first family: The Simpsons. The Simpsons are the brainchild of series creator Matt Groening who allegedly came up with the idea as a spur of the moment one when he needed something to pitch to the Fox Network. He essentially based The Simpsons on his own family and even borrowed some of the names of his family members for the now iconic characters of the show. The pitch was a success and The Simpsons became a segment on The Tracey Ullman Show. When it gained enough popularity that the Fox Network couldn’t ignore, the segment was spun-off into its own series.
When Fox decided to take a chance on The Simpsons it did so with some trepidation. TV people James L. Brooks and Sam Simon were added to the mix to give it some credibility, but the Fox Network was still young with inexperience at virtually every level of the operation. And the TV guys the network brought in had little experience with animation. Fox wasn’t willing to commit to a full season order, so 13 episodes were ordered for the first season. That inexperience with animation reared its head early when the very first episode, “Some Enchanted Evening,” came back from the overseas animator looking dreadful. Un-airable. The team didn’t understand how long retakes would take in animation nor did they realize how expensive they were. It’s not a big deal to do reshoots in live-action with a set that lives in perpetuity on a studio lot, but for animation someone has to re-draw, re-color, and re-edit the show.
Obviously, those growing pains would eventually pay dividends and The Simpsons is currently airing its 35th season. And it all started here. When “Some Enchanted Evening” came back so bad it called for a lot of changes, the show wouldn’t make its original air date so Fox decided to delay it to give it more time. As part of that delay, the Christmas episode was moved up. Now, The Simpsons could premiere as a Christmas special in December of 1989 with the rest of the season kicking off in 1990. It’s a bit unusual for a show to start with a Christmas episode, but not unheard of. The Fox animated series Life With Louie would do a Christmas special as a pilot a few years later which would turn into a series order for that show. And because today’s episode was the first to air, it’s now just recognized as the show’s first episode even though it wasn’t number 1 in production order.
The first season of The Simpsons is admittedly a little rough. It always takes a show time to find its voice and The Simpsons is no different. For a first episode though, this one is pretty damn good. The show knew it wanted the family to be a bit dysfunctional. So many television families of the past were rather wholesome with little conflict within the family unit that wasn’t just some trivial issue. That was changing in the 80’s and the sitcom Roseanne is often cited as one of the first shows willing to put a more “real” family on TV. Married…with Children went hard into that with a more farcical take while The Simpsons would land somewhere in-between. Being animation, the show could get a little out there when compared with a live-action sitcom while still retaining plot issues like job security and money.
And this first episode of The Simpsons very much deals with money issues. Financial stress around the holidays is definitely not unique to the Simpsons and many families deal with that every year. It’s exacerbated by the presence of Santa Claus who bestows presents on the good boys and girls of the world and coal on the bad ones. When Santa brings the rich kid down the street a new bike while the poor kid settles for a yo-yo, it’s bound to raise some questions on the playground. As a result, all parents feel pressured to shower their children with gifts whether they can afford it or not. I’m guilty of going a little nuts around the holidays, and while I’ve never spent outside my means, I do regret not setting expectations lower. Maybe one gift should be from Santa and the rest from mom and dad. It might not make the kid who gets little feel much better, but at least said kid isn’t left wondering why Santa treats him so poorly while the kid who doesn’t need any help is rewarded.
They must be pretty late if no one is even on the road.
Anyway, the unique flavor of this Christmas episode of The Simpsons is what makes it so endearing for me. It also doesn’t hurt that it has incredible historic significance by being the first of over 700 episodes and counting. Perhaps to give it more of a “Christmas Special” feel, the episode doesn’t begin with the usual show intro. We just get a quick jingle of the main theme (composed by Danny Elfman) with a graphic that reads “The Simpsons Christmas Special” super-imposed over a dark, snowy, backdrop. Homer (Dan Castellaneta), Marge (Julie Kavner), and Maggie are in the car heading for a school Christmas recital. Homer is driving rather erratically as they’re apparently late while Marge urges him to slow down.
“Pardon my goulashes.”
When the family arrives at the recital, late, they’re forced to awkwardly slip in to find seats. As they do so, Homer keeps calling out to other fathers he knows and who could forget Homer’s buddy Norman? Or Fred? Yeah, these are names we’ll never hear again. Even though Homer makes a remark to Norman about “getting dragged here too” he seems pretty cheerful and happy to be present, a far cry from how he feels about attending a thorough re-telling of the life of George Washington in Season Four.
A very odd color choice here.
Once they find their seats, Homer and Marge watch as Principal Skinner (Harry Shearer) introduces the presentations which are by class. Up next, a presentation of Santas from around the world by the second graders. It almost feels like there’s only one second grade class in this school which gives Springfield a very small town feel. I think in my town, a suburb in New Hampshire, we had around 12-15 classes per grade. Up first is possibly a proto-Janie (Pamela Hayden) to talk about German Santa who bestows gifts upon the good children and whipping rods on the parents of bad children to beat them with. We then hear from a proto-Ralph (Nancy Cartwright) who looks a little like Ralph Wiggum, but sounds nothing like him. He’s a Japanese priest who resembles Santa and his main feature is that he has eyes in the back of his head which the child demonstrates with a pair of spring-eyed glasses he’s wearing backwards. The crowd gasps as they fall out of place which feels very quaint by today’s standards. Finally, it’s Lisa’s (Yeardley Smith) turn who will be portraying a Polynesian Santa or something. It too causes the crowd to gasp because it involves a fire dance, or maybe they’re gasping because she looks like she isn’t wearing any pants? It’s an odd coloring choice as she’s wearing a straw skirt with virtually no coverage and her leggings are the same color as her flesh. Everyone applauds when she finishes either because they enjoyed it or because they’re just impressed she didn’t burn the place down.
“He’s the boy you love to hate!”
And now it’s time to hear from the fourth grade class – screw those stupid third graders! This is, of course, Bart’s (Cartwright) class and what’s America’s soon-to-be favorite little hellion going to do to ruin this pageant? Why, nothing more than change the words to “Jingle Bells.” You know the one, that famous school yard parody of unknown origin that turns the yuletide classic into a song about Batman’s poor hygiene. As the camera pans through the crowd of fourth-graders assembled on the stage, virtually none of them are recognizable. I did spot Lewis and Milhouse is in the first row, but the other faces are weird and unfamiliar. Before Bart breaks into his own rendition, Marge gets to comment on how angelic he is. Once he finishes his verse, a hand jumps into frame to yank him out of position. I assume it belonged to Skinner. Homer looks mad, then he looks bored as there’s a dissolve to indicate the passage of time and we can hear Skinner announcing the fifth grade performance. Behind Marge, there’s a woman without a nose which is creepy. Homer mutters aloud “How many grades does this school have?” and we fade out.
Christmas is coming, Simpsons.
We’re now at the home of the Simpson family! It’s decorated for Christmas and there’s a roaring fire. The kids are writing out their Christmas lists while Marge is working on a Christmas letter to send out. We hear her internal dictation to herself as she writes it. She notes that their cat died, but they replaced old Snowball with a new cat – Snowball II. Snowball II can be seen getting tangled in a box of Christmas lights which Homer is trying to untangle. It also should be noted the joke here is that the dead cat was a white one and appropriately named Snowball while the new one is a black cat, but they just kept the name anyway. Marge writes about how Grandpa is still alive and as feisty as ever and boasts about how well Lisa is doing in school. When she gets to Bart she just writes, “…well, we love Bart,” and lets that be it. Homer angrily barks at her asking if she finished that “stupid” letter yet prompting Marge to write “Homer sends his love,” before putting the finishing touches on it.
I tried to get the twister mouth captured, but it was driving me nuts, so here’s this relatively bland image instead.
Homer resumes his demands of Marge as he can’t seem to locate the extension chord. Marge snaps back that it’s where it should be – in the utility drawer. Good for Marge for standing up for herself. Homer softens and apologizes and blames it all on his excitement for the holidays. He then retrieves the extension chord from the drawer and we get a sort of “d’oh!” out of him when he finds it all tangled. Marge then asks the kids for their lists and indicates that she’ll send them to Santa right away. This prompts Bart to mutter, through a classic Simpsons twister mouth expression, “Oh please, there’s only one fat guy who brings presents and his name ain’t Santa.” You can tell the show wasn’t really going after the kid market in the beginning otherwise such a line wouldn’t exist.
This is just the beginning of Homer’s hatred of Patty and Selma.
Marge is then dismayed to see that the only thing Lisa wants is a pony and Bart wants a tattoo. Bart tries to justify his desire by saying they last forever, but Homer tells him he’s not getting one. If Bart wants a tattoo he’ll have to pay for it himself! Well, at least he tried. The phone rings and Homer answers it. On the other line is one of Marge’s sisters who just asks for Marge. Homer tries asking who is calling, but she just keeps asking for Marge as she clearly wants nothing to do with Homer. This just angers Homer, but he finally hands the phone to Marge and we find out it’s her sister Patty (Kavner). She indicates that she and her twin sister Selma (also Kavner) would be delighted to spend Christmas Eve with their baby sister. Marge tells her that she and Homer would be delighted to see them too and Patty, correctly, notes that Homer is probably not very enthusiastic about it. She then starts to complain about Homer as the scene fades out.
Don’t be confused, this is an image of the lights turned on. Nice attention to detail by having Homer’s imprint still in the snow.
When the next scene fades in, we find Homer on the roof in a rather precarious position as he attempts to hang Christmas lights. He does the predictable thing and falls, but there’s a nice pile of powder for him to land on so he’s no worse for ware. Homer then calls the kids over to plug in the lights. For some reason, he’s also wearing a tie now. Maybe this is the next night after work? Anyway, Homer calls for Marge to turn them on and it’s a rather pathetic display as only a couple of lights are working. Lisa adds a “Nice try, Dad,” while Bart can’t even muster up an insult and just hangs his head with a groan. Homer seems pleased though, at least until his neighbor Ned Flanders (Shearer) shouts over to ask him what he thinks of his display? He plugs it in and it’s pretty spectacular compared with Homer’s as all of the lights are working and there’s even an animated Santa on the roof. The kids stare at it in awe while Homer complains it’s too bright and crosses his arms angrily to mutter to himself.
The fabled big jar of money!
The next morning, Marge tells the kids over breakfast that she’s heading to the mall for Christmas shopping, and if they want to go too, they should go get their money. They’re pretty excited about going to the mall because it’s 1989 and that’s where all the action is! With them out of the kitchen, Homer is able to prod Marge about her secret stash of Christmas money. She tells him to close his eyes so as not to reveal her hiding place and when he does we find out it’s a big jar she keeps hidden in her giant hair. Marge must have amazing neck strength. Homer opens his eyes and remarks on how big the jar is this year as it’s full of bills and coins.
These things always seem like such a good idea at the time.
At the mall, Marge and Lisa go off shopping basically leaving Bart to his own whims. He soon happens upon a tattoo parlor and notices a display containing a heart design that says “Mother” on it. Bart fantasizes how such a tattoo would be received by his own mother which confirms to him that she thinks it’s a wonderful present that makes him look dangerous. Since Bart’s imagination is infallible, he heads to the counter and demands “One mother, please.” The tattoo artist curtly asks how old he is and Bart cheerfully responds with “21 my good man!” The guy simply responds with “Get in the chair.” According to the episode commentary, the writers struggled with how to get Bart into the tattoo chair because who would agree to tattoo a 10 year old? This simple line was what they settled on and I think it works. The line delivery by Harry Shearer is also perfect in selling this guy’s “I don’t care” attitude.
A Season One look at the office of C. Montgomery Burns. Interesting that the stuffed bear would remain a mainstay.
We cut to the Springfield Nuclear Power Plant which has a festive banner at the entrance denoting the time of year. We find Homer inside doing something he rarely does: work. He’s looking at some gauges and noting the readings on a clipboard. This is still Homer though and it would appear he’s doing a bad job as one meter rises abruptly and another is flashing red. The intercom comes on and it’s the voice of Waylon Smithers (Shearer) who is set to introduce Mr. Burns (Shearer) for an important announcement. Despite Smithers requesting that all employees continue working through this announcement, Homer puts his clipboard down and starts munching on a donut. He’s soon joined by several other, random, workers as Mr. Burns makes his announcement. He is pleased to report that they have improved plant safety without affecting consumer costs or management pay raises. Unfortunately, for the other “semi-skilled” workers, as he puts it, this means there will be no Christmas bonus this year. Dejected, the other workers disperse while Homer looks pretty distressed and thanks God for the big jar of money.
Lasers: very expensive and not for the groin.
Naturally, this means the big jar of money is in serious plot jeopardy. We go back to the mall and Marge spots her precious little guy in the chair at the tattoo parlor. She storms in and yanks the boy out mid-tattoo turning his intended “Mother” tattoo into one that says “Moth.” She drags him by the arm, his recently tattooed arm, a few stores down which just so happens to be a laser surgery center. I can’t say I ever saw such a place in a mall, but it does make good business sense to have one located near a tattoo parlor. The technician (Shearer) tells Marge they can remove the tattoo, but it’s a costly procedure that requires an upfront, cash, payment. Marge just looks at the big jar of money she’s carrying in despair and adds a “Thank God for Homer’s Christmas bonus.” Oh Marge, you poor fool! With the payment seemingly made, Bart can get the procedure. As the laser warms up, we get to hear one of Bart’s catchphrases, “Aye carumba!” The technician then instructs him not to squirm as you wouldn’t want to get this laser near your eye or your groin. Apparently, getting the word groin past the censors was a minor battle the show won.
Just in case there wasn’t a penny lurking in there, she turns it upside down.
It’s time to head back to 742 Evergreen Terrace (well, technically, in Season One the address had yet to be decided, but you get the idea) where Bart is sitting on the couch watching TV while Lisa pokes his new arm injury. She pokes, he says “Ow! Quit it,” and we repeat. Maggie also gets in on it. I actually really like this gag. Homer comes home to hear the bad news. Lisa is almost too eager to tell her father that the family had to blow the Christmas jar on laser surgery for Bart. Homer takes one look at that empty jar, which Marge turns upside down and shakes for added dramatic effect, and immediately begins wailing about Christmas being cancelled. Marge then assures her husband things will be okay because they still have his Christmas bonus. If you think this is the part where Homer tells the family he’s not getting a bonus this year then you have clearly never watched a sitcom. Homer just acts like he’s just remembering he has that bonus coming and no one in the family appears to pick up on the fact that he’s lying. Homer then exits the house through the kitchen, which is somehow the front door. One of the fun aspects to watching Season One of this show now is how crazy the layout of the house gets. Some shots will just have endless entryways in the background, or even in this past scene, Marge enters into the living room via the den, but when camera cuts back to her it’s the kitchen that’s behind her.
A lot of early episodes of The Simpsons feature Homer and Marge in bed.
Homer takes a sad look at his crappy Christmas decorations and the camera pans to the home of the Flanders so we can get a better sense of how inferior Homer’s Christmas is shaping up in comparison. He can’t even muscle up a “Stupid Flanders,” comment, only hang his head in shame. The scene then shifts to one of Marge and Homer in bed. Marge can tell something is bothering Homer and that he’s hiding something from her as well. When she brings up the subject of his Christmas bonus, Homer gets a chance to come clean, but instead of doing so makes up a lie about wanting to do the Christmas shopping this year. Marge is happy to hand over the list to her husband as that’s one less thing she has to worry about and she rolls over to go to sleep. With the lights out, we can still see the white of Homer’s eyes and his unsure smile.
Can’t be forgetting little Maggie’s Christmas present.
The next day, Homer heads out to do said Christmas shopping. His venue of choice? Not the mall, that’s much too expensive, for he has come to the seldom seen Circus of Values. I don’t think this store ever resurfaces in the future. Homer is monologuing his shopping decisions, which is very convenient for us viewers, as he picks out gifts for the family. Marge is getting pantyhose, Bart some pads of paper, and Maggie gets a squeak toy intended for dogs that’s shaped like a porkchop. Lisa apparently gets nothing. As Homer leaves with his lone bag of “gifts,” he bumps into Flanders outside. Ned couldn’t see him because his arms were piled high with wrapped gifts which are now all over the sidewalk. Ned apologizes then takes note of the mess before them and how tricky it will be to sort out what’s what. As he starts picking stuff up with a “One of mine,” for each, Homer growls back “They’re all yours!” since he has his lone bag in-hand. To add further insult to injury, Todd Flanders (Pamela Hayden, and the credits actually list this as Rod Flanders, but it’s clearly Todd) has picked up Homer’s porkchop and offers it back to him which he angrily snatches from the youth’s hand. Mind you, this looks extra pathetic as the Simpson family doesn’t currently own a dog. The two Flanders then head off to wherever it is they’re off to with Todd telling his dad that this will be the best Christmas ever! Does anybody ever make such a statement unironically in real life?
This version of Moe’s Tavern is basically free of dank.
Feeling pretty low, Homer heads to his favorite watering hole: Moe’s Tavern. Here, the grumpy Moe (Hank Azaria) is sporting a festive Santa hat and is overseeing a pretty well-decorated bar. The Moe of later seasons would never go this far to decorate his place. He also has black hair and a pink apron, two things that will change before the season is concluded. He asks Homer what’s wrong and notes he’s been sucking on a beer all day. He even offers Homer a candy cane to cheer him up – who is this guy?! Barney (Castellaneta) enters and announces drinks all around! Which is just he and Homer. He’s decked out in a Santa suit and Homer prods why. Barney tells him he got a job playing Santa down at the mall as he downs almost an entire mug of beer in one swig. Homer asks if he thinks he could get a job doing that and Barney cautions him by saying “They’re very selective,” before unleashing his classic belch. In case you were unaware, Barney is named after Barney Rubble as the writers thought it would be funny to give Homer a loser Barney as a best friend.
These Santas look more than a little strung out.
We cut to Homer on a job interview for this Santa program. The man conducting the interview (Shearer) wants to know if Homer likes kids and his response is “All the time?” He’s clearly not good at this stuff. The guy just frowns and Homer picks up on it and reassures the man that he does indeed like children. He’s hired on the spot, but is then given the bad news that he has to go through Santa training. This takes us to perhaps one of the more enduring scenes from this episode as a room full of men dressed as Santa are robotically belting out “Ho ho ho,” from desks. The laughter, if you want to call it that, is interrupted by Homer raising his hand to ask the trainer (also Shearer, the guy voices almost everyone in this thing) when they get paid. He’s told “Not a dime until Christmas Eve,” and the men in the room resume their “Ho ho ho” routine only with much less enthusiasm.
There aren’t many bullet-headed characters in future episodes.
Next we find Homer in front of the class trying to recall the names of Santa’s reindeer. He gets the first three right, then guesses Nixon, followed by Comet, Cupid, Donna Dixon. The trainer just curtly tells him to sit down. It then cuts to Homer seated with a smile on his face while the trainer sits on his lap. They’re role-playing how a visit with Santa might go, and when the trainer accuses him of being a fake, Homer’s response is to punch him in the face. The trainer prevents him from doing so and gets him to calm down and instructs him that he’s supposed to just lie to get out of such a sticky situation by saying he’s one of Santa’s helpers. Homer reassures himself that he knew that and this is apparently all the training he’s getting.
Even the kids can’t stand them.
Homer enters the house, exhausted, and Marge is there to ask him why he’s seven hours late. He tells her he doesn’t want to talk about it and is heading straight for the tub. I feel like no one does that anymore, or maybe people with fancy tubs or hot tubs do. I, like the Simpsons, have a pretty basic bath tub and I wouldn’t dream of taking a bath in it. Marge tells Homer that her sisters are here which forces a shudder from Homer. He slinks into the living room to say hi while Bart and Lisa are relieved to see their father as it means getting away from the clutches of their aunts. They both latch onto one of his legs as Homer greets the twins doing a very poor job of masking his dislike for them. When he wishes them a “Merry Christmas,” they both sort of snort in response and point out how you can’t tell it’s Christmas in this house because there’s no tree. Homer angrily responds that he was just about to go get one. Bart and Lisa run after him asking if they can tag along, but their father snaps at them with a “No!” before storming out.
Does Homer always keep a chainsaw in his trunk or did he take it from the garage knowing this is how his night was going to end up?
Homer heads out into the night to the tune of “Winter Wonderland.” We see him drive by lot after lot of Christmas trees all with a posted price that is apparently out of his price range. And with good reason, the first one wants $75 a tree. In 1989, $75 was like $180 today and that’s pretty insane for a tree. I think I paid $65 for my tree last year and it was at one of those farms where you pick out your own tree and cut it down. I haven’t bought a lot tree since I was a kid, so I’m not sure if what I do costs more money or less. As Homer drives, he passes other lots and the price is going down, but not by much. The last one we see is advertising slightly irregular trees for $45 that look like something out of a Dr. Seuss book so Homer does the only sensible thing: he sneaks onto someone’s property and cuts his own tree! We just see him as a shadowy figure with the sound of a chainsaw echoing around him. Dogs are unleashed, there’s some gunfire, but Homer escapes unharmed.
It’s never a bad idea to bribe Santa, kid.
Back at home, everyone is impressed with Homer’s tree while Selma points out there’s a birdhouse in it. Homer just says it’s an ornament, but I doubt he’s fooling his sisters-in-law who are at least kind enough to just drop the subject. We end the scene with Patty asking if she smells gun powder. Now, it’s mall time and Homer is in the big guy’s chair! Some little kid (Cartwright) is asking him for a bunch of stuff, but Homer tells him he doesn’t need all of that junk since he probably has a good home and a loving father who would do anything for him. The kid has no response, so Homer just asks him for a bite of his donut. The scene ends with the photographer snapping a picture of Homer Santa taking a very generous bite out of said donut and the kid doesn’t look too happy.
Oh, that Bart!
From a nearby balcony, Bart, Milhouse (Hayden), and Lewis (Cartwright) are all watching this unfold. None of the kids recognize Homer and they’re poking fun at the kids who actually buy into this Santa grift. Bart dares Milhouse, who appears to be dressed in a Santa suit himself, to sit on his lap, but Milhouse counters with a dare for Bart to yank his beard. Bart, not being one to back down, accepts this dare and makes his way towards Santa. When he’s seated on Homer’s lap, Homer lets out a yelp at the sight of his own kid, but then tries to play it cool by asking him his name. This is where we get another classic Bart line of “I’m Bart Simpson, who the Hell are you?” Homer just growls in response, “I’m jolly old Saint Nick.” Bart declares they’ll just see about that as he gives Homer’s beard a tug and we get another picture shot. This time it’s Homer’s beard being pulled down and a shocked Bart realizing who is in costume here.
This is the most awe Bart will ever have for his father.
Homer scoops up his boy in his arms and angrily storms off to a prop house in the back for a little heart-to-heart. Now is when Homer finally comes clean to someone about his lack of a bonus. Bart is actually impressed with his father and points out how low he’s willing to sink to make sure he and the family have a good Christmas. It’s not the nicest phrasing, but Bart’s smile indicates he’s sincere and Homer seems touched. He then heads back out to resume his duty as the big guy, but after saying “Hi” to all of the children he smacks his head on the door frame and utters some mild profanity which seems to alarm some of the mothers nearby.
Not even in 1989 would 13 bucks get you very far.
With the job done, all that is left to do is collect a big, fat, check! Bart apparently decided to spend the rest of the day at his father’s side as he’s joined him in the line for checks with the other Santas. Homer sees this as an opportunity to teach Bart the value of work, but when he’s handed a check for a meager $13 all of that is ruined. He demands of the teller to explain how his pay was only $13 only to find out they deducted things from his pay like the cost of the suit, training, and other stuff. It was supposed to be a check for over 100 bucks which probably would have done a decent job of acquiring gifts in 1989, but 13 bucks won’t get you anything.
Is Barney Gumble the harbinger of miracles to come?!
Homer, defeated, plops down on a couch while Bart suggests they just head home. Then we hear the voice of Barney offscreen overjoyed at receiving a check for “Thirteen big ones!” Homer doesn’t understand why Barney is so happy only to find out that Barney has plans for this money. He’s heading to the dog track where a can’t miss pup by the name of Whirlwind is fixing to turn this 13 bucks into something more. He encourages Homer to come along, but Homer finds the idea of taking his kid to a sleazy dog track on Christmas Eve rather distasteful. This is when Bart chimes in that this is how all of the Christmas miracles in TV happen. Apparently he’s self aware as he lists off some of television’s miracle benefators at Christmas including Tiny Tim, Charlie Brown, and The Smurfs. Homer seems convinced, and I bet a Season 3 Homer would be enthusiastic about following the lessons taught by TV, but this one just asks “Who’s Tiny Tim?” as they head out.
Well it looks like one Simpsons kid is having a pretty swell Christmas, at least.
At the Simpson house, Patty and Selma are present along with Grandpa (Castellaneta) Simpson for Christmas Eve. They’re watching a Christmas special on TV starring the Happy Little Elves, a sort of parody of The Smurfs seldom seen after the first season. Lisa is reacting to the show in earnest fashion while the adults, mostly Grandpa, can’t stand it. It’s then pointed out by Patty that Homer is late and Marge says he told him that he was going caroling with Bart. This then smash cuts to Barney and Bart singing “We’re in the Money” as they make their way into the dog track. Homer still can’t believe he’s doing this, and that feeling only mounts when he gets a look at Whirlwind and declares the dog a scrawny little bag of bones. Bart, who is now wearing Homer’s Santa hat and looking pretty adorable, points out that all of the dogs are scrawny little bags of bones. There’s also a brief exchange between another father and son where the kid asks if they can open their gifts now with the dad retorting “You know the tradition son, not until the 8th race.” It’s hilariously sad.
Bart’s not a very bright kid, but he still may be smarter than his father.
As Barney makes his way to the counter to place his bet, a voice (Shearer) comes over the loudspeaker to announce that number 8 is being replaced with a new dog: Santa’s Little Helper. Homer hears this name and thinks it’s a sign. He expresses his enthusiasm towards Bart who tells his father it’s just a coincidence. Even when they get the odds on the dog, 99 to 1, Homer still isn’t dismayed. He sees it as an opportunity, but Bart informs him that he has a bad feeling about this. Homer basically begs his son to trust in him because it’s all he has and Bart decides to go along so as to spare his father’s feelings. There’s no changing his dad’s mind anyway as he bets it all on Santa’s Little Helper.
Lisa with a very smart defense of her father. If only he could have been there to hear it.
Back at the house, everyone is still watching (and not enjoying) The Happy Little Elves. Well, Lisa is, that is until she overhears her aunt Patty refer to her father as a “doofus.” When she asks her aunt what she said, Patty just nonchalantly informs her that she’s just trashing her father. Lisa then, rather calmly, sticks up for her father, “Well, I wish you wouldn’t, because aside from the fact that he has the same frailties as all human beings he is the only father I have. Therefore, he is my model of manhood and my estimation of him will govern the prospects of my adult relationships so I hope that you bare in mind that any knock at him is a knock at me and I am far too young to defend myself against such onslaughts.” Patty has nothing to say aside from “Watch your cartoon, dear.” She put that old bat in her place!
Well, at least they’re only out 13 bucks.
It’s race time down at the track and Homer and Bart are up against the railing to take it all in. Homer encourages Bart to kiss the ticket for good luck and then the dogs are off! The two enthusiastically cheer on their chosen champion until it’s announced that he’s currently in last place, and pretty far back at that. Bart just tries to tell his dad that this is when the miracle happens and the two resume their cheering and are hooting and hollering as…Whirlwind crosses the finish line. Bart is dumbfounded and can only conclude that television has been lying to him. Homer bangs his head on the railing, a terrific use of foley, and then says he doesn’t want to leave until their dog finishes. The shot holds for a solid 3 seconds or so before Homer gives up and says they can leave. That’s probably my favorite joke in the whole episode.
So is Daria a girlfriend? Prostitute? Some random girl Barney met at the track?
Out in the parking lot, Homer and Bart are picking up discarded tickets and hoping to stumble upon an accidentally discarded winner. They’re soon interrupted by Barney who comes driving by in a convertible, on Christmas Eve, in a cold climate. It’s a choice, but he’s in the money! He doesn’t seem to know that Homer didn’t follow his advice as he just asks “What did I tell ya – Whirlwind!” He then burps and says to his lady friend “Let’s go, Daria.” For years, many fans insisted that Barney said “diarrhea” instead of Daria, but once the DVDs came out we could see for certain that he was saying Daria. I, for one, always heard Daria.
Welcome to the family, boy.
With Barney gone and no winning tickets found, Homer and Bart hang their heads and presumably start heading for the car. They then hear shouting as an angry voice declares “You came in last for the last time!” We don’t know it now, but the voice belongs to Les Moore (Azaria) and he’ll return in a future episode. For now, all we need to know about him is that he’s the present owner of Santa’s Little Helper and he no longer wants to be. Bart points the dog out as he races across the parking lot and leaps into Homer’s arms! Bart immediately asks if they can keep him, but Homer is still mad at this dog for coming in last. He starts trying to justify why they shouldn’t keep him, “But he’s a loser! He’s pathetic! He’s…” and then the dog licks him and Homer smiles, “…a Simpson.” Gets me every time.
Always deliver the bad new first.
One last trip to 742 Evergreen Terrace is in order. At this point, Grandpa has fallen asleep, the cartoon is way past over, and Patty and Selma are frothing at the mouth waiting to see what state Homer eventually returns in. Marge is just wondering if she should call the police when the door opens and Homer enters. He announces that he has a confession to make, and Patty and Selma get real excited at this. He starts to detail how he didn’t get his bonus, and that he tried to keep it from ruining their Christmas, but he doesn’t get to finish his sad speech as Bart come bursting in with a “Look what we got!”
Aww, he’s kissing the baby!
It’s Santa’s Little Helper, and basically everyone gets excited at the news. Well, except Patti and Selma who seem disappointed that Homer didn’t fail. Lisa declares that love at first sight is real while Bart adds that if he runs away he’ll be easy to catch. Marge adds a “God bless him” in her husband’s direction and tells him this is the best gift that he could possibly give them. Homer can only respond with “It is?” as Marge explains to him that it’s something to express their love. Lisa then asks what the dog’s name is and Homer says, “Number 8 – I mean, Santa’s Little Helper.” The picture gimmick is used for a third time to make a sort of Simpsons Christmas card that reads “Merry Christmas from The Simpsons” and I just love how even Grandpa looks thrilled about the dog.
It may be corny, but I do enjoy the Christmas card ending.
It’s not over though! As the credits roll, the family gathers around to sing “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer” with Grandpa at the piano. Maggie races back and forth on the back of the new family dog while everyone else sings. Bart, in a callback to how this thing started, does the school yard thing of interjecting comments between the verse. “You would even say it glows – like a light bulb!” This angers Homer, and even Lisa gets in on it. Marge tells Homer to take it away and solo the part of Santa Claus asking Rudolph to guide his sleigh, but Homer doesn’t know the words and makes them up, “Rudolph with your nose over here, so you can guide my sleigh…today.” Grandpa adds a disappointed “Oh Homer.” The song finishes with Bart trying to liken Rudolph to Attila the Hun, but he doesn’t finish the line due to his father strangling him, which we don’t actually see as it’s just a shot of the home’s exterior.
Even Patty and Selma look like they’re having a good time.
That’s how the very first Simpsons Christmas special, and very first episode overall, ends. It’s not just a Christmas Special, but a pretty monumental episode of television because The Simpsons has become such a cultural institution over the years. It’s pretty crazy that it all started here. Showrunner Al Jean has floated the idea of whenever it comes time to do a final episode that it should end where this one begins creating one big loop. That would be appropriate for a show that routinely ignores the passage of time and even changes the past to suit the current era. Homer and Marge began the show as baby boomers and are now considered millennials. I can recall being excited when I reached Bart’s age and now I’m Homer’s. That’s nuts!
As Christmas Specials go, this one borrows a little bit from Christmas Vacation. The patriarch, in this case Homer, wants the family to have a great Christmas, but when his company fails to pay out a bonus that’s become an expected part of his income each year it throws a wrench into everything. For Clark Griswald, it manifests as anxiety throughout the film until the big payoff. The problem is then righted by the bonus getting restored, and then some. For Homer, no such miracle occurs, but he at least falls ass backwards into an unwanted dog which serves as the family’s Christmas present that year. We don’t see the kids wake up to an empty tree on Christmas morning, but they can be assumed to have done so. Well, actually Bart got some paper and Maggie a chew toy which I suppose went to Santa’s Little Helper. It’s probably a good thing that the special ends where it does.
Maybe not a miracle, but this one worked out for the Simpsons thanks to this very good boy.
As an episode of The Simpsons, this very early episode contains some of the sarcastic elements we’d find in later seasons, but the pacing is definitely slower. Scene transitions are mostly of the fade in and fade out model and very little of what we see would be deemed outrageous. There are still plenty of hallmarks in place though that will remain so for the show’s duration. Homer tends to respond with violence towards his son and there’s never been any love lost between he and his sisters-in-law. Other stuff is changed though like Ned Flanders being more of a rival to just a true annoyance with a religious component. Principal Skinner is also a rather poor public speaker as he mixes up words and that was going to be a gimmick for him that was dropped. And obviously the overall look of the show has changed quite a bit over the years.
I do love all of the Season One oddities, like this lady with no nose seated behind Marge.
I do love this one, partly because I love The Simpsons, but also because it’s a relatable look at a lower middle class Christmas and how easy it is for the holiday to go wrong. I mentioned how it’s a bit surprising that the show is willing to essentially confirm that Santa isn’t real and that’s because the show became such a hit with children in the months that followed. And the show has never gone back on that either. While the show did avoid Christmas for years after this episode feeling they couldn’t really top it, when the show eventually got back into the Christmas Spirit the subject of Santa was never really addressed. Bart doesn’t see Santa as a way to get Bonestorm, we don’t see evidence of him being there and delivering a fire truck, and so on. And that’s fine, not every show need pander to the children, but it does cross my mind every time I watch this episode with my own kids who are still, just barely, in the believe zone.
If you would like to view this holiday classic this year then the easiest way to do so is via Disney+. The Simpsons is on-demand there and Disney even organizes all of the Christmas episodes in one spot. I believe the show also still airs on FXX or FX which will show all of the Christmas episodes this month. The episode is also part of the fist season which is available on DVD and usually for pretty cheap since it’s no one’s favorite season. There’s also an out of print Simpsons Christmas DVD out there that also usually isn’t too expensive. Society agrees that this one is a classic so getting it on your TV should be rather painless.
Can’t wait until tomorrow for more Christmas? Check out what we had to say on this day last year and beyond:
Alvin and the Chipmunks is one of the oldest, family-owned, pieces of intellectual property left in the world. And it might not be for much longer as the franchise is reportedly up-for-sale and has been since last year, but as-of this writing nothing has been agreed upon. The Chipmunks date back to the 1958 novelty…
For December 10, we are returning to the theme of this year which is to revisit the best of the best. When I originally ranked my favorite Christmas specials, I had the recently released It’s a SpongeBob Christmas! ranked at #19. The years have been kind to this throwback Christmas special as last year I…
Come the 1990s, the cartoon juggernaut known as Hanna-Barbera was fading. It’s said the company once had control of approximately 80% of the children’s programming on television and even come 1990 it was still around 20%. The studio’s last big hit had been The Smurfs which set all kinds of Saturday morning records despite few…
We’re back with the fourth, and final, review of the inaugural wave of Super7 Ultimates! from The Simpsons. And today, you’re getting a two for one as we’re looking at two figures: Robot Itchy and Robot Scratchy. This pair hails from the Season 6 episode “Itchy & Scratchy Land” which was one part Westworld and one part Disneyland parody. In it, the titular family takes a trip to the theme park that Bart is dead serious about attending, Itchy & Scratchy Land. Now, this is yet another “controversial” release from Super7 as we’re getting the robotic duo before the more traditional cartoon pair. It’s an odd pull for the first wave of a toyline, but that’s Super7. They zig when others zag. This duo does have the advantage of being another episode specific release and I’m on record as being in favor of that approach. Would I like just a regular Itchy and Scratchy? Sure, but I also get a kick out of these and it’s something different. And ultimately, no pun intended, we have to review the figures for what they are so set aside your beliefs on character selection and join me in taking a deep dive into these two figures.
Super7 basically maximized the space in this box.
Customary episode info on the back. Look at Itchy, isn’t he so cheeky concealing that knife behind his back?
Now, you may think that these two figures share a lot of the same parts. And if you did you would be wrong. I probably could have split them up, but the engineering is essentially the same and they share a lot of accessories, even if the actual figure molds are different. Both figures comes in the same Ultimates! box the others come in with artwork from the show and a little note on where these guys hail from. These two definitely take up a lot more real estate in the box versus their line-mates with only Homer really coming close to that sort of presence. These are pretty big figures with Scratchy being the tallest figure in the line so far. He comes in at around 7.5″ to the top of his head and about 8″ to the tip of his ears. Itchy is 6.5″ to the top of the head and 7.5″ to the top of his ears. What really makes them look big though is their heads which are just massive relative to the other figures. The torso is very boxy as well which adds to the bulk, though they’re not that heavy. That likely owes to the torso being relatively hollow and the legs are quite thin. That’s not to say they’re light or feel cheap, but the weight is definitely not evenly distributed as they both have heavy heads and light bodies.
Of course, you can’t have Itchy without Scratchy.
Even in robot form, Scratchy doesn’t get to inflict much harm upon Itchy.
We’ll start with Itchy first since he always comes first when the duo is brought up. These two figures do not share a single part as far as I can tell. The arms and legs on both figures essentially look the same, but everything about Scratchy is noticeably bigger. Super7 probably could have fudged it and told us to deal with it, but they didn’t and that’s something I definitely appreciate. The heads, like all of the heads in this line, are fully painted. They’re sculpted on gray, but painted over, which gives them a nice finish. Itchy’s really well sculpted. The inner ear is painted purple, the teeth a shiny silver, and the white and red paint on the eyes is very cleanly applied. I like that the pupils are recessed which gives them a nice touch. The nose is also painted a gray-purple. The hair effects are glued in and the only other seems present is the one circling his dome which is part of the design of the character so it’s fine.
Commence with the screaming.
The rest of the figure is, unfortunately, mostly bare plastic. It gives the body a different finish than the head and a far cheaper look. Super7 did paint the bolts on the front of the chest and the abdomen has some of the gray paint applied as well. Unfortunately, the bolts on the side of the figure are not painted. That’s in keeping with the look of the show, but Super7 seemed to decide the front of the figure needed another hit of paint on those bolts so why not do the same with the other bolts? Aside from the lack of paint, the sculpt looks mostly good. The arms look like they could have been bendy arms, but Super7 opted to go in a more traditional manner. This means the articulation lines look a bit off, but they’re not bad and I prefer this route over the bendy arm approach. The sculpt is there, it’s the finish that holds it back.
That’s what makes robots work.
With Scratchy, we pretty much have the same situation. The head is well-painted and well-sculpted. There’s little to no slop or bleeding on the edges and the seems are all really clean. Like Itchy, he has some silver paint apps on the chest with the bolts across the top and this big cap in the middle. His abdomen is not painted, but it’s also not supposed to be so I can’t knock it for that. He’s bigger than Itchy though so the lack of paint anywhere else stands out more. The torso looks especially bland and the larger tail on the figure is practically begging for some shading somewhere. He even has a wheel at the base of his tail, a detail I never noticed until this figure, but it’s not painted so it’s just a lump on his tail. Super7 has a great sculpt here, but they’re letting it down with the lack of paint.
They can handle these weapons okay.
For articulation, we can basically talk about both at once because the engineering is exactly the same. The heads are on a hinged ball peg, but it does almost nothing. The hinge is really tight, but even if you loosen it up, the oversized heads means there’s not really much room for them to do anything except look up. There’s really no tilt or room to look down, but you do get rotation. The hinged shoulders rotate just fine and they can come out to just about horizontal. I could probably force it, but I don’t want to break my toys. At the elbow, we have the standard swivel and hinge combo that won’t get you a 90 degree bend. Their arms are basically tubes so the swivel is useless. The wrists swivel and hinge and the hinge is actually built into the arm so you effectively can hinge the hand in any direction so that’s an added bonus of this slightly unconventional approach. There’s no articulation in the torso, but since it’s a box I wouldn’t expect any. The waist does twist and the hips just swivel forward and back. Because of the design, they kick all the way forward and back, but you get no split articulation. The knees are also just hinges, though they can hinge in both directions as far as you want because there’s no knee cap or anything else to get in the way. The ankles just hinge forward and back, but the range is pretty limited there and there’s no ankle rocker. The tail on each figure can rotate and hinge, though the hinge is fairly limited. Scratchy’s tail essentially functions as a third leg which is nice to have as the leg hinges aren’t the strongest. They’re not loose, but the top-heavy nature of each figure does mean you have to be mindful of how they’re posed or else they might topple over.
Unfortunately, they’re not really cut out for firearms.
When it comes to accessories, these figures are pretty loaded, though we do have a lot of repeat accessories between the two. For starters, both figures come with some extra hands. Itchy has a set of open hands and a set of “gripping” hands. Their hands are a unique design so they’re not traditional at all, but they seem to get the job done. Scratchy has a set of the open hands, but only one hand that I’d call a gripping hand. It’s odd that he didn’t get two of those. Both figures also have an alternate head. As far as I can tell, the alternate head is exactly the same as the standard head, the only difference is they’re not glued at the seems. This is so Itchy can lift the top of his head off to expose his circuits and Scratchy can remove his face to do the same. Both are references to the episode they’re from. And the innards are well-painted and well-sculpted. The pieces fit together pretty well too. I had to work at it initially, but leaving them in place helped to better form-fit them in place. That’s all to say they look exactly the same when assembled so I’m surprised Super7 even bothered with the glued heads. I guess the added cost to the figure is just raw materials since it’s all tooled already, but it’s a surprise all the same. Only one of my pictures (not included the boxed shots) features the default heads as I’d rather keep the ones that separate on them and you should be able to see how well the pieces fit together.
You may need to get a bit creative with the chainsaw.
For the accessories the two do share, we have a tiny arsenal and some rather common implements of destruction associated with the pair. Both come with an oversized, red-brown, mallet. The “gripping” hands work fine with the handles, but two-handed poses are a real challenge. The mallets aren’t painted, but they do have a nice, satin, finish so they look pretty nice. The pair also each come with an axe. They work just as well as the mallet as far as holding things and the axe head is nicely painted with a shiny silver and a red blade. It’s the same as the mallet as far as how it’s handled so it works just as well, and just as bad, I suppose. They also each have a tommy gun, though Scratchy has a hard time holding that one properly and Itchy isn’t much better. You can finagle it into their hands, but not in a realistic manner. I know we’re talking about a cartoon, robot, cat, and mouse, but they should be able to aim the gun. The gun itself is like the mallet in that it’s just plastic, but it has a nice finish so I’m not bothered by the lack of paint. The chainsaw is another accessory that Itchy has an easier time wielding than Scratchy. Neither can wield it particularly well as they just don’t have the clearance in the arms, but it can be fudged a bit more convincingly than the gun. The chainsaw itself has a nice, shiny, paint job on the metallic portion with red on the main housing. It looks nice, though I wish the handle on the top was a bit more pronounced and usable like the handle on the rear, but it’s fine.
The drum hangs too low, but at least it looks nice.
Those are the shared accessories, but both also come with some unique ones as well. For Itchy, he has a wearable drum and two mallets for striking the drum. It looks really nice though. It’s red with gold trim and it’s done rather well. The face of the drum is painted with a light blue and has a cartoon Scratchy head on it that is probably printed, but I suppose could be painted on. Either way, it’s nice and sharp and it definitely catches the eye. The mallets are rather basic, just a beige handle with an oversized, off-white, top. They’re fine and Itchy holds them well so no complaints there. The only thing I don’t like is it hangs a bit lower than I’d like. I wish it could hook onto his torso somehow to sit higher as more than half of the drum sits lower than his crotch. Overall, it looks all right and I think the drum by itself looks great, but it is slightly ruined by the fit.
Sure, the baby axe is cute, but it can’t stand so it’s like petting a cat: What’s the point?
With Scratchy, we get some unique stuff as well. Scratchy has a butcher’s knife which slots well into his “gripping” hand. It has a nice, shiny, blade and looks nice for what it is. I like that it is sized appropriately for the figure and doesn’t look dinky in his hand. I also like that it can be used with Moe or any other figure for that matter. Scratchy also comes with the robot baby axe from the parade scene. It looks like the regular axe only smaller and with painted metallic legs. Unfortunately, Super7 went cheap on this one as the legs are not articulated. And since it’s a straight up and down design for the most part it doesn’t stand well. The legs do not sit flush on a surface so it feels rather pointless as a result, which is a shame because it was a good idea, just poor execution. Lastly, Scratchy comes with what I think will unquestionably be the accessory of the year. I’m, of course, talking about the much in-demand BORT license plate. It’s a simple, white, rectangle with “BORT” sculpted onto it and painted red with Itchy & Scratchy Land on top of the plate. It looks awesome for what it is and it’s a tremendous inclusion as it references one of the best bits to ever appear on an episode of The Simpsons. If I am to nitpick it, it’s not to scale with the figures as the vanity plates in the episode were much smaller, but I don’t care. BORT license plates for everyone!
Behold! The most sought after vanity plate in all existence!
Robot Itchy and Scratchy are pretty much on par with the rest of the line. The sculpts are pretty great, there’s some missing paint apps which detract from the look and the articulation is mediocre at best. The high accessory count, and some fun inclusions, do help add value to the total package which is $55 a piece. These two are a bit interesting in that their sculpts are quite possibly the best in the line so far, but the missing paint on the bodies stands out more to me. I think Super7 did a great job in isolating what made this particular episode of the show so fun. As always, they could have done more like add some blood spraying effects or something (especially in place of the extra head), but the execution isn’t matching the imagination from those who designed the product. The baby axe being a total dud is a bummer and Scratchy only having the one “gripping” hand is an odd choice. I don’t think the gun or chainsaw pose well with the figures, but they also have enough other stuff that it’s not that big of a deal. If they weren’t so expensive, they would work well as army builder figures since there are quite a bit of display options available. And even though the articulation isn’t great, they do match the movements and poses of their animated counterparts better than some of the other figures I’ve received from Super7.
Well, that’s a wrap on Wave One of The Simpsons Ultimates! It’s not without its flaws, but overall I’d call it a success.
Ultimately, pun definitely intended, how much you like this pair will come down to how much you like The Simpsons, how much you like this particular episode, and the design of the two robots. I love the episode, and I find the design of the Itchy and Scratchy robots to be fun, so I like these enough. I think they could be better, and Super7 is pushing it at their current price levels, but I don’t regret the purchase. These are pretty fun, but definitely for a niche audience, so buy accordingly.
Need to catch-up on the rest of The Simpsons Ultimates! from Super7?
Slowly but surely I am clearing out all of the action figure preorders I placed in the year 2021. Of the ones that had been remaining, the line I was most looking forward to experiencing was the line of Super7 Ultimates! based on The Simpsons. It was August of 2021 when these suckers went up…
Our first two looks at the inaugural wave of Ultimates! from Super7 based on The Simpsons have been two very episode specific takes. One was Deep Space Homer from the episode of the same name where Homer went to space and the figure presents the character in his space suit. The second figure was Poochie,…
We’re back with another look at a figure from Super7’s latest wave of Ultimates! based on The Simpsons. And for this one, we’re taking things TO THE EXTREME! That’s right, it’s Poochie, everyone’s favorite rockin’ dog. He’s got attitude to spare and he’s not afraid to show it off. Where would cartoon history be without…
“It’s a Flaming Moe! I’m Moe, I’m the one who invented it!”
Our first two looks at the inaugural wave of Ultimates! from Super7 based on The Simpsons have been two very episode specific takes. One was Deep Space Homer from the episode of the same name where Homer went to space and the figure presents the character in his space suit. The second figure was Poochie, a more-or-less one-off character (yes, I know he’s made cameos since) from a very memorable episode of the show’s last, great, season. Today, we’re getting what one might call a generic release, or an evergreen interpretation of a popular character from the show and that’s the bartender Moe Szyslak. Super7 basically laid it out when the first lineup was announced that they’re not that interested in doing the generic versions of the characters like Homer in his white shirt and blue pants, Marge in her green dress, and so on. At the time, it struck me as a bold decision, but as the line has been announced and the first wave has arrived it’s really started to make sense to me why an episode-specific approach is the way to go. The Simpsons is a show that will hit 800 episodes at the end of it’s current production order. If you’re sitting down to do a character that has appeared in even 100 episodes, let alone 800, it’s really hard to narrow down on how to present that character. However, when you distill that character down to a single episode appearance, well then it becomes more manageable. And ultimately, we remember and identify with the show through it’s most iconic lines, references, and yes, episodes. If I have Homer just standing there on my shelf then cool, it’s Homer. If I have Homer in a space suit, well then I’m thinking of jokes about carbon rods and alien, ant, overlords. It’s more rewarding for me. It’s not without its risks. What if they pick an episode I don’t care about? And even if it’s an episode I do like, there’s still a good chance that there’s an episode I like better. “Homer at the Bat,” “Mr. Plow,” basically any Treehouse appearance – all probably options I’d take over Deep Space Homer.
It’s rare to see Moe look so happy.
Now that’s more like it. Moe like it?
It’s not my toy line though. I’m not making them, and I respect Super7 for laying out their approach early and making what they want. As consumers, we either agree or disagree and vote with our wallets, so let’s talk about Moe, shall we? On the back of the box for each of the first two releases in the wave I noted we got the episode info from which the figure came from. With Moe, it’s episode number 1 “Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire” because that was his first appearance. However, this figure is not from that episode as early versions of Moe looked a little different from the character he’d become. He had black hair and a pink apron, where as the show ended up settling on a gray-haired look and a blue…well, we’ll get to the apron in a minute. It was probably a good move to adopt this version of Moe for the figure, and it would have just been confusing to not list out his first appearance in this look, but this figure is a solid reminder that Moe has been with us since the beginning.
“Hey! Hey! I may be ugly and hate-filled but, I’ve, umm, what was the third thing you said?”
Moe stands at approximately 6.625″ to the top of his head and just a tick under 7″ to the top of his hair. His default portrait is his neutral expression, which is almost a scowl. I love Moe’s design because it’s very Season One. Following that season, they really didn’t design characters that look like Moe with his sloping forehead and excessive overbite. Like Homer, his head looks to be sculpted in yellow plastic, but also painted over to give it a matte finish. The gray of his hair looks to be a separately molded piece that’s also painted over to preserve that finish. Unlike Homer, his eyes are cleanly painted which is a surprise because they look like they’d be harder to paint than Homer’s, but it’s nice to see there’s no slop and bleeding edges. The neck is part of the head sculpt and it’s secured inside the shirt so there’s a nice seamless approach to whole situation up there. It’s exactly the approach I wanted from Super7, but wasn’t sure they’d actually take, so I’m very pleased here.
I don’t like how they did the shoulders which actually doesn’t look as bad under the harsh lighting here as it does in hand.
At the torso, we switch to the more traditional colored plastic with little to no paint approach we’re used to with Super7. Moe’s light blue shirt is all molded plastic with no paint hits. The only paint is the navy blue bowtie. The sleeves are where things threaten to go off the rails a bit. The entire arm, including the sleeve, is molded in yellow and the sleeves are painted blue. Super7 did a good job of matching the shade of blue to the torso, but what they didn’t do well is actually cover-up all of the yellow. For some reason, and it seems to be fairly consistent with other Moe figures, the right shoulder has some yellow peeking through at the hinge. And it even mixes a bit with the blue to leave a greenish hue there and it’s unsightly. Why didn’t they just do the sleeve and the arm in two pieces? We’ll get to it in the articulation, but they could have just plugged the bicep into the sleeve and it would have allowed them to mold the sleeve in blue. I can’t imagine they couldn’t have fit such a small piece onto the same mold as the torso so it’s really puzzling why this approach was taken. It’s less of an issue with the left shoulder, for some reason, though that one has a scuff on it. It feels like an unforced error and it’s one of those oversights that makes you wonder what the approach is when they’re planning these out? The rest of the aesthetics are mostly fine. The pants are molded in a slate gray with a clear coat applied to take the shine off, though there’s portions where the stuff didn’t quite take so he has some shiny spots. The feet are a darker gray with a stripe of white paint for the socks. It’s not super clean, but it’s in a tight spot and not plainly visible. The bare portions of the arms are just molded plastic without any sort of a coating and they, unfortunately, are rather shiny. It’s a bit frustrating when most of the figure is matte, save for one obvious place.
So he has this crate that can kind of fake being a bar, but his look is definitely missing something that should be pretty obvious to fans of the show.
Despite some of these shortcomings, overall Moe looks like, well, Moe! He’s very onmodel and I think they nailed the likeness. The only thing missing is the apron. Where’s Moe’s apron?! He rarely is shown in this attire without it. I guess this is Moe reading to the homeless, or it would be if he had his copy of Little Women. The figure was solicited with a soft goods apron, and according to Super7, it was a screw up on their end. They didn’t go into specifics so we don’t know exactly what happened. I’m guessing soft goods are handled by a separate facility and shipped to the factory for packaging. Either they got there and were overlooked by the factory, or maybe they were late and Super7 decided to ship them anyway. The line was already quite behind schedule so I can see not wanting to hold things up for an apron, but it is pretty essential to the character’s look. Apparently there’s nothing to fear though as Super7 has said the aprons are on the way to their warehouse, and once in hand, they’ll ship them to everyone who ordered a Moe through them. For those who ordered the figure elsewhere, you’re encouraged to reach out with proof of purchase to get added to a list. This isn’t the first time something like this has happened with a Super7 release so I’m not concerned about them not upholding their end of the bargain. We just have to wait, and once in-hand, I’ll update this review accordingly (and I did, just skip ahead to the end if you want to hear about the apron).
Also missing is the bug from the pickled eggs jar, but I think we can forgive them for that one. Or should Super7 mail everyone a tiny spider?
With that out of the way, let’s get to the low point of the review: articulation. Homer was pretty limited, and Poochie rather poor in this department, so I’m not expecting much out of Moe. In his favor, Moe has a pretty simple design so getting basic articulation shouldn’t be an issue, but it seems this is always an adventure with Super7. Moe’s head is on a double-ball peg which connects at the base of the neck. He can rotate, but his stooped posture means it’s not really a side-to-side rotation. He can’t look to the side without also looking up. He can look down okay, but he can’t look up from a straight-ahead position. He does get some nice nuance posing, and the rotation feels nice and smooth. At the shoulders, things get a bit weird. He can raise his arms out to the side just past horizontal, so that’s good. His arms though are pinned in at an angle, so he can’t rotate all the way around freely. It’s the weirdest thing. I’ve never had a modern figure fight me at the shoulder like this one does. You can force the issue, but it feels like I’m doing something the figure doesn’t want me to do. At the bicep, we have nothing. I mentioned it in the aesthetics, but it’s odd they didn’t just peg the arm into the sleeve to get a swivel there. At the elbow, we do have a swivel and it works okay. The single hinge can hit 90 degrees and it can even bend back a little, which is weird and probably not useful, but I figured I’d mention it. The wrists swivel and hinge horizontally and they’re fine.
For those not into the hate-filled and suicidal side of Moe, we have this headsculpt!
In the torso, we get the diaphragm joint that Super7 has been trying to implement for a few waves now. And here, it’s like most of their attempts in that it’s not particularly functional. Moe can rotate, but there’s no forward and back and no side-to-side either. There’s a waist twist below that which feels redundant. If they can’t do anything with the diaphragm joint, then why have it? It just breaks up the sculpt. I’m more than willing to sacrifice a small amount of sculpt to get articulation there, but if Super7 can’t figure it out then don’t bother because Moe is not a character that needs rotation there when he has rotation at the waist. With the apron, this will matter less. At the hips, we have ball and socket joints that let Moe damn near hit a split, so that’s great. He can’t kick forward all the way, but probably enough for Moe. There’s no range going back, and there’s really no thigh swivel. We get a tiny bit at the joint, but not enough to be considered a true point of articulation. The single-hinged knees can almost hit a 90 degree bend. There is a swivel there, but as we saw with Poochie, Super7 is using a rounded cut to try to hide the articulation a bit more and it basically kills the range on the swivel rendering it useless. It’s not really needed anyway since he has a swivel at the ankle and a hinge. The hinge goes back a bit, but has no range forward. And like Homer, there’s no ankle rocker. Why?! Why get rid of that?
And for everyone else, we have this beautiful face!
So the articulation isn’t great. Is it better than Homer and Poochie? I guess? His design is so simple that it makes the range on most of the joints work better and Super7 largely avoided any unsightly joints. It could still be better though and I have no idea why they did the shoulders the way they did. I’m guessing there just wasn’t room because of how low his head sits in the body so they angled the pins, but it sucks. The diaphragm joint is useless and the ankles are terrible. He can only handle the most basic and vanilla of poses. As was the case with the others, you will need the accessories to sell the scene if you’re trying to recreate something because the figure just isn’t capable of a whole lot.
“As usual, a knife-wielding maniac has shown us the way.”
And with Moe, the accessories are going to be an issue. Not really that any are bad, but that there’s just so much he could have come with that it’s almost impossible for Super7 to please everybody. Even if you’re happy with what he does have, there’s probably something you miss or would have swapped in favor of something else, but let’s get into it and discuss that after. For hands, Moe is pretty well stocked as he has a set of fists hands, gripping hands, pointing hands, and relaxed hands. As was the case with the other two, the fists might be the most useless while the others are plenty useful. It would have been nice to get at least one trigger-finger hand since Moe is fond of robbing people. He doesn’t come with any guns, but other figures do. For heads, we have the stoic head he comes bundled with plus his smiling head from the Duff calendar shoot. It’s well painted, especially the eyes, and well sculpted, but not something I’ll ever display. The other head is his ugly, raging, screaming, head and it too is well sculpted and well painted.They even captured his missing tooth which I think Matt Groening hates, if I’m not mistaken, and is something the show phased out over the years. This is Moe at his most ugly and hate-filled and a true contender for shelf material.
“You jerks haven’t paid your tab! Out!”
“And you freaks can beat it too!”
To go along with the raging head we get Moe’s phone. Everyone remembers Bart’s crank calls from the early years of the show that always sent Moe into a rage. The phone is sculpted all in red plastic with a white number pad that oddly only features 9 digits (that could very well be true to the show). The cord is flexible and the receiver slots in nice and tight on the base. I have a few phone accessories from other companies, and this one is every bit as good as those. Moe can hold the receiver with either the relaxed hand or for a tighter grasp, the gripping hand. Moe also has his trusty wash rag which he can either grip or have dangle off the ends of the fingers on his relaxed hands. It’s not soft goods and looks fine. Moe also comes with a mug of his signature drink: The Flaming Moe. Or is it the Flaming Homer? Since it comes with Moe, I guess he won. It’s done in translucent plastic with a purple insert to represent the beverage and then streaming from the top is translucent orange plastic for the flaming effect the drink is known for. What’s missing is “Moe’s” from the mug which is often featured on the mugs from his bar but the neat thing is the insert is removable so it can be an empty. It’s cool though and it’s an accessory I’ve been displaying with Homer more than Moe. We also get a jar of pickled eggs, because you need these onhand just in case Aerosmith is in your bar or you need to draw eggs to determine a designated driver. No black egg is visible, but the jar looks good using translucent, green, plastic with molded eggs inside. I wish they had filled it with something to better make it look like the eggs are actually in a liquid, but it’s fine. It’s also missing the bug which was in the solicitation, but I guess it either wasn’t worth the price/effort or the factory missed it. Everyone is demanding to know where’s Moe’s apron, well I want to know where is the bug?!
“Aww crap, they’re onto us! Out! Out!”
The last accessory is the most “out there” and it’s the panda from the episode “Cape Feare.” Lisa accuses Moe of sending Bart threatening letters, but she doesn’t actually say what she’s accusing him of, and Moe thinks she’s threatening to blow open his exotic animal smuggling ring. This prompts Moe to release a bunch of pandas from his bar and we get a panda and crate to mark that episode. The crate is pretty damn big, roughly 3 x 5 x 2.875″ and it’s made out of sculpted, brown, plastic, with a silver plastic front that latches. Dangling from that is a padlock which doesn’t do anything, but looks nice. On the side is an “up” arrow and some Chinese characters from the show which allegedly say something to the effect of “This side up.” I say allegedly only because I can’t verify that for myself on account of the fact that I can’t read these. And for inside the crate we have a panda. It’s a simply articulated figure that has a ball-jointed head and swivels at each leg. The head can look up and swivel, but gets very little side-to-side and no range looking down. The leg swivels are pretty useless and this figure is more of a slug figure than anything, but it didn’t need to be anything special. The little paint in use is applied cleanly and the panda looks cute.
“Aww, don’t get on the box!”
That’s a substantial spread of accessories for Moe, and the crate and panda contain a lot of plastic on their own. Still, hard not to think about what could have been? I like the panda, but I look at that crate and think maybe we should have just got what Moe is most associated with – his bar! A little bar display to put the figure behind would have been awesome. Or maybe instead of the panda and crate we could have got the love tester? I’d have made that change, but it’s not my company. And we’re also missing the most obvious – beer! No bottles of duff or even Red Tick Beer? Some extra mugs or spilled beer effects would have been cool, though probably would have needed a bar to be on. We are getting a Duffman in Wave Two so I guess we’ll get some beer then, though it remains to be seen if any of the cans on his belt are removable. I still think a chunk of the bar made way more sense than the panda and his crate and it would setup to get a Barney who could have come with a barstool. Or a tap. It just feels like there’s no forward thinking with Super7, especially with this line. I want to see logical pairs in the character selection, but we get Moe Wave One with no Barney (I guess Duffman is a Moe-adjacent character) in sight. Krusty is in Wave Two, but no Mel or Sideshow Bob has been announced. Burns is in Wave Three, but no Smithers in the just announced Wave Four which also is the fourth wave to not feature a female character. That’s legitimately shocking as Super7 has said in the past they prioritize diversity where they can specifically sighting wanting to have a female in every wave of their Power Rangers line. To have four announced waves from The Simpsons without even one of the female leads getting a figure (Homer is getting his second figure in Wave Four) seems to fly in the face of that. Not to mention there are a bunch of other contenders for figures that happen to be female that they’ve chosen to overlook thus far.
I suppose that’s a topic for another day, for now, we have Moe. Moe has the distinction of being the first of the generic, all-purpose, releases in the line and I think he excels where we would expect and comes up short where we would expect. The missing apron is a bummer as I think it will complete the look of the character, but in terms of sculpt, Moe is great. I have some nitpicks with the paint, and we could debate the accessory selection forever. The same is even true for the alternate portraits. I love the screaming head, but not the smile. Would I want something else? Of course, but I can’t deny the smile is done well and maybe someone else will get more use out of it than me. For me, Moe is likely to scream into his phone for all eternity, but I may occasionally swap to the stoic head when it suits me. And that brings us to the final part of the review – the price. Moe retails for $55 and if you think that’s too much well I can’t really disagree. It’s a lot for a figure like this, but I do feel like Moe comes the closest to justifying the price based on how he turned out and how much stuff he comes with. Others are free to disagree and it’s hard to give a full-throated endorsement when so many retailers have been heavily discounting Super7 Ultimates!, but for me, a big Simpsons fan, I’m happy with this figure and happy to have him. Now just give me Duffman so he has some beer to serve.
Moe can now be fully clothed and still angry.
UPDATE – On June 12th, I finally received Moe’s apron direct from Super7. It’s a simple, fabric, garment with Velcro at the back for the main portion of the apron and for each shoulder strap. It definitely took longer to get here than Super7 initially estimated as it didn’t actually ship until May 31st and then took quite awhile to reach me. It took so long that I had actually reached out to Super7 on the 9th of June to inquire if it had been sent yet and received a response that said “You should have received it by now, we’ll initiate another,” so even they basically thought it wasn’t coming. At any rate, it’s here and Moe does look much better with it on than without. Do the soft goods clash with the otherwise all plastic design? Yeah, a bit, but this is probably better than a plastic apron which would have little to no give. It’s fine, and even though it took awhile, at least it’s here and Super7 took care of the problem which is all one can ask for from a company when something goes wrong.
We’re back with another look at a figure from Super7’s latest wave of Ultimates! based on The Simpsons. And for this one, we’re taking things TO THE EXTREME! That’s right, it’s Poochie, everyone’s favorite rockin’ dog. He’s got attitude to spare and he’s not afraid to show it off. Where would cartoon history be without…
Slowly but surely I am clearing out all of the action figure preorders I placed in the year 2021. Of the ones that had been remaining, the line I was most looking forward to experiencing was the line of Super7 Ultimates! based on The Simpsons. It was August of 2021 when these suckers went up…
Wednesday, August 18th, ended up being quite an eventful little day in the world of toy collecting. There were some reveals from major toy companies, leaks, and even those long neglected Street Sharks fans got something to get excited about late in the day. Personally, it was a good day for me too as I…
We’re back with another look at a figure from Super7’s latest wave of Ultimates! based on The Simpsons. And for this one, we’re taking things TO THE EXTREME! That’s right, it’s Poochie, everyone’s favorite rockin’ dog. He’s got attitude to spare and he’s not afraid to show it off. Where would cartoon history be without Poochie? That’s actually a serious question. The joke of the episode “The Itchy & Scratchy & Poochie Show” is that Poochie is the type of character shows introduce when things are getting stale, the audience is getting bored, and some network executive has a master plan to re-engage the audience. It’s happened in the real world, and The Simpsons poked fun at it with Poochie and via Roy, the joke character added to the family in the same episode. It arrived during Season 8 which was show-run by Bill Oakley and Josh Weinstein. Oakley has explained via the podcast Talking Simpsons that basically everyone on the show around that time thought it was going to end very soon. Animated sitcoms, or animated shows in general, don’t typically go past 100 episodes which The Simpsons had done by then. To basically have fun while the thing flamed out, Oakley and Weinstein set out to “break” the show in some respects by doing these ludicrous episodes. It created some wonderful television via the episode Poochie is from or the frequently memed “22 Short Films About Springfield” episode. It was less successful with “The Principal and the Pauper,” but we don’t need to get into that one.
He’s so in my face!
Because of the episode’s popularity, Poochie is a pretty well known character and the character’s name is basically short-form to explain the concept of a late addition character to a failing show, even though the phenomenon predates Poochie by decades. For casual fans of The Simpsons, maybe it’s a surprise to see Poochie in wave one of a new action figure line, but for a Simpsons diehard like myself it makes perfect sense. Especially considering Super7’s approach to its licensed properties which is often just “We’re going to make our favorite characters because it’s our company and our decision.” That approach can sometimes bite them in the butt, and maybe it will with The Simpsons since they’ve decided not to do standard versions of the family for now, but in this case I’m totally fine with getting a Poochie figure in wave one. He’s as good as a fireworks factory, as far as I’m concerned.
Just try not to get smashed in the face with attitude – you can’t!
Poochie comes in the standard Super7 Ultimates! styled box and, like Deep Space Homer, we get the episode info on the rear of the inner box. Poochie himself is depicted as he was in the show-within-a-show The Itchy & Scratchy & Poochie Show. This means he has a leather jacket, magenta hat, and blue shorts. This differs from his concept art in the episode and some of the marketing images of the character from the episode (and box art for this figure) where he wore jeans and a flannel. It’s funny how that image of Poochie is the one that first comes to mind for me, even though he was depicted very differently when the family was properly introduced to the character via the cartoon. I think I personally like the flannel look to the character as it’s more 90’s to me. The jacketed look screams “The Fonz” and is slightly out of place, though Poochie’s facial hair and hat tie it together. Despite that, I am good with Super7’s decision to go with this version of Poochie as all of his accessories are going to come from his debut cartoon and would be slightly out place with the other design. It’s just too bad the designs were so different that Super7 couldn’t get both looks into a single figure, but that would basically require an entire second figure.
Hey! I hear you guys like boxes!
There is a part of me that wishes we got flannel Poochie. And a set of crossed arms.
Out of the box, Poochie stands at around 5.5″ to the top of his head. This makes him the shortest figure in this first wave and it remains to be seen if the upcoming Bartman will be shorter or not. It’s an odd character to figure for scale since he isn’t a living person in Springfield. About the only scale we have is from the Treehouse of Horror IX segment “The Terror of Tiny Toon” where Bart and Lisa enter an episode of the show. At the end, Itchy and Scratchy emerge from the TV and they’re basically the size of an actual mouse and cat compared with the Simpson family. I suppose Poochie could have been sized as a dog, but it’s not like those Treehouse segments are canon so Super7 just made an executive decision and sized him as he is and I’m fine with it. He only needs to scale with Itchy and Scratchy, assuming Super7 ever makes them.
The scale seems fine with Poochie. He doesn’t technically exist in the same world as the regular occupants of Springfield.
Now, as far as sculpt goes, Poochie looks pretty on-model. He’s a little rounder than he probably should be, but the round dimensions fit the Simpsons overall aesthetic. I do think he should have been slimmer, but it’s not a dealbreaker for me. The portrait is what’s important and his default smile looks nice. Like Homer, his head is sculpted in the appropriate color for his fur, orange, but also painted over to give it a matte appearance. It does contrast a bit with the hands which are bare plastic, but I can understand not wanting to paint hands. The other portions of the head are very clean and I think it’s because we’re dealing with a lot of separate pieces glued together. The paint on the sunglasses is clean as is the nose and goatee. If there’s any paint on the hat, ears, or hair it’s also cleanly applied, though I think we may be dealing with just colored plastic for the black portions. The torso looks to be molded in gray with a clear coat applied to give it a matte appearance. The zippers and white shirt underneath the jacket are painted and done well. The teal fannypack is a separate piece and is a floating belt held on just by pressure, which I do have some concerns about loosening over time. For now, it looks good and stays in place. The lower half is molded in blue and the exposed ankles are painted. It’s really the only part of the figure where the paint gets a bit sloppy, but it’s only noticeable when looking at the figure from below and the orange overrun can be seen on the cuffs of the pants. The sneakers are done rather neatly and overall I’d say he’s a pretty sharp looking figure. If the proportions were just a little more screen-accurate I’d call him damn near perfect. As is, he’s more “very good” as opposed to “excellent.”
He’s quite a bit shorter and chunkier than an average sized Marvel Legends figure and a great deal bigger overall than a smaller scaled line like Plunderlings.
With Homer, the main area of disappointment was the articulation. I think that’s going to be a weakness for the line just given the designs, but I’m hoping for a little better with Poochie who, despite being a dog, should be pretty informative for where the line is going. He has the usual double-ball for the head and he actually get to pair that with a ball-joint at the base of the neck. He rotates well, but the ears get in the way. To get him to look up, you basically have to turn his head to the side so the ears can clear the shoulders. He looks down well, but only gets a minimal amount of tilt when turning his head to the side. Super7 could have put the ears on hinges, or made them softer, but I don’t blame them for not wanting to sacrifice some of the look to get a little added range here. At the shoulders, Poochie can raise his arms out to the side just fine. His arms can’t be positioned perfectly straight though and the single-jointed elbow gives only mediocre range, less than 90 degrees when fully bent. They do swivel there, but lack a true biceps swivel and the shape of the cut makes them cumbersome to fuss with. The hands rotate and hinge in a horizontal fashion. He does feature a waist twist, but it’s more like a pivot as he can’t go very far unless you really want to force it. If this were a free sample I might try that, but since I paid $55 for him I’m not going to push it. The tail is on a ball and hinge and works better than most Super7 tails I’ve encountered. At the hips, we have more ball and socket joints, but the roundness of the lower half and the position of the pegs means he can’t come anywhere close to a split. I don’t know if he even quite hits 45 degrees there. The legs don’t kick forward much, or back, and at the knees we get the single hinge and swivel combo. The cut for the hinge is weird and rounded off so the swivel really doesn’t look good unless it’s in a neutral position. It’s basically the same issue at the elbows. The hinge at least gets close to 90 degrees with the bend, though there’s basically no thigh swivel at the ball joint. The ankles are hinged, but the sneakers prevent much in the way of functional articulation. His foot can go back a little, but not forward at all. There is an ankle rocker, but again, the shape of the sneaker prevents much movement.
The limited articulation and lack of peg holes on the board means he’ll struggle to “surf.”
This is a line I’m not expecting much out of when it comes to articulation, but is it enough with Poochie? In some ways, he’s actually worse than Homer which I didn’t anticipate. They kind of botched the lower half, and where I’m happy about the sacrifices they didn’t make at the head to get more range in, I feel the opposite about the legs. I think they could have done better at the knees and probably should have engineered the feet in a way that produces a better ankle rocker. This guy does come with skateboard and surfboard accessories so having solid range at the ankles is rather important, but they opted not to really try. And it’s weird for as round as he is that his waist twist isn’t better. Which brings me back to the question of “Is it enough?” It’s close, but considering Poochie has some pretty memorable poses from his brief appearances in the show that this figure can’t duplicate, I’m going to have to side with “No.” I don’t think it kills the figure, but it should be better.
At least the board looks nice.
The area the figures in this line are relying on to cover up those articulation shortcomings will be the accessory loadout. Poochie has quite a bit. Some of it is a bit ridiculous, but that’s Poochie. What’s he going to do with a surfboard – I don’t know, but he needs it! And he has one – a big, purple, surfboard. Interestingly enough, this is the third surfboard I have from Super7 and it’s the third unique sculpt. The boards that came with Optimus Prime and Michelangelo aren’t that different, so I’m a little surprised they didn’t reuse one, but credit to them. Or maybe they’re dumb for not doing so and saving a few bucks – I don’t know. Like those two boards though, this one doesn’t have a stand so the presence of the fin on the underside means it’s not very functional. And unlike Prime and Mikey’s boards, there are no pegs on this one so it’s the worst performing of the three. Poochie will do better holding it than he will riding it. And I suppose that’s what he does in the show because Poochie is a poseur – he’s probably never surfed in his life! He can be posed standing beside it with the board placed in a vertical position, but his limited articulation means he can’t carry it under an arm like he did in the show.
Super7 has had a lot of practice when it comes to surfboards.
“Hey Prime! Your board sucks! Ha! I’m so in your face!”
If the waves aren’t your style, there’s also a skateboard. It’s orange, and kind of stubby looking, but it does feature real wheels if that matters to you. It has a peg on it so he can stand on it relatively easy and even do some one-footed poses, so that’s nice. He also has his flying V guitar which is done in a teal that matches his shoes and is well-painted. He doesn’t hold it all that well, but it can be faked a bit. To interact with these various objects, Poochie has some extra hands. He comes with fists in the box, which admittedly aren’t very useful for a character like this, but they can be swapped out with a set of relaxed hands, gripping hands, and “Peace” sign hands. The relaxed hands have the thumb positioned under the hand and not out to the side, so they can function as a loose gripping hand and works well with the guitar. The standard gripping hands are more appreciated than the fists, but surprisingly not that useful. You don’t need them for the guitar, and they’re a little tight for the surfboard. They’re more useful if you want Poochie to hold something that doesn’t come in his box. Poochie also has two extra heads: a smile in which his teeth are visible, and an open mouth. The paint is clean across all three heads, though the open mouth head doesn’t feature any paint inside the mouth so he just has an orange lump where his tongue should be. It’s a different look too as the snout is very round on that head, but flatter on the other two. It’s okay, but far and away my favorite of the three is the smile baring teeth. It’s also a shame none of the heads do anything with his ears so there’s no windswept look to pair with either board which feels like a real miss. Swapping heads isn’t too bad, but swapping hands on this guy sucks. The hands are recessed quite far into his sleeves so getting those fists out was a pain. I had to heat the forearms to loosen them and it was still a challenge. The other hands are much easier to get out since there’s more to grip, but I don’t think I’ll ever put those fists back in after this review is concluded.
Note: Poochie died on the way back to his home planet.
Poochie is a solid release in this inaugural line of figures from The Simpsons and Super7. As an accurate depiction of the source material, I think Poochie isn’t quite as good as Deep Space Homer. His body is a touch off-model and his posing isn’t what it should be. Plus he has some shortcomings with the accessories that shouldn’t be. Does that make Poochie a bad release? No, because the likeness is good enough, the paint is good enough, and it has that fun factor that really only a Poochie figure could have. I can look at this thing standing on my shelf and have my head bombarded with lines from the show. In that, it’s a success. Is it a $55 success? That’s where Super7 is always going to find the sledding tough. We’re talking about a 5.5″ action figure with limited articulation and just an average amount of paint hits. It’s a tough sell no matter how you look at it. I do like the feel of Poochie a bit better than Homer who had a very light feel to him despite being rather chunky. This figure is solid with good heft and the matte applications and color combination of the design help it pop like a figure based on an animated show should. I’m a pretty big fan of the show and the episode Poochie hails from, so for me, I’m content with the purchase. Casual fans may need to approach with more caution.
Slowly but surely I am clearing out all of the action figure preorders I placed in the year 2021. Of the ones that had been remaining, the line I was most looking forward to experiencing was the line of Super7 Ultimates! based on The Simpsons. It was August of 2021 when these suckers went up…
Wednesday, August 18th, ended up being quite an eventful little day in the world of toy collecting. There were some reveals from major toy companies, leaks, and even those long neglected Street Sharks fans got something to get excited about late in the day. Personally, it was a good day for me too as I…
Last year, Lego released its first set and series of mini figures styled after The Simpsons, the animated institution that has anchored Fox’s Sunday Night lineup longer than Justin Bieber’s been alive. Debate the merits of the program’s more recent seasons all you want, but it couldn’t diminish my curiosity for a set of Legos…
The Nostalgia Spot 