Yesterday, we took a look at a Cartoon Network original aimed at a pretty broad audience. Today, it’s an Adult Swim original very much aimed at an adult audience. Or at least one older than eight. Smiling Friends is the creation of Michael Cusack and Zach Hadel and it’s an animated sitcom about a couple of guys who work for a non-profit dedicated to making people happy. People call in with a problem, and the Smiling Friends spring into action in order to make them feel better. Only this isn’t a show where the characters just dress up as clowns and do a quick a bit to make someone laugh. It’s more that they’re tasked with helping someone out of a depressive episode and the end results often aren’t achieved in the cleanest of manners.
The show premiered originally during an April Fool’s event in 2020 on Adult Swim. The show was well-received, but at the time was basically just a pilot. Adult Swim ended up ordering an entire season which would consist of 8 episodes and apparently had a season budget of 2 million dollars, which is roughly equivalent to the per-episode budget of Family Guy. Adult Swim is somewhat notoriously slow to act when it comes to greenlighting a show or a renewal, which I assume is part of the reason why it wouldn’t premiere properly for nearly two years. This despite the show being digitally animated with a voice cast largely comprised of just Cusack and Hadel. Each episode is roughly 11 minutes and in an odd twist the network chose to burn them all off in a single night, January 10, 2022, which actually means that today’s subject missed the Christmas season by about two weeks. It’s a bit odd, but Adult Swim rarely seems to care about such things.
The creators of Smiling Friends actually made a name for themselves via Newgrounds, a website I hadn’t thought about in probably a decade.
The main characters of Smiling Friends are Pim (Cusack) and Charlie (Hadel) who are friends and co-workers. Pim is the optimist of the two and would seem especially cut out for the type of job he has. Charlie is essentially the opposite of Pim who really doesn’t want to do anything except show up, do his job, and go home with a steady paycheck to follow. Their boss is simply named Mr. Boss (Marc M.), an old man with a giant head who seems to always be sporting some kind of pants-less bondage apparel. He is a typical terrible boss with unreasonable demands who doesn’t seem to value the lives of his employees, but he makes up for it with a cheerful demeanor. They have some additional co-workers in Glep (Hadel) and Allan (Cusack). Pim, Charlie, Glep, and Allan look more like aliens of some kind. Pim is a little purple guy with a single hair on his head while Charlie is large, yellow, and his head is about 90% nose. Glep is a little green guy with rounded, pincer-like, mandibles and Allan is lanky and red and often wears a tie. I’ve only ever caught a handful of episodes of this show and found it to be pretty typical of Adult Swim in that it’s absurd, but funny. There’s a dryness to the humor in this one and the leads are rather well-defined characters that play off of each other well. A lot of the character designs are crude, but not really ugly. Super Jail is an Adult Swim show I’d call ugly, this is not. There are also different animation techniques at play and guest stars to be found and at 11 minutes it basically doesn’t waste your time.
Charlie isn’t really in the Christmas mood, but considering he’s at work on Christmas Eve, I’d say he’s justified.
The final episode of the first season, which is somewhat irrelevant since they all aired on the same day, is the Christmas one “Charlie Dies and Doesn’t Come Back.” It’s not a very festive title, but it doesn’t need to be. The episode begins at the Smiling Friends headquarters where Pim is decorating for the coming holiday. Nobody else seems all that interested with Glep passed out and Charlie playing some kind of computer game. Pim prods Charlie for some help, but he has no interest on account of their shift is about to end and it’s Christmas Eve so he hardly sees a point in decorating now. Mr. Boss then enters with an unreasonable demand of his staff: find a Christmas tree for the office so it can be put up. Charlie is understandably pissed, while Pim is excited for a Christmas adventure! There’s being an optimist, Pim, and there’s you.
Pim is aggressively cheerful. He’s exhausting.
Pim, Charlie, Allan, and Glep take a ride out to the woods to apparently chop a tree down. Pim is very enthused about it while Charlie expresses a desire to get this over with. Pim is hurt by Charlie’s lack of enthusiasm and seems to not understand why Charlie is so grumpy. Charlie explains it rather plainly that it’s Christmas Eve and he wants to go home. He tries bringing Allan and Glep into the conversation, but they’re not really interested. Pim expresses his frustration that it’s not just now, but every time they want to do something for work Charlie acts like this. I get the sense that this is something that’s been building all season and is now coming to a head. Pim even makes reference to the first episode by bringing up Desmond.
Well that didn’t go well.
Allan interrupts the pair to point out a tree that seems fine. Everyone is in agreement that it’s suitable and Charlie takes it upon himself to cut it down to prove to Pim that he can be helpful. As he strikes at the tree with the axe, he taunts Pim who seems wary. I’m guessing he’s uncomfortable which Charlie swinging an axe in anger and not really paying attention to the task at hand. As Charlie calls out, “Is this putting anyone in a bad mood?!” the tree suddenly falls crushing Charlie in the process scattering blood and guts all over the snow. Pim looks horrified, while Allan and Glep look more stunned than anything. We then get a fast assortment of stock, live-action, images. There’s images of space, plants, binary code, a random guy screaming, and it’s all designed to be somewhat random and unsettling because it’s signaling Charlie’s journey to a very special place: Hell.
What’s the first thing you see when you wake up in Hell? I don’t know, but this is as good a guess as any.
Or as the creepy screaming face calls it, “H E double hockey sticks!” That’s the face that wakes Charlie up from…death? It’s gruesome, but once the camera isn’t zoomed in on it he looks a bit more cute. He’s some chubby, pink, demon, with a pitchfork and he informs Charlie that he’s the one in charge. He then points out Charlie’s hell mattress and hell toilet that he’ll be utilizing and both are supremely awful and terrible. There’s also Steve, some black, squiggly, guy who just screams and wiggles at Charlie prompting him to threaten Steve with violence if he ever does that again. The demon thing tells him that won’t be happening and that he needs to get used to it because we’re in Hell, baby!
Hell just isn’t what it used to be.
After the little guy is finished threatening Charlie, the background falls down revealing that all of the fire and horror was just a poster taped to the wall. They’re in a cell and it’s pretty plain looking. The demon comes clean when Charlie asks where all the fire is and explains that Satan hasn’t been himself lately. He’s pretty down in the dumps about something which has caused Hell to literally freeze over. Charlie then offers up his services as a Smiling Friend claiming he can help get Satan out of whatever funk he’s in. The demon at first denies Charlie’s request for an audience with Satan and threatens him with his pitchfork, but Charlie points out that it’s made of cardboard and the demon just hangs his head in shame. Defeated, he tells Charlie to just get out of there as he’s making him too depressed. Charlie does just that as the gate was apparently left unlocked leaving Steve to console the weeping demon.
On a list of places you don’t expect to run into your grandma, Hell is probably at the top.
Charlie then exits to find Hell is indeed frozen over. He walks through the snow while demons look frozen and upset about the climate until someone calls out to him. It’s his grandma, and Charlie is pretty surprised to find her condemned to Hell. She seems chipper about it though, and explains that she said “damn” one time in reference to her husband’s murder and that’s the strike that put her in Hell. Charlie comments that it seems pretty harsh, but Grandma doesn’t seem to mind. Charlie then asks her if she knows where he can find Satan and she points out a rather ominous looking pit. Charlie thanks her, and as he leaves she offers him a piece of hard candy which happens to be a dirty looking, oversized, lollipop. Charlie politely declines and Grandma is happy to keep it for herself as she shoves the whole thing in her mouth and makes unpleasant sucking sounds.
If it weren’t for all of the creatures trying to eat you, frozen Hell would be a pretty neat place to visit.
Charlie heads down the pit and it’s set to a musical number. It’s a bit of a jazzy sounding song with lyrics such as “It’s Christmas time in H-E-Double-L,” and during the song we see Charlie encounter a bunch of horrible things like predatory demons, fire-breathing monsters, and hordes of little, red, creatures he has to walk over. His journey ends at a frozen lake with what Charlie assumes marks the end of the worst of it. Then Steve pops up in his face screaming again and Charlie socks him right in what I assume is his stomach. As he doubles over in pain, Charlie taunts him by saying he promised he would do that to him if he ever did that again showing no remorse for Steve’s pain. Charlie then walks across the ice while the frozen heads of the damned trapped in the ice taunt him, except the last one who apologizes for not being able to think of something. Charlie takes it in stride telling him “No pressure.”
Hey Satan, how’s it going?
Charlie arrives at two large doors and works up the courage to knock. Once he does, a booming voice from behind the door asks him why he’s come here. Charlie replies “To make you smile,” and the doors open. Inside, Charlie meets Satan, who is a massive, hideous, demon, seated at a computer playing a game. He’s pretty chill for the lord of darkness, and Charlie asks him what’s wrong. Satan explains in a rather casual manner that he’s simply lost his enthusiasm for the job. The worst part is, he doesn’t get paid until the job is done, and considering it’s for eternity, he’s essentially never been paid. He explains that he just doesn’t care at this point and turns to his game. Charlie proposes that if he can help get him out of this depression that Satan let him return to the world of the living and he agrees. They’re then interrupted by a delivery man and there’s a somewhat awkward exchange of food and the driver requesting to take a picture of the food as proof of delivery and such before finally leaving. Satan then inspects the contents of the bag which includes a massive burger, fries, and a drink. He’s irritated that they, once again, forgot the straw.
Note to self: don’t piss off Satan.
As Satan chows down, Charlie points out that maybe he’s lost some of his enthusiasm because he’s stuck in a loop and relying on these quick dopamine hits via junk food and other vices. Satan is immediately put off by this accusation and turns to a vape pen to calm his nerves. Charlie points out that this is just more of said behavior and that’s the last straw (heh). Satan orders him to be tortured and some of his minions come out and strap him down to a rack table. While they crank on it, the little, red, demon guys from earlier start stabbing Charlie and then Steve shows up to get some revenge by punching him in the face. Now Satan is fired up as he tells Charlie it gives him great joy to inflict torture on a pathetic creature like him. This is it! Satan is out of his loop and Charlie points this out to him. Satan thinks about it for a second, and then agrees with Charlie’s take, but since he did piss him off he’s not going to be letting him go anytime soon. Charlie points out that isn’t fair, but Satan doesn’t care because he’s, well, Satan!
Behold! The nipple of God!
From off camera, we hear an unmistakable voice shout “A deal’s a deal.” It’s the late, great, Gilbert Gottfried, but he’s not playing himself, he’s playing God! God himself lands in the room superhero style, his face obscured by a bright light. He’s massive, about the same size as Satan, and sporting some sandals and a toga. He orders Charlie to jump onto his hand, and once he does the two fly out of Hell. Along the way, God tells Charlie that he passed his test. By confronting the evil Satan and restoring his smile he’s confronted the unhappiness in himself. God finishes up the explanation by saying he hopes he learned something from this “cool” experience and wishes him a “Merry Christmas” as he whips Charlie like a fastball at the Earth from way up in outer space.
Just what exactly is Charlie made of?
Charlie goes streaking towards Earth looking like the force of the throw will peel the skin from his skull, or whatever is under there. On Earth, Charlie’s friends are gathered for his funeral. They’re at the cemetery plot where a priest (Hans Van Harken) is delivering the eulogy for Charlie. Mr. Boss has chosen to say a few words via a free verse rap of some kind. The priest thanks Mr. Boss when he’s done, and then gives the signal that the casket is to be lowered. As it does, Charlie seemingly returns by smashing into it and exploding into yellow goo which covers all of the people in attendance and leaves the casket smashed. The goo shivers for a second before it all comes together and Charlie is reborn!
Friends don’t let something like an exposed penis get in the way of a good hug.
Pim and the others can hardly believe what just happened as a naked Charlie stands before them. Mr. Boss gets to declare it a Christmas miracle as Pim excitedly asks what happened? Charlie says a lot took place, and that he doesn’t want to get into it. He at least adds that he met Satan and apologizes for how he was acting. Pim apologizes too for their argument earlier and gives Charlie a big hug, who is very much uncomfortable with Pim hugging him in his present state. We then see a book close and find out an elder Glep had been telling this story the whole time to his grandson. The little Glep excitedly asks if all of that stuff really happend. Very casually, the grandpa confirms it and says it’s all real, including Christian Hell before adding “Sorry” as his grandson looks upset. He then cheerfully waves at the camera and says “Merry Christmas, everyone!”
The whole time it was just a grandfather telling a story to his grandson. Wholesome.
That was a very different sort of Christmas special, but one that I consider pretty entertaining in its own way. I’m assuming it was a lot of fun to see Pim and Charlie’s two very contrasting personalities come to a head as they did in the first act, and then it’s always fun to take a tour of Hell. Getting Satan out of a state of depression feels like an escalation of the problems the group encountered all season. It’s almost surprising to see them go to such an extreme in just the eighth episode. What could be a greater task than that? And on Christmas, no less!
As is often the case with these more offbeat Adult Swim shows, the Christmas element isn’t a huge player. It’s there to help get this one off the ground, and then it mostly fades into the background. Satan and God wishing others a “Merry Christmas” both serve as jokes because they jolt the viewer’s brain back into Christmas mode. These episodes are rather perfectly placed on a broadcast schedule often airing around midnight after one has indulged in a full course of more traditional holiday fair. This is the kind of thing you turn to when that’s getting just a bit too much.
This isn’t the type of show that induces hysterical laughter, but Hell’s toilet did get a chuckle out of me.
Smiling Friends is a show that’s simply animated, but this episode has a lot of flourish to it on account of the setting. The various areas Charlie finds himself traversing through in Hell are pretty interesting. The shot of Charlie walking over the frozen river while a massive beast swims beneath him is not the sort of thing this show needed to do, but I was happy for it. The approach to Satan was certainly interesting as he was done with a more traditional CG approach. He looks plenty demonic, and I’m not sure what the thought process was that resulted in the approach, but it was fine. It felt rather appropriate that a being such as Satan was depicted in an almost different medium from a mortal like Charlie or Satan’s various underlings. I’m just surprised that God didn’t get a similar treatment. The inclusion of Charlie’s grandmother was a bit of dark humor, and I liked the small arc with Steve. I’m surprised we didn’t hear from the little imp character again, but we didn’t really need to.
I don’t know if Charlie actually learned anything in the end, or if we’re supposed to expect a change in his behavior going forward. A second season is on the way, so I guess we’ll have to wait until then. Since this show isn’t even a year old, Cartoon Network is likely to show this episode during the Adult Swim block at least a few times this month making this one of the easier specials to view. If you still have cable, that is. If not, it’s on the Max streaming platform and available for purchase as well. Smiling Friends is a show that I should watch more of, and while this episode isn’t a classic, at least the show seems pretty good.
Can’t wait until tomorrow for more Christmas? Check out what we had to say on this day last year and beyond:
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I have a pretty tremendous blind spot for most animated shows produced between 2005-2015. If it was a show animated and marketed at adults, then I might have checked it out. If it was a show created primarily for kids and not based on some existing IP I knew from my childhood then I almost certainly did not interact with it. And when it comes to the Cartoon Network shows of that era, I basically only saw snippets of the programming when I turned my TV on if I had been watching Adult Swim the night before. That’s why I completely missed out on Regular Show. I say missed out because I’ve heard it’s quite good, but I don’t know that for sure. I know the name and I know it as the cartoon starring the bird and the raccoon, but that’s basically where my knowledge ends. I couldn’t tell you when it debuted, when it ended, or if it was associated with any of the other programs airing around the same time on Cartoon Network. For some reason I thought it was tied into Adventure Time, another show I am not familiar with at all, but aside from the creators knowing each other it would appear I was mistaken.
Now that I’ve done a little bit of reading, I can tell you that Regular Show was conceived by J.G. Quintel, a former Cal Arts student and a lot of the show is based on his experiences there. The show was part of Cartoon Network’s search for more original content via its Cartoonstitute initiative which allowed creators to submit a pitch without network interference. It’s a pretty neat idea and sounds similar to how the network first got into creating its own animation via the Cartoon, Cartoon model in the 90s which was similar to what Nickelodeon had done in creating its Nicktoons. And just looking at some of the shows the network greenlit during this time, it would appear it was a pretty big success. It’s somewhat baffling that the network seems to have moved away from this approach in favor of relying on existing IP, but that seems to be an industry wide thing and not something unique to Cartoon Network.
Regular Show aired on Cartoon Network from 2010 – 2017.
Regular Show may be a show I’m not familiar with, but it looks like I should probably reconsider that since it produced multiple Christmas episodes during its run. Given that, I’m a little surprised to see that the first of those episodes, and the subject of today’s post, didn’t come along until Season 4. Regular Show is one of those cartoons that gets a half hour block to air two roughly 11 minute shorts. For Christmas, 11 minutes just wasn’t going to cut it so both segments were devoted to one story as have many cartoons of similar formats before it. Christmas just isn’t suited for such a meager duration, as much as that pains my fingers each holiday season. I decided not to watch any Regular Show before watching this episode so I’m going in cold turkey. I know the two lead characters, Mordecai (Quintel) the blue jay and Rigby (William Salyers) the raccoon, are slacker types in their early 20s. They’re probably like a lot of men that age who would rather play video games and goof off than work or study. They would probably also like to drink beer, but this wasn’t an Adult Swim show so I’m guessing that’s out. I don’t really know what’s going on with the world they inhabit. There appears to be animal types as well as normally inanimate objects that are sentient. There’s also people. Is there an explanation for this in the show? I have no idea. Does there need to be one? Not really.
It’s rather amusing how the size of the sleigh changes to suit the shot throughout the fight. Some of the interior shots make it look more like a barge.
The episode begins with a cold open. A shadowy figure is in the midst of a heist in a cold climate and would appear to be using the sleigh belonging to one Santa Claus as a way of escaping. The sleigh is not only outfitted with eight reindeer, but even a ninth at the head of the team signifying Rudolph – that’s commitment! The show is hand-drawn with digital animation and it looks pretty fluid, but a little simplistic when it comes to lighting. It’s very similar to Rick and Morty in that respect. As the sleigh takes off, we see a sign indicating that this is the North Pole so the factory this guy is running from (and blew up) might just be Santa’s workshop. The shadowy figure is coveting what looks like a present and he also has the pointed features of an elf, but before he can open the gift he’s attacked by some sort of sky-sledding ninja! And not just any ninja – Santa! He removes a scarf to reveal his beard and this Santa isn’t your usual portly guy with red cheeks. He’s large, and intimidating, though he still retains the beard. He’s also voiced by the incomparable Ed Asner, probably the greatest Santa voice there ever was. He tells the elf, Quillgin (Thomas Haden Church) that he can’t let him leave with that gift, but he’s not going to just give it up. The two fight over it, and Quillgin is able to get it away from Santa momentarily. As he opens the lid, a light pours out. Santa cries out “No!” and then adds “Rudolph! Diene nase!” This command, which Google tells me means “Serve nose” in German, prompts the reindeer to cock his head and blast a laser from his nose at the elf. This dislodges the present, which Santa grabs and dives out of the sleigh with. Quillgen reaches over the side of the sleigh brandishing a gun, a realistic looking one at that, and shoots Santa three times in the stomach as the old man falls out of sight. Quillgin taunts him as he disappears through the clouds with a menacing, “Merry Christmas, Santa Claus.”
Benson’s sweater is going to be a source of consternation for him throughout.
That takes us into the title, which is some rather ominous music over dark, red-tinted, clouds. When the credits are through, we’re taken to a festive holiday gathering. Brenda Lee’s “Rocking Around the Christmas Tree” is playing and the warmly lit house is nicely decoarated. Here is where I have to do my research as I don’t know who anyone is. In the kitchen, a green guy in a Hannukah sweater is singing the praises of Christmas cookies to a yeti. This is apparently Muscle Man (Sam Marin) and the yeti is Skips (Mark Hamill), who doesn’t say anything. In the main room, a living gumball machine in a reindeer sweater is chatting it up with a human female. This is Benson (Marin) and the girl would appear to be named Audrey (Courtenay Taylor) via process of elimination when I look at the cast list. She compliments the sweater Benson is wearing who takes the compliment with grace, then she adds it’s sure to win the “Ugliest sweater” competition, if there is one. Benson gives a nervous laugh indicating he just thinks it’s a nice sweater, then excuses himself to get more soda. It’s technically a kid’s show, after all, no beer.
These are our main characters, a blue jay named Mordecai and a raccoon named Rigby.
In the kitchen, Benson runs into a Mr. Maellard (David Ogden Stiers) who looks like an old man, but his head is the moon. I have no idea who he is, but he’s leaving since he has six other parties to attend. He compliments Benson on his party though (this must be his home then) and gets in a dig about the sweater on his way out. Benson seems irritated at yet another jab at his sweater and gets further irritated when he finds nothing but empty soda bottles on the refreshments table. He then calls out to a Thomas (Roger Craig Smith) as he heads back into the living room and we see who Thomas is. It’s some goat guy and he managed to get his head stuck in the railing of the stairs. Mordecai and Rigby make their entrance here as they’re doing some sort of Christmas rap, or song, for someone on the phone. When the brief little diddy is concluded, Mordecai picks up the phone to ask a Margaret if she liked it. She must be a friend, or a girlfriend, who couldn’t attend the party. She seems to have a lukewarm reception to it since Mordecai says you need to be able to see the dance that goes with it, but he doesn’t seem bothered in the least. Benson then enters, and finding Thomas unable to procure soda, asks Mordecai and Rigby to go over to Skips’ garage to get some more. They agree to do so, but on the condition that this be considered their Christmas gift to Benson. He basically restates the offering in an irritated tone, then adds a fine, and the two slackers high five in celebration for seemingly getting out of spending money on a friend (he’s apparently their boss too, and yeah, don’t buy your boss Christmas gifts, folks).
Santa’s not looking so hot.
Mordecai and Rigby, with festive scarves around their necks, head through the snowy night to retrieve soda for the party. As they walk they both share their enthusiasm for Christmas and the getting gifts part, which is hardly a surprise. Rigby even adds the holiday should occur once a month, at a minimum, which his fine, feathered, friend agrees with. Their conversation is interrupted by what looks like a meteor streaking towards the home of Skips. It smashes through the roof of the garage (oh no, the soda!) and Mordecai beckons his friend to hurry. As they open the garage door, their scarves have mysteriously vanished. Damn, I liked how they looked. Inside the garage, they find an unconscious man on what was once an automobile. Mordecai asks the guy if he’s okay, and he speaks indicating he’s not actually out cold. He tells them not to worry about him, but to take the box. He then rolls over and groans when he realizes who is standing before him. Naturally, Mordecai and Rigby have questions, and when he says he’s Santa they’re not ready to believe him. Mordecai lists out the qualities they would anticipate Santa to have like smelling good and having rosy cheeks noting this guy has bruised cheeks and smells like he stepped in something. Santa, seeming more than a little irritated, informs them that stuff is just marketing and he’s the real deal and proves it by telling them what they keep writing him letters for every year: an invisibility cloak. Apparently, he’s not allowed to give out magical gifts as it’s against the rules, which Rigby is pretty surprised to hear that even Santa has to follow rules.
I wonder how you get to be part of a Santa focus group?
Santa then gets back to the box and tells the two they need to destroy it. When they ask what’s in it, he tells them it’s not what’s inside, but the box itself that’s the issue. We then are treated to a flashback. Santa explains that his head toy designer, Quillgin, had spent his life working on this thing. It’s a box that gives the opener whatever they desire most. Santa didn’t know at the time, but it was crafted using dark magic. They tested it on a focus group, a family of four and one box, to see how kids would react to it on Christmas morning. It made them violent as they coveted the box and wouldn’t let anyone else have it. The kid in the scenario even bites his mother on the forearm when she tries to open it. Santa orders the box be sealed away and all of the notes pertaining to its construction destroyed, but Quillgin challenged him on it. Santa is shown easily overpowering him, but acknowledges that he should have expected the elf to seek revenge at some point.
The box turns everyone into assholes.
That’s when the flashback ends. Santa, in the present, tells the boys they must destroy the box because Quillgin is still out there after it. And when he gets it, he’ll use it to get what he wants most: the destruction of Christmas! Mordecai and Rigby obviously don’t want that to happen and they vow to help Santa destroy the box. He doesn’t seem enthusiastic about enlisting their aid and wishes he had landed in someone else’s garage. Well, he’s stuck with them! The two try to help Santa up, but he’s in far too much pain to try and stand and tells them to take the box and go. They do as their told, though not before momentarily misplacing the box first, and once gone they get their friends and return to the garage to show them what happened, but Santa is gone! Everyone is pissed at the pair, and by everyone I mean Benson, Pops (a guy with a lollipop or something for a head voiced by Sam Marin), Muscle Man, Skips, and Hi Five Ghost (a little ghost with a hand coming out of its head that has a basic shape not unlike the ghosts from Pac-Man that doesn’t seem to do or say much, but the noises that come out of him are provided by Quintel). Not believing a word they’re saying, Benson takes the box and looks into it. We don’t know what he desired, but his pupils dilate and the box is snatched by Muscle Man. The same happens with him, and soon Pops and Hi Five Ghost have a gander and they all start fighting over it until Skips yanks it from them and leaves the lid on.
I’m guessing this place holds more significance for regular viewers of this show.
Now that the powers of the box have been demonstrated, the group asks what they’re supposed to do with it. Mordecai tells them that Santa entrusted the box to them so they could destroy it. Muscle Man decides to take care of it with a sledge hammer, but his strike bounces off and sends him sailing into the wall of the garage. Skips gives the box a sniff and confirm the presence of dark magic. The only way to destroy such an item, according to the yeti, is to cast it into molten lava. Rigby asks how they can possibly do that and Skips tells him he knows a place: East Pines. This is either the park all of these guys work at, or a rival one, as Rigby is kind of pissed that Skips lead them here. He mentions a Gene and some rival park rangers, but Skips informs him there’s an abandoned mine shaft on the other side of the park that will lead them to where they need to go.
These rangers are very committed to making sure their snowmen remain dickless.
The crew heads in and as they run through the park they pass a fairly conventional looking snowman. Rigby decides to get a little mischievous and indicates he’s going to “fix” the snowman. He reaches for the carrot nose, suggesting it’s likely to become another part of the snowman’s anatomy, but the second it’s disturbed an alarm goes off and a whole bunch of park rangers spring up from the bushes. They’re armed with some kind of guns and they order the group to step away from the carrot and they’re forced to comply. We then cut quickly back to the garage to see Quillgin finding the wrecked car where Santa once lay. He’s got a small army with him and he tells them the box couldn’t have gotten far from here. They mount snowmobiles and head off towards the park.
This is Gene, who happens to be a vending machine. We’ll get to see that he has a wife and son, also vending machines. How they procreate is a mystery.
At a ranger station, the crew is tied up and getting chewed out by a vending machine named Gene (Kurtwood Smith). He laments that he thought the “Prank Wars” were over and accuses the group of sneaking into their park to play some lame, Yuletide, prank this evening. Benson tells him that’s not what they’re after (and gets his shirt insulted in the process by Gene) and Mordecai tells him about the box. Predictably, Gene doesn’t believe him and orders one of his men, Larry (Salyers), to open it to see if it’s a prank. He doesn’t really want to, but he does as the vending machine commands. He reacts favorably to whatever he’s seeing, so Gene snatches it and does the same. Then another guy tries to get it and the three start fighting until the box squirts away and they get chewed out by Mordecai and the others. They bring Gene up to speed and let him know that Christmas is at stake. Right as they do, Quillgin and his team storm the place and all of the people in the station can see what’s happening via the monitors. Gene basically freezes as Mordecai and Rigby plead with him for his help. He just keeps looking at a picture of his family taken on Christmas morning (his wife and son are vending machines as well, it’s probably pretty easy for a vending machine to give birth) and then back to the monitor as Quillgin takes out the rangers. Rigby is pretty shocked to see that Quillgin isn’t some tiny, little, elf and soon the door to the room starts shaking. Someone is pounding on it, and they want in!
Ever see a vending machine drive a snowmobile? Yes, once.
The door bursts open and it’s just another ranger with his arms full of eggnog. He reprimands them for not helping him, then matter-of-factly mentions the attackers just outside. Gene finally comes to his senses and throws out a “Let’s ride” to transition us to the next scene where everyone is riding snowmobiles. Gene leads them to an abandoned mine, but then tells them he will go no further. He plans to try and stall the elves, but as he drives away he calls out to them to watch out for the booby traps. When Benson responds with “What booby traps?” Gene just shouts back, “Merry Christmas!” The crew then heads inside on their sleds until they reach a dead end. Before they can assess the situation, the floor opens up and sends them all down a long, icy, slide. It’s a slide that ends at a chasm, but the sleds have enough speed to clear it and crash on the other side where an impaled skeleton in a foreboding hall awaits them.
You can’t dance in a sweater, so Muscle Man discarded it.
Despite the ominous looking skeleton, Benson seems to think they can just walk around it to the door behind it, but the skeleton was clearly the victim of a booby trap. Or should I say, the human that the skeleton used to be was a victim of a booby trap? When Benson approaches it he steps on a tile causing spikes to shoot out, but he falls backwards to avoid it. It’s Skips who notices some glyphs on the wall which seem to suggest the right way to tiptoe through the would-be lethal trap. Mordecai decides to try and use the skeleton as a way to follow the directions as Rigby reads them. It’s basically like a 9-digit number pad on the floor, and activating each panel in the proper sequence should theoretically disable the trap. Only it’s not working and Mordecai casts the corpse aside in frustration. Then Muscle Man decides he’s got this and removes his shirt (despite his name, he’s not very muscley) for some reason and jumps into the trap. He basically breakdances in the pattern which he apparently memorized and a video game like chime lets him know he did it right. Everyone then heads through while Muscle Man boasts how that thing didn’t even touch him, then the trap springs all of the spikes at once and he changes his candor to “Whoa! I almost just died!”
This episode has me wondering if I too am good enough at pinball to allow my friends to traverse a dangerous chasm or if I’d end up getting them killed.
Skips encourages everyone to continue on which involves going down a slide. Meanwhile, Quillgin has taken over the ranger outpost and is analyzing the security footage of the crew heading into the mine and spots the present in Mordecai’s lap. Gene, who is bound up and placed on his side, taunts them that the box is probably already destroyed at this point so one of the elves just kicks him over so that he’s face down and they can’t hear him. At the bottom of the slide, the gang comes upon the next test: a snow-covered pinball machine. The clue indicates that they have to rack up points to make a bridge appear, but should they lose a ball “Watch out below.” The machine is positioned at the edge of a cliff and their destination is on the other side. Mordecai and Rigby bemoan this test as they consider pinball dated and out of fashion. Benson just tells them to step aside and starts playing the machine. As he racks up points, an ice bridge appears, but when he loses a ball the ground beneath Muscle Man breaks away, but Skips is able to grab him. Rigby criticizes Benson’s playing which earns him a punch in the head from Mordecai who is offering nothing but encouragement to the gumball man. Now three balls are deployed and Benson is going off. Quillgin and his team of operatives then show up and Benson tells everyone to make a break for it. Once they’re safely on the other side, he lets all three balls slip past the paddles and makes a break for it himself. As he runs across the ice bridge, it breaks apart behind him. Quillgin’s operatives are chasing him, but soon are overtaken by the crumbling ice and presumably fall to their death. Benson is able to make it across and Quillgin is left to wail “Noooooo!”
Pops is apparently a very accomplished grappler.
The good guys find themseleves in yet another room, this one with a circle of glyphs on the floor. Skips takes a gander at the glyphs and translates them for everyone. It’s the final trial, and apparently they have to wrestle a bear. Once Skips makes that announcement, a roar from offscreen can be heard and a massive polar bear comes sauntering in. Now it’s Pops’ turn to make himself useful as he volunteers to wrestle the bear and seems pretty confident in his ability. He gets into the ring and the bear starts tossing him around. Rigby, ever the optimist, declares that Pops is dead while Mordecai tells him to shut up. The bear gets Pops in a hold who then calmly informs the bear that this is a fight he cannot win. He then overpowers the bear by standing up and hip-tossing him onto his back. He grabs the bear in a hold similar to a Dragon Sleeper and proceeds to choke the bear out. The others celebrate his victory, then the bear stands up and surprises everyone when it speaks. The bear (Fred Tatasciore) congratulates them on passing the final trial and informs them that they may now proceed. He then opens a portal of some kind on his chest and the crew is just expected to walk into it. As Mordecai approaches, he’s dismayed to see yet another slide, but Skips just slaps him on the back forcing him onto it.
They managed to get through all of that, but still wind up at gunpoint before the task is done.
The guys head down the slide and it ends in a warmly lit room. The pit to the core of the Earth is here, but as the group approaches it with the box, Quillgin appears! They’re all pretty confused that he could beat them to this room, and he points out he took the stairs. Apparently, that was an option this whole time. Unfortunately for them, Quillgin has a gun and demands that Mordecai hand over the box. Benson encourages him to do so, pointing out the whole gun and all, and adds they did their best, but now it’s over. Mordecai reluctantly starts to head in Quillgin’s direction, but some weird steam or smoke encircles the elf and seems to take over his arm. He’s unsure of what’s happening, but some unseen force causes him to toss his gun down the fire pit. Then we hear some laughter, and above the pit is Santa! He was concealing himself with an invisible cloak! He’s also riding a pretty sweet hoverboard. The others are in awe at the sight of the legend himself while Rigby is actually ticked off about the invisibility cloak. When he accuses Santa of claiming they couldn’t make such things, he corrects him by saying they can totally make them, they just can’t give them as gifts.
There goes Christmas…
Santa joins the others leaving Quillgin enraged and in disbelief. He thought he had killed Santa, but the big guy reveals he was wearing a bulletproof vest which he also pulls aside to reveal some chiseled abs which Muscle Man seems to really like. Quillgin counters with a grenade and Santa is forced to dive in front of everyone with his hoverboard to shield them from the blast. In the process, the box is dropped and directed towards Quillgin who picks it up and proceeds to explain his nefarious plan. Or thought process, anyway, as he reasons if they just gave everyone in the world one of these boxes they wouldn’t have to fight over them. He accuses Santa of not wanting to do that as then no one would need him anymore if they had what they desired most. Santa denies this, but Quillgin is not going to be swayed. He opens the lid and demands he be given what he wants most: the destruction of Christmas forever!
That’s pretty bad ass, boys.
With the box open, the background turns into a nightscape. Images of holiday stuff appear floating in the air all with sticks of glowing red dynamite strapped to them. “Carol of the Bells” comes in and a remote control detonator appears inside the box. This is apparently how Quillgin will get his destruction of Christmas. As he reaches for it, Mordecai leaps into action! He tackles Quillgin and both fall into the pit! “Carol of the Bells” either morphs into, or was always, the Trans Siberian Orchestra version as Mordecai and Quillgin battle over the box and detonator while they fall to their certain death. Rigby dives in after his friend, though I’m not sure what he thought that would accomplish? Mordecai gets punched by Quillgin and loses his bid at the box, but Rigby is able to grab it. Quillgin gets his mitts on it too, and we see the image inside the box change from a detonator to a cone of ice cream as the two try to create what they desire most. Or in the case of Rigby, basically anything other than the Christmas-destroying detonator. Rigby is able to pull it out of Quillgin’s hands, but he grabs Rigby’s ankles. Mordecai then calls out to his friend to release his hold on the box so that he can fall to it. Rigby does as instructed and Mordecai is able to get control of the box and makes his own desire appear: a two-person hoverboard! He hops onto it, grabs Rigby, and leaves Quillgin to his fate. Which is lava. Lots, and lots, of lava.
Count it.
Mordecai rides out of the chasm with Rigby to applause from his friends. The box is no more, and the same is true of Quillgin. We’re then taken back to Benson’s house. Santa flew everyone there, and as they all head into the house Benson pauses to ask Santa a question. Declaring him the authority on all things Christmas, he asks for Santa’s opinion of his sweater. Santa curtly informs him that he should have tossed it into the lava pit. Benson says nothing in response, but removes the sweater and heads inside. Santa then has a chance to speak with Mordecai and Rigby. He confesses he didn’t think they were up to the task, but they surprised him. The two suggest that this should get them onto the nice list and Santa responds “Stranger things have happened.” He then takes off and the pair watch him fly towards a crescent moon, but not in front of it. Should we count this as a moon shot? It’s iffy. He vanishes with a blast of speed and Mordecai and Rigby seem very tickled by this as they high five declaring it “Just like in the movies!”
With invisibility cloaks, they’ll never have to work again! Though I’m guessing they probably lost them eventually.
Benson heads inside to find Thomas asleep with his head still stuck in the banister. He shouts “Thomas!” which startles the goat man awake and in the process gets him unstuck. He says nothing, though it looks like the other party-goers decorated him with lights and such while he was out. He walks off as Mordecai and Rigby enter. Benson points out that the house is a mess and they need to clean it up. They both groan, but Benson smiles and lets them know he plans to help. He heads off into the kitchen for some cleaning supplies leaving the two alone to discover a gift under the tree. It’s addressed to them and when they open it they find a card inside that simply reads “Sometimes you have to break some rules.” Benson re-enters the room with a mop and bucket, but Mordecai and Rigby are gone. Irritated, he marches back into the kitchen. Mordecai and Rigby then appear on the couch as the gift contained the invisibility cloaks they coveted. Shouting “Best gift ever,” the two head back under their cloaks and we see two game controllers rise up from under the coffee table. The camera then moves outside of the house and pans to the sky to find Santa Claus once again. He’s flying away from the camera shouting his customary, “Ho! Ho! Ho! Merry Christmas!” He turns the sleigh around so it’s facing the camera head-on, then in a flash of light he vanishes leaving behind two trails of flames a-la the DeLorean in Back to the Future as a sound-a-like musical number to that film’s theme comes in to take us out.
This version of Santa knows how to make an exit.
So that was Regular Show. After watching my very first episode, I can see the appeal. While it didn’t really make me laugh out loud, there was humor to be found. Mordecai is pretty likable as a lead character since he’s positive and seems sincere. He’s a nice guy and supportive of his friends, he’s just a slacker. Rigby is a little more plucky, a little less someone to aspire to, but still likable. The rest of the cast seem fine and I’m sure there’s more to them, but you can only learn so much about a show in 22 minutes. I always welcome an Ed Asner appearance, especially as Santa Claus. This show’s version of Santa was more of the bad ass kind and it works. The plot wasn’t anything special, but it gave the heroes a quest and provided a villain that could be disposed of in the end. It probably didn’t need the full runtime to tell the story as the trials did get a little long, but it was fine. It was still fairly breezy to take in.
I am here for bad ass Santa.
The visuals were also fine. It has that modern aesthetic that has been utilized most by Rick and Morty of late and I like how some characters look, but don’t care for others. I hate how Santa’s nose is drawn as it looks like a lump of flesh that got smashed with a shovel, but the design of the rest was fine. I especially liked Benson and how the untextured gumballs serve as a beard. The animation is fluid and the colors saturated, plus bonus points are in order for giving some of the characters holiday attire. I kind of wish Mordecai and Rigby kept the scarves they wore for a hot minute throughout the special, but oh well. I was surprised at the amount of licensed music, especially because this is a show that was released on DVD, so kudos to Cartoon Network for paying for it. Of course, I’m not watching it on DVD or Blu Ray so I don’t know if they were left in, but I’m assuming they were since I didn’t see any mention of it on all of the places I checked out to read up on the show.
Will I watch more Regular Show? Maybe. I don’t know. It was enjoyable, but I’m not feeling any urge to watch more. I also don’t feel the need to add this to the usual rotation of annual Christmas specials. I suppose I am curious about the other Christmas episodes the show did, especially to see if Santa or even the should-be-very-dead Quillgin return. If you would like to experience this one on your own, there are the aforementioned physical releases, plus digital ones available. It’s also streaming on the Max platform, and being a newer Cartoon Network property, there’s some chance the cable channel actually airs this one. It should be relatively easy to come by, just maybe not for “free.”
Can’t wait until tomorrow for more Christmas? Check out what we had to say on this day last year and beyond:
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All right, we’ve been at this for a few years now so you probably don’t need much of a primer on Bob’s Burgers, right? The animated sitcom which is shockingly in its 12th season (shocking because it still feels new to me) has become a reliable spot for Christmas fun each and every year. The…
After yesterday’s horrid feature, I feel that today calls for a Christmas special that’s actually good. And in order to satisfy that desire, I’m heading for Arlen, Texas for our first look at a special from the animated sitcom, King of the Hill. Back when King of the Hill premiered on the Fox Network in…
I don’t think there’s much debate that the most popular and enduring character churned out by the Hanna-Barbera factory during its hey-day is none other than Scooby Doo. About the only franchise that even competes with the big dog is The Flintstones, which hasn’t been relevant for ages. Scoob has basically had an omnipresence ever since he debuted on the small screen back in 1969. The franchise hasn’t always had a new show in production since then, but for a long time one of the shows it spawned could be found airing somewhere on television. I grew up watching Scooby and the gang solve mysteries featuring guest stars that predated my existence by quite a bit. I also had A Pup Named Scooby-Doo for something more modern, and eventually the franchise made the move to the big screen during the early 2000s.
It’s hard to say what has made Scooby-Doo such a lasting entity. I watched the show often enough as a kid, though I don’t recall ever liking it. Scooby-Doo seemingly existed during an era where kids (especially) would just watch whatever was on. No streaming, few houses with a VCR, and few options on VHS for those house that did have a VCR meant we were at the mercy of the broadcast overlords. It’s a thing my own children can’t even comprehend when I try to explain it which is usually brought on by me getting frustrated watching them endlessly cycle through their streaming options to try to decide what to watch. I feel like a lot of shows benefitted from that same phenomenon as I watched a bunch of crap I couldn’t have cared less about. Unlike a lot of that stuff though, Scooby has continued to live on. His shows may have sucked, but I do think the character of Scooby-Doo (and Shaggy) is pretty charismatic and likable. People want to enjoy the show, even if the actual program makes that task an impossible one.
It’s like past iterations of Scooby-Doo, only funny!
Because of my experience with the franchise growing up, it likely comes as no surprise that I have not paid much attention to it. I never watched the movies, and I definitely never sought out the many direct-to-video features the franchise has spawned over the years. I have heard some good things here and there, but they never were enough to get me to bite. It seems the franchise has had numerous stops and starts over the past decade and they almost all follow the same trajectory: premiere on Cartoon Network, air for a bit, move to Boomerang, see the remaining episodes unceremoniously burned off. Cartoon Network and parent company Warner seem like they don’t know what to do with the franchise, or they have unrealistic expectations for every new series they greenlight. They seem to give each one about two seasons, but no more. Right smack in the middle of this thing is the series Be Cool, Scooby-Doo! From an outsider’s perspective, it’s the most intriguing of the post 2000 Scooby-Doo productions because it features an art style most would deem “out there” for a Scooby-Doo cartoon. The characters have a much more “toon” vibe to them with unrealistic proportions and exaggerated features. I see a lot of different influences when I look at the characters ranging from American Dad!, Mission Hill, Powerpuff Girls, and The Ren & Stimpy Show. It also gives the series a throwback feel to the last version I paid attention to, A Pup Named Scooby-Doo, which also had a far more toon aesthetic.
More importantly, this show features a Christmas episode. The stuff from the 70s and the aforementioned Pup did not tackle the subject which is both surprising and not. The approach of a lot of Hanna-Barbera productions was to produce content that television networks could air at basically anytime. Scooby always had a mild horror element at play due to the mystery format, and maybe that contributed in keeping the franchise away from Christmas. Most of the classic Hanna-Barbera series avoided the subject though, with The Flintstones basically being the exception. Come the 80s, they embraced it a bit more as we’ve looked at Christmas episodes from The Smurfs, The Jetsons, and even Don Coyote. It’s a touch surprising that A Pup Named Scooby-Doo didn’t get to do a Christmas mystery, but then again neither did The Flintstone Kids, Fantastic Max, and a host of others.
This kid waited until Christmas Eve to get a primer on how everything works.
The episode begins with a cold open. A soft, instrumental, rendition of “Deck the Halls” can be heard as we pan from the sky to a warmly lit home on Christmas Eve. Two boys are putting out the customary milk and cookies for Santa Claus. If I’m supposed to know who these kids are it’s lost on me for having never watched the show. There are two boys listed in the credits, Aiden (Todd Haberkorn) and Braiden (Debi Derryberry) and I assume these are them. The younger of the two is pretty concerned with this whole Santa thing and is pointing out the gaps in the logic that allow Santa to visit millions of homes in a single night. He’s either some sort of math whiz or he simply memorized the conditions needed for Santa to complete the task. It begins with more innocent questions, like how does he avoid getting burned, before the kid launches into the more complicated questions. When he’s done, the older one just says “He’s fireproof.”
I was hoping to see Santa too, but this is kind of bad ass, no?!
Before the boy can respond, a sound from the roof excites the two and they run to an upstairs window. They open it up and take a look out and spy a shadowy figure on-top of a nearby chimney. They both ask aloud “Santa?” with a sense of awe before the shadow turns and reveals its true identity: a pterodactyl! The two kids scream as the beast jumps into the night and they retreat into the safety of their house as the opening title comes storming in. I don’t know about you, but I’d be pretty impressed with the sight of a pterodactyl on my roof, even if I was looking for Santa. The opening title features a pretty simple rock instrumental for its song. The characters dodge spooky creatures while Fred drives around in the Mystery Machine until eventually he collects the whole gang and Scoob ends it with his catchphrase, “Scooby-dooby-doo!” It’s a far cry from Scooby-Doo, Where Are You!
Hell yeah, it’s Christmas, baby!
When the song ends we find the gang in Rockwellville which boasts a population of zero naughty individuals and all nice. I’m guessing that sign will be proven wrong before this one is over. Fred (Frank Welker, the only original cast member still at it) and Velma (Kate Micucci) are admiring the scenery while Shaggy (Matthew Lillard) and Scoob (Welker) are doing exercises to keep their metabolism up as they’re in the prime eating season. Fred is very taken by how all-out the town goes for Christmas while Velma seems a bit overwhelmed by it. Fred decides to check on Daphne (Grey Griffen) and see how the decorations in the Mystery Machine are coming along, only when he opens the rear doors to the van, the group is greeted with a “Surprise!” and a face full of confetti. It would seem that Christmas also happens to be Daphne’s birthday and she says she’s always wanted to have a birthday all to herself and not have to share it with Christmas. Velma points out that this means she threw herself a surprise birthday party hoping the others will acknowledge how silly that sounds, but no one does. Fred isn’t really onboard with this decision from Daphne as he’s brought the gang to this festive town in search of the perfect Christmas mystery that will lead to them helping orphans or something. As he explains his reasoning, he’s bathed in a warm light from above which is literally coming from a street light that was just switched on by a fellow named George (Christian Lanz). Fred thanks him and gives him a tip hoping the fellow will return for any other epiphanies he may have.
Fred is so determined to make this a special Christmas episode that he’s even hired an epiphany guy.
Velma points out to Fred that he can’t just choose what kind of mystery falls into their lap, but Fred asks aloud what other mystery could possibly occur in a town as festive as this one? Cue some nearby carolers who sing about the town being terrorized by a giant pterodactyl. Velma seems ready to pounce on this one as she mentions they passed by an archeological site on their way into town, but Fred refuses to believe it. He suspects someone saw a giant reindeer and mistook it for a pterodactyl, but Velma just corrects him and states it was a pterodactyl, but in an excited tone. Fred continues to try and pushback, but Velma just gestures and repeatedly tells him it’s a pterodactyl!
He doesn’t look particularly holly or jolly.
And sure enough, the massive beast has landed on a decoration over the street and spreads its wings in a menacing fashion that sends the crowd scattering. The gang heads for the Mystery Machine, but as Fred tries to drive away, the van won’t budge. That’s because the pterodactyl has grabbed ahold of the roof rack with its massive claws and is now lifting the Mystery Machine high into the air! The beast flies above the city and inside the van the crew gets tossed around while Daphne struggles to save the birthday cake she bought/made for herself. Fred tells everyone to hold on and pulls a lever which releases the roof rack. Now free from the beast’s talons, the Mystery Machine races back towards the Earth, but Fred keeps his cool. That’s because this Mystery Machine really earns its name as Fred simply pushes a button in the shape of an airplane that converts the van into an actual plane. They land safely on a nearby road, but once they come to a complete stop Velma jumps right back into this mystery issue pointing out that Fred didn’t get the Christmas mystery he wanted. He simply narrows his eyes and says he knows exactly where they need to go next.
Get used to this shot.
The Big Sad Eyes Orphanage! The gang stands outside while a boy, with big, sad, eyes, presses his face on a window to look at them. Daphne is not happy with this development and what it means for her birthday celebration while Velma questions what they’re doing here when they could be exploring the archeological site that just so happens to be right next door. Fred rolls his eyes at her and points out they can’t help orphans at an archeological site which forces Velma to point out that he’s just trying to ignore the mystery they have in favor of finding a Christmas one. Fred sort of groans, but gives in and tells Velma they can go explore the site. As they approach the tunnel with flashlights in-hand Shaggy gets scared, per usual, and they take a look around. A light returns theirs from inside a dark tunnel and a shadowy figure comes rushing towards them!
You don’t have to get used to this guy though.
It’s just some guy named Dr. Mezmit (Jeff Bennett) who is apparently working at the dig site. He immediately mistakes the gang for some volunteers he’s been waiting on, and when Fred tries to tell him they’re not who he thinks they are, he just ignores them. He starts handing out equipment and Velma chimes in again that they’re not the volunteers and they’re actually investigating the pterodactyl sighting. The very cheerful Dr. Mezmit just remarks “Preposterous!” at the suggestion a real, live, pterodactyl is stalking the town and Fred agrees and tries to walk off in search of a new mystery. Then the doctor keeps on yapping and says someone found a perfectly preserved pterodactyl nest in the caves along with perfectly preserved eggs. They would undoubtedly be worth a fortune, but unfortunately a cave-in occurred trapping the nest inside and the mayor is trying to put a stop to their excavation. When Daphne again tells the doctor they’re not the volunteers he’s waiting on he just says “Splendid!” and that he needs all of the help he can get implying he expects them to help along with the volunteers, whenever they show.
I always do my mining in an elf costume.
The conversation is then interrupted by the arrival of one of Mezmit’s original volunteers, David. David (Haberkorn) is dressed as an elf and that’s because he was apparently trying to recruit volunteers at the Christmas festival where he works, but they all got scared away. He speaks like he’s frightened and the doctor is oblivious to this, just as he is oblivious to a lot of things, it would seem. The two grab pickaxes and start hacking away at some stones outside of the tunnel. Seems it would make more sense to break the rocks inside the tunnel, but I’m no archeologist. With the doctor seemingly distracted, the others drop the equipment that he had shoved into their arms and back away slowly. Velma wonders what they should do next, and Fred tells her he knows exactly where to go.
This is the worst looking cartoon silly string I’ve ever seen.
The Big Sad Eyes Orphanage! Yes, Fred is determined to find a Christmas mystery affiliated with this orphanage and the same kid with the big, sad, eyes is still staring at them from inside. Velma angrily tells Fred this isn’t where they should be and points out that the mayor’s office is their next, logical, destination. Fred doesn’t really want to entertain her and says they can do pterodactyl mysteries any day, but this is their one chance for a Christmas mystery! I like how he just dismisses something amazing like a possible real, live, pterodactyl, existing. He also goes into a generic speech about coming together at Christmas time, but is interrupted when he’s hit in the face with silly string. It continues to spray on him for what feels like a rather long time. This show is digitally animated, as is every show post 2000 or so, but for this one sequence it really looks like shit. The silly string looks like it’s being applied to Fred’s face via Microsoft Paint from 1996 as it has zero detail. The culprit spraying him is Daphne, who is still trying to have a birthday celebration here. Shaggy then reminds Fred that he and Scoob need to train for their Christmas feast, which forces Fred to cut a deal with them. He guarantees Daphne a birthday party and that he’ll help the other two train for their feast if they help him with a Christmas mystery. When Velma points out that he can’t just make that happen, he dismissively tells her that he’ll get her a book or something. Shaggy questions what Fred can do for them which prompts Fred to whip out some remote for the Mystery Machine which makes a bunch of training equipment sprout from its hull. It’s all surprisingly conventional gym equipment, but as Fred explains how the treadmill can power the van itself Shaggy reasons all of this equipment could help he and Scoob to eight helpings of Christmas dinner! Scoob doesn’t seem convinced as he finally says something, then smiles and declares they’ll get 9 helpings! With everyone seemingly onboard, Fred declares they’re off to the mayor’s office!
It’s the only way to travel.
I’m mildly confused that Fred wants to go to the mayor’s office since I thought he wanted to ignore the pterodactyl, but whatever. Shag and Scoob, via the treadmill affixed to the Mystery Machine, power the vehicle by running as the gang heads over. Inside the van, Daphne pelts Fred and Velma with balloon animals as she continues to try to force this birthday celebration while Velma ponders if these are the strangest circumstances she’s ever found herself in. Shaggy asks Scooby the same, if this is the strangest situation Velma has ever been in, but their seemingly simple ride over to the mayor’s office is interrupted by the reemergence of the giant pterodactyl! Shag and Scoob see it first and start running faster which makes the Mystery Machine go much faster. Fred tells them to slow down forcing Daphne to point out why they’re running in the first place. The van goes impossibly fast and the beast grabs an old-timey carriage to seemingly throw at them. It misses, but the now out of control Mystery Machine is heading right for a tour bus! We cut to a quick scene inside where the tour guide (Bennett) is pointing out a giant, novelty, candy cane to the patrons on the vehicle’s left and when he tells them to look to the right he’s immediately horrified to see the Mystery Machine baring down on them! He then yells at the people to return to looking left, as if that will save them, but Fred is able to cut hard to the left and avoid striking the bus. The pterodactyl is not so lucky as it clips the roof and crashes into the street. It then rises up and the gang find themselves looking directly at it. The dinosaur flies right at them, but rather than collide with the van it simply flies over it and off towards the full moon.
If it’s not Christmas, Fred’s not buying.
We next find the gang at the mayor’s office and Velma is questioning Mayor Riker (Christian Lanz) why he shut down the dig. He points out the obvious, that it caused a pterodactyl to start terrorizing the town, as justification for it being unsafe. He also adds that some of the money for the dig was then redirected to the orphanage since it was on their land. This gets Fred excited as he’s still in search of a mystery that will benefit the orphans and have a Christmas component. The mayor points out that he didn’t mention anything about helping orphans, per say, but does point out the town tree which they put a gift for everyone in town on. Fred just gets more excited and asks about rogue elves or Christmas ghosts and the mayor just points out they have a pterodactyl problem. Fred frowns as he’s clearly sick of hearing about this dinosaur problem and walks off much to the mayor’s confusion.
What are those leaves on Shag and Scoob supposed to be?!
Shaggy and Scooby spy some equipment nearby. It looks like an X-Ray machine, the kind you would find in airport security to check the contents of bags, but this machine has a different function. It’s a wrapping machine and it apparently runs on magic. When an item goes through it comes out on the other side fully wrapped. Shaggy even demonstrates its magic with a yo-yo as when the toy goes through it’s wrapped, but when it returns to him it’s unwrapped! Shaggy and Scooby seem entertained by this device, but when they peer in for a closer look they don’t notice the bicycle on the conveyor belt behind them. We then cut back to the mayor explaining more about the situation to Fred, Velma, and Daphne. As he starts to mention the development of the star for the town tree, Shaggy and Scooby ride by on the bicycle only they’re completely covered in wrapping paper. The others just look at them in confusion, but no one mentions what they all saw. Instead, the mayor explains that the man in charge of creating the star keeps taking it back for revisions. Fred declares this a mysterious act and is eager to investigate it as a Christmas mystery! Velma just snaps at him to knock it off as the mystery they have to solve is the pterodactyl which Fred has already conceded is not a Christmas mystery! Fred acknowledges this, but says it’s all pointing them in one direction.
What is it, boy?! Did you find a clue?!
The Big Sad Eyes Orphanage! We cut to the same scene of the gang standing outside of it only now Velma is insisting, “No! No! No!” As she and Fred resume their argument about the mystery they’re trying to solve, Scooby starts sniffing around the grounds of the orphanage. He raises his head to reveal a red bow is stuck to it and Fred pounces. This is the first Christmas related clue they’ve found, which just prompts Velma to point out their mystery has nothing to do with Christmas and therefore this is no clue! On the contrary, there are more ribbons just like the one that got stuck to Scooby’s nose and as the gang follows the trail it’s Shaggy who notices that the Mystery Machine isn’t where they parked it. They look around and suddenly the van drops from the sky in pieces! The pterodactyl then swoops in and grabs both Scoob and Daphne! As it flies away, Daphne can be heard yelling, “Worst birthday ever!”
All of those years sharing a network with Batman have finally paid off for Fred!
Fred instructs the others to get in what remains of the Mystery Machine. They speed off after the dinosaur and as they do we get to hear what sounds like an instrumental rendition of Iggy Pop’s “Lust for Life” but with a Christmas vibe. It’s good chase music as Fred and the others speed after the death bird in what is now basically a convertible. They find the streets are too crowded to proceed though, so Fred snatches a sled from some kid and they commandeer a horse. Velma and Fred ride on the horse itself as it pulls the sled with Shaggy standing on it through the streets. Along the way, the pterodactyl knocks over a lighted Christmas display that features two novelty candy canes with a wreath between them. Fred grabs one of the candy canes and the wire affixed to it and uses it like a grappling hook to grab the pterodactyl’s neck. Bad move, as now Velma and Fred get pulled into the air and Shaggy nearly collides with a truck! He avoids it on his sleigh, but winds up going airborne and the whole gang ends up on a giant, inflatable, Santa which is from earlier in the episode. The pterodactyl collides with the big novelty decoration causing it to deflate. The gang, including Daphne and Scoob, safely descend back to ground level while the pterodactyl, once again, heads towards the moon.
There goes Christmas…
The gang, tired and bruised, are left sitting on the curb feeling like they blew it. Fred finally admits that his search for a Christmas miracle has done nothing but harm to their cause and declares it’s his fault Christmas is ruined. Daphne adds that he’s also ruined her birthday, in case he needed to feel worse. While they mope, a grumpy guy named Alistair Levinthal (Bennett) calls out from a shop just behind them asking what they did to his store? Velma tells him it was the pterodactyl, but the guy can’t be bothered as he needs to finish the star for the tree. This piece of information rekindles Fred’s holiday spirit as he stands up and declares he’s going to follow a star to solve this mystery. As he does, he’s once again bathed in light and accompanied by music thanks to George. The group heads inside the shop to question this Alistair fellow about his work. Turns out, he hates Christmas since it falls on him to design a lot of the town’s decorations. Velma points out he’s redesigned the star numerous times lately and he chalks it up to the mayor not sharing the dimensions of the tree accurately for him to design a star for. He adds that the mayor will be surprised once he gets a look at what he’s come up with this year which prompts Velma and Fred to share a knowing glance with each other. They leave the shop with some sense of renewed determination, though Shaggy, Scooby, and Daphne aren’t really sure what’s going on. Fred vows to save Christmas and as he does he stands in front of a painted tree on a storefront window. He takes on his epiphany pose, but George wasn’t ready and comes running over and upset with himself for missing his cue. Fred tells him not to worry, he improvised, and the others reassure George as well. How nice of them?
You bet we’re getting in that moon shot!
We then cut to the center of town and the giant Christmas tree which awaits its proper coronation. The massive star is bolted to the top and the mayor is given the okay to light it up. He does and the star is a truly magnificent sight, but immediately upon lighting it seems to draw the attention of an uninvited guest. The pterodactyl comes soaring in and grabs the star ripping the tree from the ground. As it takes off, the gang comes flying up behind it in the somehow still functioning Mystery Machine! As they chase after the pterodactyl, Fred’s focus is broken-up by Daphne slapping a red party hat on his head followed by a clown wig and red nose on Scooby. This is her last chance to celebrate, apparently. Fred refocuses on the pterodactyl and they’re able to speed in front of it. Daphne then proposes they stop the beast in its tracks with her preferred celebration: silly string! It looks just as cheap as before as the crew sprays the dinosaur in the face. It drops the tree, which manages to end up right where it belongs, but the Mystery Machine is damaged and finds itself in a dive bomb. Scooby reminds Fred about the treadmill, and as he turns to regard him his face smashes into Daphne’s cake giving him a Santa-like “beard” to go with his red, party, hat. Scooby and Shaggy jump onto the treadmill and start running which fires the engines back up allowing Fred to avert total catastrophe. As they level off, they pass in front of the full moon and I’m counting it. Moon shot! They come to a screeching halt on a nearby rooftop prompting a kid on the ground to ask “Santa?” The Mystery Machine slides off of the roof, but the whole crew pops up out of a snowbank triumphantly seemingly unhurt.
That’s right! Take those assholes to jail!
With the tree returned and all of the presents seemingly saved, all that’s left is to unmask the individuals behind this heinous crime against Christmas. The pterodactyl is all wrapped up and tangled in Christmas lights from crashing into them and is seemingly no longer a threat as the mayor, some cops, and the mystery gang gather round. The mayor thanks the kids for saving Christmas from a pterodactyl, but he’s told that’s no pterodactyl. A door on the beast pops open and inside is David! The assistant dressed as an elf from the dig site! Velma explains that it was David who discovered the preserved egg and tried to steal it for himself. He took it to city hall to disguise it as a Christmas present via the wrapping machine, but it ended up getting mixed up with the actual gifts for the tree, so he came up with a scheme to steal all of the presents to find it. And to do that, he needed help from someone mechanically inclined: Alistair Leventhal! Leventhal wanted out of town, so he agreed to help David for a cut of the proceeds once the egg was sold. This required him to redesign the star to David’s exact specifications so he could steal the tree.
You can just see the Christmas spirit radiating from this little orphan boy.
With the mystery solved, it’s now time to haul away the bad guys. David gets the honor of saying the “And we would have gotten away with it if it weren’t for you,” but Levinthal cuts him off by saying, “Oh, be quiet! We didn’t!” Now the orphans can have their presents, but there’s one kid (Griffin) who can’t seem to find his. It’s the same kid who was looking at the gang from inside the orphanage earlier, and Fred walks up and hands the boy a gift. Their eyes meet, both welling with tears, and Shaggy and Scoob embrace each other as they watch. The kid opens the present to find a giant egg! His demeanor shifts as he announces his gift in a deadpan manner adding, “You really know kids.” Fred is completely unphased while Shaggy and Scooby sob with joy. Velma points out that’s the missing pterodactyl egg and the mayor comes over to declare that since it was found on orphanage land that it’s the orphanage that should benefit from its sale. He even declares that they saved the orphanage! Velma can only muster a “You gotta be kidding me,” while Fred looks rather proud of himself. Meanwhile, the kid still looks irritated by his crappy gift.
Fred helped save Christmas and Daphne gets a birthday song – mission accomplished!
Fred announces that he couldn’t have asked for a better Christmas gift than this. The mayor then adds that since they saved Christmas they get to be the guests of honor at the Christmas feast. We then pan to find Shaggy and Scooby already devouring a bunch of food. Scooby, with a mouthful, seems to say his catchphrase and the mayor indicates he has no idea what the dog just said. Shaggy translates for him by saying Scooby said, “We’re way ahead of you!” Fred then puts an arm around Daphne and announces that there’s only one thing left for them to do: Everybody joined together in song! Daphne looks unsure of this suggestion as the others return to frame and start singing. The song is “Happy Birthday to Daphne” sung to the tune of “Hark! The Herald Angels Sing.” The song is literally just “Happy birthday, Daphne,” only they add a third syllable to her name making it “Daph-ah-nee.” The towns people also join together and they all sing the song and Daphne actually looks pleased by this development. When the song is over, Fred adds a final, “Happy birthday, Daphne.” She smiles and says, “Aww, thanks guys. And merry Christmas!” The camera pans up to the sky and this one is through.
I knew those crafty kids would solve the mystery and save Christmas, I just don’t know why it took them almost 50 years to do it! Actually, I think there’s been other Christmas specials featuring Scooby-Doo and the rest, but this is the first one I’ve seen. Be Cool, Scooby-Doo! isn’t the most visually impressive show, but it’s far from ugly. It’s bright, colorful, and there’s plenty of Christmas décor to find in this one. The personalities of the gang we know so well are largely intact, but I enjoyed Fred’s dedication to Christmas and the conflict this seemed to create between he and Velma. Daphne, Shaggy, and Scooby, the supposed star of the show, were surprisingly understated throughout this one. Daphne just had her birthday bit to stick to and it’s pretty much all she does while Scooby and Shaggy feel like they’re just along for the ride. I was surprised there wasn’t a concerted effort to give the pair funny lines or some humorous physical comedy bits, but really all they got was the brief interaction with the wrapping machine. Scooby barely has any lines and contributes very little to the plot. I don’t know if that’s how most episodes are or if this is an outlier. It certainly caught me off-guard.
The Mystery Machine being able to convert into a jet was certainly not something I expected going in.
Not that it’s necessarily a bad thing for Scooby to have a reduced role in this episode. Fred was basically the star with Velma his sidekick, to a point. It worked as I found him funny enough and I enjoyed seeing Velma push back on him. I like that he wasn’t made to be some idiot oblivious to the real issue, he just rejected it. The repeating bit with George was okay, but the repeating gag with the group returning to the orphanage over and over was better. I also enjoyed the absurdity of a pterodactyl terrorizing a town at Christmas. I don’t know how the Scooby-Doo faithful received this show, but it was a lot better than any of the stuff I grew up with. The only thing I found weird or wasn’t convinced was a great idea was the high-tech approach to the Mystery Machine. Do we really need that? I guess it makes things different, but it makes the group feel like an Inspector Gadget clone.
I can see the mystery component of the show being something hardcore Scooby fans might not be impressed with. It certainly wasn’t impressive in this episode, but I also think this show is aiming to make you laugh, not necessarily make you think. Our only clue that David was involved was pretty circumstantial at best. He was connected to city hall and the dig site and the only such character with a connection to both and our only clue the two were even connected were the bows Scooby found outside. Unless you want to count Fred forcing the issue of bringing Christmas into the mystery. The show made sure to point out that those bows were for gift wrapping and we saw the wrapping machine at city hall itself. Leventhal being involved was certainly not a surprise as he was angry and an inventor and I think the show expected the viewers to know he was at least partly responsible. Some modern Scooby shows have been willing to turn to real, supernatural, beings, but I figured this pterodactyl wasn’t an example of such a thing meaning it had to be a robot of some kind. It’s fine, I guess. Mysteries are hard to write and I can’t imagine needing to do 26 of them for a season of television so I’m not going to harp on it any further, but I’m also not a hardcore Scooby fan.
As far as Christmas specials go, this one was fun enough.
Given my experience with the Scooby-Doo franchise up until now, I suppose I can consider this episode of Be Cool, Scooby-Doo! a pleasant surprise considering I enjoyed my time with it. It’s not a classic, but it’s a worthy watch and it gives a venerable character like Scooby-Doo a legitimately good Christmas special, something more famous and better cartoon stars can’t say. If you would like to watch this one it was released on DVD some time ago. Despite probably being out of print, it’s not an expensive buy and you can get Season One Part One or Part Two for 10 bucks most places. There are digital versions available as well, and it is streaming on the Max platform and might be on Boomerang as well. Unfortunately, like most Warner owned specials, it doesn’t get shown on Cartoon Network much which should be able to provide a massive, Christmas, blow-out every year, but chooses not to. When will they learn?
Can’t wait until tomorrow for more Christmas? Check out what we had to say on this day last year and beyond:
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Today, we return to my best Christmas specials of all-time list with television’s first family: The Simpsons. The Simpsons are the brainchild of series creator Matt Groening who allegedly came up with the idea as a spur of the moment one when he needed something to pitch to the Fox Network. He essentially based The Simpsons on his own family and even borrowed some of the names of his family members for the now iconic characters of the show. The pitch was a success and The Simpsons became a segment on The Tracey Ullman Show. When it gained enough popularity that the Fox Network couldn’t ignore, the segment was spun-off into its own series.
When Fox decided to take a chance on The Simpsons it did so with some trepidation. TV people James L. Brooks and Sam Simon were added to the mix to give it some credibility, but the Fox Network was still young with inexperience at virtually every level of the operation. And the TV guys the network brought in had little experience with animation. Fox wasn’t willing to commit to a full season order, so 13 episodes were ordered for the first season. That inexperience with animation reared its head early when the very first episode, “Some Enchanted Evening,” came back from the overseas animator looking dreadful. Un-airable. The team didn’t understand how long retakes would take in animation nor did they realize how expensive they were. It’s not a big deal to do reshoots in live-action with a set that lives in perpetuity on a studio lot, but for animation someone has to re-draw, re-color, and re-edit the show.
Obviously, those growing pains would eventually pay dividends and The Simpsons is currently airing its 35th season. And it all started here. When “Some Enchanted Evening” came back so bad it called for a lot of changes, the show wouldn’t make its original air date so Fox decided to delay it to give it more time. As part of that delay, the Christmas episode was moved up. Now, The Simpsons could premiere as a Christmas special in December of 1989 with the rest of the season kicking off in 1990. It’s a bit unusual for a show to start with a Christmas episode, but not unheard of. The Fox animated series Life With Louie would do a Christmas special as a pilot a few years later which would turn into a series order for that show. And because today’s episode was the first to air, it’s now just recognized as the show’s first episode even though it wasn’t number 1 in production order.
The first season of The Simpsons is admittedly a little rough. It always takes a show time to find its voice and The Simpsons is no different. For a first episode though, this one is pretty damn good. The show knew it wanted the family to be a bit dysfunctional. So many television families of the past were rather wholesome with little conflict within the family unit that wasn’t just some trivial issue. That was changing in the 80’s and the sitcom Roseanne is often cited as one of the first shows willing to put a more “real” family on TV. Married…with Children went hard into that with a more farcical take while The Simpsons would land somewhere in-between. Being animation, the show could get a little out there when compared with a live-action sitcom while still retaining plot issues like job security and money.
And this first episode of The Simpsons very much deals with money issues. Financial stress around the holidays is definitely not unique to the Simpsons and many families deal with that every year. It’s exacerbated by the presence of Santa Claus who bestows presents on the good boys and girls of the world and coal on the bad ones. When Santa brings the rich kid down the street a new bike while the poor kid settles for a yo-yo, it’s bound to raise some questions on the playground. As a result, all parents feel pressured to shower their children with gifts whether they can afford it or not. I’m guilty of going a little nuts around the holidays, and while I’ve never spent outside my means, I do regret not setting expectations lower. Maybe one gift should be from Santa and the rest from mom and dad. It might not make the kid who gets little feel much better, but at least said kid isn’t left wondering why Santa treats him so poorly while the kid who doesn’t need any help is rewarded.
They must be pretty late if no one is even on the road.
Anyway, the unique flavor of this Christmas episode of The Simpsons is what makes it so endearing for me. It also doesn’t hurt that it has incredible historic significance by being the first of over 700 episodes and counting. Perhaps to give it more of a “Christmas Special” feel, the episode doesn’t begin with the usual show intro. We just get a quick jingle of the main theme (composed by Danny Elfman) with a graphic that reads “The Simpsons Christmas Special” super-imposed over a dark, snowy, backdrop. Homer (Dan Castellaneta), Marge (Julie Kavner), and Maggie are in the car heading for a school Christmas recital. Homer is driving rather erratically as they’re apparently late while Marge urges him to slow down.
“Pardon my goulashes.”
When the family arrives at the recital, late, they’re forced to awkwardly slip in to find seats. As they do so, Homer keeps calling out to other fathers he knows and who could forget Homer’s buddy Norman? Or Fred? Yeah, these are names we’ll never hear again. Even though Homer makes a remark to Norman about “getting dragged here too” he seems pretty cheerful and happy to be present, a far cry from how he feels about attending a thorough re-telling of the life of George Washington in Season Four.
A very odd color choice here.
Once they find their seats, Homer and Marge watch as Principal Skinner (Harry Shearer) introduces the presentations which are by class. Up next, a presentation of Santas from around the world by the second graders. It almost feels like there’s only one second grade class in this school which gives Springfield a very small town feel. I think in my town, a suburb in New Hampshire, we had around 12-15 classes per grade. Up first is possibly a proto-Janie (Pamela Hayden) to talk about German Santa who bestows gifts upon the good children and whipping rods on the parents of bad children to beat them with. We then hear from a proto-Ralph (Nancy Cartwright) who looks a little like Ralph Wiggum, but sounds nothing like him. He’s a Japanese priest who resembles Santa and his main feature is that he has eyes in the back of his head which the child demonstrates with a pair of spring-eyed glasses he’s wearing backwards. The crowd gasps as they fall out of place which feels very quaint by today’s standards. Finally, it’s Lisa’s (Yeardley Smith) turn who will be portraying a Polynesian Santa or something. It too causes the crowd to gasp because it involves a fire dance, or maybe they’re gasping because she looks like she isn’t wearing any pants? It’s an odd coloring choice as she’s wearing a straw skirt with virtually no coverage and her leggings are the same color as her flesh. Everyone applauds when she finishes either because they enjoyed it or because they’re just impressed she didn’t burn the place down.
“He’s the boy you love to hate!”
And now it’s time to hear from the fourth grade class – screw those stupid third graders! This is, of course, Bart’s (Cartwright) class and what’s America’s soon-to-be favorite little hellion going to do to ruin this pageant? Why, nothing more than change the words to “Jingle Bells.” You know the one, that famous school yard parody of unknown origin that turns the yuletide classic into a song about Batman’s poor hygiene. As the camera pans through the crowd of fourth-graders assembled on the stage, virtually none of them are recognizable. I did spot Lewis and Milhouse is in the first row, but the other faces are weird and unfamiliar. Before Bart breaks into his own rendition, Marge gets to comment on how angelic he is. Once he finishes his verse, a hand jumps into frame to yank him out of position. I assume it belonged to Skinner. Homer looks mad, then he looks bored as there’s a dissolve to indicate the passage of time and we can hear Skinner announcing the fifth grade performance. Behind Marge, there’s a woman without a nose which is creepy. Homer mutters aloud “How many grades does this school have?” and we fade out.
Christmas is coming, Simpsons.
We’re now at the home of the Simpson family! It’s decorated for Christmas and there’s a roaring fire. The kids are writing out their Christmas lists while Marge is working on a Christmas letter to send out. We hear her internal dictation to herself as she writes it. She notes that their cat died, but they replaced old Snowball with a new cat – Snowball II. Snowball II can be seen getting tangled in a box of Christmas lights which Homer is trying to untangle. It also should be noted the joke here is that the dead cat was a white one and appropriately named Snowball while the new one is a black cat, but they just kept the name anyway. Marge writes about how Grandpa is still alive and as feisty as ever and boasts about how well Lisa is doing in school. When she gets to Bart she just writes, “…well, we love Bart,” and lets that be it. Homer angrily barks at her asking if she finished that “stupid” letter yet prompting Marge to write “Homer sends his love,” before putting the finishing touches on it.
I tried to get the twister mouth captured, but it was driving me nuts, so here’s this relatively bland image instead.
Homer resumes his demands of Marge as he can’t seem to locate the extension chord. Marge snaps back that it’s where it should be – in the utility drawer. Good for Marge for standing up for herself. Homer softens and apologizes and blames it all on his excitement for the holidays. He then retrieves the extension chord from the drawer and we get a sort of “d’oh!” out of him when he finds it all tangled. Marge then asks the kids for their lists and indicates that she’ll send them to Santa right away. This prompts Bart to mutter, through a classic Simpsons twister mouth expression, “Oh please, there’s only one fat guy who brings presents and his name ain’t Santa.” You can tell the show wasn’t really going after the kid market in the beginning otherwise such a line wouldn’t exist.
This is just the beginning of Homer’s hatred of Patty and Selma.
Marge is then dismayed to see that the only thing Lisa wants is a pony and Bart wants a tattoo. Bart tries to justify his desire by saying they last forever, but Homer tells him he’s not getting one. If Bart wants a tattoo he’ll have to pay for it himself! Well, at least he tried. The phone rings and Homer answers it. On the other line is one of Marge’s sisters who just asks for Marge. Homer tries asking who is calling, but she just keeps asking for Marge as she clearly wants nothing to do with Homer. This just angers Homer, but he finally hands the phone to Marge and we find out it’s her sister Patty (Kavner). She indicates that she and her twin sister Selma (also Kavner) would be delighted to spend Christmas Eve with their baby sister. Marge tells her that she and Homer would be delighted to see them too and Patty, correctly, notes that Homer is probably not very enthusiastic about it. She then starts to complain about Homer as the scene fades out.
Don’t be confused, this is an image of the lights turned on. Nice attention to detail by having Homer’s imprint still in the snow.
When the next scene fades in, we find Homer on the roof in a rather precarious position as he attempts to hang Christmas lights. He does the predictable thing and falls, but there’s a nice pile of powder for him to land on so he’s no worse for ware. Homer then calls the kids over to plug in the lights. For some reason, he’s also wearing a tie now. Maybe this is the next night after work? Anyway, Homer calls for Marge to turn them on and it’s a rather pathetic display as only a couple of lights are working. Lisa adds a “Nice try, Dad,” while Bart can’t even muster up an insult and just hangs his head with a groan. Homer seems pleased though, at least until his neighbor Ned Flanders (Shearer) shouts over to ask him what he thinks of his display? He plugs it in and it’s pretty spectacular compared with Homer’s as all of the lights are working and there’s even an animated Santa on the roof. The kids stare at it in awe while Homer complains it’s too bright and crosses his arms angrily to mutter to himself.
The fabled big jar of money!
The next morning, Marge tells the kids over breakfast that she’s heading to the mall for Christmas shopping, and if they want to go too, they should go get their money. They’re pretty excited about going to the mall because it’s 1989 and that’s where all the action is! With them out of the kitchen, Homer is able to prod Marge about her secret stash of Christmas money. She tells him to close his eyes so as not to reveal her hiding place and when he does we find out it’s a big jar she keeps hidden in her giant hair. Marge must have amazing neck strength. Homer opens his eyes and remarks on how big the jar is this year as it’s full of bills and coins.
These things always seem like such a good idea at the time.
At the mall, Marge and Lisa go off shopping basically leaving Bart to his own whims. He soon happens upon a tattoo parlor and notices a display containing a heart design that says “Mother” on it. Bart fantasizes how such a tattoo would be received by his own mother which confirms to him that she thinks it’s a wonderful present that makes him look dangerous. Since Bart’s imagination is infallible, he heads to the counter and demands “One mother, please.” The tattoo artist curtly asks how old he is and Bart cheerfully responds with “21 my good man!” The guy simply responds with “Get in the chair.” According to the episode commentary, the writers struggled with how to get Bart into the tattoo chair because who would agree to tattoo a 10 year old? This simple line was what they settled on and I think it works. The line delivery by Harry Shearer is also perfect in selling this guy’s “I don’t care” attitude.
A Season One look at the office of C. Montgomery Burns. Interesting that the stuffed bear would remain a mainstay.
We cut to the Springfield Nuclear Power Plant which has a festive banner at the entrance denoting the time of year. We find Homer inside doing something he rarely does: work. He’s looking at some gauges and noting the readings on a clipboard. This is still Homer though and it would appear he’s doing a bad job as one meter rises abruptly and another is flashing red. The intercom comes on and it’s the voice of Waylon Smithers (Shearer) who is set to introduce Mr. Burns (Shearer) for an important announcement. Despite Smithers requesting that all employees continue working through this announcement, Homer puts his clipboard down and starts munching on a donut. He’s soon joined by several other, random, workers as Mr. Burns makes his announcement. He is pleased to report that they have improved plant safety without affecting consumer costs or management pay raises. Unfortunately, for the other “semi-skilled” workers, as he puts it, this means there will be no Christmas bonus this year. Dejected, the other workers disperse while Homer looks pretty distressed and thanks God for the big jar of money.
Lasers: very expensive and not for the groin.
Naturally, this means the big jar of money is in serious plot jeopardy. We go back to the mall and Marge spots her precious little guy in the chair at the tattoo parlor. She storms in and yanks the boy out mid-tattoo turning his intended “Mother” tattoo into one that says “Moth.” She drags him by the arm, his recently tattooed arm, a few stores down which just so happens to be a laser surgery center. I can’t say I ever saw such a place in a mall, but it does make good business sense to have one located near a tattoo parlor. The technician (Shearer) tells Marge they can remove the tattoo, but it’s a costly procedure that requires an upfront, cash, payment. Marge just looks at the big jar of money she’s carrying in despair and adds a “Thank God for Homer’s Christmas bonus.” Oh Marge, you poor fool! With the payment seemingly made, Bart can get the procedure. As the laser warms up, we get to hear one of Bart’s catchphrases, “Aye carumba!” The technician then instructs him not to squirm as you wouldn’t want to get this laser near your eye or your groin. Apparently, getting the word groin past the censors was a minor battle the show won.
Just in case there wasn’t a penny lurking in there, she turns it upside down.
It’s time to head back to 742 Evergreen Terrace (well, technically, in Season One the address had yet to be decided, but you get the idea) where Bart is sitting on the couch watching TV while Lisa pokes his new arm injury. She pokes, he says “Ow! Quit it,” and we repeat. Maggie also gets in on it. I actually really like this gag. Homer comes home to hear the bad news. Lisa is almost too eager to tell her father that the family had to blow the Christmas jar on laser surgery for Bart. Homer takes one look at that empty jar, which Marge turns upside down and shakes for added dramatic effect, and immediately begins wailing about Christmas being cancelled. Marge then assures her husband things will be okay because they still have his Christmas bonus. If you think this is the part where Homer tells the family he’s not getting a bonus this year then you have clearly never watched a sitcom. Homer just acts like he’s just remembering he has that bonus coming and no one in the family appears to pick up on the fact that he’s lying. Homer then exits the house through the kitchen, which is somehow the front door. One of the fun aspects to watching Season One of this show now is how crazy the layout of the house gets. Some shots will just have endless entryways in the background, or even in this past scene, Marge enters into the living room via the den, but when camera cuts back to her it’s the kitchen that’s behind her.
A lot of early episodes of The Simpsons feature Homer and Marge in bed.
Homer takes a sad look at his crappy Christmas decorations and the camera pans to the home of the Flanders so we can get a better sense of how inferior Homer’s Christmas is shaping up in comparison. He can’t even muscle up a “Stupid Flanders,” comment, only hang his head in shame. The scene then shifts to one of Marge and Homer in bed. Marge can tell something is bothering Homer and that he’s hiding something from her as well. When she brings up the subject of his Christmas bonus, Homer gets a chance to come clean, but instead of doing so makes up a lie about wanting to do the Christmas shopping this year. Marge is happy to hand over the list to her husband as that’s one less thing she has to worry about and she rolls over to go to sleep. With the lights out, we can still see the white of Homer’s eyes and his unsure smile.
Can’t be forgetting little Maggie’s Christmas present.
The next day, Homer heads out to do said Christmas shopping. His venue of choice? Not the mall, that’s much too expensive, for he has come to the seldom seen Circus of Values. I don’t think this store ever resurfaces in the future. Homer is monologuing his shopping decisions, which is very convenient for us viewers, as he picks out gifts for the family. Marge is getting pantyhose, Bart some pads of paper, and Maggie gets a squeak toy intended for dogs that’s shaped like a porkchop. Lisa apparently gets nothing. As Homer leaves with his lone bag of “gifts,” he bumps into Flanders outside. Ned couldn’t see him because his arms were piled high with wrapped gifts which are now all over the sidewalk. Ned apologizes then takes note of the mess before them and how tricky it will be to sort out what’s what. As he starts picking stuff up with a “One of mine,” for each, Homer growls back “They’re all yours!” since he has his lone bag in-hand. To add further insult to injury, Todd Flanders (Pamela Hayden, and the credits actually list this as Rod Flanders, but it’s clearly Todd) has picked up Homer’s porkchop and offers it back to him which he angrily snatches from the youth’s hand. Mind you, this looks extra pathetic as the Simpson family doesn’t currently own a dog. The two Flanders then head off to wherever it is they’re off to with Todd telling his dad that this will be the best Christmas ever! Does anybody ever make such a statement unironically in real life?
This version of Moe’s Tavern is basically free of dank.
Feeling pretty low, Homer heads to his favorite watering hole: Moe’s Tavern. Here, the grumpy Moe (Hank Azaria) is sporting a festive Santa hat and is overseeing a pretty well-decorated bar. The Moe of later seasons would never go this far to decorate his place. He also has black hair and a pink apron, two things that will change before the season is concluded. He asks Homer what’s wrong and notes he’s been sucking on a beer all day. He even offers Homer a candy cane to cheer him up – who is this guy?! Barney (Castellaneta) enters and announces drinks all around! Which is just he and Homer. He’s decked out in a Santa suit and Homer prods why. Barney tells him he got a job playing Santa down at the mall as he downs almost an entire mug of beer in one swig. Homer asks if he thinks he could get a job doing that and Barney cautions him by saying “They’re very selective,” before unleashing his classic belch. In case you were unaware, Barney is named after Barney Rubble as the writers thought it would be funny to give Homer a loser Barney as a best friend.
These Santas look more than a little strung out.
We cut to Homer on a job interview for this Santa program. The man conducting the interview (Shearer) wants to know if Homer likes kids and his response is “All the time?” He’s clearly not good at this stuff. The guy just frowns and Homer picks up on it and reassures the man that he does indeed like children. He’s hired on the spot, but is then given the bad news that he has to go through Santa training. This takes us to perhaps one of the more enduring scenes from this episode as a room full of men dressed as Santa are robotically belting out “Ho ho ho,” from desks. The laughter, if you want to call it that, is interrupted by Homer raising his hand to ask the trainer (also Shearer, the guy voices almost everyone in this thing) when they get paid. He’s told “Not a dime until Christmas Eve,” and the men in the room resume their “Ho ho ho” routine only with much less enthusiasm.
There aren’t many bullet-headed characters in future episodes.
Next we find Homer in front of the class trying to recall the names of Santa’s reindeer. He gets the first three right, then guesses Nixon, followed by Comet, Cupid, Donna Dixon. The trainer just curtly tells him to sit down. It then cuts to Homer seated with a smile on his face while the trainer sits on his lap. They’re role-playing how a visit with Santa might go, and when the trainer accuses him of being a fake, Homer’s response is to punch him in the face. The trainer prevents him from doing so and gets him to calm down and instructs him that he’s supposed to just lie to get out of such a sticky situation by saying he’s one of Santa’s helpers. Homer reassures himself that he knew that and this is apparently all the training he’s getting.
Even the kids can’t stand them.
Homer enters the house, exhausted, and Marge is there to ask him why he’s seven hours late. He tells her he doesn’t want to talk about it and is heading straight for the tub. I feel like no one does that anymore, or maybe people with fancy tubs or hot tubs do. I, like the Simpsons, have a pretty basic bath tub and I wouldn’t dream of taking a bath in it. Marge tells Homer that her sisters are here which forces a shudder from Homer. He slinks into the living room to say hi while Bart and Lisa are relieved to see their father as it means getting away from the clutches of their aunts. They both latch onto one of his legs as Homer greets the twins doing a very poor job of masking his dislike for them. When he wishes them a “Merry Christmas,” they both sort of snort in response and point out how you can’t tell it’s Christmas in this house because there’s no tree. Homer angrily responds that he was just about to go get one. Bart and Lisa run after him asking if they can tag along, but their father snaps at them with a “No!” before storming out.
Does Homer always keep a chainsaw in his trunk or did he take it from the garage knowing this is how his night was going to end up?
Homer heads out into the night to the tune of “Winter Wonderland.” We see him drive by lot after lot of Christmas trees all with a posted price that is apparently out of his price range. And with good reason, the first one wants $75 a tree. In 1989, $75 was like $180 today and that’s pretty insane for a tree. I think I paid $65 for my tree last year and it was at one of those farms where you pick out your own tree and cut it down. I haven’t bought a lot tree since I was a kid, so I’m not sure if what I do costs more money or less. As Homer drives, he passes other lots and the price is going down, but not by much. The last one we see is advertising slightly irregular trees for $45 that look like something out of a Dr. Seuss book so Homer does the only sensible thing: he sneaks onto someone’s property and cuts his own tree! We just see him as a shadowy figure with the sound of a chainsaw echoing around him. Dogs are unleashed, there’s some gunfire, but Homer escapes unharmed.
It’s never a bad idea to bribe Santa, kid.
Back at home, everyone is impressed with Homer’s tree while Selma points out there’s a birdhouse in it. Homer just says it’s an ornament, but I doubt he’s fooling his sisters-in-law who are at least kind enough to just drop the subject. We end the scene with Patty asking if she smells gun powder. Now, it’s mall time and Homer is in the big guy’s chair! Some little kid (Cartwright) is asking him for a bunch of stuff, but Homer tells him he doesn’t need all of that junk since he probably has a good home and a loving father who would do anything for him. The kid has no response, so Homer just asks him for a bite of his donut. The scene ends with the photographer snapping a picture of Homer Santa taking a very generous bite out of said donut and the kid doesn’t look too happy.
Oh, that Bart!
From a nearby balcony, Bart, Milhouse (Hayden), and Lewis (Cartwright) are all watching this unfold. None of the kids recognize Homer and they’re poking fun at the kids who actually buy into this Santa grift. Bart dares Milhouse, who appears to be dressed in a Santa suit himself, to sit on his lap, but Milhouse counters with a dare for Bart to yank his beard. Bart, not being one to back down, accepts this dare and makes his way towards Santa. When he’s seated on Homer’s lap, Homer lets out a yelp at the sight of his own kid, but then tries to play it cool by asking him his name. This is where we get another classic Bart line of “I’m Bart Simpson, who the Hell are you?” Homer just growls in response, “I’m jolly old Saint Nick.” Bart declares they’ll just see about that as he gives Homer’s beard a tug and we get another picture shot. This time it’s Homer’s beard being pulled down and a shocked Bart realizing who is in costume here.
This is the most awe Bart will ever have for his father.
Homer scoops up his boy in his arms and angrily storms off to a prop house in the back for a little heart-to-heart. Now is when Homer finally comes clean to someone about his lack of a bonus. Bart is actually impressed with his father and points out how low he’s willing to sink to make sure he and the family have a good Christmas. It’s not the nicest phrasing, but Bart’s smile indicates he’s sincere and Homer seems touched. He then heads back out to resume his duty as the big guy, but after saying “Hi” to all of the children he smacks his head on the door frame and utters some mild profanity which seems to alarm some of the mothers nearby.
Not even in 1989 would 13 bucks get you very far.
With the job done, all that is left to do is collect a big, fat, check! Bart apparently decided to spend the rest of the day at his father’s side as he’s joined him in the line for checks with the other Santas. Homer sees this as an opportunity to teach Bart the value of work, but when he’s handed a check for a meager $13 all of that is ruined. He demands of the teller to explain how his pay was only $13 only to find out they deducted things from his pay like the cost of the suit, training, and other stuff. It was supposed to be a check for over 100 bucks which probably would have done a decent job of acquiring gifts in 1989, but 13 bucks won’t get you anything.
Is Barney Gumble the harbinger of miracles to come?!
Homer, defeated, plops down on a couch while Bart suggests they just head home. Then we hear the voice of Barney offscreen overjoyed at receiving a check for “Thirteen big ones!” Homer doesn’t understand why Barney is so happy only to find out that Barney has plans for this money. He’s heading to the dog track where a can’t miss pup by the name of Whirlwind is fixing to turn this 13 bucks into something more. He encourages Homer to come along, but Homer finds the idea of taking his kid to a sleazy dog track on Christmas Eve rather distasteful. This is when Bart chimes in that this is how all of the Christmas miracles in TV happen. Apparently he’s self aware as he lists off some of television’s miracle benefators at Christmas including Tiny Tim, Charlie Brown, and The Smurfs. Homer seems convinced, and I bet a Season 3 Homer would be enthusiastic about following the lessons taught by TV, but this one just asks “Who’s Tiny Tim?” as they head out.
Well it looks like one Simpsons kid is having a pretty swell Christmas, at least.
At the Simpson house, Patty and Selma are present along with Grandpa (Castellaneta) Simpson for Christmas Eve. They’re watching a Christmas special on TV starring the Happy Little Elves, a sort of parody of The Smurfs seldom seen after the first season. Lisa is reacting to the show in earnest fashion while the adults, mostly Grandpa, can’t stand it. It’s then pointed out by Patty that Homer is late and Marge says he told him that he was going caroling with Bart. This then smash cuts to Barney and Bart singing “We’re in the Money” as they make their way into the dog track. Homer still can’t believe he’s doing this, and that feeling only mounts when he gets a look at Whirlwind and declares the dog a scrawny little bag of bones. Bart, who is now wearing Homer’s Santa hat and looking pretty adorable, points out that all of the dogs are scrawny little bags of bones. There’s also a brief exchange between another father and son where the kid asks if they can open their gifts now with the dad retorting “You know the tradition son, not until the 8th race.” It’s hilariously sad.
Bart’s not a very bright kid, but he still may be smarter than his father.
As Barney makes his way to the counter to place his bet, a voice (Shearer) comes over the loudspeaker to announce that number 8 is being replaced with a new dog: Santa’s Little Helper. Homer hears this name and thinks it’s a sign. He expresses his enthusiasm towards Bart who tells his father it’s just a coincidence. Even when they get the odds on the dog, 99 to 1, Homer still isn’t dismayed. He sees it as an opportunity, but Bart informs him that he has a bad feeling about this. Homer basically begs his son to trust in him because it’s all he has and Bart decides to go along so as to spare his father’s feelings. There’s no changing his dad’s mind anyway as he bets it all on Santa’s Little Helper.
Lisa with a very smart defense of her father. If only he could have been there to hear it.
Back at the house, everyone is still watching (and not enjoying) The Happy Little Elves. Well, Lisa is, that is until she overhears her aunt Patty refer to her father as a “doofus.” When she asks her aunt what she said, Patty just nonchalantly informs her that she’s just trashing her father. Lisa then, rather calmly, sticks up for her father, “Well, I wish you wouldn’t, because aside from the fact that he has the same frailties as all human beings he is the only father I have. Therefore, he is my model of manhood and my estimation of him will govern the prospects of my adult relationships so I hope that you bare in mind that any knock at him is a knock at me and I am far too young to defend myself against such onslaughts.” Patty has nothing to say aside from “Watch your cartoon, dear.” She put that old bat in her place!
Well, at least they’re only out 13 bucks.
It’s race time down at the track and Homer and Bart are up against the railing to take it all in. Homer encourages Bart to kiss the ticket for good luck and then the dogs are off! The two enthusiastically cheer on their chosen champion until it’s announced that he’s currently in last place, and pretty far back at that. Bart just tries to tell his dad that this is when the miracle happens and the two resume their cheering and are hooting and hollering as…Whirlwind crosses the finish line. Bart is dumbfounded and can only conclude that television has been lying to him. Homer bangs his head on the railing, a terrific use of foley, and then says he doesn’t want to leave until their dog finishes. The shot holds for a solid 3 seconds or so before Homer gives up and says they can leave. That’s probably my favorite joke in the whole episode.
So is Daria a girlfriend? Prostitute? Some random girl Barney met at the track?
Out in the parking lot, Homer and Bart are picking up discarded tickets and hoping to stumble upon an accidentally discarded winner. They’re soon interrupted by Barney who comes driving by in a convertible, on Christmas Eve, in a cold climate. It’s a choice, but he’s in the money! He doesn’t seem to know that Homer didn’t follow his advice as he just asks “What did I tell ya – Whirlwind!” He then burps and says to his lady friend “Let’s go, Daria.” For years, many fans insisted that Barney said “diarrhea” instead of Daria, but once the DVDs came out we could see for certain that he was saying Daria. I, for one, always heard Daria.
Welcome to the family, boy.
With Barney gone and no winning tickets found, Homer and Bart hang their heads and presumably start heading for the car. They then hear shouting as an angry voice declares “You came in last for the last time!” We don’t know it now, but the voice belongs to Les Moore (Azaria) and he’ll return in a future episode. For now, all we need to know about him is that he’s the present owner of Santa’s Little Helper and he no longer wants to be. Bart points the dog out as he races across the parking lot and leaps into Homer’s arms! Bart immediately asks if they can keep him, but Homer is still mad at this dog for coming in last. He starts trying to justify why they shouldn’t keep him, “But he’s a loser! He’s pathetic! He’s…” and then the dog licks him and Homer smiles, “…a Simpson.” Gets me every time.
Always deliver the bad new first.
One last trip to 742 Evergreen Terrace is in order. At this point, Grandpa has fallen asleep, the cartoon is way past over, and Patty and Selma are frothing at the mouth waiting to see what state Homer eventually returns in. Marge is just wondering if she should call the police when the door opens and Homer enters. He announces that he has a confession to make, and Patty and Selma get real excited at this. He starts to detail how he didn’t get his bonus, and that he tried to keep it from ruining their Christmas, but he doesn’t get to finish his sad speech as Bart come bursting in with a “Look what we got!”
Aww, he’s kissing the baby!
It’s Santa’s Little Helper, and basically everyone gets excited at the news. Well, except Patti and Selma who seem disappointed that Homer didn’t fail. Lisa declares that love at first sight is real while Bart adds that if he runs away he’ll be easy to catch. Marge adds a “God bless him” in her husband’s direction and tells him this is the best gift that he could possibly give them. Homer can only respond with “It is?” as Marge explains to him that it’s something to express their love. Lisa then asks what the dog’s name is and Homer says, “Number 8 – I mean, Santa’s Little Helper.” The picture gimmick is used for a third time to make a sort of Simpsons Christmas card that reads “Merry Christmas from The Simpsons” and I just love how even Grandpa looks thrilled about the dog.
It may be corny, but I do enjoy the Christmas card ending.
It’s not over though! As the credits roll, the family gathers around to sing “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer” with Grandpa at the piano. Maggie races back and forth on the back of the new family dog while everyone else sings. Bart, in a callback to how this thing started, does the school yard thing of interjecting comments between the verse. “You would even say it glows – like a light bulb!” This angers Homer, and even Lisa gets in on it. Marge tells Homer to take it away and solo the part of Santa Claus asking Rudolph to guide his sleigh, but Homer doesn’t know the words and makes them up, “Rudolph with your nose over here, so you can guide my sleigh…today.” Grandpa adds a disappointed “Oh Homer.” The song finishes with Bart trying to liken Rudolph to Attila the Hun, but he doesn’t finish the line due to his father strangling him, which we don’t actually see as it’s just a shot of the home’s exterior.
Even Patty and Selma look like they’re having a good time.
That’s how the very first Simpsons Christmas special, and very first episode overall, ends. It’s not just a Christmas Special, but a pretty monumental episode of television because The Simpsons has become such a cultural institution over the years. It’s pretty crazy that it all started here. Showrunner Al Jean has floated the idea of whenever it comes time to do a final episode that it should end where this one begins creating one big loop. That would be appropriate for a show that routinely ignores the passage of time and even changes the past to suit the current era. Homer and Marge began the show as baby boomers and are now considered millennials. I can recall being excited when I reached Bart’s age and now I’m Homer’s. That’s nuts!
As Christmas Specials go, this one borrows a little bit from Christmas Vacation. The patriarch, in this case Homer, wants the family to have a great Christmas, but when his company fails to pay out a bonus that’s become an expected part of his income each year it throws a wrench into everything. For Clark Griswald, it manifests as anxiety throughout the film until the big payoff. The problem is then righted by the bonus getting restored, and then some. For Homer, no such miracle occurs, but he at least falls ass backwards into an unwanted dog which serves as the family’s Christmas present that year. We don’t see the kids wake up to an empty tree on Christmas morning, but they can be assumed to have done so. Well, actually Bart got some paper and Maggie a chew toy which I suppose went to Santa’s Little Helper. It’s probably a good thing that the special ends where it does.
Maybe not a miracle, but this one worked out for the Simpsons thanks to this very good boy.
As an episode of The Simpsons, this very early episode contains some of the sarcastic elements we’d find in later seasons, but the pacing is definitely slower. Scene transitions are mostly of the fade in and fade out model and very little of what we see would be deemed outrageous. There are still plenty of hallmarks in place though that will remain so for the show’s duration. Homer tends to respond with violence towards his son and there’s never been any love lost between he and his sisters-in-law. Other stuff is changed though like Ned Flanders being more of a rival to just a true annoyance with a religious component. Principal Skinner is also a rather poor public speaker as he mixes up words and that was going to be a gimmick for him that was dropped. And obviously the overall look of the show has changed quite a bit over the years.
I do love all of the Season One oddities, like this lady with no nose seated behind Marge.
I do love this one, partly because I love The Simpsons, but also because it’s a relatable look at a lower middle class Christmas and how easy it is for the holiday to go wrong. I mentioned how it’s a bit surprising that the show is willing to essentially confirm that Santa isn’t real and that’s because the show became such a hit with children in the months that followed. And the show has never gone back on that either. While the show did avoid Christmas for years after this episode feeling they couldn’t really top it, when the show eventually got back into the Christmas Spirit the subject of Santa was never really addressed. Bart doesn’t see Santa as a way to get Bonestorm, we don’t see evidence of him being there and delivering a fire truck, and so on. And that’s fine, not every show need pander to the children, but it does cross my mind every time I watch this episode with my own kids who are still, just barely, in the believe zone.
If you would like to view this holiday classic this year then the easiest way to do so is via Disney+. The Simpsons is on-demand there and Disney even organizes all of the Christmas episodes in one spot. I believe the show also still airs on FXX or FX which will show all of the Christmas episodes this month. The episode is also part of the fist season which is available on DVD and usually for pretty cheap since it’s no one’s favorite season. There’s also an out of print Simpsons Christmas DVD out there that also usually isn’t too expensive. Society agrees that this one is a classic so getting it on your TV should be rather painless.
Can’t wait until tomorrow for more Christmas? Check out what we had to say on this day last year and beyond:
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Come 1996 the Nicktoons were an established brand. Launched in 1991, Nickelodeon had tremendous success with the likes of Rugrats and The Ren & Stimpy Show and soon more shows followed. Nickelodeon seemed to be a bit stingy with their in-house shows when it came to renewals as when a network looks to renew a successful show, it often has to pay more per episode to bring everyone back. That may have been why there seemed to always be new shows in the pipeline. The original block of 3 shows soon became 4 when Rocko’s Modern Life was added, and then gradually more shows were added and some would be dropped from the Sunday morning timeslot.
I kept up with Nicktoons for the first several years, but I started to drift away as I entered my teens. The last Nicktoon I remember being excited about was Aaaah! Real Monsters which launched in 1994 and I probably only followed the first batch of episodes from that show. I was moving towards the edgier stuff and sleeping in on Sundays so Nicktoons were no longer appointment viewing for me. One show I really only experienced through osmosis was Hey Arnold!Hey Arnold! premiered in 1996 and was a far more grounded show than the Nicktoons that had preceded it. Doug was the only direct comparable as that too centered on just some kid of middle school age trying to navigate adolescence. Only Doug was interested in tooning things up as the character Porkchop was a true cartoon dog in that he possessed unreasonable intelligence and communication skills. Plus Doug was always dipping into his imagination which allowed the show to go places a typical school setting couldn’t provide. With Arnold, we really don’t get any of that. Arnold is just a kid who lives with his grandparents who run a small apartment building in the city. He has friends, kids he’s not on good terms with, and mostly the show could be described as a slice of life piece.
Where Arnold distinguishes himself is via his good nature. He is a very empathic individual without a mean bone in his body. He can get angry with others, but he’s not retaliatory or mean-spirited. He’s comfortable voicing his concerns and mostly he seems to just want to make the world a better place in any way that he can. The character is a creation of Craig Bartlett and he actually originated in a pretty foreign place compared to this show: Pee-Wee’s Playhouse. Bartlett created the character for that show which may explain his unusual design featuring the football-shaped head. He liked Arnold enough to retain control of the character and centered a show around him, which Nickelodeon picked up. The show itself seeks to portray a modern, urban, setting and how kids in the city behave and interact with each other. There are certainly some more “wacky” premises to certain episodes, but my overall impression of the show always came back to that it’s very grounded compared to its contemporaries.
The real question is: did Arnold make that snowman, or Helga?
I say I experienced Hey Arnold! largely through osmosis because it was never a show I sought out. My sister liked it and if I was using our family computer it meant she had control of the television in the same room so that’s how I saw a lot of this period of Nickelodeon. I don’t know how much of the show I saw. I certainly saw enough to know who Arnold was and who his best friend was. I knew Helga was the school bully with a bad homelife who harbored a secret crush for little football head. I knew Arnold didn’t have parents, but I don’t know if it was ever explained why. And I knew the show had a Christmas episode in its first season. It’s one of the few episodes I can recall with any specificity as it was surprising in how moving it was. I say surprising, but for anyone who watched the show regularly, I don’t think it was. For me coming at it as just another Nicktoon, I wasn’t expecting to be moved to tears by its resolution. Because it wasn’t a favorite show of mine, I kind of lost track of it resulting in “Arnold’s Christmas” being something close to a one and done for me as opposed to an annual viewing. When I compiled my updated list of the 25 best Christmas specials, it was one I considered, but ultimately declined to include. Consider this entry a re-appraisal of “Arnold’s Christmas” as I know many people younger than me absolutely consider it among the best of the best and likely the best Christmas special produced by Nickelodeon.
Helga is about to drop some Christmas wisdom on poor Phoebe.
Like many Christmas episodes, this one foregoes the usual opening title for a more festive one. We see many scenes of kids playing in the snow and some of the tenants of the apartment building are skating over frozen streets. There’s an Arnold-shaped snowman and the whole sequence is set to an original instrumental by series composer Jim Lang that sounds vaguely “Christmas” without actually sourcing some public domain music. As the music fades out, we see the kids running in the street and the camera soon finds Helga (Francesca Marie Smith) walking on a sidewalk with her only friend, Phoebe (Anndi McAfee). Phoebe is delighted by the presence of Christmas all around them, but when she asks Helga what she likes best about this time of year she gets the very Helga response of “Presents, dummy!” Well, not exactly, but that’s her tone as she details her feelings on the holiday which can be distilled to getting as much stuff as possible before it’s all over.
Nancy Spumoni is like some sort of living Barbie?
Soon, Helga’s gaze finds a store display advertising Nancy Spumoni snow boots.This is apparently her version of the Red Ryder BB gun as she details all of the features of the boots as she circles the display practically drooling over them. Another kid, Rhonda (Olivia Hack), chimes in to remind Helga that this is the hot item basically all of the girls their age wants this year and they’re hard to come by. Helga dismisses her take as she’s feeling confident she’ll get what she wants this year. And if she doesn’t, it sounds like she intends to make sure her parents pay somehow. Possibly physically.
Gerald and Marge Simpson could probably share stories on hats.
We then cut to Arnold (Toran Caudell) walking with his best friend Gerald (Jamil Walker Smith). Gerald is carrying a shopping bag which makes it look like they just got done with some Christmas shopping. Arnold is asking Gerald what he got each member of his family and Gerald responds that he got a tie for each one, including his four-year-old sister. Arnold tells him he can’t just get ties for everyone on his list and shares his philosophy on gift-giving which is that each gift you give should mean something and come from the heart. Gerald appears to be moved by this and decides he can give the tie he got for his sister to his grandfather and find her a toy or something. He then takes off and when Arnold asks where he’s going he tells him to the store to return the present he got for Arnold. Arnold just smiles, and as he walks off we see Helga had been eavesdropping on the conversation. As Arnold walks off, she goes into her usual routine of listing off the things about Arnold she despises before a switch seems to flip in her head and she does a 180 and lists off all of the things she adores about him. She vows to get him the perfect gift for Christmas, something that will cause him to pine for her the way she does him, and as she wraps an arm around a lamppost a delivery truck passes by splashing mud all over her.
This guy Oskar is kind of a dick.
We shift to the apartment building Arnold resides in and get a peek at Mr. Hyunh (Baoan Coleman) ascending the stoop to enter the building. He pauses and looks over his shoulder just before he enters and the wind appears to whisper something. He enters and walks into a festive setting. Arnold’s grandmother, Gertrude (Tress MacNeille), appears to be finishing up decorating the tree and shouts “Happy Thanksgiving!” to all of the tenants present in the common area. I don’t know if it’s a joke that she says Happy Thanksgiving or if it actually is Thanksgiving. The events that follow don’t appear to last a month, but I suppose there could be a big time-jump that’s not explained. Arnold’s grandpa, Phil (Dan Castellaneta), announces they can now draw names for their annual secret Santa. Oskar (Steve Viksten) passes around a bowl and everyone pulls a name, only they’re all Oskar. They call him on his bullshit and he just laughs it off before they pass out the real names. From what little I remember of this show, I do recall Oskar being a selfish d-bag who mostly gets away with it due to his cheerful disposition. Phil requests Gertrude play some Christmas music as they start over and she starts playing “Yankee Doodle” on the piano which is a lowkey funny joke as no one reacts to it. I’m starting to think grandma is just a wee-bit senile. They all take a name, including Arnold, who gets Mr. Hyunh. He looks at the older fellow with a look of disappointment, but one that clearly stems from him being at a loss as to what he could get him for Christmas.
Mr. Hyunh has no shortage of sweaters.
We find Arnold and Gerald in the middle of a snowball fight. Arnold has told Gerald about his problem, but Gerald doesn’t see it as any big deal and tells him to just get Mr. Hyunh a tie. Arnold reminds him how he feels about gift giving, so Gerald makes the logical suggestion: go talk to him. Arnold brightens up immediately at the suggestion and doesn’t even seem to mind the snowball that smashes into his head. We cut to Arnold seated on Mr. Hyunh’s couch as a somewhat uncomfortable Mr. Hyunh sits across from him and asks Arnold what he wanted to ask him. The apartment seems rather sparse and has bananas on the wall paper, which I wonder if that was Mr. Hyunh’s doing or Arnold’s grandparents? Arnold says he just wanted to check-in with him, and at this point it must be obvious to Hyunh that Arnold is his secret Santa for why else would he be so inquisitive all of a sudden? They make some small talk where Arnold learns that Mr. Hyunh dislikes candy and has a whole bunch of sweaters. He has so many that even offers one to Arnold who declines and Mr. Hyunh almost looks hurt by the rejection.
Crushing.
Mr. Hyunh then reveals that this time of year is always hard for him as it causes him to think about his long lost daughter Mai. Arnold asks about her and we’re shown a flashback. Mr. Hyunh apparently hails from Vietnam, though the show never says this. He describes his former home as being a place torn apart by war. He had a baby daughter there, and when things were getting rough he was able to flee his home and is shown amongst a bunch of other citizens at what appears to be the US embassy trying to get to safety. The helicopter though is full, but Hyunh makes the hard decision to hold his small daughter up in the soldier’s face who accepts the child. As the helicopter takes off, he shouts out the name of the city where his daughter will be taken so that Hyunh can hopefully find her. Unfortunately, this all took place 20 years ago. Hyunh only somewhat recently was able to get out of Vietnam and to the US and he’s so far been unable to track down his daughter. It’s a heartbreaking story, and one that certainly has parallels to real world events. Relations between the US and Vietnam were rather frought for understandable reasons and they didn’t normalize until 1995 so it tracks that Mr. Hyunh would not have been able to arrive where he is until relatively recently. For the viewer, that real world connection is mostly irrelevant as the show gives enough information on its own to understand the situation Mr. Hyunh finds himself in and certainly enough to feel empathy for him, but it sure does underscore the pain for those who understand the inspiration here.
I can’t decide if Arnold’s optimism is infectious or frustrating.
Following that tale, Arnold is able to walk away from the encounter knowing what Mr. Hyunh wants for Christmas most. The only problem is, how does one go about finding a proverbial needle in a haystack? He must have shared this desire with Gerald, because we cut to the two of them walking through the streets with Gerald calling Arnold crazy. He even refers to Mr. Hyunh as the “monkey man guy” so apparently his unique wallpaper is well known. Arnold doesn’t think he’s crazy though and knows Mr. Hyunh is just a guy who wants to be reunited with his daughter and if there’s anything Arnold can do to help make that happen he’s going to try. Gerald then reminds him of the impossibility of the situation and we also find out that it’s already Christmas Eve! He tells Arnold that the only way he can hope to find Mai is via a miracle, but this doesn’t get Arnold down as he points out that Christmas is the most likely time of year for a miracle to occur. Touché, Arnold.
There’s a lot of Christmas Eve shopping going on today.
We then smash cut to Helga angrily digging through a bunch of toys in a department store. She’s still looking for a gift for Arnold and is frustrated by her lack of ideas. She wants something big and flashy. A train catches her fancy, but she dismisses it as too juvenile. She cries out “What would Arnold want for Christmas?” and we hard cut to Arnold saying “Here it is!” Only he isn’t eyeballing some shiny toy, but standing outside of a government building with Gerald. Arnold tells Gerald he called a bunch of government offices today and they all pointed him here, which is some office of records or something. He’s convinced that the information they need is in this building, they just need to find it.
Well they’re certainly having a good time.
The two enter and find it sparsely populated upfront. That’s because it’s Christmas Eve and there’s an office party taking place. There’s no visible alcohol, but it’s pretty clear that the attendees are enjoying some spirits as one is wearing a trash bucket on his head and laughing. Recognizing this as a lost cause, the two head further into the building and find one, middle-aged, man working on his own in a darkened room. He is Mr Bailey (Vincent Schiavelli), the department supervisor, and he’s a busy man who doesn’t want to be bothered. Arnold explains the situation to him, and Gerald chimes in as well, though the whole time Bailey doesn’t break his concentration and continues typing away. Once they’ve finished their pitch, Mr. Bailey tells them he’s touched by their story (which reads as sarcasm, on his part), but informs them that what they’re asking would take hours and resources he doesn’t have right now. He basically tells them to beat it, and even suggests checking out the party down the hall, and the two boys look defeated as they head for the door.
Mr. Bailey: the rough around the edges bureaucrat with a heart of gold.
As they walk out, Bailey gets a phone call. It’s his wife, and when he informs her that he hasn’t done the Christmas shopping yet Arnold perks up. They listen in on the phone call, and when he’s through Arnold has a proposition for Mr. Bailey: he’ll do his Christmas shopping for him in exchange for Bailey’s help in tracking down Mai. Bailey seems understandably reluctant to entrust his money (300 bucks) and shopping to two kids he’s never met, but concedes he really doesn’t have time to do the shopping so he agrees to Arnold’s proposal, but on one condition: Arnold has to get everything on the list by closing time, or no deal. Arnold happily agrees and he and Gerald take a wad of money and Bailey’s shopping list and set out to accomplish this fairly tall order. It’s Christmas Eve, and not particularly early in the day, so they have their work cut out for them. Unsurprisingly, Arnold is not dismayed at all, but quite the opposite. He’s certain they’ll fill the list and Mr. Bailey will find Mai and Mr. Hyunh will have a merry Christmas!
Look at this kid! You’re supposed to walk in the aisles, Stinky!
The first stop on the shopping spree is a store called Budnick’s. Is this a reference to another Nickelodeon show? Maybe, or maybe it’s a coincidence, but I’m going to go with “yes” because it makes me happy. Before we can get a glimpse at this list though, we first need to check-in with Helga. She’s contemplating a skateboard for Arnold and talking up the gift to herself to the point where it seems like she’s found the perfect gift. Then another kid pops up, Stinky (Christopher Walberg), to tell Helga that it is a great gift. How does he know? Because Arnold has one just like it! The kid’s a bit odd as he’s tall and gangly and actually steps over the display of skateboards to enthusiastically tell Helga all about it. A dismayed Helga returns the skateboard to the rack and slinks off, but hey, at least she didn’t get Arnold something he already had!
Mr. Bailey’s list, in case you were curious. I’m not seeing a typewriter.
We then get a glimpse of Arnold and Gerald shopping nearby. They’re grabbing some clothes off the rack, Arnold selects a watch, and they take all of their stuff to gift wrapping. Once done, we see them running back out onto the city streets where they head for another store: Tildales. Inside, they purchase what looks like a Walkman before running off to another store to get a typewriter (these bags they’re carrying just got a whole lot heavier). They race out of there and actually take a breather by sitting on a bench. There they can take stock of what they have left to buy and it turns out they’re down to one last item: Official Nancy Spumoni Snow boots. It’s clear judging by Arnold’s optimism that he has no idea how sought after these silly boots are, and if Gerald is aware, he has no immediate reaction.
Gerald is about to lay some reality on Helga.
We cut back to Helga who has, once again, found the perfect gift for her beloved Arnold. It’s some video game called The Frozen Tundra Death Warrior 7000! It doesn’t sound like the sort of thing Arnold would like, but what do I know? Helga disagrees as she thinks it’s flashy and something Arnold will be delighted to find underneath his Christmas tree. As she convinces herself of the gift’s majesty, she vocalizes her desires and wishes which include an admission of love for Arnold and the hope that this gift will inspire him to feel the same way about her as she does him. She even declares that this must be the truest meaning of Christmas. Worth noting, the price tag on this game is 100 bucks so Helga is really throwing some coin around to impress Arnold. As she clutches the game to her chest, she’s startled when she turns around to spy Arnold and Gerald on their mission for those fancy snow boots. She quickly hides the game behind her back. She addresses the pair in her usual bully fashion, referring to Arnold as football head and Gerald as tall hair boy (she’s very creative). She pokes fun at them for their last minute shopping, but when Arnold asks what she’s shopping for she’s happy to whip out the video game. She boasts how anyone receiving that for a gift would be really impressed, but Gerald takes a look at it and corrects her by noting it’s expensive and flashy, but not exactly personal. Apparently he really did take Arnold’s message to heart when it came to gift giving. Helga basically has a defeated look on her face as Gerald hands the game back with a “No offense,” that likely doesn’t help salve her wounds.
I’d call them jerks, but since they’re working retail at Christmas this is probably the only chance at laughter they’ve had since Thanksgiving.
Arnold reminds Gerald that they have to get going, but takes the time to wish Helga a, “Merry Christmas,” before departing. After he leaves, Helga fumes and slams the game into a shopping cart that just rolled up out of no where behind her. She then notices that Arnold dropped something. It’s the list that Mr. Bailey gave him and Helga picks it up and sees the Nancy Spumoni snow boots written on it and her face begins to glow. She then follows the pair as Arnold asks a clerk (Maurice LaMarche) if they have any of the boots in stock and the guy calls over his co-workers and makes Arnold ask again so they can all laugh at his expense. He tells Arnold how sought after they are and offers a waiting list that may pay dividends by the fourth of July, but that won’t work for Arnold. As Arnold leaves the store, Helga looks on with curiosity.
Helga should consider a career as a ninja.
A montage follows that shows Arnold and Gerald dashing to the subway and to various stores around the city. Each one just contains more clerks and more laughter from them when Arnold asks if they have any snow boots in stock. When the montage is over it’s nearly 6 o’clock and Gerald reminds him they need to get back for closing time. They’re just going to have to tell Mr. Bailey that there just aren’t any boots out there. Arnold, in a defeated voice, just voices disbelief that there isn’t one pair of the boots out there in the city. They return to Mr. Bailey lacking the snow boots, but not exactly empty-handed since they did get everything else on his exhaustive list. If you thought Mr. Bailey would be an understanding guy well then you’re as naive as Arnold. No snow boots, no deal, is what they get from Bailey who seems more angry than appreciative of what the boys did for him. Arnold and Gerald are forced to leave and they sulk on a bench outside. Helga is lurking behind a tree as she has apparently been following them this whole time. Arnold conveniently summarizes the plot of this episode for Helga to hear as she now knows that Arnold is after those boots just so some guy will help him locate a missing person. Arnold thanks Gerald for sticking with him through all of this and notes that he needed a miracle to pull this off, but just came up short. Gerald tries to cheer him up by letting him know that what he did is more than anyone would do to help someone and even tosses in a “That’s what Christmas is all about, Arnold.” Arnold is still pretty downtrodden by the whole thing, though he seems almost too tired to be truly sad or angry. As the two walk off, the camera lingers on Helga as she now knows the whole story.
The Pataki family having a good old time without their 9-year-old daughter who they apparently don’t keep track of.
At the Pataki house, Helga’s family is belting out their own drunken rendition of “Jingle Bells.” The thing with Helga’s mom (Kath Soucie) is she’s always shown drinking something in the show, usually coffee, but her mannerisms imply she’s basically drunk. And here, she seems to be drinking eggnog. Actually, it’s quickly confirmed to be eggnog. Basically, she’s an alcoholic, but the show must not have been allowed to spell it out so plainly so they have to tiptoe around it. Her father, Bob (LaMarche), is just a boisterous asshole who pays no attention to Helga and both parents are far more invested in Helga’s older sister, Olga, who they view as the golden child. Helga comes into the house with her shoulders slumped as she heads into the living room and collapses on the couch. Her mom comes over and asks where she’s been all day and Helga replies curtly, “Out, Miriam.” She always addresses her parents by name as she seems to think they aren’t worthy of being called mom and dad. Miriam does note that her daughter looks depressed, but doesn’t actually ask her anything or attempt to investigate why. Instead, she just hands over a Christmas present. Helga opens the box and finds one of the things she had been longing for: Official Nancy Spumoni Signature Snow Boots! She immediately brightens up while her mom tries to tell her how long she had to wait in line just to get them.
I could have gone with a sad Helga picture, but let’s have a look at happy Helga since she doesn’t experience much pure joy in this episode.
After giving her mom a quick hug, Helga throws them on and races outside to bask in the afterglow of the perfect Christmas present. As she spins her way through the snowy streets, a realization hits her. Arnold’s list has fallen out of her pocket and is staring up at her. Her shoulders immediately slump once more as she regards it as she whines out loud, “Not another moral dilemma!” She then goes over her emotions, how she’s happy because she got what she wanted which typically would be enough for her; more than enough, really! Then she notes how Arnold is not happy because he won’t be getting what he wanted this Christmas, which involves these silly snow boots. She finally knows what it will take to get Arnold the perfect Christmas present, the other thing she’s been longing for. It also means giving up what she refers to as really boss snow boots, which will end up with her getting nothing. One could interpret this scene as the show talking down to its audience by so explicitly laying out the stakes for Helga and Arnold, but I think it’s a worthwhile exercise so we stop and think about how this is all going through Helga’s head in the moment. She was on the wrong end of Christmas at the episode’s start, so in order for her to undertake the selfless act we all know is coming, we really need to see her internal dilemma before us so that it’s believable. And the fact that the scene ends with Helga once more slumping her shoulders and then dropping to her knees really helps to sell it. She’s arriving at the right conclusion, but she’s not happy about it, and she even admits out loud that she’s going to end up with nothing. No boss snow boots. No affection from Arnold. Nothing.
Honestly, if I’m in Bailey’s shoes I’m not sure I care about some random kid’s belief in miracles.
In Arnold’s room, we find the little guy laying in bed just staring at the ceiling. He imagines what it must have been like for Mr. Hyunh to watch his daughter fly out of his life as he just lays there. We then cut to the government building and Mr. Bailey is shown locking up. Helga comes running up and tosses the wrapped snow boots into his arms and orders him to get back in there because they have a missing person to find! If you thought Bailey would be delighted to get the sought after boots he needed, well you were once again mistaken. He tells Helga to go home and hands her back the box. It’s Christmas Eve and he wants to get out of there. Helga tries pleading with him, but he just keeps heading for his cab and reiterates to her that he just wants to go home. Helga then makes one final plea, “For pity’s sake, are you really that cold? Look in your heart. We’ve got a choice here, either you and I work all night to find a certain lost daughter, or you can leave now. But if you leave now, that little football-headed kid will never believe in miracles again.” Mr. Bailey says nothing, but he turns away from his cab and he has a frozen, almost emotionless, look on his face as the scene fades to black.
That’s not the usual, optimistic, Arnold we’re used to.
The next morning, Gerald shows up at the apartment house to wish Arnold a merry Christmas. Arnold still looks defeated as he’s seated in a chair while others seem to be basking in the merriment of the holiday. He returns Gerald’s gesture, but has the look of someone who didn’t sleep a wink last night. Across the room, the gift exchange is underway and Oskar opens his gift to find a bag of coal. He asks who could do such a thing, and Ernie (Dom Irrera) smiles and in an unconvincing manner states “Wasn’t me!” Grandpa Phil then announces that’s the last of the presents, but Ernie points out that Mr. Hyunh didn’t get one. Arnold’s shoulders slump further as his grandfather looks under the tree to make sure he didn’t miss any. Mr. Hyunh states it’s okay and he doesn’t need a present and would seem to prefer just staring into the fireplace. Arnold then drags himself off of his chair to go talk to him, but is interrupted by the doorbell. As Grandpa Phil angrily goes to see who would bother them on Christmas, Arnold seems to just stare at Mr. Hyunh who isn’t looking in his direction. Gerald comes to stand beside his friend as I’m assuming he expects Arnold to tell Mr. Hyunh what they attempted to do the prior day, but Arnold just can’t seem to bring himself to do so.
I don’t think the next few images require captions…
Without saying anything, Grandpa Phil comes back into the room with a big grin on his face and brings a young woman into the room with him. She’s smiling and is clearly of asian descent, but she just continues to smile in the direction of Mr. Hyunh and waits for him him to turn around. A whisper of “Mai” can be heard and I think the implication is that it’s Mr. Hyunh’s daughter’s name echoing in his head, as it did early in the episode when was climbing the stoop, but it also seems to get him to turn around. She continues to smile at him while Mr. Hyunh just looks on with a stunned expression on his face. The moment is allowed to linger for a beat, before Mai finally breaks the silence by asking “Father?” He returns her question with “Mai?” and the two quickly embrace as Mr. Hyunh declares “I can’t believe it!” Arnold looks on with shock while the others mostly smile. Ernie can be seen quietly crying in the background. Mr. Hyunh then introduces Mai as his daughter to everyone. Arnold offers up a “Merry Christmas, Mr. Hyunh,” while Phil attempts to put a bow on the whole thing by declaring that Mr. Hyunh got his present after all.
Arnold then confesses to Gerald that he basically can’t believe this happened and questions how it could have? Gerald just matter-of-factly declares it a miracle, the one Arnold had been counting on, and there’s really no explaining a miracle. He then suggests that maybe Arnold has a Christmas angel looking out for him, and Arnold almost seems receptive to the idea. We’re then shown through the window that Helga is standing in the street looking on. She’s in her socks too, so she apparently did end up surrendering those boots to Mr. Bailey, as expected. She looks happy though and nearly overcome with emotion as she whispers softly to herself, “Merry Christmas, Arnold.”
A sweet ending for a sweet story. It’s obvious that Mr. Bailey and Helga returned to his office after their encounter outside and were able to find Mai and somehow connect with her to orchestrate this meet-up. If she was escorted to Arnold’s house by Helga or not is unclear. What is a touch confusing about the final scene is we see Gerald arrives and it’s clearly daylight, probably late Christmas morning. When we cut to Helga the sun is much lower and it’s approaching dusk. I’m going to chalk it up to an artistic choice that the director just felt it would look better for Helga to be standing outside on a darkened street than a busy one in broad daylight, because hours definitely did not pass between when Gerald arrived and when we pan to Helga. No matter, as the impact of the moment is still felt. Mr. Hyunh’s reunion with his daughter is sweet and tear-jerking, and Helga’s almost silent offering to Arnold is just as tender. There’s a touch of sadness as well since Helga gave up a lot to orchestrate this, and not just snow boots, but her own Christmas with her family even if her home life isn’t ideal. She also likely will get in a lot of trouble for giving those boots away, but we also know she won’t tell anyone what happened to them. She’ll probably tell her mom they were stupid and she sold them. Or her mom won’t even notice, because they usually don’t pay much attention to her. And Arnold is likely never to know what Helga did for him this Christmas which adds a touch of tragedy to the scene, but in looking at Helga’s expression, it would appear she did not end up with nothing after all.
Ok, I’ll caption this one because I think it’s so cute that Ernie is moved to tears.
The story told through Mr. Hyunh is probably still the main takeaway. Even if Arnold and Helga are at the center of the show, it’s hard to argue that Hyunh’s story didn’t steal the episode. It’s pretty crushing, and frankly impossible, for me as a father to put myself in his shoes and the shoes of many real life people who had to make that terrible choice to give up their child in the hope that it would provide them a better life. Knowing there are many real life Mr. Hyunh’s out there who probably never found their child in the end is equally heartbreaking and for a show like Hey Arnold! to shine a light on the refugees of Vietnam is a noble cause. This isn’t something I ever saw touched upon by another show in this demographic and it’s that aspect of it that has really helped it to endure over the years since its premiere.
It’s a sweet image, but I have to point out that Helga was wearing her normal shoes when she confronted Mr. Bailey and probably should be wearing them, but the socks drive home that she did in fact swap her boots for his help.
One watch of this episode and it’s easy to see why so many people adore it and why it is worthy of being considered among the best. Am I ready to reorder my list from a few years back to include it? No, but if I should return to that list I’ll certainly consider it. As a Christmas special, it is a bit formulaic and predictable. On the surface, a bratty kid learning the true of meaning of Christmas via a selfless act is pretty by the numbers, but the show found a new and captivating way to approach it. It’s also handled expertly and I love how several scenes are allowed to just linger and breath for maximum effect. The reunion of father and daughter is a clear example of that, as is all of the monologuing conducted by Helga throughout to really illustrate what she’s thinking as her emotions are a bit more complex than they appear to be on the surface. I also really liked the score utilized throughout and felt the show did a great job of not spreading itself too thin. Hey Arnold! is a show with a vast assortment of supporting characters that the episode really could have been bogged down by, but the writers involved knew we didn’t need to see how every kid in Arnold’s class is spending Christmas this year and the episode benefits from that.
Merry Christmas, Helga.
If you would like to catch this episode of Hey Arnold! this holiday season then I would say you’re in luck as it’s a pretty available show. It’s presently streaming on both Paramount+ and Hulu and there’s always the possibility one of the Nickelodeon channels airs it this month. It’s also available to rent digitally if you don’t have a subscription to either service or cable and it’s been made available on DVD. If you’re like me and have a pretty substantial collection of physical media due to a love of Christmas specials, then this one is definitely worth owning.
Can’t wait until tomorrow for more Christmas? Check out what we had to say on this day last year and beyond:
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I’ve been known to be a bit critical of Warner Bros. for not creating more Christmas shorts. The most notable one is Gift Wrapped starring Tweety while Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck basically had to wait until after the Golden Era to give Christmas a whirl. And those weren’t really that great. Low key, the best Christmas anything featuring a Looney Tunes character might be the episode of Taz-Mania. Tweety’s old short is fine, and we’ve seen some decent Christmas episodes of The Sylvester and Tweety Mysteries, but it is a shame that we don’t have a great Bugs Bunny Christmas.
Could this episode of a forgotten series more than 10 years old be the Bugs Bunny Christmas special I’ve always wanted?!
Maybe that is about to change. In the 2010’s, Warner Bros. was interested in reviving the Looney Tunes brand. There were some new shorts made for television, but they didn’t make a tremendous impact. Something different was seemingly required which is what lead the company down the path of creating a sitcom featuring the Looney Tunes characters. Conceived by Sam Register, Spike Brandt, and Tony Cervone, The Looney Tunes Show was the result of that premise and it premiered on Cartoon Network in 2011 and ran for two seasons. The show was an animated sitcom starring Bugs Bunny (Jeff Bergman), Daffy Duck (Bergman), Lola Bunny (Kristen Wiig), Porky (Ben Bergen), and all the rest. In it, Bugs was a pretty well-off rabbit as the result of some carrot peeling invention he cooked up. He lives with his best friend, Daffy Duck, who is basically a mooch. He’s very much the Daffy of the Chuck Jones era in both appearance and personality, though his antagonism towards Bugs is dialed down since the two do consider each other friends. Lola is Bugs’ romantic interest, though it’s more of a one-sided deal as she’s basically obsessed with the rabbit who is a bit put off by her manic personality. Bugs is somewhat oddly cast as the straight man in the show, though I suppose this isn’t all that different from how Tiny Toons used him. Other stars from the Golden Era are featured and most have a suburban type job. The only one that’s really odd is the Tasmanian Devil who is now a pet of Bugs. Yeah, you read that right.
A sitcom starring the Looney Tunes. I’ve heard worse ideas.
The concept of using these characters in a sitcom has some appeal, but it definitely needs to be a high energy sitcom. There should be more physical comedy present than say The Simpsons if these characters are going to be utilized, otherwise what’s the point? A show should be judged on its own merits, but if there isn’t going to be a “looney” component to the show then it’s just trying to coast on the reputation of the characters rather than utilize them as best as can be. I say that all going in, but I don’t know if those things are present or not. I have no memory of this show and it’s likely because I really wasn’t paying attention to what Cartoon Network was doing at the time. Somehow I’d catch wind of them prepping a new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles show for 2012, but apparently I missed this one. I’m guessing I must have heard about the Looney Tunes being turned into a sitcom and probably had a negative reaction to such news, but obviously I don’t remember. It didn’t set the world on fire or else it likely would have been around longer than it was, but I’m guessing it also wasn’t a total trainwreck since it did earn a second season and no one was ranting about how bad it was. We were early in the smart phone age and I’m guessing if the show had launched just a couple of years later it would have made more noise, for better or worse.
The subject of today’s post is the second season episode “A Christmas Carol.” Before you get too worked up, no, this one isn’t a direct adaptation of that venerable story. Rather, the timeless classic is just part of the subject as Lola Bunny wants to stage a performance of the play at the local theater. That doesn’t excuse the lazy title, but this is not Bah, Humduck!, a special I kind of want to look at some day, but also don’t if that makes sense.
Well there’s an idyllic, Christmas setting, though it does kind of look like a toilet bowl.
The episode begins with a narrator ushering in the Christmas season. We’re getting a bird’s eye view of wherever it is this show takes place and the local scenery is covered in snow and decorated for Christmas. Then the deadpan delivery of the narrator notes it’s 104 degrees out and doesn’t much feel like Christmas. All of the snow vanishes and so do the decorations before we head into the home of Bugs Bunny. Bugs Bunny is in his home reading a newspaper in which the heat wave is front page material. I might as well talk about the look of the show now. Bugs looks like Bugs, but he’s been restyled and simplified. There’s more straight lines and his head is a different shape from the classic versions we know and love. His nose is far more prominent and honestly if it wasn’t for that I’d probably like the look well enough. Instead, it just makes me miss the old Bugs. The rest of the cast appears far less stylized to me with some being really no different than what Warner was using as stock art in the 90s (which all seemed to be heavily influenced by the Chuck Jones aesthetic – that’s what happens when you outlive nearly all of your peers). Some characters, like the suddenly rich Foghorn Leghorn, had room for more of a redesign, but as we’ll see in a bit, he’s still a big, naked, rooster.
Meet Lola. She’s basically nothing like the Lola you know from Space Jam.
Bugs is interrupted by a ring of the doorbell and we can see that it’s Lola on the other side. When he opens the door he finds the female rabbit covered head-to-toe in Christmas fashion, the kind of fashion one might wear if it was -2 outside, not 102. Lola inquires if Bugs is excited for the coming holiday, but when he notes how the weather is sapping his Christmas spirit, Lola acts like she’s going to faint. Bugs reminds her that she’s wearing a parka and that’s more likely the cause of her sudden dizzy spell. Lola rather matter-of-factly acknowledges this detail and simply removes the heavy garment including the mittens she was wearing over her usual gloves, an interesting choice. She stands for a moment with a frozen expression on her face that’s mildly unsettling before asking Bugs what they were talking about. I’m sensing a bit of Ralph Wiggum in Lola, which is not something I was expecting. When he reminds her the subject was his lack of Christmas spirit, she finally faints. Bugs mugs for the camera for a second before the opening credits begin.
This is low key a wonderfully staged shot of a couple just lounging around casually.
The opening title is rather brief and features a remixed, and very brassy, rendition of the classic theme and provides for quick glimpses of the redesigned characters. When the episode returns, Elmer Fudd (Billy West) is on the telly giving a news report on the heat wave. In this world, he’s apparently a news anchorman and basically looks like the Elmer of old. We see a shot of the town from last Christmas when there was snow on the ground juxtaposed with this year where Yosemite Sam (Maurice LaMarche) can’t sell a tree because no one has any Christmas spirit. One catches fire during the broadcast due to the dry conditions which leads to Sam suffering what are likely horrible injuries. Bugs is laying on the couch and Lola is casually laying on him still bemoaning the lack of Christmas spirit in the town. She jumps up and decides she won’t stand for it as she puts her heavy parka back on along with her knit hat which has bells dangling from it that chime every time she moves her head. She thinks a play will help put everyone back in the Christmas spirit and Bugs asks if she’s going to do A Christmas Carol? Lola has no idea what that is and confesses she was going to do Cats. Bugs has to hand her a copy of the book and she thanks him by calling him “Bun Bun” which is kind of adorable. After she leaves she only makes it to the stoop before expressing, “Damn, it’s hot,” and passes out again.
Nice, they’ve got purple stuff!
Bugs then heads into the kitchen looking rather hot himself. In there he finds Daffy rummaging through the fridge and pulling out a bunch of stuff. When Daffy tells him he’s making room for something, Bugs snaps back it better not be for a turkey because he’s not cooking one of those this year on account of the heat. Daffy corrects him by saying he’s making room for a duck as he intends to climb into the fridge and out of the heat. Bugs tells him he’ll suffocate and yanks him away from the fridge. Daffy retorts that suffocation is the most pleasant way to go and Bugs doesn’t appear interested in arguing. He grabs a can of something Daffy had pulled out of the fridge and starts rubbing it on his forehead as he heads back into the living room leaving Daffy to ponder if he got it wrong and suffocation is the worst way to go? He decides he should probably do some research before crawling into the freezer. Bergman’s Daffy for this show is far more subdued than usual. It’s actually a little bizarre to hear such a low key Daffy Duck.
Foghorn Leghorn is very rich and also very serious about Christmas.
Daffy joins his friend in the living room and Bugs remarks that Daffy’s buddy is on the television. That buddy is Foghorn Leghorn (Bergman) who is apparently a billionaire. He’s giving a press conference titled Operation Save Christmas to a group of reporters. Interestingly, everyone else in the room is a human except Foghorn. He shares his plan to restore the Christmas spirit in town by traveling to the North Pole to install a giant fan that will blow cool air down to them. Upon hearing this ridiculous plan, Bugs remarks he’s surprised that Daffy isn’t going with him which just causes Daffy to confirm “I am!” A beep from a car outside is apparently the ride north as Daffy gets up and heads out. Upon encountering Lola still passed out on the stoop he calls back to Bugs that his girlfriend fainted again. He then hops into a stretch limo and heads off. At least this will get him out of the heat.
Lola demonstrating her range as an actress for the group while the animators demonstrate their desire to have relations with a cartoon rabbit.
The next scene begins with a shot of a marquee for Lola’s A Christmas Carol. Below that it is prominently advertised that the theater is air-conditioned. Inside, Lola is handing out scripts to those who are to participate in her play. There’s Sam, the Goofy Gophers Tosh (Jess Harnell) and Mac (Rob Paulsen), Speedy Gonzalez (Fred Armisen), Porky Pig, and Bugs. All of them are said to be there for some noble reason (per Lola), except for Bugs, who she needed to drive her there because her nail polish wasn’t dry yet. Sam also informs her, delicately, that he’s also there for the money, but when Lola has no reaction to this he just sheepishly suggests he is indeed there due to his love of the theater. I very much doubt that Lola is paying any of them. Lola then starts handing out the scripts and notes she’s made some adjustments. When she tells Bugs he’s playing Santa Claus, the cast finds out she didn’t make adjustments, she re-wrote the whole thing. Bugs rhetorically asks if she rewrote a beloved classic and Lola shares her opinion that a play about some greedy old man isn’t going to restore the spirit of Christmas. Sam is to play nightclub owner Rick Evans while the gophers will play elves (and they politely disagree on who will play which elf, much to the annoyance of Sam), while Speedy is playing Manu Ginóbili who Speedy points out is a basketball player. That one definitely dates this production. Porky is dismayed to find out he’s playing a pet pig named Hambone who has no lines, probably a good idea for a stuttering pig. Lola then remarks how they don’t have anyone to play Carol, the title character of her play. When it’s suggested that she play Carol, she displays an abundance of false modesty as she describes the role and all of the complexities that go into it while displaying her ability to capture them all. Bugs looks on with boredom like he’s seen this routine out of Lola before while the rest just seem perplexed, or in the case of the gophers, indifferent as they’re still trying to settle on which elf they’ll play. I’m curious if they’re brothers or if this show is allowing them to be the gay couple we always assumed they were?
Oh Daffy, you think you’re cold now…
We then head to the skies as the narrator sets the tone for Daffy and Foghorn’s mission up north. They’re in a large plane and preparing to parachute down to the North Pole which makes sense as there aren’t any airports way up there. Daffy does not seem thrilled to find out they’re jumping, but Foghorn Leghorn isn’t bothered one bit. He sends the giant crate containing the enormous fan out first, then helps give Daffy a nudge out the cargo door. Both scream as they fall to Earth and it looks like Daffy has a camera mounted on top of his helmet. Foghorn’s screams are also those of excitement as he doesn’t seem too scared about the freefall.
Porky is apparently down for doing nude scenes for unpaid community theater performances.
We’ll have to wait until the next scene to see if anyone accidentally grabbed a backpack containing utensils instead of a parachute as we’re taken back to the theater. The gang is in costume now and Sam can be heard remarking that he read the script and it isn’t worth the air conditioning. Lola comes strutting over wearing an elaborate, Victorian era gown and calls for their attention. She has to whistle to get it and then tries to boost everyone’s morale by telling them they need to perform this unrecognizable version of A Christmas Carol flawlessly if they want to save the town. No one seems moved as rehearsals begin with Porky disrobing and turning his red bowtie around before laying on a rug. Lola, as Carol, takes a seat in a large chair by a fireplace and says her line which Porky oinks in acknowledgement upon its completion. Lola then looks at him with disapproval and passive-aggressively asks “Is that how you’re going to do it?” Porky just smiles sheepishly and adds a second “oink” and Lola just tells him they’re going to have to work on that. Are we supposed to like Lola? So far, this episode has depicted her as a passive-aggressive, uncultured, moronic, scatterbrain who is also very self-absorbed and has a high opinion of herself. She’s also the only female so far and it kind of sucks that the lone woman is pretty terrible. This isn’t going very well.
For the second time already in this episode, Daffy is contemplating suicide.
At the North Pole, the parachuting apparently went fine as both Daffy and Foghorn are walking through the snow. Foghorn is pulling the massive container for the fan while Daffy is just marching behind looking rather worse for ware. He then stops and announces his sense of adventure has been usurped by his tiredness and out-of-shapedness (sic) before collapsing. Foghorn Leghorn stops to reprimand him pointing out he’ll freeze to death which Daffy remarks “It’s the most pleasant way to go, according to my research.” That must be how Daffy passed the time during the flight. Foghorn just grumbles about the situation and everyone’s give up attitude which in the process should serve more as a demotivational technique since it includes the factoid that they have to pull a six-thousand pound fan another seventy miles before they’re through. Despite that, Daffy ends up popping up with a smile on his beak and starts pushing the crate from behind while Foghorn pulls from the front. That’s definitely not the Daffy I know. Maybe the hypothermia is making him delirious and extra-agreeable, because there was really no reason for him to suddenly jump up and resume their journey. Unless this is one of those show’s going hard into “random” humor as Daffy’s change of heart was certainly random, though the narrator attributes it to “the Christmas spirit.” Even the Grinch at least needed to hear a song.
Bugs seems to have utter contempt for his girlfriend. He’s not as bad as Al Bundy, but he only had to do this for two seasons.
Back at rehearsals, Tosh and Mac are shown in their adorable elf costumes as they answer Carol’s door. Carol is surprised to find Santa’s helpers at her door, but they’re there to deliver an important message: Santa is missing, and they need Carol to take his place! When she asks, “Why me?” the gophers drop a bombshell: she’s Santa’s daughter! Carol is pretty much floored by this news and as she builds up to an important declaration she’s forced to call out “Line?” when she’s supposed to announce her intentions to go with the elves. Bugs, still sporting his annoyed face, tells her the line “I have to go with you to the North Pole.” Lola responds with “Right,” then says “I have to go with you to…line?” Bugs clues her in, but when she goes to deliver the line she can only get out “The North…” and Bugs just finishes it for her. Lola points out she didn’t ask for a line and plays it off like she knows her lines. Bugs does not look amused while Speedy, in his basketball attire, just sits beside him with a look of wonder on his little face. We then end the scene with Lola once again calling for her line. This show really wants us to hate her.
Hey, someone gets to be happy int his thing!
At the North Pole, our two heroes are still dragging that crate through the snow until Foghorn announces they made it! The two start celebrating by dancing and yelling until Daffy remarks “I always knew we’d make it! Except for that one time I laid down in the snow to die, but all the rest of the time I knew we’d make it! Well, not that one time when I tried to kill you so that I could climb inside your carcass for warmth, but then realized how hard it would be to clean out your carcass so then I just laid a second time in the snow to die! But every other time I always knew we would make it!” This confession from Daffy is the first time I’ve audibly chuckled at this episode as he delivers it rather cheerfully and with a matter-of-fact manner while Foghorn Leghorn looks on with some distress. When he finishes, there’s a slight pause like Foghorn is still processing what Daffy said, but then the two just resume their celebration. More of this, please!
Happiness is fleeting.
We then jump ahead and find Foghorn putting the finishing touches on the giant fan’s assembly. Unfortunately, now that the fan is ready there’s just one problem: where to plug it in? Daffy is pretty incredulous at the realization that he followed his friend up to the North Pole on this ridiculous expedition when Foghorn Leghorn didn’t even come up with a way to power his massive fan. While Daffy essentially freaks out, Foghorn just keeps repeating, “W. W. S. D.” over and over while looking thoughtful. Daffy finally bites and Foghorn confirms that he’s wondering “What would Santa do?” Apparently, he always asks himself that question when he needs guidance making Foghorn Leghorn some sort of Santa worshipper. He then has a eureka moment and declares they’ll just plug the fan in at Santa’s workshop! Daffy is not thrilled with this suggestion and when he points out how Foghorn intends to just wander around a frozen wasteland in search of Santa’s workshop the rooster just asks “What could possibly go wrong?” We smash cut to Daffy covered in ice and snow his teeth chattering together as a result of the cold. Foghorn Leghorn doesn’t look any better as the two march through the snow in search of the workshop.
Santa shows up out of no where and that’s how the play ends. I’m guessing something similar happens here too.
At the theater, Lola is setting the mood for the next scene which is Carol and the elves confronting Sam’s Rick Evans character over the disappearance of Santa while Speedy dribbles a basketball in the background. As the scene begins, Carol marches into the nightclub and asks if Evans kidnapped Santa. He denies any involvement and that’s apparently good enough for Carol. She flubs another line and Bugs provides the correct one. Lola notices he doesn’t have a script and asks “Bugs, did you memorize the entire script?” to which Bugs responds, “Unfortunately.” It’s time for Santa to make his grand entrance and Bugs is lowered from the ceiling in a sleigh. When Carol asks where he’s been, Bugs gives a wooden performance as Santa and suggests he lost track of time then remarks that he knows what he needs for Christmas: a watch. Carol laughs at the remark and playfully says “Oh, Santa!” She then gasps, and wrapping her arms around Santa says, “I mean, Dad.”
Lola then enthusiastically shouts “The end!” and throws up her hands triumphantly! Lola expresses her enthusiasm for the play as she walks off stage leaving Porky, Bugs, and the gophers alone on stage. Bugs tugs off his Santa hat looking somewhat exhausted while the others come closer. Tosh then carefully asks “Is it just me, or is this play bad? Like, really, really bad?” When he finishes his line a basketball comes rolling by them as a means of punctuating how terrible this play is.
What Daffy thinks happened at the North Pole.
We return to the North Pole where Daffy seems to think their journey has reached its end. A cave up ahead could be Santa’s workshop, but Foghorn Leghorn tells the duck he has hypothermia and is hallucinating as he digs through his backpack for a first aid kit. Daffy refuses the suggestion and grabs the plug and heads for the cave. Inside, he finds a warmly lit, festive, room that must belong to Santa! His suspicions are soon confirmed when a voice calls out to him. He turns and sees the fat man himself, Santa (Barry Corbin), who beckons him to come sit on his lap by the fire. In doing so, we also find out that Santa has been the one narrating this episode. Daffy then sets his helmet down and does as suggested remarking how Santa is so snuggly. He delightfully sips on some hot chocolate provided by an elf and the scene dissolves to another back at the press conference room.
And here we see what really happened at the North Pole. It’s not explained how Daffy survived this encounter unscathed.
Foghorn Leghorn has just finished recounting their journey and a reporter confirms that the two went up to the North Pole and plugged in a giant fan that will bring cool air to their town. Foghorn Leghorn just says “Yup,” to the worn out looking reporter and Daffy takes it from there. He tells the audience they had a little help from the big man and tells them it’s all on film. He picks up the helmet he had been wearing with the camera on it and plugs it into the monitor positioned behind the podium, only the video he plays does not feature Santa. We see Daffy entering a cave inhabited by a massive polar bear and its two cubs. Daffy sits on the polar bear’s lap and embraces it as he did Santa before. Foghorn Leghorn looks on with a smile and tells him he told him he was hallucinating. Daffy then has the realization that he must not have actually plugged the fan in and Foghorn confirms as much, but then says next time he’ll make it battery operated. Daffy can only stand there with a horrid expression on his face as he asks, “Next time?” I have to feel for the writers and staff at this point if any of them saw the Sponge-Bob Christmas special that aired less than two weeks before this one which featured the exact same bit with the Santa hallucination into a polar bear.
Well, Elmer sure seems to be enjoying it. That other dude who’s smiling is definitely high.
It’s opening night of Lola’s play and it looks like the turnout is going to be pretty robust. Lola is excited, naturally, and gives her cast a little pep talk before the play begins. As she welcomes them all in for a group hug, they unfortunately do so on the trapdoor Lola just installed and they all fall below the stage. Lola, ever cheerful, explains how the trapdoor will make their entrances and exits that much more dramatic. Porky is concerned that they’re trapped now and will suffocate causing Tosh to continue the runner for this episode of saying “Oh, I’ve heard that’s the most pleasant way to go.” Lola says she’s heard the same, but then tells them they’ll be fine since Bugs can get them out. As they all shout for Bugs, he comes walking onto the stage asking where they are? When he finds out they’re behind a trapdoor, Lola relays the unfortunate piece of information that she may have neglected the “door” functions of the device over the trap. It makes no sense since we saw the thing swing open to welcome them all inside, but whatever. Lola declares they’ll have to cancel the play forcing Bugs to remark “But you worked so hard on it.” Our narrator returns to inform us that this is the moment that Bugs realized the true meaning of Christmas. The play then begins with Bugs in the role of Carol seated in the large chair talking to her pet pig. When it’s Hambone’s turn to oink, Bugs slides out of the dress and to the floor to play the part of the pig as well while the audience looks on with confusion. Remember, they’re all there for A Christmas Carol, after all, so it’s not even the rabbit playing two roles that’s truly confusing them here.
And the trapdoor claims another victim.
Outside the theater, Foghorn and Daffy come upon the play. Foghorn is pretty enthused to see a production of A Christmas Carol in town and informs Daffy that this is the best way to get the Christmas spirit. Daffy just responds that he’s never heard of it. The pair enter and we find Bugs playing the part of Manu Ginóbili and dribbling a basketball on stage. He then vanishes and reappears as Carol calling out for Santa before turning into the Rick Evans character and then back to Carol. After delivering the line about wondering where Santa could be if Evans didn’t kidnap him, the trapdoor springs open and sucks Bugs in. He lands on everyone else and Lola points out he wasn’t supposed to use the trapdoor. Speedy wonders what they’ll do now since they don’t have an ending, but it appears someone is going to bail them out.
All right, he didn’t exactly come out of no where since Daffy and Foghorn did journey to the North Pole, but it’s close.
The audience looks on with stunned expressions on their faces before the theater doors burst open and in comes Santa Claus! He soars in on his sleigh pulled by eight, pretty small, reindeer and lands on the stage. He then addresses the crowd, “I know what you’re all thinking, this is the worst Christmas play ever, and I can’t say I disagree. But it took a lot of effort to put on a play this bad, and if there’s one thing that’s worth the effort, it’s Christmas.” As he says this, the camera lingers on Lola and Bugs in the trapdoor looking up at the stage both dressed as Carol. Lola cups her hands together with a contented expression on her face at Santa’s declaration and the jolly, old, elf continues, “Look, I know it’s a lot of work tying the tree to the roof of your car and then dragging it inside – pine needles going everywhere! Packing up the car and driving six hours to grandma’s house, but these are the things that bring us all together. Even this utterly unrecognizable version of A Christmas Carol. I mean, look around you! The whole town is here! Yes, I know that Christmas isn’t easy, but nothing worth doing ever is.” As he says that part, Foghorn Leghorn gives Daffy a nudge who had been looking on with rapt attention.
I bet Santa kind of enjoys sitting on others for a change.
Santa then finishes, “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got to deliver presents to every boy and girl on Earth! You think that doesn’t take a lot of effort? Ho! Ho! Ho! Merry Christmas, everyone!” As Santa picks up his sack and goes to get back in his sleigh, the trapdoor claims another victim and he falls inside to land on top of the others. The audience rises and gives Santa a standing ovation and we see Santa laying on everyone at the bottom of the trap. He looks to Lola and remarks, “Nice trap door.” He then turns to his sack and pulls out some gifts and starts handing them out. He addresses the Goofy Gophers as just “Gophers,” and tells them to sort out who gets what. Sam is told “Better luck next year,” as the scene fades out with Santa handing out more gifts.
Oh yeah, we’re getting in a moon shot!
The crowd is then shown dispersing and Daffy and Foghorn Leghorn are shocked to find it’s snowing outside! As they look around, a jolly greeting from the sky prompts them to look up. It’s Santa, who tells the two he plugged their fan in for them. As he belts out his signature laugh one more time, we get a delightful Santa moon shot! Bugs then walks into frame sporting a festive scarf and starts singing. It’s an original song and this musical outro is basically a chance to see the rest of the regular cast if only for a moment. It’s also an opportunity to get in some more slapstick styled humor like Daffy freezing his ass to a bench and Lola throwing up in a sack. We get to see Elmer in his underwear afflicted with seasonal depression and also get a look at Daffy’s girlfriend in the show, an original creation named Tina (Annie Mumolo). Taz is briefly shown and it’s weird to see him seated on all fours as the pet of Bugs and Gossamer is also featured and he’s apparently voiced by a kid (Kwesi Boakye) which is a bit jarring. There’s a fun bit where Daffy mentions a Christmas wraith and when Bugs asks if he meant “wreath” he says no and gestures to a horrifying wraith flying through the sky on an undead dragon.
This is apparently who Daffy worships in place of Santa.
The whole sequence ends with the gang atop a bus designated the Karaoke Bus driven by Foghorn Leghorn. It’s covered in lights and there’s a Rudolph head for a hood ornament. The song ends with the bus apparently driving out of town and we cut to credits. I definitely didn’t ticket this as the sort of holiday special that would end with a song, but it did. And it wasn’t bad and probably featured some of the funnier moments in the whole thing. Unfortunately, it also serves as a reminder of what most people like about Looney Tunes thus shining a light on the fact that this show doesn’t have much of that in it.
Things that do work for me are Bugs and Lola. They have a fun dynamic where Lola is just an exhausting sort of girlfriend and Bugs is kind of just going with it. I enjoyed Wiig’s performance as Lola and she was an easy character to poke fun at as she’s also made of Teflon apparently and nothing phases her. She’s still unlikable, so it’s impossible to actually care about her play getting cancelled. Bugs works for me as a foil to that, but it is a bit of a bummer to see him so neutered. He carries himself as if he’s above everything that’s going on around him, but without his usual cleverness. He’s just resigned to this position and such a passive attitude from him is so out of character. Daffy is also similarly neutered with his anger basically cut out from his personality. It’s understandable that he’d be toned down to fit into this setting, but it was hard to feel like I’m watching a Daffy Duck performance. About the only characters seemingly unaffected were Foghorn Leghorn, who despite being fabulously wealthy now, is still mostly the same though also reeled in a bit. Porky is also very much still Chuck Jones era Porky where he was often Daffy’s sidekick. He’s meek and just sort of there which honestly feels like the right place for him.
Taz as a pet probably takes some getting used to.
Everyone else is mostly underserved, but I can’t critique the show for not having enough time to flesh out the cast in one episode in the middle of the second season. As such, I don’t feel like I can really comment on Speedy, who is present for much of this one, but has no actual presence. Yosemite Sam is sort of hinted at, but this episode doesn’t do anything to illustrate why he’s on the dreaded Naughty List. I don’t know if he behaves more villainous in other episodes, or if we’re supposed to just know him as classic era Sam who would absolutely be on said list.
Similar to how I can’t judge the characters too much based on one episode, I can’t really judge the performance of the voice cast either. They’re asked to be so toned down compared with how these characters are normally portrayed that I have to basically put any criticism on the direction and producers. Subjectively, I kind of hate the performance of Maurice LaMarche as Yosemite Sam, for example, but I don’t think it has anything to do with LaMarche who most know as a terrific voice actor. The tone of the character, as likely dictated by the creative staff, is just so bland compared with the raving mad version of Mel Blanc.
It all brings me back to what I was basically wondering at the start of all of this: Is there any point to doing a sitcom starring the Looney Tunes that basically omits most of the looney business? Sure, the plot of this one involves some stuff they wouldn’t have done on Friends or Home Improvement, but I don’t know if this thing even goes beyond The Simpsons as far as breaking reality goes. It’s not laughably bad, like Lola’s play, and I’m sure a lot of people worked hard on it, like Lola’s play, but this show didn’t land for me and I don’t know if watching more is in the cards.
This show is more interesting on paper than in reality.
As a Christmas episode of a sitcom, it’s at least passable. We get a clever enough plot and I like that the show did acknowledge the existence of Santa Claus. I wasn’t sure if this more “grounded” reality would do such a thing especially since the show is apparently aimed at an adult audience and didn’t need to pander to children. Sort of like every animated sitcom though, children are a reality of the audience so I guess they didn’t want to alienate them in the process. The parts featuring Daffy and Foghorn were probably my favorite and it was a bit tighter of an experience. The play scenes were a bit repetitive and featured jokes that didn’t get funny with repetition, like Lola’s constant flubbing of her lines and the bit at the end with the trapdoor. Speaking of which, how did they get out of that thing? Must have been Christmas magic. The big guy’s speech also went on way too long, and yet when the thing ended there was still time to tack on a song. This is a slow watch, definitely something foreign to the traditional Looney Tunes experience, though I wouldn’t call it torturous. You’re just likely to be ready for it to end.
If you would like to catch this holiday themed episode of The Looney Tunes Show then the easiest way to do so is via HBO Max which has the entire series streaming as of this writing. With that platform, you never know when something may vanish, but if it does I’ll try to make sure I update this for 2023. If you’re reading this after 2023 then you’re on your own.
Can’t wait until tomorrow for more Christmas? Check out what we had to say on this day last year and beyond:
It was around Labor Day of this year that Will Sloan (@WillSloanEsq) took to Twitter to uncover the origins of an image that had confounded his girlfriend and him for the past five years. It was actually a return plea as he had posted the same image 3 years prior. The image in question was…
It was just last year that we finally broke the seal on American Dad!. It surprised me how long I was able to avoid American Dad! year in and year out since it has a wealth of Christmas episodes at its disposal. Last year, the featured Christmas episode was the very first one the show…
When someone hears the title TV Funhouse they probably first go to Saturday Night Live and The Ambiguously Gay Duo, a cartoon Batman and Robin parody that hypothesizes the relationship between the two heroes is more than just friendship. What many aren’t aware of is that the comedic short starring Steve Carell and Stephen Colbert…
When two billion dollar organizations butt heads, it can be hard to know who to root for. Take Disney, somewhat of an “evil” overlord when it comes to content, which seemingly owns everything these days and likes to throw its weight around when it comes to copyright claims. And then there’s Fox, owned by the legitimately evil Rupert Murdoch, which bares responsibility for a lot of the political discourse and genuine cesspool that is right-wing media. Back in the late 80s though, perceptions were a little different. Disney had been scorned by years of bad box office returns on its animation only recently dusting itself off with the likes of The Little Mermaid. And Fox, that was the plucky, underdog, network trying to compete in an arena that was seemingly built only for three, but they were determined to make it one built for four! Few gave them a chance, but the Fox network carved out a niche for itself by targeting a younger demographic than the likes of CBS and NBC and they weren’t afraid to try new things or get a little blue.
We know today that Fox was pretty successful in creating a fourth major network for broadcast television. A lot of that success is attributed to The Simpsons and the teen dramas that followed like Beverly Hills 90210 and Fox Sports, which is still a titan in the sports world thanks to its contracts with the NFL and Major League Baseball. I would argue another important part of the rise of Fox was cornering the younger demographic via the Fox Kids Network. In some respects, it’s said the Fox Kids brand was born out of Disney pulling back DuckTales, a popular show for Fox affiliates to carry, in order to sell its new syndicated Disney Afternoon programming block. Rather than shell out a bunch of money to Disney for the right to air its shows, Fox went out and sought other programs. Some it would simply license, others it would fund, and the Fox Kids Network would eventually become the must see block of programming in the kid world every Saturday morning and week day afternoon. Why would I, an adolescent boy, want to spend my afternoons with the cutesy Disney characters when I could be watching Batman?! Fox definitely got my eyeballs and I basically only tuned to what Disney had to offer if Fox had nothing on which made it hard to keep up with shows like Darkwing Duck and Gargoyles, shows I admittedly liked, but not always enough to ignore what Fox was showing.
I guess you won’t forget what network you’re on.
One of Fox’s earliest cartoons was Fox’s Peter Pan & the Pirates. The show was originally going to be a CBS program, but once Disney got wind that another network was preparing a show based on Peter Pan they got litigious. Or at least, they threatened litigation since they had previously made the film Peter Pan and seemed to view the character as Disney property, despite never actually buying the work of author J.M. Barrie who purposely made sure to never sell the rights to a major corporation like Disney. Still, the mere threat of the House of Mouse lawyering up gave CBS pause ultimately deciding it wasn’t worth the effort to pursue. Enter Fox, who was still stinging by the removal of DuckTales from its networks and seemed to welcome Disney’s wrath. Oh they still tried to convince Fox it was a bad idea to pursue, but Fox essentially told them to pound sand. They would file suit, but eventually they withdrew it. Part of the suit was the accusation that Fox wasn’t allowing its affiliates to purchase the Disney Afternoon for air and was having the Fox Kids Network forced upon them. To try and save face, Disney would claim when withdrawing the suit that the Disney Afternoon had worked out fine for them and Fox had found similar success with its programming so both parties needn’t feel animosity towards the other. In reality, Peter Pan had fallen into the public domain and Disney didn’t have a leg to stand on. Just because many people associated the character with Disney and it’s 1953 film didn’t mean they owned it. And since the Fox cartoon contained characters that bore no resemblance to their counterparts in the Disney film, they were pretty safe.
Fox added it’s name to the title of the show either to exert its own dominance or to further make sure no one would think this show was a work of Disney’s. The Pan of this program (voiced by Jason Marsden) was decked out in earthy browns and sported a cape. Tinker Bell (Debi Derryberry) had butterfly wings and wasn’t a blond jerk like the Disney version and the Darling characters were different enough. Also sporting a much different look was the villainous Captain James Hook, voiced by the incomparable Tim Curry. Hook’s design was quite different from the slender, mustached, villain from the Disney film as he was now a barrel-chested, clean-shaven, powdered wig wearing behemoth of an antagonist for Pan. And just to keep things even more different, his hook was moved from his left hand to his right. As far as tellings of the same story go, the show couldn’t have been more different from Disney’s film and it received a 65 episode order and was a foundational piece for the Fox Kids Network.
It’s like a Charlie Brown tree, but for pirates.
I had little interaction with the show in my youth. Something about Peter Pan struck me as a bit lame and not something I had much interest in seeking out. It’s entirely possible the show ran up against a show I was already invested in, and while I was firmly in camp Fox Kids come the fall of 1992, I wasn’t quite there in 1990. I was definitely watching the Disney Afternoon and Peter Pan wasn’t going to pull me away at that point. I also have memories of the show airing weekday mornings when I didn’t watch television as I had to get ready for school, and since I wasn’t much of a morning person, I couldn’t even flirt with the idea of watching cartoons while eating breakfast. Most of my memories of this show are just ads for it. I likely also saw it as an imposter version of Peter Pan since Disney had convinced me and millions of other kids that their Pan was the real Pan. It was also around the same time that my parents had me watch a stage play re-telling of the story that aired on television and was just dreadful and something I hated every moment of. I had given Pan a shot outside of Disney once and felt burned, I wasn’t going to do it again. Well, not until the likes of Robin Williams and Steven Spielberg, anyway.
In the quest for more Christmas though, I was reminded that this show existed. During that lone run of 65 episodes was the episode “Hook’s Christmas.” Generally speaking, direct-to-syndication shows like this try to avoid holiday episodes since networks like to be able to just throw them on at anytime without consideration for something as annoying as a season. Fox apparently didn’t care though as many of their shows would delight in doing Halloween and Christmas episodes. I feel like I’ve looked at almost all of them at this point. A show that’s all about kids wanting to remain kids seems like a show that could do Christmas. Then again, I don’t know that Peter and his fellow lost boys are necessarily “Nice List” candidates, and there are no parents to play Santa in Neverland. I guess the staff on the show agreed since this episode centers on Captain Hook and is an adaptation of A Christmas Carol. I tend to avoid such fare like the plague, but my curiosity for this show outweighed my hatred for the trope. Did I miss out on a hidden gem? The possibility was there given the voice cast and the fact that TMS contributed animation to this show. It was not a cheap cartoon and I suppose that makes sense since Fox likely wanted to impress out of the gate. Plus, Disney was spending a lot of money on its animated programs and no one at Fox wanted to look inferior next to Disney, so let’s see what Fox’s Peter Pan & the Pirates has to offer.
Just a bunch of pirates having a festive sing-a-long.
The opening title for this one is a lyric-less piece set to clips from the show, the most boring of intros a cartoon can have, but the score isn’t bad. It sounds like a poor man’s John Williams. When the episode begins, we’re on the ship of one Captain Hook and the pirates are making merry. It’s Christmas Eve so there’s cause to be jolly. Unfortunately, they’re singing a rendition of the worst Christmas song ever written: “The Twelve Days of Christmas.” Now, since I didn’t watch this show growing up, I have to try to figure out who’s who among the gang of pirates. It would seem Gentlemen Ignatious P. Starkey (David Shaughnessy) is the one leading the crew in song. He has repurposed the song to make the captain the generous one handing out gifts on Christmas. It would seem he wants a new ship that’s bilge free? All of the versions of this episode that exist online have some audio degradation and deciphering song lyrics is not easy. Eucrates Cookson (Jack Angel) is playing an accordian while Smee (Ed Gilbert) is decorating a rather pathetic looking tree. They’re all chiming in with gifts for the other days, but they only manage to get to day 4 before Starkey has trouble remembering the lines.
No one is allowed to be merry when this guy is around.
It’s at that point Captain Hook makes his entrance. He towers over the lot as he heads down into the brig to reprimand his men for their joyful demeanors. Tim Curry practically snarls his lines, but maintains his rather dignified accent, making for a rather compelling character. His vocabulary is also impeccable and I rather like this depiction of the famed captain quite a bit. Starkey is literally shaking in his boots as Hook enters demanding to know why an irredeemable twit like him would have reason to be merry. When it’s suggested to him by the men that Christmas is the reason, Hook rejects the notion that the holiday is an excuse to behave like fools. I would say he’s angered by the suggestion, but he just seems plain angry all of the time so it’s hard to say just what ticks him off the most. He’s definitely channeling his inner Scrooge as he refers to Christmas as a “humbug,” which causes Smee to reply with, “But I thought it was a holiday?” He further illustrates his feelings on the matter by suggesting those who celebrate should be boiled in their own pudding and have a stake of holly shoved through their heart! This dude is vicious.
That’s not going to work, man.
Smee can’t take a hint as he asks if this means they won’t be exchanging gifts. Scrooge, I mean Hook, looks almost pained by this question, but rather than respond verbally he kicks over their makeshift tree and stomps on the reindeer ornament one of the pirates made. Hook storms off into his own quarters still seething at the fact that his men are just trying to use Christmas as a way to get out of a dishonest day’s work! He takes a seat at his harpsichord and goes to play something, apparently this is how he settles down when the world angers him, only the instrument begins to play by itself! And it’s playing “The Twelve Days of Christmas,” which has Hook looking all kinds of angry (it’s basically his only facial expression). A voice then calls out to him using his first name. It’s a woman’s voice, and Hook looks startled as he whirls around and even asks “Mother?” How sweet? An apparition comes floating in baring the resemblance of Wendy Darling (Christina Lange) which actually excites Hook. He declares he’ll capture her which is surely to rile up that Peter Pan fellow. Unfortunately for Hook, this is basically not-Wendy, but the Ghost of Christmas Past. You know how this is going to go from here. Hook tries to dismiss her as some sort of product of indigestion and even declares he doesn’t believe in her, like that will make her go away.
Never ask a man to choose between love and being a pirate.
It won’t. The Wendy ghost takes Hook back in time to another version of the Jolly Roger. Or maybe just a ship that looks like it. A gang of pirates has recently overtaken this UK vessel and hoisted their own flag. Their leader? A pirate named Jasper – Jasper Hook! A voice calls out to him from offscreen and we see it belongs to a young James Hook. The two brothers clasp hands to draw attention to the lack of a hook as Jasper pulls him aboard and they’re positively giddy about this score. At least that is, until James sees who this ship belonged to. It’s a woman named Cecilia (sounds like Lange) whom James is betrothed to. Present Hook seems a bit wary of watching how this plays out. Through their conversation we find out she was under the impression that James was a merchant, but it’s the life of a buccaneer that he’s chosen instead. He thinks this changes nothing between the two, but Cecilia begs to differ with tears in her eyes. James can’t be bothered and has the men haul her away like a prisoner. Captain James Hook, who has been watching alongside the Ghost of Christmas Past, questions why she means to torment him so? He demands she take him back to his ship, but she informs him they have one more “shadow” to visit first.
You dare pay the future Captain Hook as much as the rest of the crew?!
Past snaps her fingers and we’re whisked away to the interior of a pirate ship. If it’s the same one, I don’t know, but it is following a score as Jasper is handing out gold from a chest to each crew member. When he goes to give James his cut, the younger Hook balks for his brother is giving him the same as everyone else. Jasper reminds him who the captain is, but James declares that maybe it’s time for a new captain. Drawing his sword, with his right hand mind you, he challenges his brother who seems angered by this disloyalty. The two start clanging swords and end up back on the deck. The elder Hook, fighting with sword and dagger, disarms his brother and his sword winds up stuck near the top of the mast. He tells James to surrender and he’ll spare his life, but James refuses and instead climbs up the mast to retrieve his sword.
Sword fights seem to always end up way up here when it comes to pirates.
Now the two brothers are battling atop the sail, which seems like the most dangerous place to have a sword fight on a pirate ship. It looks cool though, and now it’s James’ turn to disarm his brother. He informs the captain that, unfortunately, he does not believe in taking prisoners and declines to extend the same offer to his brother that he just made him. Jasper isn’t about to let himself be cut down and instead makes a jump for it by grabbing on one of the ropes affixed to the sail. He is able to get down to the deck and retrieve his sword, but James is in hot pursuit. He takes a mighty cut at his brother which shatters his sword. Jasper, backpedaling, gets his feet tangled in some rope left on the deck and falls onto his rear. As James approaches, he has a wicked grin upon his face and his sword held high as his brother looks up at him with a terrified expression.
Time for ghost #2.
Before we can see the gruesome aftermath of this confrontation, Hook demands the spirit cease this vision. He then wakes up in his chair in a sweat with a look of distress upon his face that is soon replaced with his usual, grumpy, demeanor. He apparently believes that he did indeed see the past via the magic of some sort of spectre for he calls out to her in defiance. He taunts her by asking aloud if she thought she could really stir feelings of guilt and remorse within him over, as he terms it, relieving his brother of his eye. Apparently, he did not kill his brother that day, only maimed him. He takes a seat at his desk and begins to question if he really did see what he saw. As he settles down to read from a book, the voice of Smee calls out to him. This only further irritates Hook, who turns his head and sees a ghost version of his first mate. He correctly deduces that this is not really Smee, but another apparition, and the ghost confirms that he is indeed the Ghost of Christmas Present causing Hook to question if he is forever to be bedeviled by Christmas. Smee, which we’ll just refer to the ghost as such to make it easier, tells Hook that Christmas normally doesn’t concern itself with a villain such as he which enrages Hook for some reason as he shouts “blast your incorporeal hide!” The writing for Hook is just phenomenol. I normally am far too charmed by old VHS recordings to care much for quality, but in this case, I wish the audio quality were better on my source so I could properly make out every word this show has Tim Curry spit out. He is fantastic.
Hey! Did you know this is a show about Peter Pan?!
Smee informs the captain that he’ll be coming with him and blows a whistle of some kind to whisk the pair away. They’re in a lovely glen and in the center of which is an enormous Christmas tree. Children are singing “Deck the Halls” and it’s quickly revealed that this tree belongs to Peter Pan and the Lost Boys. The children finish their song and we see Tinker Bell come flying in to apparently take on the role of a star atop the tree which will surely get old fast for the fairy. Smee and Hook then come into view and Hook seems more than a little irritated to have been brought here by this “woebegone wraith.” Smee tells him that he just wanted to show Hook how the Neverland-lubbers celebrate Christmas. Hook is positively annoyed and basically calls Smee an idiot declaring he has no appetite for seeing how the unwashed celebrate the holiday. His utter disdain for everything is truly impressive.
I wasn’t expecting snow in this one.
Hook expresses his irritations with ghost Smee, and while the two converse I noticed a curiosity. I watched multiple versions of this episode, and in some the background changes to what’s coming in the next scene while in others it remains consistent. It would seem they had an issue and must have actually paid to have it fixed for rebroadcast. Anyway, we pivot to Wendy and Peter having a conversation about the decor. She thinks something is missing and Peter soon realizes it’s snow, but he also seems to have forgotten what snow is (this forgetfulness is foreshadowing something to come). Tinker Bell (Debi Derryberry) remarks how humans have such short memories before tossing some pixie dust all over the place which makes it snow. The top of the tree also still features a glowing orb so maybe Tink just cast some sort of spell to create a makeshift star? Snow soon collects on the tree and the kids are happy. Pan even nails John with a snowball who is happy to fight back. Hook has seen enough and demands that Smee evacuate him from the area, but not before he gets his bearings so that he may return to the lair of Pan and raze it to the ground! Smee informs him he will be doing no such thing and instead toots his whistle again.
A toast to Captain Hook!
Now we’re in the lair of Pan and The Lost Boys and they’re all preparing for a Christmas feast. A platter appears via Tinker Bell’s magic upon the table and the kids are all excited. It looks like they eat real food and not junk food as seen in the film Hook. When Wendy lifts the lid on the dish the kids are dismayed to find a single acorn. If you think this is a Tiny Tim situation you would be mistaken as Tinker Bell informs them it was just a little holiday jest and quickly magics up a turkey. Before the kids can dig in though, Wendy says they should offer up a toast. Peter is in agreement and toasts to…himself. He quickly adds “And everyone else,” rather awkwardly, but the others seem to pay it no mind. I’m guessing they’re used to this sort of thing out of Pan. Michael (Whit Hertford) then questions if he really means everyone and specifically mentions Captain Hook. Wendy comes over to confirm that even Hook is deserving of such a toast. Pan snorts and remarks that if Hook were there he’d cut off his other hand and give it to him as a Christmas present. How violent! Wendy scolds him for his boast and Pan reluctantly concedes that she’s right. He stands up and gives a somewhat half-hearted toast to Captain Hook which the other kids share in.
No matter who is Captain Hook, it would seem Smee always gets the worst of it.
Hook then questions what’s the point of all this? Smee informs him that he just wants to show him that even bitter enemies lay down their arms on Christmas. Hook indicates he has no stomach for this “sentimental tripe,” which Smee says is unfortunate because he has more to show him. We’re then taken to the bowels of the Jolly Roger where the rest of the crew resides. The pirates are still sore from how Hook treated them and they seem to be ready to mutiny over it. As they draw their weapons, it’s Smee who pops in to declare they’ll be doing it over his dead body. He starts clashing swords with Mullins (Jack Angel) and tries to defend his captain’s honor. Hook remarks to the ghost Smee that he intends to put these jackanapes in their place, but the ghost tells him that’s not why he chose to show him this. Suddenly, the material version of Hook comes swaddling in demanding to know what’s going on. Smee informs him it’s a mutiny and Hook misunderstands him and seemingly thinks that Smee is declaring a mutiny, not trying to stop one. He picks Smee up by his shirt utilizing his hook while the little guy tries to tell him he had his best interests at heart. Hook puts him down seemingly understanding, only to double-down on his accusations by demanding Mullins chain Smee and toss him in the brig. As the first mate is hauled away he tells him this will be his last Christmas! This is really clumsy considering this is supposed to be the present, but it features Hook! Why didn’t we see this earlier?
“So brother, you’re looking well these days.”
Hook, the viewing Hook, is politely reprimanded by ghost Smee for his misjudgement. Hook seems unphased and remarks that Smee should basically be killed on principal anyway. The ghost, seemingly admitting defeat, informs Hook he’ll be returning him to his ship now. Hook then materializes outside his cabin door and is immediately sent into a rage for he can hear someone playing his harpsichord inside his chambers! He smashes down the door, which was a really lovely piece that will now have to be replaced, and barges in demanding to know who possesses the temerity to play the harpsichord of Captain James Hook! Why, it’s his brother Jasper now acting as the Spirit of Christmas Yet to Come. Hook has apparently still not grasped the situation for he mistakes the ghost for his actual brother and attempts to cut him down with his blade only for it to pass harmlessly right through him. The ghost, sporting an eye patch as the real Jasper must, smiles wickedly at Hook and informs him who he really is, and isn’t. Hook sarcastically asks him of what concern is all of this to him only for the spirit to float above him and angrily call out his misdeeds. He’s lied to his loved ones, betrayed his own flesh and blood, and condemned the one man who showed him loyalty. Flipping up the patch over his eye, the spirit promises to show Hook the bitter harvest yet to come.
Upon seeing his ship in ruins, Hook reacts like a dad who just found out his kid snuck out in his sports car and nailed a fire hydrant.
We’re taken to the wreckage of a ship I assume to be Hook’s Jolly Roger. It is indeed his as he immediately starts ranting and raving about the condition of his ship. We then see Mullins stealing food from Cookson as the two emerge from a cave with the captain nowhere to be found. Hook is displeased by this showing, but the spirit has more to share. He flips up his patch and we’re transported to a swampy lagoon. A disheveled and seemingly delirious Smee is walking through the ankle deep water carrying something under his arm and shouting out to his captain not to worry for he’s coming. He approaches a large, hollowed out tree and declares “There ya be captain, a fresh covering of moss for yee,” revealing that the garbage under his arm is apparently a bunch of moss. The ghostly Hook is confused by this and declares he’d retire to Bedlam before he’d let someone like Smee take care of him. Still refusing to realize what story he’s in, we watch as Smee goes to enter the tree only for the shadow of Peter Pan to pass over him. He runs calling out a warning to his captain as he disappears into the tree, but the somewhat sullen Pan doesn’t seem like he’s here for a fight.
Aww, Peter misses Captain Hook.
It’s at this point that Hook utters a version of the famous line asking the spirit “Are these the shadows of the things that will be, or are they the shadows of the things that maybe?” The spirit ignores the question and instead points out to Hook to gaze upon his final resting place. The captain looks a tad frightened as he beholds his unmarked grave which Peter Pan has knelt beside. The spirit refers to it as unmarked, but the grave is indeed marked by the presence of his famous hook on a stick of some sort, he just doesn’t get a tombstone. Peter then pulls out his dagger and remarks he has no need of it now. He seems a bit sad as he’s clearly lost his purpose in life without his adversary and ponders if he should finally grow up and leave Neverland. Now this puts a smile on Hook’s face as he declares this perfect! He laughs heartily and declares that in death he has finally defeated Peter Pan! The spirit then cautions him not to act so hastily and flips up his eyepatch once again.
Here comes the meltdown.
Now we’re transported to a more colorful and bright setting. The Lost Boys are seated by the edge of some trees until Peter Pan comes soaring in. He excitedly calls out to them to “Look what I found!” It’s the hook of one Captain Hook, and Peter acts like he has no idea where it came from, but now they can play pirates! The boys fly off with Peter Pan declaring that he’ll be the pirate leader: Captain Claw! Hook is bewildered at the sight and the spirit is happily able to inform him that the kids quickly forgot all about him once he was dead. This basically destroys Hook who falls to his knees and starts raking the earth with his hook hand. Crying out, “Hear me brother: I am not the man I was! I will change! I swear it! I swear it!”
It’s celebration time, men! Debauchery, murder, looting, you name it!
As he cries out, we transition back to Hook’s quarters and find him raking his hook hand over his mattress essentially destroying it in the process. He soon realizes that he’s back in his room, and even his door is intact! He calls out for Mullins who enters immediately for the captain to ask him to confirm what day is it? “Why, it’s Christmas, sir!” he replies on cue. Hook declares this excellent and orders him to assemble the men on the deck immediately. This also comes with an order to release Smee from the brig. Once everyone is gathered on the deck, Hook informs the men that he’s changed his mind that they will observe the Christmas holiday after all. The men are dumbstruck with Starkey remarking the captain has lost his senses. Hook corrects him to say he has not lost his senses, but rather found them. He then orders the men to arm themselves as he dumps a pile of weapons on the deck and informs them that they will be going ashore to celebrate Christmas with a raid on Peter Pan!
Merry Christmas, indeed.
Hook, with his arms outstretched, then clarifies what has taken place. He says he swore he’d change, and he will, for the worse! “I’ll redouble my attacks on Pan. I’ll triple them!” It’s hard to make out precisely what he says following that, but he basically declares that Peter Pan will never forget the name of Captain James Hook! He then cries out “Merry Christmas, Peter Pan,” as his cape bellows menacingly in the wind, “and prepare to meet thy doom!” He then walks off laughing his evil laugh which is the lasting image for this holiday affair.
“Hook’s Christmas” is not a very interesting episode as it relates to Christmas. It adapts what some may call a tried-and-true Christmas staple, but what many would also just call a tired plot. A Christmas Carol is beyond overdone and it was in the early 90s just as it was today. This one does have a bit of a wrinkle in that it’s Scrooge character, one Captain James Hook, is truly irredeemable. There’s no changing who he is. Sure, many a villainous character have had their Christmases interrupted by a gang of spirits and it was enough for them to at least do one nice thing, but not Hook! It has the opposite effect, which is really the only outcome that could have come of this since he’s quite clearly an evil man and there are many more episodes to follow. They could have had him just be a little nice to his crew and let that be it, but I do like that the writers on this one wanted none of that and fully held onto this characterization of Hook.
For regular viewers, it was probably fun to see a young Hook and his brother in this one.
That’s not enough to rescue the plot from this droll retelling, but the depiction of Captain Hook just might be. I was totally smitten with this take on the character by Tim Curry. He is wonderfully written with just a delicious vocabulary. This is not some rough and tough pirate covered in grime and ill-spoken. This Hook is dignified and above everyone else in his mind. He carries himself like royalty and he’s clearly well-educated. He’s just vile and despicable and he loves that about himself. Curry is just absolutely wonderful in the role and I hung on every word he said. Adapting A Christmas Carol may not have been the soundest decision this show made, but putting an entire episode on Hook’s shoulders absolutely was. Combining the performance with the twist ending basically does the impossible: I was entertained by A Christmas Carol. I mean, the classic story is fine and entertaining on its own, but I can’t think of many episodes of television that went in this direction and actually succeeded. Years ago, I somewhat praisedThe Real Ghostbusters for putting their own spin on the tale, but I still wouldn’t call that episode good and it’s not something I ever return to. And I’m not saying I’m ever going to return to “Hook’s Christmas” either, but I may consider it. If I had any nostalgic attachment to the show it’s from then I probably would, but lacking that, it’s more just a fun little diamond in the rough one discovers when doing such an exercise as this and I’m feeling satisfied. Usually, most of the uncovered Christmas episodes I come across leave me feeling the opposite.
It’s a shame this performance isn’t more celebrated than it is. Tim Curry is my Captain Hook.
If you wish to view Fox’s Peter Pan & the Pirates you sadly have few options. Remember that whole story to begin this about Disney not wanting this show to exist? Yeah, well, now they own it. Disney acquired this alongside a whole bunch of other Fox properties years ago with the acquisition of Fox Kids Worldwide. Disney has released some of those shows on DVD and licensed others for streaming, but not this one (aside from a select few episodes in the UK) and they likely never will. They would fear that consumers would think this ties into their own take on Peter Pan even with the title being what it is. And it’s a shame, because if nothing else the show appears to have some solid animation. This particular episode wasn’t impressive in that regard, but other clips I’ve seen look quite nice. And people are missing out on this fantastic version of Captain Hook. I don’t know if the show itself is really worth watching, but it would be nice if it were available for those who did grow up watching it or who are just curious. The only good thing is that Disney doesn’t seem at all interested in enforcing its trademark here so the show can be found scattered across the internet in varying states of quality. You don’t have to look hard, though you will if you want to find the best quality version possible. As you can tell by the images in this post, I had trouble doing just that (the best I found was on the channel Cartoon Archive), but what I did find was certainly watchable. It’s just a shame most cut out the commercials.
Can’t wait until tomorrow for more Christmas? Check out what we had to say on this day last year and beyond:
In 1964, Arthur Rankin and Jules Bass unleashed a Christmas Classic upon the world in the form of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. The special basically put the company on the map and put it on the path to holiday domination for decades to come. Despite that, few of the specials that followed Rudolph truly hit…
Not every Looney Tunes or Merrie Melodies star had to be inherently funny. Sure, most of them were and that’s often what many cartoon enthusiasts will point to the Warner catalog of cartoons as having over Disney, but it wasn’t some hard and fast rule. That’s why when a guy by the name of Chuck…
When it comes to British imports and the subject of bears is brought up, most probably immediately think of Paddington or Winnie the Pooh. Few probably recall SuperTed, the Welsh teddy bear brought to life by a spotted alien and given super powers by Mother Nature. SuperTed is similar to Mighty Mouse in that he…
Four Horsemen Studios is back with another holiday release in its Figura Obscura line of action figures. This sister line of their more famous Mythic Legions property launched two years ago with Krampus and continued with last year’s Father Christmas. Many fans, myself included, expected another holiday figure this year, though if you had asked me a week ago what that figure would be I would have been pretty stumped. The line seemed to target characters of folklore, and while there are certainly some more out there for Christmas, none seemed as obvious as Krampus or a version of Santa Claus. I probably would have guessed some kind of yeti, or maybe Jack Frost, but Four Horsemen Studios surprised me with an action figure of the ghostly Jacob Marley.
He comes sans chains, but he’s not likely to stay that way for long.I love how the feet just disappear.
Marley comes from the pages of the Charles Dickens classic A Christmas Carol. If you have never read the original source you have almost certainly encountered the story as told by someone else be it Mickey Mouse or Gonzo. Marley doesn’t immediately strike me as a folklore type of character, but then again, we’re talking about a story that’s been ingrained in Christmas since 1843 so perhaps I may need to rethink my personal definition of folklore. Regardless, a spectral figure draped in chains with its jaw held in place by a knot sure sounds like something that would lend itself well to what Four Horsemen does. The character was teased with an image of chains and locks, a dead give-away, and then finally unveiled and put up for order on December 2nd. I thought it looked cool enough to warrant a purchase, and it was in my hands a mere three days later so now I’m going to interrupt the Christmas special posts to tell you what I think.
The detail on this figure is incredible, though I wish this harness had a better way to fasten.
Marley arrives in the standard window box for the line with a wrap-around backdrop held in place by magnets. It’s a terrific way to include a backdrop as the cardstock is nice and heavy. On the front is an image of Marley as a doorknocker from the novella and on the reverse is an interior painting of Scrooge’s bed chambers (the artwork is credited to Nate Baerstch) complete with a terrified Scrooge by the fire. Scrooge being present in the image makes me wonder if that means he’s not a candidate for a figure of his own down the line, but I guess we’ll see in the years to come. There’s a description of Marley on the back as well and Four Horsemen even included a small (4.125″ x 5.25″) copy of Stave 1 of the story with more illustrations inside. The actual box depicts various specters from the story from when Scrooge looks out his window initially. I’m assuming some are based on the descriptions Dickens provides, though I haven’t read the original text in probably 25 years to recall specifics. I do plan on reading this first stave before the season departs.
There’s a lot going on here.
Marley himself stands 7″ tall and out of the box he does not have his chains affixed to him. This design is credited to Eric Treadaway, one of the three founders of Four Horsemen Studios (I’m guessing there is a reason why there are three, but the name implies four), and Marley certainly looks the part of a dead 1840s rich guy. He has an aged and weathered face with long hair and thick sideburns. He’s sporting a long coat and a rather fancy looking vest beneath that with a kerchief around his neck. The figure is basically all done in tones of blue and gray. His skin is painted in a shade similar to periwinkle and shaded with cyan blue. The hair and interior of the coat are more of a gray blue and the buttons on his coat are a faint silver. I have always considered the strength of Mythic Legions to be the sculpt and paint combo and Marley does not do anything to dissuade me from that manner of thinking. There’s some great texture on the coat, he’s got a missing chunk of flesh on his rather large forehead, and all of the buttons and pockets look real. The coat is a pliable plastic as opposed to soft goods and I think that was the correct route to go. It hangs well, has a good form to it, and could fool someone from the shelf.
To fly, or not to fly?
Marley looks, in a word, awesome. This figure is phenomenal when it comes to the presentation, and I’ve barely scratched the surface. The coat appears to be a clear plastic that’s been painted. It must be, since the hem of the coat is where the paint starts to fade out so we can get a translucent effect. I’m amazed at how well the paint looks on this thing given the amount needed to pull this off. The boots below the cuffs are also done in transparent plastic and the paint fades out on them as well as it moves down leaving the actual foot portion completely transparent. I don’t think it takes much imagination to come up with such a paint scheme, but it takes talent and skill to pull it off and man does this figure ever pull it off. He looks great standing, but I’m really tempted to put him on a flight stand to draw attention to the transparent parts.
You’re in some serious shit, Scrooge.
Of course, Marley wouldn’t be Marley without his many shackles and chains. Even Goofy was forced to drag those things around. The chains are all connected to a soft, plastic, harness that is designed to go over Marley’s torso. The harness looks nice, has a big lock on the front, but is a challenge to get on. I wasn’t sure how I was supposed to do so and thought I may need to pop the arms off in order to get it in place. Instead, the bottom rear came apart as I examined it and I think it’s supposed to do that? There’s no tab, nor is their any glues residue to imply it came apart by accident, but it did allow me to get the harness on. It, like the belt that came with last year’s Father Christmas, doesn’t fasten well though which makes me wonder if it was supposed to come apart. I wish it had a tab to hold it in place, because it will repeatedly come apart when handling the figure and might even do so when not. I secured it with a tiny amount of gray mounting putty since it was driving me nuts.
Anything that looks like it should open, can. Well, except the books. And the locks…Keys for days!
That annoyance aside, the harness and chains really bring some added drama to the presentation of this one. He has quite a few chains of varying lengths and design. They’re all a muted copper or a dingy brushed nickel and there’s padlocks and skeleton keys throughout. Three chains end in a lockbox while two in a ledger and they’re all unique designs so not one box is the same as the other. The boxes also all open from the top in case you want to hide anything inside. There’s also a large safe at the end of another chain and that can open as well. Inside you’ll find a bonus, unadvertised, accessory that does fit the mood of this figure, but could also be used with another Mythic Legions release. Since it’s a surprise, I’ve declined to take a picture of it, but know that it is pretty cool and I like it better than the surprise inclusions with Father Christmas.
“If you’re gonna scream, scream with me!”
The chains are not Marley’s only accessories as he does also come with various hands and a second portrait. He has gripping hands out of the box, but also has a set of gripping hands with a vertical hinge, style pose gesture hands, and a set of clawing hands. The second portrait depicts Marley with his headwrap removed which causes his jaw to droop and hang slightly askew. It’s appropriately unpleasant to look at, but the large mouth opening does sometimes come off as a bit cartoony. It’s really well painted and looks amazing, but I don’t know if I’ll ever actually use it. Marley also has a pair of door knockers featuring his visage, one shows him in a stoic fashion while the other has him wailing. There’s a slot on the back if you want to hang them on a nail, though they’re not so heavy that mounting putty wouldn’t work. The knocker portion also moves and the paint job and sculpt are terrific. Lastly, there’s also a small pouch of extra skeleton keys. There are multiple designs, though I have not bothered to count how many actual keys are in there, but know that it’s a lot. You will never have need of more. Four Horsemen also tossed in a greeting card featuring the cover art, as they did for the past two releases which is cool.
Even these door knockers are impressive as they have little, flecks, of green to show age and weathering.
The Ghost of Jacob Marley is an action figure, so it stands to reason that he should articulate rather well. Mythic Legions strikes me as a line that is focused on the aesthetic at the expense of articulation. That doesn’t mean the articulation is bad, but certain styles of joints are basically off the table. For the head, we have a simple ball joint. There’s no hinge or double-ball, but it seems adequate for the figure. Marley’s hair prevents him from looking up anyway, and the scarf has to be worked around to look down, but he gets some range in doing so. There’s a little tilt as well, and it seems suitable enough. The shoulders are hinged ball-pegs, and on my figure they were pretty stuck. The figure was delivered to the northeast in December, so it was quite cold to begin with. I let it warm up for an hour or so, but still needed to apply hot water to get the hinge to work. Once free, the arms raised out to the side to pretty much a full horizontal position. Rotation is fine, but there’s no bicep swivel. Instead, we get single-hinged elbows that can also swivel. We see this a lot with Super7 (and Four Horsemen Studios designed a lot of their early figures), but with this figure the cut is better so the range on the swivel is fine and it also looks pretty good. Hands rotate and hinge and we have gripping hands with both a horizontal and vertical hinge – perfect!
In the torso, there’s no joint except for the waist. There we have a ball joint, and it allows for a reasonable amount of forward and back with plenty of tilt and rotation. Obviously, once you put the harness on the figure it’s a little trickier to work with, but nothing is truly hindered. The hips are hinged ball-pegs and Marley can hit a split reasonably well. He can’t kick forward quite all the way, nor can he kick back very far. There is a thigh twist which is well-hidden, and the knee is a single hinge with twist like the elbows and it’s well cut. There is a boot swivel below the boot cuff, while the ankle also swivels. There’s a hinge which lets the foot go forward and back basically as far as you’d ever want it to go, and there’s also an ankle rocker. The peg that goes into the shin, likely due to the nature of transparent plastic, is a little loose and the foot may pop off on occasion. The figure doesn’t have any issue standing and all of the other joints are suitably tight. Only the shoulders were overtight for me, and swapping hands and heads wasn’t an issue.
Marley may not pair all that well with what’s come before him, but it sure sounds like he will with what’s to follow.
If you have any of the Figura Obscura figures released up until now, then you’re likely not surprised to find out that this one is fantastic. It’s not going to articulate as well as some other figures out there, but it can do everything it needs to and the articulation choices feel well thought out. The presentation is what sells this guy, and while the harness isn’t the tidiest thing to work with, there’s no denying how terrific it looks in practice. My only real gripe is with how said harness fastens to the figure as I feel like almost anything would have been better, but it’s something I can work around. I’m never going to take it off so I could even glue it if I want to, though I typically refrain from permanently modifying any of my figures. The end of the included Stave 1 booklet includes the message, “You will be haunted again. The ghosts of Christmas shall return,” which sure seems to imply that we’ll be getting more from A Christmas Carol next year and beyond. Will they stick with Past, Present, and Christmas Yet to Come, or maybe some of the other, unnamed, ghosts on the packaging will get figures? And what about Scrooge? He’s on the backdrop, so maybe Four Horsemen Studios thinks that will be enough, but I bet fans would like to see an actual Scrooge as well. Only time will tell, but I bet whatever comes next will look awesome.
If you would like to add The Ghost of Jacob Marley to your collection then I’m afraid I have some bad news. The initial stock has sold out, so right now the figure is only available on the secondhand market. The MSRP was $60, but expect to pay considerably more if buying from a reseller. Both Krampus and Father Christmas had variant releases, so it seems likely that Marley will as well. Maybe with more of a spectral green coloring? Or something closer to fully transparent? Four Horsemen also had the original version of Father Christmas available for purchase this year, so perhaps this version of Marley could even come back next December. If you missed out and absolutely have to have it, then by all means do as you please, but I do think the patient will be rewarded at some point.
Missed out on some other past Christmas releases? Check these out:
Over the years, I’ve acquired quite a few action figures designed by the good people over at Four Horsemen LLC. They’ve been designing figures for companies for awhile now. My first exposure to the company was via NECA’s inaugural line of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles based on their appearance in the Mirage Studios comics. Lately,…
It was just last year that Four Horsemen launched a subline of its popular Mythic Legions brand of action figures called Figura Obscura. Practically speaking, there’s little difference between the two lines as Mythic Legions seeks to serve as a modular line of toys based on myth and legend and that doesn’t feature licensed characters.…
It was looking like we were in for a photo finish this year. Last year, toymaker Fresh Monkey Fiction partnered with online retailer Big Bad Toy Store to launch the Naughty or Nice collection. Structured similar to a Kickstarter campaign, FMF posted several action figures for preorder with a minimum order quantity needed for the…
We touched on it a bit just a few days ago when we talked about The Justice League, and we’re going to do it again! What is “it?” Why, the launch of The WB, of course! The network fronted by Warner Bros. was a newcomer in the mid 90s and was here to challenge the other broadcast channels, mostly Fox. Unfortunately for Warner, a lot of their intellectual property was unavailable to start because they had signed agreements with other networks. Again, mostly Fox. In order to launch some original programming aimed at kids, they basically had to come up with some new ideas for some old characters which is how we ended up with The Sylvester & Tweety Mysteries. This show would pair the often adversarial characters of Sylvester and Tweety (both voiced by Joe Alasky) in a mystery solving plot, something that felt more Hanna-Barbera than Warner Bros. With them was Granny (June Foray) who was in charge of basically steering the whole ship and also along for the ride was Hector (Frank Welker) the bull dog, because you need a dog apparently. Plus, it’s reminiscent of Gift Wrapped to have him along.
The show got its 52 episode order and occupied some air space in the 90s without sucking. It did its job.
This isn’t our first dance with the show as we covered the episode “Feather Christmas” a few years back. For that reason, I don’t feel a long preamble is needed this time around. We’ll just jump right into today’s episode which is a parody of It’s a Wonderful Life, but not in the way you think. Many shows have gone that route over the years and they almost exclusively run with the plot of George Bailey who has to learn a lesson about how much the world would suck without him. Or suck more, anyway. This time, we’re rolling with the Uncle Billy character. You remember him, right? He’s the idiot who mistakenly lost two thousand dollars when trying to one-up old man Potter. It was his screw-up that nearly drove George to suicide since losing that amount of money back then could cripple a business like a savings and loan. Now, I’m not a huge fan of the film. It’s fine and a genuine classic, I just don’t feel the need to watch it on an annual basis like my parents and probably most boomers. One thing though that always bothered me when I did watch it is that Potter never gets his comeuppance. Uncle Billy mistakenly hands over that two grand to the old man and he just pockets it, basically. This episode of a cartoon starring a canary and a cat is going to try to make Potter answer for his deceit by solving the mystery of what happened to the money.
He’s the spitting image of Thomas Mitchell’s Uncle Billy.
The episode begins with a cold open. Sylvester is narrating the story and it takes us to the town of Bedspread Falls, instead of Bedford Falls. Sylvester begins his narration as-if he’s going to tell us about Paul Revere’s midnight ride, but corrects himself and switches to a ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas styled rhyme. A gray-haired man of generous proportions is currently fretting about a missing sum of money in the Daily Bros. Loan & Building Building. It was established in 1946, which even if you were unaware could probably guess is the year It’s a Wonderful Life was released. This older fellow has apparently misplaced eight thousand dollars, because we need to up the amount here to make it a little more painful. While he tosses papers aside from the floor a familiar duo looks on. That would be the mice Hubie (Jim Cummings) and Bertie (Jeff Bennett). They feel for the poor guy who is just throwing himself on the floor in despair and want to do something to help him. A Christmas card gets their attention and it would appear it has an answer for them. The old man has since taken a seat at his desk with his head in his arms and the mice place the card in front of him. When he looks at it, we get to see it’s a card from Granny, who signs her cards Granny because that’s just her name apparently. Overjoyed, the fellow grabs his old-timey phone and makes a call!
This seems very unnecessary, Granny. And who is her hook-up for this stuff? Bruce Wayne?!
The opening title then enters and it’s underwhelming considering how good the WB shows on Fox were at the time, but not terrible. When it ends, we find Granny riding through the street in a car with giant, metal, legs. It’s like an AT-ST from The Return of the Jedi. Her animal companions are riding in the car with her and everyone is decked out in some holiday attire. Sylvester continues his narration to inform us that they’re heading to Bedspread Falls and shouts out to Donna Reed. When Granny slams on the breaks to this contraption, the occupants (except her) all go flying out of it because it’s a topless vehicle which makes so much sense to ride around in during the winter. They smash into a snowman so we get a tiered look at all three occupying one of the three segments of the snow creature while Granny admonishes them for playing in the snow and wasting time. Someone needs to narc on Granny for animal cruelty.
An early indicator that Willy isn’t too bright.
We then head into the Daily Bros. and meet the old guy again. It turns out his name is Willy (instead of Billy, naturally) and he’s Granny’s brother (his voice is also uncredited, but I think it’s Bennett). That explains why he got a Christmas card from the old gal. She happily introduces him to her pet canary, Tweety, but he slams the door on poor Sylvester and Hector. He hears the door contact them and mistakes it for a knock, opens it, and the two waddle in flat as a pancake. Granny introduces the pair and Sylvester has to blow himself back up to return to his normal shape. Willy then introduces them to his pets, Hubie and Bertie, and Sylvester is happy to meet them as he gobbles them up immediately. Seriously Willy, why are you waving your pet rodents in the face of a cat? Granny turns him upside down and smacks his bottom until the two mice are set free all the while admonishing Sylvester for trying to eat family. The mice roll over to Tweety’s cage where the little bird chirps, “Been there, done that.”
The Minah bird is a memorable gag from classic era Looney Tunes in that once you see it you’ll immediately recall seeing it before, but maybe without specifics. His routine in this episode is basically exactly the same as it was back then.
Granny wants to get down to business and asks Willy what’s wrong? He tells her he misplaced the weekly deposit, which happened to be 8 grand. He explains he put it in a yellow envelope and brought it to the bank, but when he got there, the money was gone! She basically just pats him on the shoulder to comfort him. Meanwhile, Hector is nosing around and comes to a file cabinet. It jiggles, then opens, and he barks a whole bunch until a disinterested crow pops out (Uncle Billy had a pet crow in the film). It just casually hops with its head down like it’s not paying attention to much of anything until it reaches a waste basket which it hops into. Hector barks some more and then inspects the waste basket only to find the crow is gone! I call it a crow, but it’s actually the Minah bird and this routine is straight out of classic Looney Tunes. The character first appeared in the short The Little Lion Hunter. Elsewhere, Hubie and Bertie question Tweety about the intelligence of Sylvester. Tweety shares his very low opinion of Sylvester, which just riles the cat up. He charges, but the mice jump out of the way and onto a window sill. When Sylvester pounces again, he goes out the window. Poor, stupid, kitty. He lands in the street and leaves behind a Sylvester-shaped crater in the snow. When he pops out, Granny and Willy are there to praise him for finding Willy’s tracks in the snow. Sylvester doesn’t seem to feel much pride in his “discovery.”
This guy hates Willy, and I’m kind of the same mind.
We then cut to the gang following the footprints and Sylvester narrates some more to inform us that old Willy’s memory is apparently failing him in his old age. Despite telling Granny he went straight to the bank, the footsteps lead them to a drug store. Bower is the name, and he’s not happy to see Willy. Mr. Bower (Cummings) complains (in what sounds like a drunken stupor) that Willy came in and ruffled through all of his magazines getting subscription cards all over his floor. He didn’t buy any of them, but he did buy a sasparilla and a newspaper which Bower notes he placed a yellow envelope inside. Granny thanks him for the info while he continues to just rant wildly. Upon leaving the store, the shopkeep follows them to tell Willy he has his keys which he apparently forgot earlier. During the rant, we are also treated to Hector teaming up with Hubie and Bertie to pulverize Sylvester. When Willy and Granny walk off, the others follow with Sylvester taking up the rear in a clearly concussed state. Bower also lets us know he hates keys for some reason. That’s sort of his thing, he hates everything. He’s also loosely based on the alcoholic drug store clerk from It’s a Wonderful Life, Mr. Gower, hence why he sounds vaguely intoxicated.
It’s a slightly off-model Cool Cat that arguably more resembles the Pink Panther. I’m going to stick with the assumption it’s Cool Cat, though it’s a bit odd that anyone would make the effort to try to find the lamest of the Looney Tunes characters.
Sylvester stumbles in the street and informs us the search continued “While visions of burly dogs danced in my head.” He slips on an icy sidewalk and finally goes down. Meanwhile, Willy is shown walking directly into a pole and it would appear a missing person sign on the pole contains an image of Cool Cat. It’s been there awhile, which makes sense since no one would actually look for Cool Cat. Granny tells her brother he needs to watch where he’s going. Sylvester chimes in to tell us that Granny’s patience is wearing thin while Willy dusts himself off. Out from his coat floats a piece of paper. It’s a ticket for a movie theater and Granny waves it in his face since he never mentioned anything about seeing a movie before the bank. Willy corrects her to say it wasn’t just a movie he saw, but a whole film festival! The subject of which was apparently Curly of The Three Stooges and Willy does his best Curly impression. Granny seems to be growing tired and demands to know if he went to the bank next or not. He didn’t. Instead, he mailed out his Christmas cards and gets mildly defensive about it when Granny shoots an angry glare his way as if it’s the cards she’s mad about.
Why does Granny insist on bringing her pets everywhere? It’s clear that Sylvester only cares about eating Tweety. Seems like it would just be easier to leave the cat at home.
The gang then heads to the mailbox that Willy apparently utilized to send out his cards. A mailman is there and is opening the base of the mailbox and out pops the Minah bird from earlier. He does his little walk-hop-shuffle once again and Hector follows. The bird disappears behind a lamp post leaving Hector more confused than ever. Willy and Granny were apparently granted permission to sort through the mail and Willy gets excited for a moment. Did he find his missing yellow envelope? No, he just found the Christmas card intended for Granny. She seems disappointed, but before she can say anything a passing cab stops to say “Hi” to Willy. The driver (sounds like Bennett again) thanks Willy for the tip he gave him this morning. Granny is once again angry with her brother for leaving out more important information and then asks the cabbie if it happened to be an eight-thousand dollar tip? He laughs and says “More like 8 cents,” before sharing with Granny that he drove Willy over to Rossi’s.
This horse thinks its hilarious.
We then cut to Rossi’s (I guess a play on Martini’s from the film) after Granny angrily demands they get in the cab. This time, the driver gets a twenty cent tip and sarcastically remarks how these two are going to spoil him. The fare was only $1.80 so twenty cents is honestly not that bad. I wouldn’t know what to tip on such a fare, though I can’t imagine $1.80 would get you very far in 2023. The cabbie then tells Willy he nearly forgot to remind him that he left something in his cab earlier. Willy is hopeful it’s his missing money, but it’s actually his horse. Yes, you read that right, he forgot a horse. And to add a little extra comedy to the whole thing, no one apparently noticed the horse during their most recent ride. The horse just a gives us all a good laugh and apparently no one has any reaction to this gag because we’re heading inside. Now let’s never speak of the horse again.
At least those feet are clean.
Rossi’s is an italian restaurant and Willy and Granny are greeted by the manager. He’s a tiny, italian, stereotype voiced by Jim Cummings and he asks Willy if he’s back for another hot chocolate. He’s not, but while the humans chat, Sylvester sets his sights on revenge. Hubie and Bertie see it coming though and they fling some sugar cubes at the cat which get lodged in his eyes. Rossi then remarks that Willy left something there earlier and gestures to it: a full, hot, steaming, bath tub. This guy has some tremendously deep pockets. The bath tub also has a rubber ducky floating in it and Hector pops up to get a closer look. The ducky then pops out of the water to reveal that the Minah bird was in there taking a bath. Hector finds this rather shocking and just sits there looking dumb-struck as the bird hops onto the edge of the tub, walks over Hector’s head, and off the screen to the right.
Stupid cat.
We now finally find ourselves at the bank where Willy supposedly lost his money. Again, no one is apparently going to address the crazy fact that this guy misplaced both a horse and a bath tub as well. They head into Totter Bank (instead of Potter Bank) while Granny insists that Willy tell her he’s sure that this was his last stop of the day. The two head inside and we’re introduced to old man Totter. He, rather predictably, resembles Potter from the movie. He’s small, bald, and wheelchair bound. Totter (Welker) races over to Willy, running over the foot of his handler in the process, to taunt Willy when he enters and asks if he’s back to try and score a free coaster without opening an account. Granny just declares he’s not a nice man which Totter seems to relish in. Outside, Sylvester goes back to chasing Hubie, Bertie, and Tweety referring to them as his little sugar plums. They duck into an alley and Sylvester races in to find snow depictions of the three. The stupid cat thinks the three are frozen with fear and gobbles them up, only to realize he was wrong. He looks at the camera with a pained expression, then reveals that all of his teeth have shattered. I’m not really sure why eating three snow versions of two mice and a canary would shatter his teeth, but okay. The camera pans up to show Tweety and the two mice enjoying Sylvester’s pain allowing Tweety to remark, “See? This is what happens when you don’t floss every day!”
Gasp! Totter had the money the whole time!
Back inside the bank, Willy shares with Totter the reason for their visit. If they think this man is truly one of wicked nature, I’m not sure telling him that eight-thousand dollars have been misplaced is really a good move. Totter just reacts angrily at the thought of Willy being in his bank to make a deposit with no money. He tells him it’s against the law and orders the two to leave immediately! Back outside, Sylvester is freezing while his foils look on. They apparently aren’t very interested in Sylvester’s misery and instead turn their attention to what’s behind the window they’re in front of. It’s an office, and Tweety notes a newspaper on the desk. In comes Totter being pushed in his wheelchair by some oversized goon even though we saw in the last scene that his wheelchair is motorized. He comes to the desk and opens the paper to reveal Willy’s missing envelope. He flashes the contents of it – a big wad of cash, then cheerfully places it in a desk drawer. Tweety and the others note that they have to do something about this and Tweety gives the camera a concerned look to serve as the act break. I’m assuming the animals can communicate with themselves, but not the humans. I didn’t watch enough of this show to know if it had rules or not, but those are pretty much the same rules as the classic shorts.
Totter is either not very bright or needs to see an optometrist.
We then cut to a rooftop at night and some individuals are making some serious grunting noises. It’s Tweety, Hubie, and Bertie and they’re holding onto a rope. The other end of which is in a chimney. At the end of that rope is Sylvester, and if you’re wondering where Hector is, he soon appears from between Sylvester’s robes. Robes? Yeah, they’re dressed as Santa Claus and Sylvester wonders aloud how they let the others talk them into this. The expression on Hector’s face would seem to indicate he feels the same way (he doesn’t talk, for some reason). The two get rather close to the fireplace, before the mice and canary predictably lose their grip. They crash to the ground in a heap of smoke, which gets the attention of old man Totter who is seated at his desk. He demands to know who is there, but upon seeing Sylvester’s disguise takes the bait. He asks “Santa” what he brought him and Sylvester looks a bit puzzled before apparently getting an idea. He reaches into his coat and comes out with a fitting gift: a dog collar. Totter is quite pleased with the kinky gift and even remarks that it matches his eyes. While he oggles the item, Hector reaches his hand out from the coat and grabs a stamp on the desk. The newspaper from earlier is still there, and the dog stamps it to indicate it came from the desk of Totter.
I had a feeling this bit would show up eventually.
Hector then grabs the paper and Sylvester gives out a “Ho ho ho” and a tug on the rope to indicate it’s time to go. On the roof, we see that the diminutive creatures have a plan for getting them back up the chimney: they’ve tied the rope to an anvil. They push it off the side of the building and it gets the job done, painfully so for Sylvester. As for Hector, he’s left behind in the office. He just smiles sheepishly at Totter, grabs his collar, and runs out the door. On the ground, Sylvester is shown with visions of Santa Claus flying circles around his head as he calls out the names of the reindeer, eventually getting them wrong because he’s suffered a pretty severe head injury. Hubie, Bertie, and Tweety come to check on him and when they open an eyelid we get the predictable “Do Not Open Till X-Mas” gag printed inside his eye. Tweety then scolds Sylvester for laying down on the job for they need to get that paper over to Granny and Willy. Hector then comes running by and grabs Sylvester by the tail and keeps on running forcing the little guys to chase after them. For such a big, beastly, dog, Hector sure seems scared of an old man in a wheelchair.
Well, I guess it is good that she brings all of the animals along since they’re the ones who cracked the case.
We find ourselves in the park where Willy and Granny are seated on a bench. Willy thinks the money is a lost cause while Granny tries to keep his spirits up telling him the answer isn’t going to just hit him in the face. It then does when Hector smacks him with the paper. Granny is happy to see them while Willy is confused since he’s looking at a story about aliens or something. Granny grabs it and notes a sarsaparilla stain, followed by cab grease, and more indicators that this paper belonged to Willy. They think they’re onto something, but when Willy spots the stamp with Totter’s name he just gets mopey again and assumes it’s not his paper. Granny, thankfully, isn’t so dumb.
And let us not forget the importance of the bird in all of this.
We then cut to Totter’s office and Granny is waving the paper in his face and accusing him of knowingly taking her brother’s money. Totter plays dumb at first, but then his desk bounces and shakes and a drawer opens. I bet you can guess who pops out: the Minah bird! He does his little walking routine as he hops onto the desk and marches over to Willy with an envelope in his beak. He hops onto Willy’s shoulder and he takes the envelope, the whole time everyone looks perplexed to see this bird. They then turn their angry gazes on Totter, who again tries to play dumb. Granny accuses him of taking the money to put Willy out of business and Totter cracks. Declaring “So what if I took the money?” He then goes into a rant about starting his own Totter-Ville and he’ll own everything. The cop that Granny and Willy apparently convinced to come along then starts wheeling the old man out as he starts wishing “Merry Christmas!” to everything he sees, George Bailey style, including the fireplace and Sylvester.
The second instance of something circling Sylvester’s head in this one. The gags just lack imagination.
With the old man wheeled off to jail, Willy goes to put the money away, only for Granny to wisely snatch it and promise to hold it for him. He then notices they still have time to make Christmas dinner at his nephew’s house, so he deposits the Minah bird under his hat and they make haste. Sylvester notes he’d like a drumstick or two and eyes Tweety who takes on the form of a roasted turkey to better illustrate what the cat is thinking. He takes off and Sylvester gives chase and the pair end up back in the alley. Sylvester dives and grabs ahold of the bird as they slide through the snow and end up in a pile of the white stuff. Sylvester pops his head out, then produces Tweety and goes to drop the bird in his mouth only to be met with a boulder-sized snowball. Somehow, Hubie managed to throw that thing at Sylvester and it looks like he added some bricks too since the dazed cat has one in his mouth. Tweety comes over with a tiny, silver, bell and rings it delivering the famous line “Every time a bell rings, an angel gets its wings.” Sylvester sits up and angel versions of himself are circling his head. He remarks, “Look at me, I’m giving out wings!” in a punch-drunk manner before collapsing once again as we close with an iris shot. Before the credits roll there’s an “In memory of Isadore “Friz” Freleng” which I believe appeared at the end of every episode in the show’s first season. Freleng was the originator of the Sylvester and Tweety shorts and passed away shortly before the premiere of the show at the ripe, old, age of 88. A fitting tribute for the animation legend.
If you really like the characters pictured above, then have at it. There’s a lot worse out there, but there’s also a lot better.
The Sylvester & Tweety Mysteries is a bit of an unremarkable series. The animation is okay for the era, though not as good as Animaniacs or Tiny Toon Adventures. It’s fluid though, it just lacks some of the flourishes of those shows and the gags aren’t especially novel. There’s basically no shading on the characters and it looks especially bad when Totter gets wheeled off to jail as he passes by a lightsource, but nothing on his character model changes. The premise still strikes me as a bit forced, but it works okay and was used as a means of getting in some cameos as we saw here with Hubie and Bertie and the Minah bird. It’s a show that’s not bad enough to be memorable as some abomination brought to television, but it’s also not really good enough to be remembered fondly as a classic from the 90s. And as a Christmas special, it’s kind of the same. I do think it’s an interesting premise and a useful way to work in It’s a Wonderful Life. Other applications are basically hack at this point and this one manages to be unique nearly 30 years later. It just doesn’t do anything special beyond that. There were no laugh-out-loud moments, no truly witty remark from any of the characters, and there’s also no heart to make up for the lack of comedy. It just exists and in this day and age it’s the type of Christmas special one comes to after they’ve exhausted all of their favorites. I suppose the real question is do I prefer this one to the show’s other holiday episode? I guess so? I don’t know. They’re both rather unremarkable, but I suppose the parody nature of this one makes it slightly more enjoyable. They work in plenty of references to the film, including snippets from the soundtrack, so if you really love that movie there’s some added enjoyment here. If not, then it just becomes a pretty haphazard mystery that doesn’t ask much of its audience. I don’t think this was the type of show that tried to be thoughtful with the mystery component. It’s just sort of “there” as a framing device and nothing more.
You could obviously do far worse with your time this year than spend it with Sylvester and Tweety. I would say if you only need one holiday themed short from the duo then you’re better off seeking out Gift Wrapped. If you have more fond memories of this show from the 90s then sure, go for it. I didn’t watch this one as a kid so I don’t have any attachment to it which is definitely something that’s working against it. I just never found the show interesting and often there was something better on. The show can be streamed on Max, whatever is left of it come publication of this piece, and I think it’s a part of Boomerang as well. The first season was also released on DVD way back in 2008 so it’s no longer in print, but can be found secondhand. The prices are fairly reasonable should you want to go that route, but if Warner dumps this from Max then it could see a bump.
Can’t wait until tomorrow for more Christmas? Check out what we had to say on this day last year and beyond:
Back in 1929 Walt Disney launched the Silly Symphonies series of cartoon shorts. Unlike the Mickey Mouse shorts that were growing popular at the time, Silly Symphonies did not center on just one character or even a group of characters, but rather were fairly self-contained. Some shorts that became popular, like The Three Little Pigs,…
Nickelodeon in the late 1980s was a network on the rise. Cable was expanding to more and more households each and every day and Nick was able to seize the youth market almost from the get-go. Prior to that, broadcast networks dominated children’s programming, but restricted it to certain parts of the broadcast schedule. And…
The Flintstones have a well-established relationship with Christmas at this point. There have been a few specials, some even prime time, and plenty of home video releases. For that reason it’s a bit interesting that the show actually waited until its fifth season for its first Christmas episode. At that point, the show had been…
It’s the fifth of December so that means we are returning to one of the 25 Greatest Christmas Specials (as decided by me because it’s my blog) to take a deeper look than what was done some 8 years ago. When I re-evaluated my Top 25, one of the biggest fallers was A Flintstone Christmas. It dropped from number 9 all the way down to 25! I attribute that drop to some of the shine waring off. When I did that countdown in 2015, I had probably only had the DVD for A Flintstone Christmas a short while. Prior to that, it was a thing I felt like I had to get lucky to catch on TV as a kid. It was the sort of special I only saw once a year, if that, so it never had a chance to ware out its welcome. Now that I own it, I’ve easily more than doubled my viewings over the years from when I was a kid, and while I still enjoy it, I do see more of the flaws. And at approximately 48 minutes, it gets a bit long. Had I known I was going to revisit all of these specials in the future in more detail, maybe I would have dropped it all together? Doing these write-ups for a broadcast hour-long special is pretty tiresome. I could have saved myself a whole lot of time if I just kept Morel Orel, but that would also be cheating! I think this one still belongs, even if just barely, so lets get to it.
A Flintstone Christmas was released in 1977 by Hanna-Barbera as one of the first post The Flintstones television specials. For all of the comparisons that we used to see between The Flintstones and The Simpsons,The Flintstones never had nearly the kind of run The Simpsons is still having. That’s true of a lot of shows, but I can still recall when passing The Flintstones was an important milestone for The Simpsons so it’s always a bit surprising to be reminded that The Flintstones aired from 1960 to 1966. This special came out more than ten years after the show had ceased production. It obviously aired seemingly endlessly in re-runs and there were spin-offs, but the show proper had a somewhat short existence. This special was apparently pretty successful though and the franchise gained new life via a series of specials in the early 80s. These cave people refused to die, though now they’re mostly cereal and vitamin pitchmen.
During the show’s run, there was the episode “Christmas Flintstone.” We’ve already covered that one extensively here, but to summarize, Fred ends up taking on the role of Santa Claus to basically save Christmas. For A Flintstone Christmas, the same plot is recycled and expanded upon with some differences. Perhaps most notably, Barney is now along for the ride. And since this was a television special, the running time is doubled and we get some songs tossed in. Perhaps most notably these days, is the circumstances for Fred taking on the Santa role have been altered. In “Christmas Flintstone,” Santa has a cold and has his elves track down the guy he thinks is best at playing him which turns out to be Fred. In this special, Santa falls off of Fred’s roof and gets hurt so he needs Fred to take over. It’s a plot that’s pretty damn close to a certain movie starring Tim Allen. Of course, in The Santa Clause old Saint Nick actually kicks the bucket. That movie was more interested in showing how some jerk can basically turn into Santa Claus and assume that identity permanently. A Flintstone Christmas just wants to put Fred in a sled.
The Flintstones are probably a safer bet than this drugged-out dog and mouse.
Something I did not talk about when first covering A Flintstone Christmas was its relation to another Hanna-Barbera Christmas special: A Christmas Story. That special about a mouse and a dog trying to deliver a letter to Santa doesn’t share any plot details with this one. It doesn’t even feature any popular characters. The only thing it does share with this special is the music. Multiple songs from the 1972 special are recycled and repurposed for this one. It’s pretty odd, and I can’t find any account for why that took place, but I have some thoughts. A Christmas Story, not featuring any recognizable Hanna-Barbera characters, may have been viewed as a dud. It’s a lot easier to market Fred and Scooby-Doo than it is Goober and Gumdrop. That special was also written by Ken Spears and Jack Ruby, the former top duo at Hanna-Barbera who would leave to form Ruby-Spears animation. That duo is credited with creating Scooby-Doo and they left Hanna-Barbera in 1977. Ruby-Spears was created to compete directly with Hanna-Barbera, so maybe burying their Christmas special and using some of the assets to create this new one was a shot at them? Considering the timing, that seems unlikely, but it is more juicy to think of this one as born out of a grudge between the aging duo of Hanna and Barbera waging war with their former proteges.
I suppose it’s time we just dive into this one since this is going to be a rather lengthy write-up. For A Flintstone Christmas, most of the case of The Flintstones was able to return. One person who was not was Alan Reed, the original voice of Fred Flintstone. He passed away in 1977 opening the door for Henry Corden to assume the role. This was not Corden’s first time voicing Fred, but it was probably the most exposure his Fred voice had received as previously he was doing things like records and wrap-arounds on package shows as the character. He had also already been Fred’s singing voice in The Man Called Flintstone as singing was something Reed either couldn’t do or disliked doing. As for the rest of the cast, both Mel Blanc and Jean Vander Pyl were back as Barney and Wilma. Gay Hartwig voices Betty Rubble and she had been doing the character since 1970, though she had never voiced Betty on the actual series. Also returning is John Stephenson as Mr. Slate and Hal Smith as Santa Claus. Smith was basically the Hanna-Barbera Santa. Making her debut as Bamm-Bamm Rubble, is Lucille Bliss, a prolific voice actor who, to my surprise, didn’t voice Bamm-Bamm much. He and Pebbles (voiced by Vander Pyl) are basically kids in this one and I don’t think there is a ton of Flintstones productions where they are at this age so that might explain things.
Betty and Bamm-Bamm are just along for the ride, I guess.
The special begins with a snowy setting. Dinosaurs are peering around and some serene music fills the air. The song is “Sounds of Christmas Day,” our first piece of recycled music from A Christmas Story. After we’re shown the title, a sleigh comes into frame. It’s being driven by Wilma and she’s joined by her daughter Pebbles, friend Betty, and her son Bamm-Bamm. The sleigh is being pulled by a blue mastodon and they’ve just picked out their tree for Christmas. Curiously, only Wilma and Pebbles have selected a tree and it would seem the Rubbles are just along for the ride. They’re rather content with their selection though as they head towards Bedrock.
I’m a little jealous of Fred and Barney’s relationship. I wouldn’t mind having a buddy to do my Christmas shopping with.
In the snowy town below, Fred and Barney are roaming the streets. They’re dressed as they always are, but they’ve added a scarf to fight the cold. They still have not invented shoes, apparently, so they’re just walking through the snow in bare feet. Barney remarks how another Christmas is upon them which allows the two to reminisce a bit as they look at toys through a shop window. Already, the special has committed a sin against The Flintstones brand by depicting a toy train that’s just moving on its own without any explanation for how it could be powered. I’ll overlook the lighting in the street, but come on, at least have it being pulled by a mouse or something!
A lot of people get in on the Santa act this time of year, but I can’t say I’ve ever seen this many in one spot.
As the two walk through town, Barney keeps casually tossing coins into the collection buckets manned by bell-ringing Santas all about town. Fred makes a crack about Barney going Bro-bro-broke this holiday season if he keeps this up, but Barney confesses he has a weakness for Santa. And since there are so many, he has to keep donating just in case one of them happens to be the real Santa! This leads us into our first song break of the special, “Which One is the Real Santa Claus?” This is another of the recycled songs from A Christmas Story and it’s basically the same, only now Fred and Barney get to interject here and there as they look over these Santas. The premise of the song is just to show us a bunch of different people playing Santa, and Fred and Barney get to point out the inaccuracies like the one with his whiskers tied to his head or the one with a belly full of straw. The recording sounds like its exactly the same from A Christmas Story, and even Fred and Barney’s comments are the same as Gumdrop’s remarks. It’s amusing to me that they apparently didn’t bother to re-record it, but I guess they liked it as-is. I will say, the animation is more lively for A Flintstone Christmas and not as repetitive. And it’s a good observation for a Christmas special to base a song on.
When the song is finished, Fred and Barney resume this town crawl they’re on. I assume they’re Christmas shopping since Fred does have a gift under his arm. Their meandering leads them to a pet shop where the two look at a bunch of little dinosaurs that look in Dino. Fred thinks one looks like his boss, I guess because it’s small? Barney ponders the thought of getting Bamm-Bamm a pet for Christmas (I thought they had Hoppy?) and theorizes that one could double as a guard dog. When Fred laughs and points out how little the pup is, he gets bitten on the finger for underestimating the runt.
Since it’s the morning of Christmas Eve I guess they didn’t wait until the last minute.
The next morning, the Rubbles approach the Flintstone’s house. Barney is apparently giving Fred a ride to work while inside Fred is decorating the tree Wilma and Pebbles picked out the night before. It seems an odd time to decorate a tree, but maybe it’s an ancient cave man custom? Barney yanks the door bell, which is a monkey’s tail. He’s alerted to ding some bells which are colored red and green for the holidays. When done, he just goes back to sleep. What? No sarcastic remark?!
Fred must have one hell of a tree stand under that tree skirt.
Fred, who is on top of a ladder in a precarious position, seems excited that Barney is here to take him to work. Dino is excited too and his running by caused Fred to teeter. Eventually, the ladder will fall leaving Fred dangling from the tree like an oversized, grumpy, ornament. As the Rubbles enter and admire the tree, Betty quietly asks Wilma if she had a chance to ask Fred about something. She has, twice, and he’s said “No” to whatever this secret request is. Barney and Fred need to have a contest of ornament placement for some reason, with Barney selecting a spot for the final one (they all look like painted rocks) that Fred disagrees with just because they’re men and everything has to be a competition. He then places it in the spot he declares is perfect with predictable results. The tree falls on him pinning him to the floor, but good thing Barney is here to remind us that Bamm-Bamm is the strongest kid in the world and he effortlessly picks the tree up with one hand to free his Uncle Fred.
You know Wilma, he’d probably be willing to play Santa if you stuck up for him every once and awhile when someone calls him fat.
Wilma thanks the lad for his assistance then tells Pebbles to take Bamm-Bamm to go listen to some records because she needs to talk to her father. When the kids are gone, Wilma and Betty try to bring up the topic again. It seems that a local women’s group is hosting a gathering tonight, on Christmas Eve, for the town kids and they want Fred to play Santa. Fred refuses on account of the guys at work will poke fun at him and right on cue Barney wonders where they could find a suit big enough to fit Fred. Fred uses that as proof of what he’s talking about and refuses to discuss it further. Barney kisses his wife goodbye while Fred storms off. He then pops back into frame to give Wilma a kiss as well (on the cheek, these guys are still prudes) which softens her demeanor. They don’t seem too discouraged by Fred’s refusal, likely because they have an ace up their sleeves. Or they would if they wore sleeves.
You have to be close friends to be willing to ride in that together.
We next find Barney dropping Fred off for work. Barney’s car appears to be a hollowed out log on wheels. We only see it from the side, but it sure doesn’t look like a two-seater. That must have been a very uncomfortable ride (or perhaps extremely comfortable, depending on how they feel about each other). Fred heads into work and is immediately told by the foreman, Ed (Don Messick), that Mr. Slate wants to see him. This immediately unnerves Fred, but Ed doesn’t care and cheerfully tells him that he’ll help Fred look for a new job. Nice guy.
The dinosaur being named Otis is a smart touch.
Fred heads inside to the elevator and pulls the lever to take it down. As he does so, he’s just muttering to himself trying to reason why Mr. Slate would want to see him. It’s a reassuring exercise as he’s trying to convince himself there’s no way he should be fired. Once the elevator is engaged, we see it’s operated by a brontosaurus like dinosaur. He’s green and he operates the elevator via a rope in his mouth. When Fred pulls the lever, the guy on his back (voiced by Hal Smith) gives the command to start moving which lets the elevator go down. He then complains the dinosaur is moving too slow and that this is supposed to be an express elevator (it’s only one, maybe two stories at most). The dinosaur just looks at the guy and says “Huh?” and as he does he lets go of the rope causing the elevator to plummet to the bottom. Fred is in such a daze though that he doesn’t even notice and continues walking like nothing happened.
I probably don’t need to tell you what he’s saying. You know.
Outside Mr. Slate’s office, Fred tells the secretary he’s here. She speaks into an intercom telling Mr. Slate that Flintstone has arrived and a little purple bird makes a stereotypical parrot sound and flies off. It lands in another intercom box in Mr. Slate’s office and repeats what the secretary said. Mr. Slate calls for Fred to enter, and the bird flies off and relays the message. After doing so, he mugs for the camera and remarks, “Eh, it’s a living.” I feel like anytime someone makes a joke about The Flintstones in such a way that’s the line they always parrot, pun intended. Family Guy has definitely done this, right? I wonder how many times that line has been delivered by a creature on the show in a similar manner?
Oh Fred, have some dignity.
Fred enters the office and asks Mr. Slate what he wanted to see him about. Mr. Slate starts talking about a new job for Fred which immediately causes him to start groveling. He dives under Mr. Slate’s desk so he can grab his ankles and beg which just annoys the guy. He requests Fred to grovel standing up and Fred does as he’s told. This is so pathetic, Fred. Mr. Slate then tells him that the Women’s Auxiliary Club is hosting an event for underprivileged children and that Mrs. Slate wants Fred to play Santa Claus. This is the exact same gig Wilma and Betty were trying to get him to take, but since it’s now coming from his boss, Fred is more than happy to accept. He shakes Mr. Slate’s hand so hard that it won’t stop shaking. Fred happily scoops up the box containing the Santa suit and assures Mr. Slate he won’t regret this. As he heads out, he exits through a door that is clearly not the one he entered through. He closes it behind him, but then reemerges to wish Mr. Slate a “Merry Christmas!” Slate then orders Fred to get out of his closet and he sheepishly pokes his head out and apologizes referring to him as “Boss” in the process. Pathetic.
Always a popular move to have your main character build a snowman.
With that settled, Fred can now merrily exit the office. He punches in, and we see a tired, worn out, little bird has to chisel the time cards each time someone punches in and out. He’s too tired to offer a quip of any kind. There’s then a time skip and Fred is leaving work much happier than he entered. He tosses a coin to the first Santa he sees before going into his solo song – “It’s My Favorite Time of the Year.” This is Fred just galivanting about town telling us how Christmas is his favorite time of the year. Similar to “Which One is the Real Santa Claus?” Fred will sing a part then interject a comment of some kind like “Every house wears a blanket of snow!” This breaks up the melody, which is a bit jarring and an odd choice. We also get another shot of a toy train, different from before, and for some reason Fred indicates it will soon be his? I may have missed a detail in the song. It ends with him putting his turtle shell helmet on a snowman some kids made before stepping on a sleigh that sends him hurtling towards the neighborhood.
I can’t decide if Dino is being sweet or weird. This goes on for minutes.
When Fred arrives, his helmet has returned to his head and he eagerly heads into the house calling for Wilma. Dino (Blanc) has other plans as the dinosaur practically mauls his beloved master and Wilma has to get him off. She points out that Dino just loves him, and as Fred stands and tells Wilma the now good news Dino has a hand on his shoulder like a supportive lover. It’s both adorable and a little weird. Fred then tells Wilma how Mrs. Slate wants him to play Santa Claus at the party tonight. When Wilma asks what changed his mind, Fred starts to go over the events from earlier, but he retells them in a very different manner. In his version, Mr. Slate called him into the office and started buttering him up and told him he was selected for his fantastic acting ability (Fred already asked Mr. Slate if that was the reason, and the bird from the office confirmed it was because he’s fat). He’s excited now though and Wilma, who likely sees through her husband’s ruse, just lets him have this small victory.
You would think Mr. Slate could afford a better suit.
With Pebbles across the street at the Rubbles’ house, Fred is free to try on the suit Mr. Slate gave him. He’s a bit dismayed to see it’s pretty rugged looking. Wilma assures him he’ll look better with the hat on which seems to work to cheer him up once he places it upon his head. Strangely, there’s no beard with this suit which seems like a pretty serious omission. Barney then arrives and he’s able to get in a bunch of fat jokes at Fred’s expense. Seriously, is Fred really that big? He looks pretty normal for a character on this show. Anyway, Fred even tries to just go along with him this time claiming he’s dedicated to the role, but Barney just keeps going and Fred has to basically threaten him with violence, in a subtle manner, to get him to stop. Fred’s actually a decent guy for not going low with return insults. Barney is both short and also struggled with infertility, those are some easy targets. Wilma then announces she’s leaving to help set up for the party. She blows her husband a kiss and heaps a ton of praise on him for doing what he’s doing. It’s actually really sweet.
Maybe the presence of footwear on Santa indicates that he exists outside of time?
As Fred and Barney muse about what a great “gal” Wilma is, they hear a crashing sound coming from the roof. They race outside and see what should be two unfamiliar objects poking out of a snow bank. They’re boots, and apparently they do know what boots are despite never wearing any. Fred and Barney both give a tug which just causes the boots to come off. When they wonder who they belong to, a voice from offscreen says “They’re mine!” It’s Santa, and he has completely emerged from the snow bank with not a flake upon him. He’s been redesigned since “Christmas Flintstone” and looks far less ragged. Fred is wondering what this guy is doing so far from his street corner while Barney immediately recognizes the guy for who he is. He then complains to Fred about his roof and describes it as an obstacle course up there. The guy’s hurt too, so Fred decides they better bring him inside.
Not many mall Santas have one of those.
Once in the house, Santa requests the use of Fred’s telephone. Fred says okay, but tells him no long distance calls! Santa then flops on the surely comfortable stone couch and asks the operator to connect him with The North Pole. Hey, he said no long distance! Fred hears this and surprisingly doesn’t get mad, instead he tells Barney to go alert the asylum that one of their boys got out. Barney reluctantly does as he’s told, but once outside he hears something which directs his gaze to the roof. Sure enough, upon that roof sits Santa’s sleigh and eight reindeer. Surprisingly, we’re playing it straight with the reindeer and not going with some sort of dinosaur hybrid. Barney shouts out for Fred to come and see this and initially Fred tries to silence him so as not to alarm the neighbors. Fred then finally looks at the roof and sees what Barney sees. Finally, he’s convinced this is the real Santa which excites the crap out of him! He jumps up and does his running in place gag and yanks Barney backs inside the house.
Now they’re starting to look the part.
Now that Fred has been made a believer, the three of them can get down to the matter at hand. Not only is Santa injured, he’s also caught a cold. Fred points out the obvious that Santa is in no condition to deliver presents tonight and Santa is forced to admit that sad truth. He can’t take a day off though, not on Christmas Eve! He then wonders how he could possibly find someone jolly enough, and fat enough, to replace him. Barney is happy to point out that his chubby friend is the perfect fill-in and even volunteers to be Fred’s elf helper. Santa thinks this is a great idea and uses some Christmas magic to outfit Barney with a green tunic with orange stockings and a hat. Fred, in his rather sad excuse for a Santa suit, can’t be seen in public like that so Santa uses his magic to bestow his suit on Fred instead complete with a big, white, beard. Fred is pretty smitten with his new threads, and after Santa thoroughly confuses him with instructions for piloting the sleigh, Fred vows to not let Santa down! He then immediately trips over Santa’s legs and falls flat on his face. Santa seems less than confident about what’s about to take place, but I say cut the guy some slack. This is likely his first time ever wearing boots!
There aren’t a lot of effects shots in this one, but the glittering sleigh is at least a nice touch.
Up on the roof, Fred tries to remember how to start the sleigh. Barney reminds him that he has to call out the reindeer by name and we soon find out that Fred has no idea what their names are. As he embarrasses himself, Barney is left to chuckle and then correct him. He calls out the reindeer’s names and as he does we pan to each one like the animators are showing off that they did indeed draw eight of them. The sleigh rockets into the sky and Fred congratulates himself for remembering. The animation of the flying sleigh isn’t super ambitious, but it is nice looking as there’s a lot of sparkle effects added like it’s running atop a glittering road.
This is going about as well as expected.
Fred and Barney arrive at the first house and Fred dives into the chimney with his customary “Yabba dabba do!” and has a fairly harsh landing. At least the fireplace wasn’t lit. Barney calls down to see if he’s okay and Fred sarcastically tells him he loves falling down chimneys. He then calls for the presents and Barney just dumps them down the chimney burying his friend below. Some helper. We then cut quickly to the party that Fred is supposed to show up at. Mr. Slate is wondering where Fred is while Wilma is there to assure him that Fred will be along soon. We’ll be checking in on this situation a lot tonight. Back at the house, Barney asks Fred if he’s done yet only for Fred to reply that he’s been done for awhile, he just can’t get back up the chimney. Barney suggests the front door and Fred agrees that’s a sensible solution to his problem. He quietly exits the house, but as he does he fails to notice the “Beware of Dog” sign. A little triceratops style dinosaur sneaks up on Fred and bites his foot. He howls, but the pain caused him to jump up onto the roof so I’d say mission accomplished!
Apparently, things have to get worse before they can get better.
At the next house, Fred has decided that it’s Barney who should go down the chimney instead. He has Barney standing on the chimney with a rope around his waist that Fred is holding onto at ground level. He’s wrapped it around the mailbox for added security. Barney has to ask why it’s he who is going down the chimney now and I assume he just wants to hear Fred admit that he’s too fat. With a chuckle, Barney jumps down the chimney, but he does so before Fred can yell “Go!” His descent catches Fred by surprise pulling him up onto the roof and into the chimney as well where he gets stuck with his feet sticking out. I wonder how many more fat jokes we have to endure?
It’s now time for a montage! Clearly, if we were to follow Fred and Barney to every house this thing would last way longer than 48 minutes so instead we just see them fly past obvious, global, landmarks while presents rain down from the sky. It’s set to the main theme of the special in an instrumental fashion, but soon some lyrics come in. “Sounds of Christmas Day” is performed as we see kids receive their presents which fall from the sky. They celebrate Christmas by ice skating, sledding, and doing what kids love to do most on Christmas Day – open presents!
And things were starting to turn around too.
When the song is over we check in with Fred and Barney. They’re feeling mighty good about the job they’ve done and Fred informs us they’re halfway through. Unfortunately, we have about 20 minutes left in this thing still to go so we need some conflict. Enter: The Storm! Turbulence causes things to get pretty bumpy in the sleigh. Fred tries to fly over it, but it’s no good. We see the pair bounce around and then cut to a close-up shot of the sleigh to see that there are no presents in the sleigh! This is a true Christmas emergency, but we back out for a longer shot and see the presents are returned. Phew, it was just an animation error. Wait a minute! They’re bouncing around again, and now the presents have bounced out! Oh, woe be to Christmas, presents for half of the kids in the world just fell out of the sleigh to land who knows where. This is a problem.
Falling off the roof probably wasn’t fun, but this is still a pretty sweet gig for Santa.
Barney soon takes note of a CB radio in the sleigh. He suggests they see if they can contact Santa via that device and Fred jumps onto it calling out for Santa. Barney tells him he can’t talk like that on a CB radio, you have to use CB talk! Barney takes over and calls out “Sky Sled to Big Red, do you have a copy?” which allows Fred to ask “A copy of what?” I’ve definitely never heard that one before. Eventually, Santa does answer and we see him back at Fred’s house where he just pulls the radio out of…lets not speculate. He doesn’t even let Barney explain and tells him he knows that they blew it. Fred then jumps on and tells Santa about the storm and, to Santa’s credit, he sounds concerned for their well-being upon hearing that detail. Fred tells him what happened, and Santa declares there’s only one thing they can do: head back to the work shop for more toys.
If I were William Hanna or Joseph Barbera I would have this background hanging on my wall. I’d also be dead, so maybe it’s not so bad that I’m not one of them.
This is the point of the special where things start to feel a little long. This is clearly a detour that exists to just pad this one out, but it is what it is. Santa phones ahead to alert the shop to expect the two and we soon see Fred and Barney arrive. The exterior of Santa’s place is lovingly painted with the northern lights hovering in the sky overhead. The two head inside and are greeted by Mrs. Claus (Virginia Gregg) who tells the two the work shop is already working hard to fill the order. Barney and Fred take some time to admire the toys and when Mrs. Claus remarks they have the biggest Christmas list in the world, Fred gives her a “Yeah” that sounds so unimpressed, but I think it’s unintentional.
Maybe this sequence exists because someone felt we had to see the work shop?
The two offer to assist in the work shop and Mrs. Claus, either humoring them or admitting they need all the help they can get, leads the pair in. They have to take a tram of sorts to get there and in no time at all Fred and Barney find themselves accidentally on the assembly line. Fred gets painted blue and the two get stuffed in a box by an automatic wrapper. They poke their heads out to take in the sights and see the elves hard at work. At this point, another song has kicked in and it’s called “A Brand New Kind of Christmas Song,” which sounds like the type of song one would write when padding out a Christmas special. It’s fairly unremarkable, but also not offensive or anything, and it has this horn gimmick it returns to frequently. Fred and Barney, predictably, are of no help as they act like kids might if they happened upon a magic toy shop. About the most help they provide is singing the final verse of the song.
Thank goodness these kids aren’t armed.
When the song is over the pair thank the elves and Mrs. Claus and say their goodbyes. Fred tries to recall the names of the reindeer, but can’t get past Dasher without the aid of Barney. He only calls out four names, but the reindeer get the idea and take off anyway. As the two remark what a great lady Mrs. Claus is, we cut back to the Bedrock Hall where Fred is supposed to make an appearance as Santa Claus. At this point the kids are all loudly demanding that Santa show his face and the adults don’t know what to do. Mr. Slate is more than a little irritated and threats of someone getting fired have begun. Wilma wonders where they could be and checks her watch. It’s digital, but it displays time in Roman numerals so…eh? Betty tries to reassure her that they’re probably planning a dramatic entrance, but Wilma is unconvinced and walks off wondering if Fred will lose his job. This leaves Betty to break the fourth wall by telling us that will be a great Christmas present – a pink slip. It’s a common style of delivery for jokes on The Flintstones, but it feels weird without a laugh track.
When the realization hits that you’ve ruined Christmas by saving Christmas.
We then rejoin Fred and Barney as they deliver toys. They’ve solved their chimney problem by having Fred just drop presents from the sleigh down the chimney -that’s convenient! Barney remarks this is like having a party which causes Fred to remember the actual party. He immediately gets knocked off his game since he is sure that Mr. Slate will fire him for being a no-show tonight. With no other thing they can do, they call Santa once again. This time we’re not privy to the conversation and instead we jump forward in time so Fred can tell us that Santa told them to push the super speed button in the sleigh. Now that we’ve deus ex machina’d this little problem it’s time to return to Bedrock Hall.
There’s going to be a lot of stale cookies in the morning out there.
And at the hall, the kids have not let up and Mr. Slate is implying there will be violence the next time he sees Fred. If you thought that meant he and Barney were about to show up then you’d be wrong. The special instead feels it’s important that we jump back to Fred and Barney just to see them make the last delivery. The super speed button is the biggest cheat code in any Christmas special as it allows them to zoom over a village and the presents just fall from the sky like homing missiles. They know where to go apparently, and so does Fred as he commands the reindeer to head for Bedrock!
Pebbles’ idyllic Christmas.
In Bedrock Hall, Mr. Slate is now apparently hiding from this agitated mob of children behind a curtain. He tells Wilma that if Fred doesn’t show up in one minute he need not show up at all – here or at work! Wilma looks rather concerned, understandably, but has to put on a happy face as Pebbles approaches and declares that Santa isn’t coming. Wilma tells her she needs to have hope, which is when another recycled song from A Christmas Story enters – “Hope.” It’s a melancholy little song and it’s really not bad if you’re into that sort of thing. As it’s played, we see images of Pebbles waking up on Christmas morning and heading for the tree. We see Fred and Wilma looking on and exchanging gifts as well. I like the closing line of “Hope believes in Santa Claus,” and it’s a sequence I really want to love, but at this point in the special it’s arriving when we’re firmly in “Get to the fireworks!” mode.
Welcome, Santa!
And we are finally there as we cut to Fred and Barney flying over Bedrock. They basically crash land on the roof of the hall which throws them from the sleigh and down the chimney. They land on their butts, but the kids don’t care about style points tonight as they immediately start cheering for Santa! Mr. Slate looks rather bewildered at the entrance, maybe he’s a bit shocked to see how well the ratty old suit he gave Fred earlier looks on him, and he soon approaches the pair. Betty and Wilma embrace in relief that the two arrived while Mr. Slate angrily gets in Fred’s face. “Ten seconds more and you would have been fired Flintstone!” His face then immediately switches to a smile as he adds, “But not after an entrance like that! Welcome Santa Claus, welcome to Bedrock!”
If Santa can just magic-up presents when he needs them then why did they have to go back to the work shop after losing all of the presents? Why have a work shop at all?!
Unfortunately for Fred, he doesn’t have time to bask in the praise he just received from his boss because these kids are demanding presents. Fred reaches into his sack to retrieve them, only to find it empty. It’s at this point he realizes they got rid of all the presents in the sleigh and have none left. The kids are practically frothing at the mouth as Barney encourages Fred to try and see if he has any of that Christmas magic in him. He concedes that he can try, while Mr. Slate is thoroughly confused at what they’re talking about and demands they produce presents! Fred points his mittens at the bag and it explodes with presents! They land on the floor around them and the kids stampede on over. In yet another sign that we’re stalling for time, the animation cycles twice of the kids running so we see Pebbles and Bamm-Bamm, along with the other random kids, run past the camera twice despite said camera remaining in a fixed spot.
He makes it look so easy.
Fred and Barney bask in the glow of a job well done, but only for a moment as they soon realize they left Santa back at the house. They run out of there and race back to Fred’s house where the jolly old elf has apparently made a full recovery. He thanks the boys for a job well done and even offers that, should he ever find himself in another pinch, he’ll be calling. Santa then takes back his suit and he needs to get out of there because Wilma, Betty, and the kids are approaching. The women are also pretty salty at Fred and Barney for not staying to help clean up so they will have some explaining to do. Before Santa can leave though, Fred has to ask him one thing: how to get back up the chimney? Santa gives a chuckle and apologizes for not telling him how. He then demonstrates by placing a finger beside his nose, and then up the chimney he goes in a cloud of sparkles.
Time for the boys to come clean.
The gang then enters and Pebbles and Bamm-Bamm are still excited from their visit from Santa Claus and his elf. Fred and Barney give a little chuckle as Wilma and Betty storm over and demand to know what happened with them tonight. There’s no sense in hiding it, so they tell the truth: Santa fell off the roof and they had to pitch in and help with the presents. Wilma and Betty laugh and when Fred suggests they don’t believe them Wilma adds “Of course I don’t!” However, they’re still pretty smitten as well following that grand entrance and just can’t stay mad at their boys.
Fred getting bailed out by Christmas Magic yet again!
It’s then proposed that they exchange presents. Betty starts off by giving Barney his and he, in turn, pulls a present out from behind his back. Just where was he hiding that thing? Wilma hands Fred his and Fred reaches into his pocket to find…a hole. It’s implied he forgot, but lucky for him a certain magic man in a red suit owes him a favor. A wrapped present comes floating out of the fireplace and lands in Wilma’s hands. She laughs and remarks what a thoughtful way to deliver her gift completely ignoring the implausible nature of it all. She then does exactly what parents tell their children not to do -she openly speculates that it’s the present she wants most as she opens it. Seriously Wilma? That’s a real dick move! Fred can only cross his fingers that Santa got her the earrings she apparently wanted, but since this is Santa we’re talking about, Fred has nothing to fear. The gaudy sabretooth earrings are indeed in the box and both Betty and Wilma admire them. We don’t get to see what anyone else got.
Safe to say that these two will never lose the Christmas Spirit.
Wilma thanks Fred, and he apparently learned something tonight to not take credit for other people’s work (like he did with Barney all night) and tells Wilma she should really be thanking Santa. The kids then start calling out that they see Santa flying in the sky from the window. Wilma and Betty have a giggle at the imaginations of children while Fred and Barney race over to the window and start waving bye themselves. The women seem stunned a moment, but then laugh again. Wilma remarks that they certainly have the Christmas Spirit and Fred and Barney confirm to her that they sure do. We cut to the sky and are treated to a moon shot as Santa flies by. It’s he who gets the customary last line as he calls out “Merry Christmas to all!” and we close on a shot of Bedrock from sky level.
They sure know how to end a Christmas special.
That is definitely a long one, but a charming one. I wasn’t shy about sharing my thoughts on when things started to feel like they were overstaying their welcome, but I enjoy the final pay-off at Bedrock Hall. Mr. Slate essentially does a Scrooge routine where he acts like he’s about to make life miserable for the protagonist, only to turn the tables on him. It’s effective and I love it here. The overall plot is also a good one. It’s easy to lose sight of that since it is so similar to “Christmas Flintstone,” but having your main characters take over for Santa on Christmas Eve is a good premise. Certainly far better than a parody, which The Flintstones will resort to in the future.
This being Hanna-Barbera, the animation isn’t anything to write home about. It’s better than a typical TV show and at least we get new character models with Fred and Barney in their Santa and elf costumes. They did do all eight reindeer, so I’ll give credit there since so many shows skimp on that detail, and the shots from the sleigh look rather nice. There’s just little to no attempt at special effect shots. Dino tackles Fred offscreen, Santa emerges from the snowbank offscreen, shortcuts like that permeate this one. There’s also a liberal use of recycled animation throughout. The train set from the beginning of the special is the same train set we see at Santa’s work shop, for example. It adds to the padded nature of this one. It definitely didn’t need to be 48 minutes, though I do think having a little extra than a typical episode of The Flintstones helps. A recut would certainly benefit the special. Or, if instead of making it shorter we just got to see more Fred and Barney delivering presents hijinks instead of the North Pole that might have been better. We basically see them deliver gifts at just two houses.
The train set so great we had to see it twice.
The music is rather pleasant throughout. “Sounds of Christmas Day” is essentially the theme of the special and it’s lovely as an instrumental. The special didn’t rely on public domain music, though it did recycle songs from that other Christmas special. It’s kind of funny that they did because those songs weren’t remarkable by any means, but again, it’s probably better than hearing “Jingle Bells” once again. The only song I could have done without is the one from the work shop, but that whole sequence could be dropped, as far as I’m concerned. And even though I said it was weird for Betty’s joke to lack a laugh track, that doesn’t mean I miss one. It’s actually really refreshing to watch The Flintstones and not have to hear one every 10 seconds.
I’m happy with where I have this ranked, but it could have been higher without this needless detour.
Is A Flintstone Christmas one of the top 25 Christmas Specials of all time? For me it is. I’m not really a fan of The Flintstones, but I did watch the show a fair amount growing up. I’ve always liked the premise more than the execution when it comes to the show. I can’t really remember any specific episodes in great detail from my youth as it was one of those shows that was just on. As such, I don’t think nostalgia is playing a huge role in my enjoyment here. I suppose it is in the sense that I did get a little excited when I would come across this special as a kid just because it was something I didn’t see a lot. As someone who watched the same specials over and over year in and year out you can probably see how anything that felt “new” to me could be appealing. And yet, aside from the over reliance on fat jokes, this one charms the hell out of me. If it was just a little tidier it would be better, but as is, I still enjoy it quite a bit and I think you will too.
If you would like to make A Flintstone Christmas part of your Christmas viewing this year, it’s both easy and a little difficult. The DVD is one of those burn-on-demand releases and can still be found for fairly cheap and it comes with A Flintstone Family Christmas, a decent 90s addition to The Flintstone world. The special is available to rent on Prime video and Vudu, but is not presently on a streaming service. It is available for free on The Internet Archive and in great quality at that. It’s also available in other corners of the internet for free, but maybe at a lesser quality and likely with a Cartoon Network or Boomerang logo in the corner.
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